Sometimes They Call Me Super

by KorenCZ11

Persona XXII: Gang-Star's Dream (part 1)

Goose Fang

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Saturday, October 5^th, 2030

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“This doesn’t work if you’re not focused,” Celestia’s voice came from high above.

“But of course, my goddess.” I bowed to nopony in the white ethereal space. If I could see her, I’m certain she would be rolling her eyes.

“Both of you, goodness. And I told you to stop calling me that. I am no goddess. I cannot do everything and anything, nor did I design the world we live in. I especially can’t help you train when at least two of you aren’t actually paying attention. Her mind is clouded and confused and she’s making awful decisions, and it’s almost like you’re on autopilot. What’s going on?” I shrugged. Might as well.

“Well, truth is, I’m planning on proposing next week.” Silence from the void. Even the screen with everypony else still struggling in the simulation paused.

“I’m sorry?”

“I, Lamnidae Carcharodon, am going to ask Jaqueline Apple to be my wife. See, I’ve got the whole thing planned, I just need to go get the pendant I commissioned and then see about getting the wedding set up. I’ve got to-” In a flash of blinding white light, which was weird to discern in this white void, Celestia appeared before me.

“You’re completely serious. Are you sure this is a good decision right now? Nopony expects to get killed in a battle, but you still have one coming up tomorrow, and what about the weeks after? Goose, I simply don’t-” I crossed my forelegs and shook my head.

“Don’t try to talk me out of this. I’ve been having this argument with myself for three weeks now. I am concerned that I won’t get the chance if I don’t do it soon.” She took a seat in front of me and leaned down to be at eye level. I never realized it, but her torso is about the size of my entire body. Isn’t Twilight like, only slightly above average as far as mare height goes? Her dad was probably at least a big guy, maybe even Mac’s size, but even then… how did the logistics of that work?

“Very carefully. Her father was a great stallion, but no trend breaker as far as size goes. Now then, Twilight’s creation aside, what’s the plan here? Do you have your documents ready? Do you have a wedding date in mind? A where and a when? What about invitations? Have asked her family about this yet? What about your family? Do you have any left? Are there ponies in your life that should know about this? Take it from me, you shouldn’t be telling your sister that you got married after the fact.” I scratched at my beard.

“I know I asked the question, but it’s not like I was expecting an answer. Is that the passive mind reading, or just a side effect of the dream?” Goddess damn it, I’m going to be thinking about that all day now. Celestia smirked.

“Catering to two heads is hard, isn’t it? A little of both. Of course, Rainbow knows how to block me out and I’ve yet to figure out how she’s doing it without a horn. Luna can’t seem to get into her head either, it’s very strange. Now then, back to the other topic.” Devious.

“Yeah, I adjusted my will a little before Ramiel and I got everything else ready. I don’t think she’ll say no-” Celestia cut me off.

“Really? You still have doubts about that? I know you’re the opposite of oblivious.” I rolled my eyes.

“It could happen! The possibility is out there, even if the chances are… well, decidedly low. Point is, pages are ready, but I’m not certain on how she wants to do her name. I don’t know why it is, but her legal last name is Apple. You would think with the way her dad was just kicked out, he would have it changed, but I couldn’t find anything on ‘Citrus Root’ anywhere, so I’m still looking into that.” Celestia nodded.

“Ah yes, the mythical ‘Citrus Root.’ After Rarity sent me the application for her, I of course went digging into every detail I could find about her. Can’t have just anypony around my baby after all. Traced through the Apple side, she is a direct descendant of Palomino Apple, the stallion the province is named after. They were always good with their family records, but to think they had catalogued over two millennia of it… Anyways, that side is easy.

Her father essentially doesn’t exist in any of my databases, which leads me to believe that Citrus Root is an alias, and I have no idea who the pony under the mask really was. ‘Blood Orange’ also only has records dating back around twenty years ago and I’ve never heard anything of grand parents on her father’s side. Twilight has taken everypony’s blood and will be doing tests on that for me later tomorrow night, so I will find out. But for the same reason I have no information, you have no information, so there’s that.” I put a hoof under my chin. No records from before 2010? Who the hell is this guy?

