Well, it’s that time again. Hearth’s Warming Eve. The time where fillies and colts are playing in the snow, coming up with all sorts of creative games and activities.
And then… well, there’s you.
Welcome to your life, Anonymous. You are a human living in a world full of colorful cartoon equines, and it’s been that way for nearly two years now. But right now, all you care about is getting yourself warm.
The middle of winter is the most unforgiving thing about this world. While ponies have fur in addition to their winter garb, you’re stuck with your bare skin and bed sheets, as the local boutique owner, Rarity, would not allow you to have simple cloth to cover yourself, and instead came up with the most artistic, decorative designed pajamas you had ever laid eyes on.
Nope. Not gonna wear those to bed. Mostly because of the booties she conveniently placed on them; you’d never be caught dead wearing that… thing.
The only sources of heat in your house at the current time are the fireplace, and the stove. Neither of which are in your room, of course, and since these ponies have no idea what insulation is, you’re stuck with just drywall and thin bed sheets to keep you warm during the winter.
Your ears perk up when you hear a faint tapping on your window. You cock your head to the right, to see Fluttershy’s head bobbing up and down as she floats outside.
You remember your first interactions with her; you’ve been doing your best to keep them suppressed, but when she comes to your house every day, it’s hard. Because of said interactions, you’ve given her the nickname “Fucking Flutterslut”, though you tend to have the patience to deal with her on a daily basis, as long as it’s only a few minutes at a time.
Since it’s just the window, you sit up and walk over to it. She gets this big grin on her face, like she expects you to open it and let her in. Hah, fuck that. You close your curtains, and then slink across the floor and into the comfort of your bed once again.
And then, there’s a knock at the door.
“Um, Anon… you’ve been cooped up in your house all day, and it’s nearly noon… you must be freezing in there all alone…”
Damn. You didn’t get a wink of sleep last night because of the freezing temperatures at night, so your patience isn’t nearly as formidable as it usually is.
The knocking… the infernal knocking, it rings through your eardrums with the panging sound like your grandmother’s old clock that would always echo through her house every hour…
Fuck it. You throw the sheets off of you, and walk over to the door, still in your boxers. This cold can really just kiss your ass right now; you have other problems to focus on.
You look out the door’s small window, and see that the snow’s piled up at least two or three feet, so much so that Fluttershy has to flap her wings just to stay above the snow. You grunt angrily, slamming your fist against the wall in frustration. You were planning on going out to buy some food later that day, looks like that plan’s wasted…
Your train of thought is interrupted when you hear a squeak come from outside, followed by a sloshing noise almost immediately after. You peek through the small window and see that a pile of snow has fallen off your roof, covering her completely in a huge mound of white snow. The only thing you see are her eyes, and even then they’re fairly camouflaged well by the snow.
Hell, if you weren’t so concerned with her trying to satisfy her xenophiliac desires, you’d think it was adorable.
You can’t contain yourself; you let out a loud guffaw before walking away from the door, your laughs muffled by the door and the snow covering her ears. You decide that today, you weren’t going to freeze your ass off, so you head over to the fireplace, lighting it and placing a few spare logs onto it every so often to warm up. Just as you start feeling the ice melting away from your shoulders, you hear a second knocking at your door…
“Not now, Fluttershy; I’m not in the mood today.”
“Leaving me out in the cold like that?” you hear another, very familiar female’s voice come from outside, “That’s no way to treat a bro!”
Ah, Rainbow Dash. Always coming to your rescue when you least expect it. She was the first one to find you when you arrived in this world, and she’s been the closest friend you could ever imagine since. Whether it’s movies, drinking cider, exercising… she’s always been there for you. You never thought a girl could be such a bro to you, but she proved that theory to be completely false; you’ve even started to replace her name, calling her “Rainbro” as a testament to her bro-ness.
You quickly sprint over to the door, opening it just in time to see Fluttershy scurrying off into a nearby bush. Whenever Rainbro’s with you, it seems Flutterslut tends to keep her distance. Might be because she doesn’t want to destroy the friendship the two of them share, what with the Elements of Harmony and all that you found out about.
