What Friends Are For
"Ah’ would say yer' ready, Rainbow Dash. No need tah’ go around asking everypony," Applejack assured. The farmhand's career ensured she would never be short of work, forcing her to multitask between advising Rainbow and bucking trees. "What’s the matter, sugarcube?"
"Nothing the matter; I just like hearing everypony tell me how awesome I am," Rainbow Dash shuffled a basket of apples for her friend. "Or maybe I just can't think about anything else!"
"Well that ah’ can believe! Nuff' with this ready stuff! Yer' fine! Now... let's talk bout’ something else."
"Have I told you what challenges and trails are like?"
"Ah’m sure yer' eager to share." Applejack tossed another basket for Rainbow to fill.
"Well... there are three trials; agility, speed, and flight reflexes."
"Ah’ bet yah got the speed one down," Applejack laughed.
"Are you kidding me AJ? I'm totally the fastest flier ever!"
"The others seem right in yer' alley as well."
"You better believe it! For agility I have a couple different routines and they all are super awesome! My favorite agility routine involves a front dive, five barrel rolls, a change of direction, two back flips, and finishing with a perfect landing. In under a minute!"
"Ah'd be darned if anypony could do that trick. But if anypony can, it's you Rainbow Dash."
"Hey thanks AJ!"
"Aw shucks, yer' welcome. No need ta’ thank me. They start soon, right?"
"Yeah... the first trial starts in five days, and I leave tomorrow. Each trial lasts about a day. I figure I can hang out around in Cloudsdale for a couple days before they start. Practice a little."
"Shucks Rainbow, sorry ah’ haven't been keeping in the swing of things. Too busy round' here," Applejack nudged her hoof against Rainbow's shoulder. "But ah'll be there fer’ you when you start the trials. Twilight is getting that spell ready."
"Yeah... I knew she wouldn't let me down."
"None of us would. That's why we're yer' friends!"
"That's just what I like to hear! Gimme a hoof!" The athlete's hoof impacted with the cowgirl's.
"Hay yeah!" Applejack cheered.
"I gotta get going AJ; I think I'm going to practice for the-" Rainbow traced her steps. "Tenth time today."
"Figures... keep at 'em gal. But ah’ got work to do, so ah’ll be here. Give em’ hay!”
Rainbow quickly waved her friend goodbye before quickly taking to flight. Acres of Applejack’s handiwork were on display under Dash’s wingspan. The parallels of Applejack’s strength, dedication, and will to her own forced Dash’s ego to burst.
Hmm... what next? What’s the game-plan for old Dash?
“I don’t know Dashie! Maybe you could go to Sugarcube Corner and have some tasty treats! If I were you, that’s what I would do! But if I were you, then you would be me, and I would also go to Sugarcube corner! What are we waiting for? Let’s go!” Only a very particular pink mare could conjure up such a sentence.
“Pinkie... what are you doing in that balloon, and did you read my thoughts?” The perplexed mare hovered next to her friend.
“No silly! I didn’t read your mind! I listened to it! Reading minds, well that would be just goofy! It makes me laugh!” Pinkie giggled as her air-balloon began to stop its forward motion.
“Whatever... hey, you know what? I’m free. We can hang out if you want. But I gotta go easy on the treats. Training and all, you know.”
“Easy on the sweets? That’s impossible! Not when I make them! Come on, we have cake to eat!”
The pranking pair quickly made their way to Sugarcube Corner in little time; Pinkie’s air-balloon was surprisingly fast. “Dashie... I’m so excited for you! A Wonderbolt? That is so awesome! You’re so awesome! Oh my gosh... this calls for a party!” Confetti erupted in various directions.
“Sure Pinkie... but let’s wait until after the trials, okay? Then we can party it up like nopony’s business.”
“Okie-dokie-lokie! I’ll start planning it now! Oh my gosh... Iit’s going to be the best thing ever! Bye Dashie! I have to get everything ready!” Pinkie took off and scurried about in circles; apparently creating plans for Dash’s future party.
“But I thought you wanted to hang out?” Dash bit into a donut.
