Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash shamefully walked to the front of the school, They were so many emotions rushing through their minds: rage, that the CMC created Anon-a-Miss. Sadness, that Sunset have to suffer so much trauma. Shock, that she've committed suicide, and simple guilt, that they've blamed and disowned Sunset in the first place without a second thought.
Twilight was standing in front of the portal with the angriest expression anyone can ever have, shaking violently.
"Look, Twilight," Applejack began, "Ah know we've fucked up so badly. And-"
"Hypocrite!" Twilight interrupted, slapping AJ across the face, "Blaming Sunset Shimmer is one thing, but celebrating her suicide like it someone's birthday is just crap!" She stomped her foot in the ground so hard a bit of snow shook off the roof of the school, making Fluttershy step back in fear. The princess's body began to twitch and her eyes became red with anger as the muscles in her head became visible. "I've trusted you with Sunset, and I thought she was happy here! But I guess I was wrong!". She pulled AJ down by her hair, and repeatedly punched her in the stomach intil she regurgitate everything her gut was holding. "I've given you a chance, and you blew it."
"We're sorry Twilight," said Rarity, trying to reason with her, "we've should've never-"
Twilight had uncontrollably scratched the left side of Rarity's face. Three noticeable scars dripped with blood as she screamed in pain. Before she can speak Twilight spotted a pocket knife that was lying in the snow, and slashed Rarity's hair with it. Rarity cried as her hair is now down to her ears.
"Sorry is not going to cut it, bitch!"
Pinkie Pie ran towards Rarity at aid her, but Twilight used her middle and index finger to poked Pinkie in the eyes. Pinkie gave a quick shout of pain walking backwards.
Twilight ran towards Fluttershy, like a serial killer would in a horror film. She pushed Shy down to the ground, ignoring her crys for her to stop. She punched and kicked Fluttershy all around her body, giving her bruises all over her. Fluttershy cried harder than her ever had before.
Rainbow Dash who had seen enough charged towards Twilight with her fists out. But Twilight was well prepared for this. She tripped Rainbow with her foot causing her to fall down face first on the pavement. She quickly got back up and tried to attack the princess, but Twilight kicked her as hard as she could in the shin, making the bone snap. Rainbow fell down screaming in pain as she held her leg.
"Consider yourselves lucky that I'll let you live."
Applejack was holding her stomach in pain. Rarity was crying, holding the scars on her face with one hand while stroking her cut off hair with the other. Pinkie Pie was holding two black eyes. Fluttershy was on the ground with bruises all over her body, also crying. And Rainbow was limping on a broken leg, that was sticking out in an odd angle and bit a the bone sticking out.
"Okay Twilight!" Shouted Dash annoyed, "I know we've fucked, and there's no way to makes you forgive us. But you're just being stupid! You-"
"You're right," said Twilight suddenly, "I was stupid, thinking you can have the magic of friendship." A few flames came out of Twilights hair. "Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash of the human world. Due to your betrayal and action, was have not only pushed Sunset to suicide, and broke up so many friendships, you have given me a perfect example that you're not worthy of wielding the magic of friendship!" Her eyes became a little red as an orange aura radiated around her body, and her skin became pale white. Her body began to twitch violently as she floated to air. "You are unworthy, to have equestrian magic, you're unworthy of title, you're not worthy to have friendship." Now in Sun flare form, She lifted her hand in the air and light came out the (hu)mane five.
"You're unworthy of having the power of honesty," Twilight said, ripping the magic out of Appejack.
"Loyalty," she said, ripping the magic out of Rainbow Dash.
"Laughter," she said, ripping the magic out of Pinkie.
"Generosity," she said, ripping the magic out of Rarity.
"Kindness," she said, ripping the magic out of Fluttershy.
"This magic will go to someone who is truly worthy." Twilight took a few deep breaths to attempt to calm herself down. She slowly landed to the ground as her flames died down and skin and eyes returned to normal.