Rainbro speeds out of the cold and into the house, and by the time you manage to close the door, she’s shaking the snow off her fur and mane and sitting up next to the fireplace, warming herself. You walk over to her and grin.
“Did you bring the stuff?”
“Fuck yeah, I brought the stuff!” she exclaims, patting her saddlebag. You’ve noticed that your occasional language has rubbed off on her. That, or she’s just trying to act tough to be cool around you. Either way, you don’t mind. She’s still your bro, after all.
“So, which movie first?” she asks, dropping the saddlebag on the ground, various movie cases spilling out of it, along with a few bottles of a special brew the two of you share a like interest for: Applejack Daniels, brewed secretly by the Apples themselves just for you two.
You immediately go through the stash of movies she brought, picking out a high-speed action movie first and pressing it into the television. With help from yourself, the local inventor was able to come up with the first basic television set in all of Equestria, though it’s still black and white and doesn’t get a signal for anything, so you just use it for movies that you had stashed back on Earth that came with you when you arrived. The two of you proceed to crash down onto your couch, and you reach over for a blanket.
“You want in?”
You give the blanket a swift flick to spread it out flat over you, and you look over at Rainbro.
She has the strangest expression on her face. A mix of embarrassment and… what’s up with her wings?
“Um, no thanks,” she says, smiling and handing you a bottle of Applejack Daniels. “I’m fine.”
You shrug; hey, if she doesn’t want in, more blanket for you then.
The two of you continue to play movie after movie, chugging down bottle after bottle of Applejack Daniels. Eventually, you’re on what you believe is your third bottle; you lost count at twelve. Rainbro’s fast asleep, sprawled out on the couch, her head resting on your thigh. You smile, and throw part of the blanket over her to keep her warm; she’s your bro, after all. Can’t let a bro go to sleep in the freezing cold.
The movie marathon ends, and both of you are passed out, opened movie cases and bottles of Applejack Daniels littering the floor in a minefield-like array leading between the couch and the television set.
playandroid.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Me-Gusta.png
1081053
Oh my...
What title made me think of.
images3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb57524/streetfighter/images/f/fe/Guile-sonicboom-artwork.png
Because who would want to read about fucking pastel coloured horses...heh heh heh......heh
So. Huh.
Not entirely sure what I just read, but I'll be watching to see where this goes.
Yes, because clicking a check box next to the words View Mature isn't nearly direct enough in its implications.
This has potential.
This story.
Yes.
Go on.
1081322
The sarcasm is not strong in this one...
...Or it is, and I'm just not noticing it because text.
Hating on Fluttershy
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lvrcr4fIBT1qibz0jo1_1280.jpg
1081595 Sarcastic writer is sarcastic.
"Fucking Flutterslut"
I'm sorry, but DAFUQ DID YOU JUST CALL MY DAUGHTER!?
Keep being a badd ass writer bro.
1083113
I'm sure that if she tried to get into your pants every waking moment of every day against your better wishes, simply to satisfy her xenophiliac fetishes, you'd feel the same way.
Besides, I'm sure you wouldn't want to have sex with your "daughter", now would you?
Sonic Boom - Sonic CD
1083221
Favorite comment all day. You have no idea how many people did that when I first posted this story in its original greentext format. You made me nostalgia all over the place, sir/madame. Well done.
1083196 dude i wouldnt give a damn if she wanted to get in my pants all the time in fact i would be in heaven but fluttershy is close second of the mane 6 for me rainbro #1 all the fucking way bro
1086159
I believe I have a picture to summarize this somewhere... Ah, here it is.
i.imgur.com/bqdVX.jpg
1086173 i still stand by my previous statement and can i ask do you actually hate fluttershy or not
1086223
Don't take the story's main character as my own personal opinion. Though Anonymous doesn't enjoy Fluttershy's antics, that doesn't necessarily mean he hates her. That, in and of itself, shouldn't connect to me as whether or not I hate Fluttershy.
TL;DR: My personal opinions shouldn't matter as long as the story plays out as planned.