“After Dashie! After-” Pinkie pieced together random party objects. “This has to be the best party ever, for the best Wonderbolt ever!”
“Well... okay... have fun I guess. I’ll just finish my donut and be outta here?”
“Sorry, I didn’t want you to leave Dashie! I can multitask!”
“Nah it’s okay. You got your hooves full... and I want an awesome party for when I become a Wonderbolt... so it’s cool! Keep at it!”
“Well, have all the sweets you want! They are super-duper-duper tasty!”
“Alright,” Dash reached for another donut for the flight home. “Thanks Pinkie. It’s always nice hanging out with you.”
“Totally Dashie! Rock on!”
“Well, I gotta get going... so I’ll see you at the trials?”
“Is that even a question silly? Of course!”
“Thanks Pinkie!”
“Your welcome!”
Rainbow opened the door of Sugarcube Corner after her brief visit; hoping to finally make her way back home.
It’s awesome that I have so much support. Friends like these... I’m lucky.
“Hey Rainbow Dash!”
Twilight? “Hey Twilight. What’s up?” Rainbow asked.
“I was just going to visit Pinkie. How are you doing? Lots of stuff coming up soon, huh?” Twilight investigated.
“Yeah. Lots. I keep running into all my friends today though. Which is awesome, don’t get me wrong.”
“Looks like you will have your hooves full, that’s for sure.” Twilight smiled.
"It’s better to have em’ full with a bunch of awesome stuff than to sit around all day!”
“That’s certainly true! I know how that goes! Being a star student isn’t always easy,” Twilight sympathized. “But in the end of the day, it’s always worth it.”
“Star student? More like professional egghead! But anyways, great talking with yah’!”
“Good luck practicing! I gotta go see Pinkie,” Twilight opened the door to Sugarcube Corner. “C’ya Rainbow Dash!”
“Later!” Rainbow spread her wings towards the direction of her cloud home. Nap time, maybe? The thought comforted the fatigued pegasus. Nap time it is.
“Hi Rainbow Dash,” Rainbow turned her attention to a familiar whisper. “How are you?”
“Hey Fluttershy! Wow! I am just running into everypony today!”
“Oh... I’m sorry. Should I get out of your way?” Fluttershy retracted her confidence.
“No way! Why don’t you fly with me a bit? I was just about to head home.”
“Sure Rainbow Dash,” Fluttershy agreed. “I’ll follow you.”
“Hmm...” Rainbow’s stomach growled. “Well, I just had some treats with Pinkie, but I’m hungry for a real meal. Wanna go grab lunch?”
“Sure Rainbow! Why don’t you come over to my cottage? I can make something... if you want.”
“Lead the way pal!” Rainbow cheered. Shy is an awesome friend and cook! I’m totally game! Lucky me!
“Okay Dash. Let’s go!” Fluttershy soared gently through the spring sky with her best friend following.
“Hey Fluttershy?”
“Yes Dash?”
“Check this out!” The daredevil outlined her cutie mark in her flight pattern.
“Yeah well,” Fluttershy carefully traced her friends aerial artwork to her best ability. “Check that out!”
“When were you competitive? Oh, you are on!” Rainbow performed a full rotation around Fluttershy mid flight in a playful manner; displaying no effort to contain her giggles.
Fluttershy broke her flight whilst Rainbow continued forward.
“Hey Fluttershy, why are you stopping? Too afraid you can’t keep up! It’s okay, nopony can!” Rainbow hovered next to her friend.
“Oh... I’m just tired Rainbow.”
“Hey I’m sorry Fluttershy. I should have known.”
“Really Rainbow? Cause,” Fluttershy pushed forward, gaining a several second head-start. “I just tricked you!”
“I’m totally not sorry now! You’re on!” Rainbow easily bypassed her friend’s limited flight abilities. After she held her first place for several seconds, Dash paced her wingbeat to allow Fluttershy to keep up.
Fluttershy nudged her hoof against Rainbow’s shoulder. “Dash, we’re already there silly!”
