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1: Observation1,211 words
2: Speculation1,148 words
3: Experimentation1,200 words
4: Frustration1,326 words
5: Relaxation1,337 words
6: Preparation1,015 words
7: Commotion1,005 words
8: Revelation1,260 words
9: Repercussion1,783 words
10: Discussion3,180 words
11: Adaptation1,740 words
12: Proposition1,215 words
13: Please Report to the Principal's Office (I)2,095 words
14: Please Report to the Principal's Office (II)1,165 words
15: Please Report to the Principal's Office (III)1,725 words
16: Conclusion1,650 words

13: Please Report to the Principal's Office (I)

To: Vice Principal Luna
From: Principal Celestia

Goodness, sister. The crazy train just got even crazier.

I shouldn't be surprised. After all, none of our students showed up for school yesterday. Obviously, something was wrong! Still, I had hoped this drama would subside, and that we would soon return to some form of normalcy. Unfortunately, that does not appear to be the case.

Last night, I got a call from the Canterlot Police Department. Apparently, our entire student body had broken into the school and were now in holding cells. Yeah. That was quite the pleasant surprise. After an hour of phone calls, emails, and texts, I finally managed to release everyone, but only on the condition that I use my authority as principal to dole out some sort of punishment. Yes. Another pleasant surprise.

Uggggghhhhhh. You know me, Luna. I hate punishing my pupils, but this time, it might be our only option. So, instead of having a regular school day (honestly, is that even possible at this point), I'm calling each student down to my office, one by one, to explain their side of the story. Hopefully, their personal accounts will help me piece together what really happened last night, and from there, we can figure out a fair punishment. Oh, and since you're sick at home today, I'm going to record each student's confession. That way, we can go over them together after school.

Alright, I need to go. Sandalwood just arrived, and I'm sure his confession will be quite... interesting.

Recording of SANDALWOOD
Last night was absolutely radical, dude! Oh, sorry, Principal Celestia. Didn't mean to call you "dude". It's a force of habit.
Anyways, last night was the best. I ate Chocolate Coated Caramel Crispy Cookies, hung out with my best friend in the entire world, and got to bask in the totally righteous energy of my peers! Sure, there were a couple of mishaps, but nothing spirit-breaking, y'know? Everything worked out in the end. Kind of. Not really. I had fun, at least.
Oh, you want specifics? Well, breaking into the school was really easy. As soon as the janitors left, Applejack busted through the doors with her super strength, and Trixie taught us how to block the motion detectors with nothing but a sheet of paper. Seriously, it was that simple. If you ask me, the school's security system needs a real upgrade. You know how many Equestrian magic threats we've had to face over the past few years? At least five! You think we would've learned by now...
Okay, just the facts from here on out, I promise. Once everyone was inside, Twilight briefed us on how the night was supposed to play out. I'll admit, I wasn't really paying attention to that part, but it sounded like she had everything under control. After that, we split into different groups and started filming.
And that's when MICRO CHIPS returned! Dude, you have no idea how much I missed him! Life just wasn't the same without his awkward, geeky presence. I had nobody to talk to, nobody to play hacky sack with, nobody to— Right. Back on topic. Um, the rest of my night was pretty devoted to him. We ate cookies together, filmed some scenes for the video, talked about the meaning of life... y'know, general guy stuff.
Everything that followed is a blur. I remember sitting in a circle with the rest of the Wonder-cult, hearing the fire alarm, and then getting put into handcuffs. That's about it. Micro Chips was definitely the highlight for me.
Overall, last night was a quality group hang... at least, until the police showed up. We didn't get to finish the video, but we really tried our best. And that has to count for something, right?
By the way, if you see Diamond Tiara, tell her that I still have her phone. Thanks!

Recording of TWILIGHT SPARKLE
Principal Celestia, thank you for taking the time to meet with the student body before deciding your punishment. I'm sure that once you hear our side of the story, you'll understand that we had the best of intentions, even if our actions were somewhat... ill-informed.
That being said, I would like to officially state that I was against the idea of trespassing on school grounds. Nobody listened to my opposition, of course, but I can assure you that I tried very hard to discourage the Wondercolts from their flawed course of action. Once we were already inside the school, however... I'll admit that I was complaisant.
As the project's assistant director, I was in charge of designing a comprehensive shooting schedule that allowed us to film the original script, record about a hundred student speeches, and do some reshoots, all before sunrise. A challenge, for sure, but nothing I couldn't handle. After about twenty minutes of isolation, concentration, and superb organization, I created what Sandalwood dubbed "the most beautiful tri-fold he'd ever seen". And I have to agree; it was certainly some of my best work. Color-coated, even!
With my amazingly crafted plan, I had assumed the night would be smooth sailing. Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. After being on track for twenty-three minutes, everything started to go awry. First, Flash Sentry went missing, which was especially bad because he had only filmed one of his three scheduled scenes! Then, Rarity locked herself in the costume closet, which meant another three scenes were suddenly on hold. And, for the cherry on top, it started raining, which meant that every scene on the field had to be moved somewhere else! It was a logistical NIGHTMARE!
Now, at this point, some might say that I started "Twilight-ing". However, I believe that my "freakout" was totally justified, especially given the circumstances. What? Of course, I know that my eye is twitching! What about it?! I'm fine! Trust me! I. AM. FINE!
Ahem. Sorry about that. Lost control of my emotions for a second. Anyways, I wasn't about to let a couple of mishaps ruin our night, so I sent out a search party to look for Flash, while Pinkie Pie worked on freeing Rarity. After two or three other quick fixes, it seemed like everything would be okay again... until Spoiled Rich arrived. Then, it was utter chaos.
Ughhhh! Last night was so FRUSTRATING! My schedule was so perfect, but we barely even got halfway through it! Our emergency team meeting took up sooooo much time, and then the fire alarm screwed everything up! It was supposed to be simple! It was supposed to be easy! And, instead, it was MADNESS! How come my plans never work?! They NEVER work! Am I not as organized as I should be?! Am I just not adaptable enough?! Gosh, I'm supposed to be GOOD at this! This is what I do! This is my role! Celestia, tell me, please! Am I good at this? AM I GOOD AT THIS?!
Hmm. You know what? I might need a minute to calm down. Um, good talk. I'll, uh, just send in the next person, if that's alright with you...