1086249 i meant do you personally hate her or not (sorry thats just what i was thinking at said time)
1086263
That's what I'm saying; I don't want people to know my opinions on the different ponies, because then it would easily skew the reactions they get when reading my story.
Not to mention that all of the Fluttershy fanatics would go insane if I said either way. "OH NO YOU DON'T LIKE FLUTTERSHY YOUR STORY IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD" or "OMG Y U TREAT HER SO BADLY IF YOU LIKE HER?!"
Either way, it's a lose-lose for me in this situation. Stay tuned; I may reveal my opinions later on.
1086281 thats ok them mate..........................oh and by the way.................................iim watching you
1081053 Dude. That's me...
<----
Also, Good Chapter, now post more before I rip out your fucking throat and piss on your lungs.
1086972 why you no post that before me then
1087022 When I finished reading the chapter, your mark had already been left. I forgive you of your transgression, but consider this to be a warning. If I ever, EVER, find mine mark in thy name, I shall smite you. Your name shall be forgotten in the realms of FiMFiction, and your presence will be erased. This is my final warning to you.
Don't know why I'm writing here (drunk, 6th beer) but man do I like letters!
Also... erm... Good story? :D
Please don't hurt me...
Go on...
1087043playandroid.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Me-Gusta.png
1088202 Curses, my bluff failed.
1090046
To all who are asking me to continue this, I will direct you here.
This has all of the information you will need.
Eventually, you’re on what you believe is your third bottle; you lost count at twelve.
I loled hard
WE OBVIOUSLY NEED MOAR OF THIS. RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
1145812
Hehe! At 18,318 hits on my Pastebin as of right now; not much longer until I reach 20K and post the full prose!
Ready yourselves, it won't be long now... Not to mention I can use all of this extra time to read over and add more to it.
1146380
GOOD,
weknowmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/proceed-baby.jpg
Had 100 hits on my Pastebin today... Wow, that was a lot.
If this continues at its pace, you can expect to see the full story within... 15-16 days. I have it written up already, just adding things in now. And gaming. And working on -other- projects that I may or may not post on here as well when I finish.
I almost feel bad for posting this picture here... I mean REALLY bad... but...
i.imgur.com/4kEXv.png
I truly am a cocktease.
I suppose anon has good reason to not be very fond of this Fluttershy, yes?
1177449
Quite. Over the two years that he's been stuck here, she's consistently been trying to force him to have sex with her, due to some sick xenophiliac fetish she has for him.
I don't know about anyone else, but if someone was trying to force unwanted sex upon me, I'd not be too fond of them either.
Of course, this is explained later in the story (the part that is currently greentext), but it's far enough into the story to where I'm not going to bother converting it into prose. It's just too much work on my part.
1177595 I get it, and I support it. The idea of a female trying to sheath a guy without consent, no matter beauty or species or what-freaking-ever, makes me sick.
"The only thing you see are her eyes, and even then they’re fairly camouflaged well from the snow, save for her teal green eyes."
Redundance is redundant. You'll want to re-phrase that.
1177645
...Ack. I need to stop writing at 2AM... and then re-reading at 3AM... I'll get to that right away.
EDIT: There we go. Fixed it.
Update! I'm currently at 19.5K hits on my Pastebin! I estimate a week before I reach 20K, and then you will receive my gift to all of you.
A nice, d'aww inducing, feels building, jimmies rustling one-shot story of everyone's favorite bro, Rainbow Dash.
...Only it's not a one-shot. Because there's more to it than what I've got on FIMFiction.
your story sucks dick, kill yourself
1208899
Love you too, Chronicler. Still waiting for your part in our little collab...
i.imgur.com/3Pr9I.png
So close...
i.imgur.com/cF4FQ.png
And so, it begins. As promised, the full version of the first story I ever wrote on 4Chan.
Let the flood gates open.
Getting drunk with Dash? How much better of a night could you have???
Oh boy. More of this. For the first time in quite a while, I say: thank you 4chan. Thank you for this. Rainbro and Flutterapist are both hilarious.
Now onwards!