“You know, I was getting so distracted there! Too bad I totally wasted you!”
“You rock! Woo hoo!” Fluttershy descended to the ground and opened her front door to Rainbow.
“I know! After a stunt like that, I’m totally going to be ready! Everypony is going to shine me with diamonds and cheer! Crowds of thousands Fluttershy! It’s not your thing, I know. But I love attention!”
“How are you handling this? The training, the stress, everything I mean. I wouldn’t know what to do if I was in your hooves,” Fluttershy paused for a brief second. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m sure you are fine and all I’m doing is bring attention to myself. Just forget I said it.”
“Nah ‘Shy, it’s cool! Don’t worry! We can talk about this kinda stuff,” Rainbow wrapped her foreleg around Fluttershy. She’s an awesome friend; I can talk to her about being anxious. She’ll understand. Fluttershy is not a pony to judge or spread gossip.
“Oh... well then, would you mind talking about it?”
“Yeah. You know, I have been feeling really anxious. Remember the Young Flier’s Competition? When I totally freaked out before? Double that.” Dash felt great comfort in the truth; especially in the presence of her understanding friend.
“It’s okay to feel that way Dash. But why are so anxious? I’m pretty sure the Wonderbolts would accept you already, even without the trials! They saw how awesome you were so many times; You saved Equestria and created a Sonic Rainboom! Actually, you know that Wonderbolt Soarin? He once told me how you saved his pie! I thought he was so silly, but he was really serious about it. And how you would make an awesome Wonderbolt!”
“Really?” Rainbow replied.
“He said he got a pie from a band of traveling pirates and he wanted you to make sure it didn’t drop. He said it was serious business. I’m not exactly sure what he meant but I can tell you with certainty that they really think highly of you.”
“I guess I have no reason to be all sissy with all this, do I?” Rainbow’s head fell in shame.
“Of course not Dash! Everypony feels anxious! It’s just part of life.” Fluttershy offered a foreleg to Dash, who proceed to quickly hug the mare.
“Well let’s get on those sandwiches! I’m hungry!”
A few minutes passed as Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash each made several sandwiches, enjoying the teamwork. Rainbow had created a game of it; the mare’s desire for competition never ceased, even in the menial task of food-preparation.
“Ready” Rainbow shuffled several ingredients and a knife forward.
“For this game? I think you’re a little silly Dash, but sure,” Fluttershy readied her utensils. “I’m always up for a game!”
“Go!” The mares quickly cut the vegetables and attempted to piece them together.
Fluttershy finished her sandwich several seconds before her cyan friend.“I won! Beat you Dash!”
“That makes us even! Now, let’s eat!” Rainbow bro-hoofed the animal caretaker.
“Could you please get us some drinks Dash?!”
Rainbow used her familiarity of her best friend’s house to instantly locate the magic powered chiller. She reached for a pitcher of water and poured two glasses; topping them off with several cubes of ice. “I’m on my way!”
“How about we skip on a game this time! I’m hungry,” Fluttershy laughed.
“Sounds good.” Rainbow took a seat next to her friend.
“So I’ll have to make you some signs for the trails. I’ll give one to all of the girls and we can cheer you on together. Woo hoo,” Fluttershy took a bite of her sandwich. “What should they say?”
Rainbow was quick to reply “Rainbow Dash is 20% cooler than you!”
“Sounds just like you Dash!”
“Anyways, thanks ‘Shy. I can’t say how awesome it is to have this much support. I know, when I’m flying and styling, I’ll have my friends right there cheering me on!”
“And we’ll be there when you’re a Wonderbolt too; you can count on it!”
“Remember when you talked down that Dragon ‘Shy? Like totally kicked his flank with your voice?”
Fluttershy grinned widely. “Oh, he just needed a little guidance. Not a bad dragon; he just made a bad decision.”
“Either way, you know what? You were so brave! You totally conquered your fears! That takes guts! And to top it off, you totally talked him down! Oh wait, I already told you that. But still!”
“I guess I have a way with animals. Big or small.”
“More like awesomeness! I think you are the only pony in history who stopped a dragon by yelling!”
