• Published 4th Apr 2017
  • 4,734 Views, 348 Comments

Lovie Dovie - The Psychopath



A man obsessed with his masculinity becomes a tiny, female dragon that is designed around hearts to an extreme. He tries to live through this 'horror' while working with an extremely important association of dragons.

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Pink Flute

Lovey huffed tiredly. She had just awoken from a night of slumber and digesting a huge meal she had the night prior, courtesy of the lovie dovies and helping her recover from two days without food and water. The dragoness thanked them for the gracious meal, but Scarlet said something to her that still rang in her ears like drums:

"If you want to keep eating here, then you're going to learn how to cook, and for that, you're going to need to learn how to use your fire breath. We don't use anything the ponies to light fires. We like the natural conflagration."

For that, she needed to go back to Sconce, and she hadn't seen her since she had left with Ember. The dragoness hummed nervously but proceeded to Sconce's little garden and cleared her throat. The teacher was sitting on her rock, 'meditating'. Cautiously, the pink dragoness approached her, stepping forward tip-toe by tip-toe. Once close enough, Lovey tapped the teacher on the shoulder and whispered.

"Sconce. I'm back."

The dragoness opened her eyes and looked at Lovey. "Oh. There you are. I couldn't find for a while now. What were you doing?"

"Wh..." Lovey Dovey took a deep breath. "I've been gone for several days. I can walk now," she splurted out in frustrated bursts.

"So you have?"

Sconce got off her rock and slowly walked around Lovey, observing her posture, then she fell asleep, forcing Lovey to slap her awake again.

"Yes!" Sconce shouted. "I can see that you have indeed been working on your movement, but to get to this point so quickly is astonishing." She frowned. "That being said, you still need to better use your tail and keep your posture straighter."

"I'm doing the best I can."

"For now!" Sconce corrected. "I take it you found some kind of way to focus your thoughts to get to this point?"

"My..." Lovey blushed and rubbed her arm. "My bestiality..."

Sconce's eye twitched, then her head dropped. Once again, Lovey had to wake her up with a slap, startling the dragon.

"Bestiality is what the regular dragons use to grow. We aren't 'regular dragons'," Sconce said behind clenched teeth.

"That's the problem with standardized education," Lovey looked down at the dragon with a haughty expression. "It's a 'standard'. It's not a 'specialized'. What works for many might not work for some, and will never work for a few."

"It's still unheard of for a lovie dovie to use the natural dragon proficiencies to bring out her capabilities."

Lovey smirked. "This is the first time I've seen you show an emotion other than 'sleep'," she teased.

"And this is the first time I've ever seen you display an emotion other than anger and frustration."

Lovey furrowed her brows. "Fair enough," she said.

"Aside from that, you've made good progress. Now we can teach you how to breathe fire, but I won't be the teacher for that."

The pink dragoness blinked several times with confusion. "What do you mean?"

"It means that I'm not the teacher for that. I'm the one to help new members how to walk and old members to do the same if they were in an accident inconveniencing them...or other...incidents," Sconce trailed off.

The two remained in silence for awhile, but Sconce found it appropriate to fall asleep yet again, making Lovey groan and drag her hand across her face.

"I'll just...look for someone to direct me," Lovey grumbled.

The dragoness went for the exit, but had a momentary change of heart and looked behind her to see her teacher sleeping. She sighed, shook her head in disappointment, and left.

"Now all I need to do is ask someone for...directions."

Lovey dropped her arms in defeat. While Oliver had never thought that asking directions was wrong, regardless of gender, he couldn't stand talking to complete strangers on the street. While these dragons were certainly the friendliest dragons he had ever met, he didn't exactly know many. He only knew a handful -Metaphorically speaking- of lovie dovies, and other dragons he'd rather not think about.

Lovey raised a claw and tried calling out to the pass dragons. "Um...Excu..."

She couldn't bring herself to raise her voice. So many dragons in the same place. No matter how much she tried to raise her voice, it would falter, much like a flashlight running on drained batteries or a car engine sputtering from lack of fuel.

The pink dragoness clutched her head between her claws and screamed internally. "What's wrong with me?!" she thought. "I wasn't like this when I got here! WHY CAN'T SPEAK ALOUD IN FRONT OF ALL OF THESE DRAGONS?!"

