• Published 5th Apr 2020
  • 1,427 Views, 4 Comments

Rainbow Dash's Epic Prank - clopopatra



What does she have planned? Surely, not mind control.

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13
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Comments ( 4 )

I'm sure they enjoy the fact I'm bombarding them from three separate accounts.

You have three separate accounts?

on my god rainbow

her face looks like the grinch in the original animated "how the grinch stole chrismas" movie

This is your official review from Dirty Little Secret's Dirty Little Contest!
Remember to vote in the contest's poll -- voting closes at midnight, June 6th.
And make sure to allow notifications from the contest group and/or follow Dirty Little Secret to get the full results and the awards show post on June 9th!

------ Review ------

Please keep in mind, I know I can be overly critical and negative at times. I can always find something to nitpick, even in the greatest works of literature ever written. Please don't take it personally!
-It's a fun concept and had a lot of potential.
-out of his sheathe. -- spelling.
-Very fast and rushed.
-Why didn’t Rainbow stay around to watch her prank go down?
-This story could have been way, way more than it ended up being.
-The mind-controlled ponies were kind of just meat puppets, which takes the emotion out of it.
-Well you can imagine what they did after that. -- real cop-out.
-There was nothing really to indicate that these two wouldn’t want to have sex with each other without being mind-controlled.
-Really needs an aftermath scene where the potion wears off and they realize what they did.
-Interesting giving the stallion poor stamina.

------ Scores ------

To clarify what these scores mean, check my judging rubric.
Cloppability: 65/100
Allure: 30/100
Enticement: 30/100
Immersion: 80/100
Prose Quality: 89/100
Total Score: 294/500
The more specialized scores for individual prizes, as well as the results of the community poll, will be published when the full results are announced. If this story wins any awards, there will be another post in the story comments sometime after June 9th announcing that this story has won.

Thank you for participating, and thank you for contributing to Fimfic's collection of clop!

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