“You learned a lesson as well,” Fluttershy focused her attention on Dash’s eyes. “Kicking a huge dragon is really silly!”
“Oh... I didn’t hit him that hard! If I went full-force, he would have cried out of that cave!” Dash teased.
Fluttershy finished her sandwich. “I’ll take your word for it, Best Young Flier.”
“Man... I’m full! That was awesome, by the way! Thanks for lunch!”
“Not a problem Dash.”
A loud yawn arose in the cyan mare. “Ugh... After all that flying, I better take a nap. I should get going.”
The animal caretaker offered a suggestion. “Why don’t you sleep here? I mean, I’ll stay out of your way. Plus, you won’t have to find a cloud. If that’s okay with you.”
“Sure! I mean, that’s fine right?” Dash said with a hint of uncertainty.
“Of course!”
“Well then, I’m off! Going to dream about winning! In a few days, I won’t have to dream anymore!”
‘I guess taking a nap at Fluttershy’s is no different from home. Plus, I can be sure she won’t wake me up; I can barely hear her when I’m awake!’
Rainbow took a seat on Fluttershy’s couch.
“I’ll be outside with the animals,” Fluttershy offered a pillow to the athlete. “Sleep tight.”
“You don’t need to ask! I’m exhausted!”
“Fluttershy darling? Are you there?” Rarity found her way inside the cottage.
“Oh, hi Rarity. How are you today? Are you here to drop off Opal?” Fluttershy greeted the fashionista with a hug.
“Yes. She needs the usual trim if that would be okay. I have tried, even in the way you have showed me, but she always claw me!”
“It’s not a problem Rarity! Come here Opal.” The cat quickly found herself in Fluttershy’s hooves, enjoying a tight snuggle.
“So what are you- oh, is that Rainbow Dash?”
“What’s up Rarity? I was just about to take a nap,” Rainbow kept to the couch, refusing to remove herself from the comfort to physically greet Rarity.
“Oh well, we wouldn't want to interupt your nap! I always hate it when ponies do that! “Fluttershy dear, why don’t leave Rainbow alone? She’s probably exhausted after such intense training. Come on, let’s go outside,” Rarity suggested, quickly nudging the shy mare outside.
“How short do you want Opal’s coat?” Fluttershy asked, oblivious to Rarity’s actions.
“Fluttershy, is there something you aren’t telling me?” Rarity smiled suggestively.
“Um... Well, last time I trimmed Opal, one spot wasn’t even. I’m sorry.”
Rarity facehooved. “No darling, about Rainbow Dash.”
“She was really tired and hungry?”
“Look Fluttershy,” Rarity realized that a blunt method would work the best for her shy friend. “Do you have feelings for her?”
“No... Well...” Fluttershy surveyed her surroundings and placed her muzzle next to Rarity’s ear, ready to whisper “Sort of, I mean, yes...”
“Oh I’m so happy for you! It’s great that you finally found a special somepony! But darling, aren’t you sad that she is leaving?”
“A little. But I’m so happy for her. And I know she will come back all the time. And why would she want me as a special somepony? It’s better that I don’t tell her. It will just make things complicated.”
“She looks really happy right now; don’t forget that. And I’m sure she would love you as a special somepony! Hey. I got an idea.”
“What is it Rarity,” Fluttershy took another look to ensure that nopony could listen.
“You should go with her to Cloudsdale. Be there for her while she trains. I know all of us will be there for the trials, but you could make sure she is never alone during the whole trip.”
“Actually, I might do that. Not for me, but I could make sure she’s not alone during training.” Fluttershy smiled at the suggestion.
“Smashing dear! I have several orders to fill, but don’t forget what we talked about. Have a pleasant time with your special somepony!” Rarity giggled as she left the cottage.
Several loud snores greeted Fluttershy as she entered her home. “Goodnight Dashie,” Fluttershy quietly shut the living room door, leaving a peaceful setting for the sleepy mare.
Special somepony? No... I might have a little crush, but I can’t do that to her. She’s got more important things to worry about than me.
