Pinkie moaned as her nails were leaving deep scratches in Spike’s scales. Bullets don't do a thing, she ain't leaving scratches.
Also Rainbow Dash and Pinky were removed from the room twice.
AND you, Starlight, and me will work FULL time until we find a way to ensure Spike does not kill a mare when having sex.” Starlight should be trixie 90% sure.
Fun to read and you developed a plot first before starting the fuck fest, which is nice. Fluttershy seems to have gotten less time than the other girls, notably. Overall though, I look forward to the rest, but I must say this could really benefit from a proofreader or 2. There's a lot of small errors. In the grand scheme of the size of the work it's pretty good to only have as many as you did, but fixing them is always better since they do make the reader stop and scratch there head.
8525684 Don't get sore. Trust me, I've had my stuff looked over, pointed out, criticized, and even hated very vocally. Take what you can that's useful from anywhere, even the biggest assholes. I don't expect it to be prefect, and this size is far from new or special to me. I suggest finding a 2nd proofreader because at that point you'll catch 95% of the mistakes usually. I'm not interested myself (too much to do), but there's usually a lot of helpful people on this site who enjoy assisting authors where they can.
Final note, do chapters based on what feels right for the chapter. I think these are pretty perfectly sized how they are. They cut off clean but leaving wanting more.
NOW DEFINITELY, YOU MUST ADD CELESTIA LUNA CANDACE EMBER AND CHRYSALIS.
that anyone who likes the idea supports me.
by the way I thought it would only be one mare per chapter but here we saw 4.
Finally you are a god fucking for the fic, save oh almighty SonicBlitz18. I can not wait for the next chap and by the way it is not cuddly to Madness bookman. the long chapters are great.
Well, errors aside, that was hot. Now I've hoping by the end of this, Spike gets a growth spurt somewhere between his two sizes, and that Applejack and Fluttershy are pregnant!
Just. WOOOOOWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That got intense. Cant wait for the villains to get involved.
Pinkie moaned as her nails were leaving deep scratches in Spike’s scales. Bullets don't do a thing, she ain't leaving scratches.
Also Rainbow Dash and Pinky were removed from the room twice.
AND you, Starlight, and me will work FULL time until we find a way to ensure Spike does not kill a mare when having sex.” Starlight should be trixie 90% sure.
Fun to read and you developed a plot first before starting the fuck fest, which is nice. Fluttershy seems to have gotten less time than the other girls, notably. Overall though, I look forward to the rest, but I must say this could really benefit from a proofreader or 2. There's a lot of small errors. In the grand scheme of the size of the work it's pretty good to only have as many as you did, but fixing them is always better since they do make the reader stop and scratch there head.
8525440
It wasn't easy editing this thing. Of course we're gonna miss some things. Thanks for the feedback.
8525440
That was Twilight talking to Trixie on how they were going to work together.
8525848
I’m putting this in my favorites are yu writing the next chapter I like to see how this ends once it’s over
you should make these chapters shorter
8525848
That's fair enough.
8525684 Don't get sore. Trust me, I've had my stuff looked over, pointed out, criticized, and even hated very vocally. Take what you can that's useful from anywhere, even the biggest assholes. I don't expect it to be prefect, and this size is far from new or special to me. I suggest finding a 2nd proofreader because at that point you'll catch 95% of the mistakes usually. I'm not interested myself (too much to do), but there's usually a lot of helpful people on this site who enjoy assisting authors where they can.
Final note, do chapters based on what feels right for the chapter. I think these are pretty perfectly sized how they are. They cut off clean but leaving wanting more.
8526571
Thanks. And I'm not the one picking out where the Chapters End, Sonicblitz does that
The... The Man-Emperor listened to my prayers... I am happy!
8526642
Well it was separated to be separate from both statements, largely cause it had to do with someone else's comment.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW SIMPLY WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWW.
NOW DEFINITELY, YOU MUST ADD CELESTIA LUNA CANDACE EMBER AND CHRYSALIS.
that anyone who likes the idea supports me.
by the way I thought it would only be one mare per chapter but here we saw 4.
Finally you are a god fucking for the fic, save oh almighty SonicBlitz18. I can not wait for the next chap and by the way it is not cuddly to Madness bookman. the long chapters are great.
sorry for my bad english
Well, errors aside, that was hot. Now I've hoping by the end of this, Spike gets a growth spurt somewhere between his two sizes, and that Applejack and Fluttershy are pregnant!![:moustache:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/moustache.png)
![:yay:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/yay.png)
![:ajsmug:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/ajsmug.png)
That leaves Rarity, Twilight, Starlight, Trixie, Stripes, Calm Breeze, and the 3 villain mares.
Well 4 mares knocked up, 9 more to go. Am I right SonicBlitz18? C:
Please let this be a ending that Spike wins and everymares become his girls!
This was awesome and just a matter of time I wonder who will be next