“Hey Joey, you sleeping? I’m coming in” It’s Twilights voice clearly as she opens the door after a few seconds, stepping into the room. Well my bet hit, where’s my money punk? Yea I’m talking to you reader, cough it up.

I don’t remember betting, but if I did I would have bet twilight, too.

Hmm, she’s probably right but, still it pisses me off she’d set me up like that. I look to Twilights face to see her in anticipation to my response and also.... embarrassment? I look to see the situation we find ourselves in, me in my pajamas over the unicorn as she’s pinned under the covers beneath. My face reaches a similar color as Twilights, I sit back allowing her to get up. We both look away from each other in silence.

I’m so stupid to not have realized what that looked like until now.

“Nothing big, also I couldn’t sleep last night like before, to be honest I think it’s the collar, ever since I put it on I started feeling shitty again. Does that make sense at all?”

Actually, it makes a lot of sense.

“Well it’s likely the magic within you is the reason you feel so sick, and wearing that collar keeps it all bottled up. We should find a way to safely release your magic in case it becomes too much”

I may have figured out how his magic works.

How am I supposed to live like this? I’m going to be a ticking time bomb if a don’t blow my magic load every so often or else who the fuck knows what happens!

I have a dirty mind.

“Nothing right now but you are a different species so maybe you’ll be fine? The only other pony to suffer with this type of magic was just that, a pony” She says while shrugging her shoulders.

There were others with the same magic?

“Rare?! You can’t call her that! She’s a sophisticated mare, she deserves more respect!” Spike clearly getting angry.

If that’s how rarity thinks of herself as well, then she needs to get off her high HORSE. (I’m bad at jokes.)

This stops him for a second, before he jumps off the table and faces me. “Your not allowed to call her rare or hit on her or do anything that you know I won’t like!” He puffs out his chest with his stubby arms crossed.

What’s the worst spike can do?

“HEYA YA FREAK! YA OUGHTA LIVE IN THE EVERFREE WERE YA BALONG” He bellows toward me, standing some 20 feet away. His yells draw attention toward himself and then to his focus. I feel myself grow small as a large majority of the ponies around find themselves looking at me, some with pity due to his insult, few with agreement of the hick, and the rest not sure what to make of the situation. I know what to make of it as I start to feel sick, wanting to be anywhere but where I am now. Me and Spike hurry our pace away from the ponies, his yelling still audible, “YER A MONSTER! JUS LOOK AT YERSELF!”

Just punch him once, I promise he’ll leave you alone, or use spike as a flamethrower.

“Fucking prick is what he is, I’m sick of this attention, I’m sick of the fucking collar, and I’m FUCKING SICK OF FEELING SICK!” I let my anger get the best of me completely losing my composure. My outburst draws a few looks from around but the reaction that impacts me is Spikes, fear ridden across his features of such anger from me. It’s the first time I’ve lost myself here, also first time anypony has seen it as well. Spike turns his head away from me, his mood changed to a timid version of before.

Ok, so twilight was right, if he doesn’t release his magic it builds up, and based on what I’m seeing leaks out of him.

Before she can pour mine I stop her, “I’m sorry I don’t like tea, could you get me some water?” She nods and takes my cup to the kitchen pouring me a glass before coming back and setting it down on the table between us. I guess she isn’t so shy when she sees someone struggling, what a nice gal.

Fluttershy is definitely that grandmother that would bake you some chocolate chip cookies.

“Joey?” I stop just before the entrance still not looking her way. “I meant what I said earlier, you don’t owe us anything. Me and the girls are here for you and your our friend, we care about you” Her last words hitting home. If I stayed and talked I’m sure I wouldn’t be able to keep myself from breaking down, today’s earlier fuck ups evidence of my fragile state.

“I’ll remember that Shy.... and thanks-“ I turn toward her closing my eyes to hide the tears brimming in my eyes, “-for p-putting up with me” and I give my best smile.

Aw man, I wish he would have stayed to talk to fluttershy.

I chuckle thinking of my return fire, the same attack that landed me my tackle the day after the incident. I had the help of Pinkie Pie who was kind enough to lend me some party steamers, balloons, and some colorful lettering for me to spell out the punchline. I’d left the trap in Twilights library after close one night and invited her over for a “gift” to show my appreciation. Her face was priceless as the words just below the ceiling hanging on a beam read ‘proud you came out!’ with me standing just below blowing my party horn, hands raised to the sky. I rub my upper arm thinking back to how much of a beating she put on it after.

That’s messed up, but funny at the same time.

She loses it now bawling as she leaps into my side crying. This is like the third time I’ve made this innocent pony cry, she didn’t do anything wrong this time!

Third?

“I’m really sorry Twi, I really really am” I say just above a whisper. “If somethings really wrong... I promise I’ll tell you” She looks up from my side to face me.

Something tells me he’s gonna break that promise.

‘In payment of the damages done upon the endangered human, he is hereby granted citizenship in Equestria and given the deed of one property along the outskirts of Ponyville, just along the Everfree. Included with these gifts, a steady payment of 700 bits per month shall also be provided’

What damages?

Also, the comment is a lot shorter believe it or not.

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Lmao love your comment,
The magic load was meant to be dirty for you dirty boys and gals out there
Spike as a flamethrower is genius!
Fluttershy is that grandma, also I wanted the man to stay as well but he was cracking like an egg. That pony would have the tears flowing out of him if he didn’t bail, but we will get more shy later....
I don’t think it was actually the third time, our boy Joey was guessing
Damages were inflicted on him, he’s a leaky boy now cuz of Twi
It is shorter lol, thanks for reading Pete! Your this stories mvf, most valuable follower

Also I wanna add I’m really glad people seem to be enjoying this generally, I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing yet it’s apparently okay

So far I'm really digging this. Keep up the good work! Can't wait to see how this story evolves.

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Thank you and so far you are doing good. Although, it would be a good idea to plan what you are doing.

Yeah, this is getting more interesting now. The 'bad magic' is starting to take a toll on him.

Spike is right, Joe is the one forcing sexual context on everything....

“700 bits a month? You’ll easily pay rent with that and have plenty to spend!” Spike says grabbing the letter into his own hands to read again.

Maybe this is Spike’s naïveté, but I don’t think he needs to pay rent if he’s been gifted a deed.

MC’s having some wacky mood swings and irrational ruminations.

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Ah shit lol, I think I wanted Celestia to gift him the property but for Ponyville to have some sort of monthly tax for town expenses but clearly I didn’t explain that nor fix what I originally wrote. Given Equestrias weird lore in the actual show it seems kinda fitting for their society to have lots of socialist policies so I figured a monthly tax would be paid by their citizens to afford the towns holidays and such. Now I’m not trying to say anything political with this statement lol but generally the idea of a socialist minded government sorta fits the “imaginative utopia” a cartoon would carry.

I don’t know why I went so in depth with my answer but, the point is +2 points for you, ya found a mistake and no I will not change it. It’s adorable to see the mistakes of my early writing and I want them to stay so I can reread and see my growth.

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I’m not exactly on the chapter when reading your comment but I’m sure this was a statement from Pinkie therefore a little goof to show her 4th wall breaking. As for the collar, my friend if you genuinely believe wearing a collar in public is not humiliating I’d say you are in the minority. I think personally I’d prefer dying than ever wearing one, let alone in public.

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I have no idea what you’re referring to lol. I haven’t watched the show completely through and most of it is foggy on my memory. If she did indeed go to a restaurant named after ‘donut joe’ in the show, just assume in this universe that never happened. There are some differences between the show and my story, especially my ending.

Thanks for the comments and I hope you have a wonderful day from whenever you read this :)