The shy mare readied Opal for her grooming.
But I should go with her. I don’t want her to feel anxious for nothing. That’s what friends are for.
Stats
Page generated in 0.028 seconds
Total duration
714 users online
779,717 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Awwwww, Fluttershy's in love!
So cute! What a splendid idea for her to go along with Rainbow Dash for support. I mean, she went with her back to Cloudsdale to prepare for the competition, so it seems just about natural that she would go with her for this!
And it's true, Fluttershy really is that kind of pony you can talk to and actually feel comfortable in doing so, knowing she'll listen to you and won't judge you, but will tell you what you need to know, blunt as it may be sometimes. And Rainbow Dash can really use that kind of support network. Seriously, I hope season three will showcase this some more... But until then, we'll always have fanfics! 8D X3
Well done so far, yet again! I'm looking forward to what's to come.
1085261
Thank you! Yes, I agree, she does need that support line. Good thing she has friends like Fluttershy.
1085261 Flutterdash in the actual show would be EPIC, although, i don't know if they'd let a lesbian relationship on a children's show
1086631 I know how you feel. In my own personal bubble, I would be ECSTATIC. But to be realistic and in regards to canon, there's no way it's going to happen and frankly, it would be a bad idea in GENERAL to do ANY shipping within the Main Six.
I could go on forever about why, but I won't. The point is, it just wouldn't work.
But at least we'll have them as friends.
1086648 well, their ship would be a REALISTIC turn, if there was ANY romance, as the show has told us, they've know each other for a LONG time, and several other instances. Have you seen the video the pointed out they kissed (in the show)?
1086666 You're definitely not wrong about that! They're a great pairing and would be awesome together. And yes, I do know about the infamous kiss. X'D I made a little analysis about it.
1086799 this is my opinion about the ship appearing in the show;
chzbronies.files.wordpress.com/2012/08/my-little-pony-friendship-is-magic-brony-do-want-but-caint-has.jpg
1086827 XD I think that sums it up perfectly!
1086875 I shall has, NO MATTER WAT!
Just wondering... but does “I was just going to visit Pinkie. - from Twilight, when Pinkie had just ditched Rainbow Dash's company hint at anything between the two mares?
Very cute ending to the chapter. I liked Rarity's entrance and her prying... may the feelings develop
"Gimme five!" Five what? Fingers? Nooo...
Anyway, I like the story so far, and I will continue to read the chapters as they come out. The idea for Fluttershy to go along with Dashie was splendid as well. Keep up the good work.
And as always, FLUTTERDASH FTW
1087044
Well.. Gimme hoof is just weird... I'm not sure what to do with it.
1086977
Hmmmm... I wonder who had the idea of Rarity entering.
1086875
1086977
1087044
1086882
Any suggestions from my awesome readers? I'm not hearing much... And I'd really to hear suggestions... if that's okay with you
1087409 I'm sure to think of something... I'll pm you my thoughts...
1086977
About the TwiPie, it was actually conquisental, but it makes a lot of sense. Maybe there will be hints but I'm going to have Adventures focus on them
great story so far. Can't wait to see more! and remember to be a
STAR! 
1087409 I'll let you know if I do think of something! :3
1088270
Thanks! Any suggestions in writing style/format/ ect... Was it easy to read?
Thanks!! I know it's a lot to ask, but I want to keep getting these stories out to you guys in the best way possible... if that's okay with you
(I feel like I'm demanding, which makes me feel 
)
1088414 It's definitely easy to read, no worries about that! :3
1088264
I'm a lot of things, not sure a star is one of them
. Maybe a mixture of a nerdy socially awesome/awkward penguin? 
But thanks for your support! Check out my other stories if you are a FlutterDash fan
1088419
Don't be afraid to pick out any bad writing/mistakes. It would help me out a ton!
I might start on another Adventures Chapter tonight. We'll see what happens
1088449 Will do, good sir! You can count on me! I'll do what I can!
1088419
1087488
1087044
1086882
1088264
Did anyone get the spongebob reference here?