“Now that you bring that up, I think I’ll have some of my guys look into that. I know a guy who knows more in theory, but he told me his sister locked away some of his memories and she’s the only one who can bring them back. If she’s still alive, finding her would be really helpful. Uh, I’m sure you’ll find out anyways, so his name is Star Slate. Owns Star Apparel over on the east side not too far from the water.” Celestia nodded.

“Interesting. I’ll have to have you get with Raven and exchange contacts. What about family?” I shrugged.

“I don’t have any siblings so that shouldn’t be an issue on my side. Still uncertain about how I’ll approach hers. I want to propose on Tuesday in front of my parent’s graves since it’s supposed to be nice out, so sometime before then would be ideal.” Celestia raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t know Swan Song was buried. But… in a graveyard? That’s a little…” I rolled my eyes.

“You don’t understand. My dad had the grave built just for her. There are like, maybe twelve other ponies besides them buried there, it’s more like a garden filled with statues. He loved your décor, so it really looks a lot like Canterlot gardens. He had these statues carved out of marble of him and mom built to interlock and look like they’re dancing, he blew millions on this. I promise, it might be a graveyard, but it doesn’t look like a graveyard.” Celestia raised her hooves.

“Okay fine. I didn’t meet your father but once or twice in person-”

“You also met him when he was a kid. I have a picture of him, grandad and you in my house actually.” Celestia squinted at me.

“Really? Well, I suppose he underwent drastic changes after 2000, so I can’t be blamed for not recognizing him. Goodness, that must’ve been almost half a century ago, I haven’t done a ‘meet the princess’ in decades. Speaking of pictures, I want them. I want lots of them. I have photo albums of all my close staff getting married over the years, and I expect this one to be no different.”

“Alright, I can do that. But in return, can I get off early today? I don’t have any blood family left, my father was good to his wife, but I still haven’t told the gang about this yet and that… is going to be a long conversation.” Celestia rolled her eyes.

“Though it is Saturday, I will allow it. But only because there really isn’t much else I can do for you for this particular Kaiju. If you haven’t noticed, I’ve only been running the Matarael simulation every other battle because it’s just too easy with the technology you have. These things are significantly less of a threat when you can just blow them to hell without consequences in the form of billions of bits. Had I nuclear technology a thousand years ago, there are so many battles over the centuries that I could’ve just ended in seconds. Anyways, that’s one family, but what about hers? Her father’s origins aside, you do plan on asking for her uncle’s blessing don’t you?” I shivered.

“You say that like it’s easy to talk to the guy. Yeah, I do. Applebloom actually works for my company, so I plan on giving her a day off to be apart of that meeting, but I still need to set it up. Mac has a weird work schedule, so I’ll have to find a time on Monday or something to get that taken care of.” Celestia nodded.

“Ah yes… Now that is a high quality specimen. Arranged marriages died out a millennium ago in this country, but if I were to ever pick for my daughter for no purpose other than breeding quality-” I put my hooves up and looked away.

“Oh, my goddess, can you not? What are you, a cougar?” She shrugged.

“I mean, technically, any sexual relationship I were to engage in would be predatorial because there is no living creature as old as I am… active right now. Of course, biologically speaking, alicorns stop aging at about twenty-five. Ponies begin to physically deteriorate around twenty-six, so this is the age in which the brain is fully developed, and the body has yet to start deteriorating. There’s even a small amount of growth that can happen in ponies at this age, and due to the halting of the clock, we continue to minimally grow over the years. Once upon a time, I was actually Twilight’s size, as was Luna. Of course, back home there was never an alicorn to live beyond a millennium because more often than not, somepony would kill them, or they would finally choose death. My society was plagued with a great deal of things yours does not experience simply because of the ageless thing. Be glad you have a limited lifespan.” Okay, that was a tangent.

“Uh… while this is interesting and all, is that everything? Because If I’m going to get all this set up, I really need to kinda… go do that soon.” Celestia gasped.

“Oh, goodness, what am I doing? I’m sorry, I have the capacity to just talk sometimes. Yes, go make sure you have your ducks in a row and I will make an excuse to everypony else. I won’t lie to you and say I’m not a little excited about this. You spend a few months treating a mare like your daughter and suddenly you forget that she isn’t yours. I expect to hear great things and several grandchildren, you understand?” I nodded and smiled thinly.