Several of the passing dragons noticed Lovey freaking out from the corner of their eyes and actually stopped to check on her.

"You okay there, Lovey?" one of them asked.

The pink dragoness was leaning her arm against the bush wall and hyperventilating when confront. A good few moments of breathing and flexing her arms got her back on track.

"Yes. Um...I need to find the way toooo...The fire breathing teacher?"

"Oh. Um...Where is she again?" the dragon pondered. "Where are they again?" she asked her companions near her.

"Uhhh...The ones for the smaller dragons is near the north-eastern end of the garden, no?"

"No no. That's the place for the large dragons," a second companion interjected. "She needs to go to the west. A few dozen meters from the tower."

"Isn't that where the medium sized ones are?" the first asked.

"No, she's right. It's there," the second dragoness agreed. She looked at Lovey and pointed to the left. "It's over there. Just enter the bushes and you'll find yourself facing signs telling you where to go anyways if you get lost."

"Oh...Thank you..."

Lovey forced a smile and hurried away. The three dragons watched her nervously depart and chuckled.

"She really does look cute when she's embarrassed," the first dragon said.

"I know. And did you see how nervous she was to talk with us? Someone's changing a lot," the third added.

Lovey's romp through the bushes was almost like walking through a forest. This was a deeper section of the gardens with much more work put into it. The hedges looked like proper, trimmed, solid walls as opposed to their more natural and grown appearance near the tower. They blocked sound as well, making it very difficult to hear, but also very calming. Sure enough, Lovey started scratching her head, wondering where to go, and, sure enough again, there were hand-carved signs of wood placed into the bush walls.

"These things look like they were just jammed in the twigs angrily," Lovey commented. "Looks like the teachers are on the right."

The pink dragoness nodded and continued her way, eventually noticing an increased in temperature. The bushes were changing from a dark green to a more orange-brown, and eventually, red and black. Embers were calmly floating in the air, uncaring of anything around them and enjoying their brief moments of burning life. Lovey leaned against a huge, black wall and listened for what was on the other side.

"Hmmm. I hear fire angrily burning and flowing outwards. I think this is it."

She slapped the sides of her head several times and burst through the dark leaves to see a huge, open area where multiple dragons around Lovey's size were practicing in the presence of older dragons.

"I guess this is it," Lovey mumbled. She felt a shiver run down her spine, and her wings spontaneously opened up before quickly returning to their resting spot. "It feels like my first day of school...How horrible," she commented with disgust.

"HI THERE!" a voice bellowed directly into Lovey's 'ear'.

The pink dragoness screamed and jumped several feet backwards.

"Wow. It really does look like you've gotten the hang of walking like us," she noted joyfully.

The dragon who scared Lovey was slightly taller than her, but not by much. She had an equally lithe build, but she was definitely happier and more excited. A row of sharp teeth were perpetually showing themselves in a wide smile. Her muzzle was far narrower than Lovey's, almost looking like a thin beak. Her head possessed hair coiffed to he left and partially obstructing her eye. It broke off into several 'darts', giving it an unkempt and frisky look. Her hair started off an almost black shade of dark blue, with its tips gradually changing from red to yellow. She had two horns raising almost directly upwards diagonally, save for a short bend halfway across her head. Several smaller horns were growing out of the main ones, and like said main horns, all had a dark-blue, ashy color.

Her body was, strangely, changing gradually. The bulk of her scales were the same ashy dark blue as her horns, but it looked like every part of her was on fire, or that a fire was being displayed a very thin sheet of glass. The flames were burning at the base of her limbs and stomach, and would eventually thin out into an increasing amount of calmly rising smoke.Aside from that, the rest of her body had no distinguishing physical characteristics compared to the rest of the lovie dovies.

There was one thing she was doing that set her apart from many that Lovey had seen up to this point: She was 'dancing. She had her fists on her hips, a leg extended forward with its foot tapping the ground to a rythm, her smiling head bobbing up and down, and her torso following the same pattern.

"She's very...'chipper'," Lovey mocked in her head.

"Glad to finally meet you, Lovey. I'm Asherk," she sputtered 'comically'.