1088450
I like the story, but this is what the dialogue sounds like in my opinion...
Rainbow Dash: "Hey Fluttershy! What ya thinking 'bout?
Fluttershy: I dunno, animals n'stuff...
Again, i like the story but that got stuck in my head while I was reading.
1089638
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/247/233/b1a.jpg
If so, then I gotta work on the dialogue.
Hmph. I re-read the chapter looking for the Spongebob reference, and I couldn't find it.
I'm a failure at life. 
Although, if I had to guess... Is it the part with the traveling pirates? It seemed pretty random, but it could also just be Soarin' exaggerating the importance of his pie. Well, I noticed two mistakes while I was reading.
1) "Have I told you what the challenges and trails are like?"
- I assume it should be trials rather than trails.
2) "What is that Rarity,"
- The sentence should be "What is that, Rarity?" Since it is a question.
I think the dialogue is fine, so you don't really have to fix it. But then again, that's just my opinion, so it's up to you. Future suggestions... Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash travel through a time vortex to find they've been launched into the distant future where there is an epic pony war over Equestria! Yeah, as you can see, I've got nothing. If I do think of something, I'll tell you, but right now I can't think of anything. Oh well, I look forward to future updates.
And as always, FLUTTERDASH FTW
1090016
Yeah, it was with the pirates. Remember when Squidward buys an explosive pie for spongebob?
Thanks for your comment and I will fix the mistakes
This story so far looks great! Not too much to criticize. The dialogue was the biggest standout for me, it seemed... well, awkward. It seems as though you focus on the unimportant bits of a conversation, small talk and pleasantries, while skimming the important stuff.
“ 'Oh yeah, that’s right! The veggies in these sandwiches, you grew them didn’t you?'
'Yes. I have always enjoyed gardening so I thought I would give it a whirl. What do you think?'
'I think they are amazing! These are so much better than any restaurant I’ve ever been to!'
'Maybe I’ll make some for the road on your trip up to Cloudsdale. You leave tomorrow, right?' Fluttershy offered, perfectly in form to her usual kindness.
'Yeah... Tomorrow night, in fact. You don’t have to do that!' Rainbow replied, delightfully munching on the homegrown vegetables.
'But I want to Dash! I can really see you like them,' She giggled as Rainbow reached for another sandwich.
'Well, I guess I’m not stopping you. Cause’ they are that good!' "
In this example we find small amounts of exposition and plot development, but buried in small talk and awkward compliments. While you write that they are close friends and they can say whatever to each other, their dialogue seems limited by formalities and compliments. It seems Rainbow is restating that Fluttershy is a good cook, and Flutters is restating her concern for and willingness to help Rainbow Dash. Then you go on to skim over the (what i would imagine would be) important stuff,
"The pegasui shared a few stories and laughs as the minutes passed by. The moment was spent in the manner that only two best friends could enjoy; both felt immeasurably comfortable with sharing their feelings. After some prying, Fluttershy would open her personality a great measure; certain that Rainbow would understand."
Instead of writing out a conversation between best friends, where we get to hear Fluttershy's feelings, you merely state that such an event occurred. So in short, it seems you write out the awkward conversation starters and offhand compliments, but then skip the important dialogue that would show that the two are comfortable with each other. Other than that though, i did not find much to criticize (of course, this is partially because I have not read much of your work so i cant recognize many patterns that show throughout your writing, or any bad habbits that could be corrected). Thumbs up from me
1086648 Personally, I would be very interested to hear your thoughts on why the mane six couldn't be paired. I have no real thoughts on the matter yet, and you have a way with reason and logical debate.
1095648
Wish I had more time to write more (I will later) but all I can say is... Rewrites are on the way!
1095648 I'll probably post a brief essay-ish thing I made about the subject. XD And it's only in regards to canon, though. Beyond that, in Fanon, pair up away!
1095648
I understand all of your points and after rereading it, it totally does feel awkward and out of place! So now I'm driven to fix it!
I'm rewriting all of the dialogue between Dash and Fluttershy; skipping the pleasantries as you said and focusing more on their friendship. The whole thing kinda skipped by head. Will fix!
