• Published 16th Oct 2019
  • 3,044 Views, 194 Comments

Rainbow Dash, Please Report to the Principal's Office - TheGuineaPig45

Rainbow Dash has been sent to the principal's office, yet nobody knows why. As theories emerge and gossip spreads through the halls, the CHS student body spirals into chaos searching for one thing: the truth.

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2: Speculation

To: Rarity
From: Applejack

I cannot believe the nerve of that girl! Spreading a rumor across campus that Rainbow Dash and Principal Celestia are dating? That's worse than a rotten apple at the bottom of a barrel! I know Trixie wants attention, but she's just spreading lies! That ain't right at all! I'm gonna talk to her at lunch and hopefully knock some sense into her head. Our Rainbow Dash would never do sumthin like that!

Speaking of, have you heard anything from Rainbow? I tried calling her after school, but she didn't pick up! All she sent was a text message saying, "Too busy with work." Since when does she do her homework immediately? She LOVES procrastinating! Whatever's going on in her office meetings is doing something to her. I hope she opens up soon. Wouldn't want this to get blown even further out of proportion.

To: Silver Spoon
From: Diamond Tiara

Surprise, surprise, Rainbow Dash just got called to the principal's office again! That's, like, the seventh time this week. Seriously, is she okay? She's still here at CHS, which means I don't have to start a lawsuit yet, but I've got my father on speed-dial, just in case.

I don't really subscribe to Trixie's idea that Rainbow and Celestia are dating, cause like, ew, that's gross. Isn't Principal Celestia old enough to be her mom? No, I think Rainbow Dash pulled one of her stupid pranks on Mr. Doodle, and now she's paying the consequences for it. Probably put gum on his chair or something. Probably have to have a whole set of meetings about it with her parents. Drama. Honestly, I'm amazed she's not, like, suspended. With how much time she spends in that office and NOT in class, she might as well be.

By the way, I put Apple Bloom on the guest list, but that might mean I have to bump someone. Any suggestions? I was thinking Pipsqueak, but he's kinda cute. Whatever. Just tell me what you think.

To: Flash Sentry
From: Sandalwood

Yo, this is crazy. Ever since the hubbub started yesterday, Micro Chips has been collecting data, and it turns out, Celestia has called Rainbow Dash to her office at 9:35 A.M. twice now. He says a pattern is forming! Isn't that exciting? Obviously, he still has to collect and analyze more information before he can draw a definitive conclusion, but bro, I've never felt more alive. Maybe I'm a gossip junkie? Or a finding-the-truth junkie? Doesn't matter. My aura has changed into this like, happy, yellow, light. I still don't understand why we care about what Rainbow Dash is doing in the principal's office, but man do I wanna find out!

To: Lyra Heartstrings
From: Bon Bon

Everyone in History class was buzzing today with theories about Rainbow Dash and Principal Celestia. Some people think she's gotten a sports scholarship and is leaving for a new school next semester. Others think she's serving a punishment for some prank-gone-wrong. And then there's Trixie. Oh, Trixie. I don't think many people are taking her suggestion seriously, but they're definitely listening to it! I mean, how could they not? It's all she talks about!

Personally, I think this is Rainbow Dash's personal business, so I'm just gonna steer clear of the drama and wait until this all blows over. I overheard some of our other classmates, though, and they're talking about actively going out to find the truth. What that means, I'm not sure, but it sounds like they're gonna get in trouble.

Oh, yeah, we spent our entire class on Rainbow Dash, so we forgot to take notes for History. You think I could maybe borrow your notes?

To: Fluttershy
From: Pinkie Pie


Rainbow Dash has been in Principal Celestia's office for over an hour now! This calls for Operation: Breakout! You grab the grappling hook, I'll grab the balloons, and we'll meet at the water fountain in ten minutes! We're gonna free Rainbow Dash from her prison! Oh, and don't forget the brownie batter or the inflatable boat!

To: Silver Spoon
From: Diamond Tiara

Why weren't you at lunch today? You missed so much!

Mr. Cranky Doodle was on lunch duty today, and Wallflower Blush went up to him directly and asked if Rainbow Dash was in the principal's office because of something she did to him! You know how gutsy that was? Honestly, she's, like, my hero now! And I didn't even know she existed before today! Unfortunately, Mr. Doodle said no and went off on a whole rant about "the dangers of gossip," blah, blah, blah, all that stuff we heard in the social media safety assembly last month. So, turns out I was wrong and it wasn't a prank, but that doesn't mean I'm not worried she's going to get expelled at the end of this! I have my lawyers ready!

Oh, but the best part of lunch was Applejack giving Trixie a verbal beatdown! Her dumb theory was, well, dumb, and boy, did Applejack let her know it. Of course, she did it with country sweetness and brutal honesty. That girl doesn't sugarcoat anything! Unfortunately, Mr. Doodle intervened and ruined the experience, but it was a sight to see, and Trixie definitely got the message.

By the way, I'm bumping Snails from the party. Hopefully that doesn't bother Snips too much!

Message me back soon!

To: Sunset Shimmer
From: Trixie Lulamoon

Sunset, please! Accept my sincerest of apologies! I didn't mean to spread that rumor throughout the whole school! Well, maybe I did, but now I feel nothing but remorse. I had no intention of stirring up trouble, really! The attention and fame was just calling to me, and I totally forgot how my actions can have consequences. Imagine if what I said had left the school! Rainbow, Celestia, and I all could've gotten in trouble! I'm just glad neither of them caught wind of it. I promise, I'll never do something like this ever again. Hopefully, you forgive me and we can just forget this ever happened.

Message me back whenever you're ready, friend.

To: Flash Sentry
From: Sandalwood

Bro, Rainbow Dash didn't go to a single afternoon class! Whatever she's doing in the principal's office is taking up ALL of her time. Now that we know she didn't prank Mr. Doodle and Trixie's idea has been shut down, the leading theory is that she's gotten some kind of sports scholarship that's going to take her away from CHS. Captain Planet thinks she's going to Crystal Prep! Wouldn't that be a sick twist of fate?

By the way, Micro Chips needs some help collecting a certain kind of data. Any chance you know how to get in contact with the Dazzlings?

To: Fluttershy
From: Pinkie Pie

FLUTTERSHY! I've got the balloons, and I'm at the water fountain! WHERE ARE YOU?