"I'm going back to Equestria now, and as soon as I do the portal will be destroyed, so you can't have contact with me ever again. Goodbye, and have a nice rest of your lives." She stuck her middle finger out and walked towards the portal.
"Oh, and one more thing, fuck you." She said coldly as she jumped inside the portal.
The Rainbooms huddled together for a group hug as they cried. How could they fucked up so badly with Sunset?
Good idea, but Twilight is horribly OOC, and I doubt would stoop to this level of violence to get her way. Hell, I'd say for this she's not worthy of being the Princess of Friendship.
Uh, Twi?
Shouldn't you at least take Sunset back to Equestria for a proper Equeztrian burial before you destroy said portal?
Better for her to be laid to rest in her home and native land than in the world of Canterlot High.
9282226
I know she is ooc in this but i don't think that makes her unworthy of her title. She is a ruler and sunset is one of her subjects. They brought the death of one of her subjects. It is punishment and I would not blame twilight for doing this. Sure its ooc but that does not mean she does not deserve her title some times an eye for a eye is the only for people to see things clearly. If anything this is merciful for what they did most would have just killed them on the spot.
9282240
"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind."
Mohandas K. Ghandi.
9282249
Touche!
I didn't know they already hate fucked fascinating.😈
Edgelord
Wow. Cant blame Twilight for what she did. The human 5 should be thankful it was Twilight and not Princess Celestia
9282226
I agree so but I would have accepted it without magic
Though twilight here was behaving like the MCU God who had three children and only one didn't turn evil
9282265
I'm quoting that on my list of unfortunate typos.
9282443
MCU?
9282574
Marvel Cinematic universe
9282591
Cheers.
I made Thor reference, watch it on Netflix.
I think I’m in Love 😍
wow so many spelling errors, you need to correct them
9282567
Happy to be of service and enjoy your fanfic surf. 👍
9282654
This makes my stories look like Shakespeare!
9282334
Ok ok ok sorry about that. I was really excited to read the the updates. But not happy how they went.
The first three chapters were decent and enjoyed them, thou small still decent.
While was surprised how angry and vicious Twilight was at the end of chapter three, but understood why after seeing she learned of Sunset's death.
The police idea is possible thou, be a warrant first and maybe a pair of cops, and maybe if Sunset was being charged by some of the parents of the kids who secrets were exposed and warrant such a reaction.
Say kids ran away or tried to end their lives or had a huge emotional break down or near nervous breakdown from what was revealed and what they went thru afterwards.
Depending how strong the law was on CyberBullying in the area or so.
The Rainbooms thinking Sunset was going to confess and beng gleeful ...yes possible can see that, them jumping and down celebrating her death.....no.
Twilight actions afterwards was a bit overboard, but possible, but after how the Rainbooms cheered for Sunset's death
I would suggest different consequences , the elements strip yet and the reactions from the families.
Granny Smith slapping AppleJack hard and ripping into her verbally, stating how shameful and wrong it is to celebrate someone's death like that.
Pinkie fired from the Cake's shop as they would not want someone like Pinkie to work there after how she reacted.
Rainbow suspended or kicked out of the sporting clubs.
Rarity suffering a very damaging state to her rep, not only for her sister's actions but her own.
Fluttershy maybe being let go or banned from the Animal shelter same as Pinkie, they just can't have someone who celebrated a young girl's death so happily.
9282827
I'd like to add an error to your list. The Police immediately stand diwn to some random high school kid.