Thanks for your input! I would really appreciate it if you could reread the chapter after the rewrite (it will be republished) and offer some input... If that's okay with you
1095648
I edited it... Tell me what you think!
Thanks for your suggestions!
Wow! That was great
! Things flowed nicely and there was a clear sense that Dash and Flutters understood and cared for each other. I must say, I am impressed 
In my personal opinion, I don't criticize chapters that often, or do I? I dunno, the important thing is that this story, this story my dear sir, is a flutterdash story and most likely will have RD and Flutter shy as a couple. Every one reading comment: Well duh, Captain Obvious. Me: Well, no need to be rude. It IS a flutterdash story. Just obviously pointing it out on the web to everyone else. People: Why? Me: Because sometimes you just feel like selling something. People: What? Me: And that is how I wiped out the dinosaurs. DinoManDraves: YOU killed all my brothers and sisters? Me: MUFFINS! :Xanazumaki: Hey! That's my joke! Navi: And there my muffins! Everyone: What the.... why would... what?
great so far can't wait for more
1108245
beastkong.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/success-baby.jpg
Can I count you in for feedback in the future chapters?
1108534
I'm not a dinosaur, though I'd like to be
1109432
Thanks so much! Will get more out soon
Found one error:
“Oh I’m so happy for you! It’s great that you finally found a special somepony! But darling, are you said that she is leaving?”
Last sentence should be this. V V
"It's great that you've found a special somepony! But darling, aren't you sad that she is leaving?"
1087409
hausderluege.org/content/gallery2/d/108536-1/funny-dog-pictures-at-first-i-was-like.jpg
Very compelling and keeping your readers intrigued with the rewrites! It's nice to see the edits that we did with your story! Keep at it man!
1108534
Said the true gentleman.
1085261
Soo cute. D'aww
I like Rarity a lot more now. <------ "You Don't Say?" dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_YouDontSay2.png You might think.
But, aww come on. She helped Fluttershy to come closer to Rainbow Dash. I know it is a fiction. But after a little thinking. That is exactly what Rarity would have done.
1095648
Wow, you have such skills with idea and editing. I am bad at it. Anyways, I am impressed a lot. You can help him a lot. I am jelly.
To Author:
I am only a Proof-read. So I can only help with the grammar and spellings. Sorry!
I see your writing style now. Conversation and thoughts are your primary things. (no offense, just pointing it out.) And I have no trouble with that. No typos were seen. Although, some grammar mistakes. I have the "Grammar Critisicm zone" OPEN to help you out.
"Grammar Critisicm zone is OPEN!"
It was supposed to be "made". While "made" and "created" both mean the same thing. But, their usage is different. Like: I made sandwiches for you, I made him happy, I made some friends. etc. It is mostly used for person's emotions or group of people. Something like that.
Created is for more advanced things: I made a robot, I created this house <------ (The house thing applies in Minecraft only. It is a creative game.). etc. It is usually used for making something advanced or making an invention. Not food.
"I guess I have a way with animals." is the correct one. Because, leaving at "way animals" is raw. And the actual reason of having ways with animals is missing.
Not sure if it is has grammar mistakes: (these can be put down by anyone replying to me explaining why they are not/are.)
"Overcame" seems much suited for it. Cause, it means of overcoming or beating something of his/her worst fears. May also mean many other things. Although, conquered might still work, it only seemed less suited for me.
And my favorite lines:
I soo totally loved this line. So true. Fluttershy is pure innocent and cute. Awesome work on this!
I laughed at this one. It was really funny. RD lying because trying to be cool, is cool.
Once again. I am really enjoying your story a lot. Awesome one I say! On to the next one...
Was the part about pirates and pie a Spongebob reference? And yay for Flutterdash. Also I don't think that Rainbow should do barrel rolls. Barrels can never be trusted
There wasn't really any build-up to Flutter's feelings for Dash. They just seemed to come out of nowhere.
The endless dialogue was a tad bit difficult to follow.
Sorry, I tend to be rather blunt at times.