Recording of LYRA HEARTSTRINGS
Last night? Oh, I don't think I'll have very much to add. See, I was late because Bon Bon and I were helping Micro Chips sneak out of his hou— I mean, we were doing something else... that was... not that. Whew. Saved it.
Okay, fine! Micro Chips was grounded, and we really needed an editor for the video! And since there's parental controls on his laptop now, we needed to get him to the computers in the library! I promise, there was no breaking and entering. Everything was done from the outside! Pinkie Pie has this really neat trick with a brownie batter and an inflatable bo— Wait. Forget I said Pinkie Pie's name. She wasn't there. It was just me. And Bon Bon. And definitely not Fluttershy!
...Crud. Can I start over? Maybe you could delete this recording and— No? But the police never caught wind of how we broke out Micro Chips, so we were hoping that— Still no? Drat.
Oh well. Even though we got caught, it was definitely worth it. Sandalwood called us "heroes" for delivering Micro Chips, and that felt really, really good. I guess, if there's anything I've learned from this whole scandal, it's that you don't need to do big things — like exposing a certain someone's secret to the whole school — to be a "hero" and help out your friends. Sometimes, it's the smaller things — sharing your History notes, putting salami in someone's cart, reuniting best friends, dedicating a video to a deceased family member — that truly count and make all the difference. Regardless of whatever punishment comes our way, I'm glad I had this experience to teach me that.
Hey, are you sure I can't restart? Because I thought of a really good quote about friendship that I think would elevate my message to— No? Fine.

Recording of TRIXIE LULAMOON
Tell you what really happened? Absolutely NOT! The Great and Powerful Trixie refuses to expose her friends in such a manner! Her willpower is stronger than an ox, and her mind is locked up tighter than a safe! No secret shall ever come out of he— What's that? You'll contact my father if I don't comply? Never mind! The Honest and Informative Trixie shall tell all!
As a magician, I know all about the art of improvisation. See, when you're on stage, there's a lot that could go wrong. Audiences could boo. Rabbits could get stuck in their hats. People could actually get sawed in half. And when that happens, you can choose to either run away and never look back, or to simply seize the opportunity. As long as you play to your strengths and refuse to show weakness, you can always save the performance.
And that's exactly what I did. When I heard that Flash and Rarity had ruined Twilight's perfectly-crafted schedule, I knew that the Great and Powerful moi had to step in. See, the Rainbooms and Flash Drive were supposed to perform in the video, but with both bands missing important members, that was impossible. So, naturally, I volunteered to play in their place! That's right — one-hit wonder Trixie and the Illusions, back for one night only! It was going to be GREAT, POWERFUL, and MARVELOUS!
At least, if director Diamond Tiara had approved it. She was concerned about my song's lyrical content. While Better Than Ever and Cheer You On were songs about friendship and supporting one another, she called Tricks Up My Sleeve a "self-righteous slew of brags and unfounded cattiness". Can you believe that? The girl who incited a school-wide riot called me catty! Really, I felt like sawing her in half, but since I wanted the night to be drama-free for Rainbow Dash's sake, I just stepped away and moped in the girl's bathroom. Much better use of that negative energy.
Only, I lost track of time. Turns out, I was moping for an entire hour, and was about to miss my most important scene! I bolted out of the bathroom as fast as I could, but instead of finding the film crew, I found a bunch of police officers! Trixie was TERRIFIED! Without thinking, I screamed, threw ten smoke bombs, and ran the other way.
Unfortunately, I don't think the smoke detectors liked that. Normally, when I throw one smoke bomb, nothing happens. But since I had thrown ten at once, the fire alarm started blaring and the sprinklers turned on and everyone started screaming and— It was a mess. Believe me, Trixie was only trying to help! But instead of seizing the opportunity and improvising, she ran away and didn't look back.
Blegh. Now I'm getting all emotional! Darn it! Look, I know I'm not the only person who messed up the video project, but I still feel awful. This was supposed to help Rainbow Dash... to bring everyone together... to prove that we're still proud Wondercolts, but now... it's just another in a long string of failures. We wanted to fix everything, but maybe we can't. Maybe this is how our lives are gonna be from now on. We're just destined to screw up, over and over again...
Ugh. Now the waterworks are coming. The Raw and Emotional Trixie needs to excuse herself. Sorry.

Recording of ZEPHYR BREEZE
What?! Breaking into the school? Who could ever possibly do that?! Not I, that's for sure! And if you want an alibi, I've got one! Just gotta think of it...

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FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #1 · Aug 18th, 2020 · 3 · ·

How come my plans never work?! They NEVER work!

No plan survives contact with the enemy, Twilight, and reality is always the enemy.

It'll certainly be interesting to see what other perspectives can offer for the past disaster. If nothing else, Celestia can take comfort in knowing her students' hearts were in the right places. Their brains, on the other hand...

Mpony1