This qualifies as a GBH charge in British and American law.
okay
in none of these fics have I ever seen the Rainbooms literally jump for joy over someone's death, especially Sunset's, and for good reason - it's a shitty, fucked up thing to do, and despite how they feel about Sunset in these stories, something like that happening would be a fucking turning point which would create doubt rather than them continuing to believe that the account is hers
even they, for all the shitty things I've seen them do to Sunset's psyche in these stories, have standards and morals (aside from RD in certain fics I guess, but rarely ever do I have sympathy for her because in every Anon-a-Miss fic she's always the one who sets up hits and acts as the ringleader for Sunset's depression circus), and you just chucked them all out the window in favor of misguided and unresearched edge
and don't get me started on Twilight - yes, I've read stories where she's absolutely furious, and rightfully so, but never to the point where she's beating the shit out of people and nearly leaving them for dead - she's the fucking Princess of Friendship if you've forgotten, and yes, there are fics where she denounces the Rainbooms' elements, but they're done a whole lot better than this
also, as mentioned, why the fuck are even the police out for Sunset's blood to the point where they're raiding her house without a warrant
I don't see how there's anything even remotely related to A Wrinkle in Time here, all I see is just a never-ending stream of edge
I wrote this comment on my phone - if there's hope for me, there's hope for you
no Goldblums out of a possible ten Goldblums
9283814
You, sir, took the words right out of my mouth! Have an upvote.
9283884
That simply isn't good enough. If you want help, get an editor.
9283884
And you should never write a story quickly, you should write it so it is good.
9283884
so you don't want to put any effort into it at all? do you even really want to write a story with an attitude like that?
9283939
Who is Don Worry?
9283939
that doesn't really answer my question m8
9284082
Precisely!
9284082
Quite right
Dont worry about how fast you get the chapters out. Honestly, your readers would rather you take your time to make a well structured, written chapter rather than rushing to complete it and kinda being out of order. Just giving some polite constructive criticism
9284000
Sorry, autocorrect
I'm starting to see a pattern with these "edgier" Anon-A-Miss fics. They try to be grittier by ratcheting up the drama by shitting on Sunset even more through various morally dubious and legally questionable means. Killing Sunset and having the Rainbooms fucking cheer for her death is probably the worst one I've seen. Ever. I'm already tired of this trend of bullying Sunset to suicide or whatever and I'm seriously sick of people villianizing the Rainbooms for no other reason than because "THEY HURT MY PRECIOUS WAIFU SUNSET!" It's the same with all Fic-Fics, the author needs to protect their not real in any way waifu by shitting on the people and or ponies who dare oppose them.
It's stupid pandering bullshit and not a good way to write a story. Killing people can be a good way to create drama. Not in this rushed bullshit way where people are actively celebrating her death like she was Hitler. I think this entire fucking genre has gone too far in trying to glorify Sunset and demonize the Rainbooms and I wish people could either A. Write an unique take on Anon-A-Miss that doesn't involve Sunset committing suicide or B. Realizing that your waifu is not fucking real, it's a comic released four years ago, get over it and move on with their lives and write something fucking else.
It's been done before, it's been done better, this is poorly written and rushed, everyone is out of character.... I can go on. But I don't want to waste any more time, I'm angry enough already.
cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/467675310125613059/485427416311791626/Pissed_Blanc.png
9284427
I honestly thought he was a relative of Don Quixote!
9284450
I tried to do something similar in one of my stories. But your point more or less summarises my feelings for this story. I'll continue to follow it though, purely for the comedy value.
9284469
at least it's not Evictus
9284473
Evitcus?
9284473
Hey, I'm Evictus' editor!
9284659
Evictus is a fellow author on here. He used to write utter garbage, but then I stepped in an become his editor. Things have improved a bit...since then.
9284424
Eeyup!
9284469
I wrote Anon-A-Miss once myself.
I'm not particularly happy with it, but it's also my best performing fic to date and does take Anon-A-Miss in a new direction. At least, I've never seen one where Sunset doxxes Anon-A-Miss via the internet,
9285903
Don't worry, I'm cleaning up chapter 4 now.
9285903
I remember that. I'll go and put it in my favourites now.
At least this author doesn't do what Windlife does and delete comments willy-nilly!
9282240
Besides, the Rainbooms didn't kill Sunset. Sunset did.
9291084
You're commenting on my story a lot!
9291224
Well observed.
9285578 I've got news for you, my friend: even with you editting his stuff, they're still garbage.
9298737
You hit the nail on the head, my friend.