“Yes ma’am.”

---

“Hey, are you in here?” I called out in the closed Carcha. Our stores don’t usually open till noon, and since things had gone so smoothly today, we’d only had one or two difficult simulations. It was somewhere around eleven thirty, so at least a few ponies should be here preparing to open.

“I’m in the back!” Alto called out. As the chief gem worker of the Pitch family, she was in charge of inspection and design of most of our custom jewelry. When she’s not making something new, she runs the company in my absence… which is basically all the time at this point. I followed the sounds of grinding and wheels spinning until I found her in the workshop behind the display case. She’d just turned off a rotary brush and was inspecting what I assumed was my own pendant.

“Which one is that?” She pushed up her magnifying goggles and finally looked at me. She and her siblings were two sets of fraternal twins that all look exactly alike. Blonde mane, white coat, baby blue eyes, and all with wildly different talents and personalities. Alto is the ‘oldest’ of the four, and the only one to work on dad’s side of the business directly.

“It’s yours. But uh… you sure you don’t want anything set in this? It’s a pretty plain piece at the moment. Ya know, I could cut a sapphire and fit it right-” I frowned and shook my head.

“We talked about this. Did you ever see dad let his stallions wear any kind of jewels? Like, at all?” She rolled her eyes.

“I mean, it’s not like the guy hasn’t been dead for three years now…” I shook my head.

“No, and that would be the end of that. Besides, nopony cares about mine. What about hers? Are you done with it?” Alto groaned in protest and then set my pendant down. In truth, it was very plain. Black steel backing with a platinum outline of my silver shark tooth cutiemark over one of her Apples. It looked almost identical to how it did on paper, so that was fine. It’s about how hers looks with the gemstones that had me concerned. Alto loves mosaics. She wanted to get four different kinds of gems in this thing, and she wanted to do it on three different metals, and I am one hundred percent sure Applejack is not one for something that gaudy. Rarity and Alto would get along swimmingly, now that I think about it though.

“‘Am I finished’ he says. Come on Lamni, who do ya think you’re talking to? I had this done two days ago. I wanted to make something nicer for you and you wouldn’t let me. Here. I even toned it down like you asked.” On a thin gold chain was a similar piece to mine, but far more intricate. The backing was tempered gold that made up the Apple, stem, and leaf. On top of that was a platinum plate fused into the gold that made the outline of my shark’s tooth. In the spaces between the beveled outlines were eight gemstones, four rubies cut around the crown and root of the tooth, emeralds that fit the crown of the tooth and leaf of the apple and the stem and root were both diamonds. Instead of thinking about how beautiful the piece was, my brain immediately went to the cost. These things were about the size of hockey pucks, and even though they were mostly flat cut stones, they weren’t small stones. Geez, that’s like what, tens of thousands worth of gemstones? Not to mention the metals, good goddess.

“It’s… beautiful, easily some of your best work, but…”

“I bought them raw, I did not go over budget, I promise. You said ten, so ten is what I used.” I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

“For both or just hers? Where in the world did you find a rock that big for so cheap anyways?” I took the pendant from her to inspect, and in reality, this thing was bigger than it appeared. It was almost an inch by an inch on top and with the pendant itself being about a half inch thick, I could only imagine how tall it was. It was like a damn plate. As a matter of fact, something was weird about it… it was perfect. Too perfect. Almost like the gem was designed… “And where exactly did you buy from?” She tightened her lips.

“Oh. Ya know. Around.” I shook my head.

“You’re a better liar than this.” She threw her hooves up and let out a breath.

“Okay, fine, I cheated, alright? I barely spent a gold on that. I bought the raw materials and had Clear Cut do the rest. The only thing that I actually bought here was the metal… which I bought like, last month and that was mostly leftovers from my last order.” I sighed and rolled my eyes.

“Come on, you said you would do this legit! My boss is a very intelligent and magically adept pony! If she finds out how this was made, she could get the government involved!” Alto huffed.

“Alright, whatever, I’m sorry, but there was no way I was gonna find anything that shape without making this mare wear a goddess damned boulder on her neck!” There are times I want to hit ponies.

“Which is why I told you to cool it with the materials! It didn’t have to be big, it just needed to be the right shape. It was never about the size, it was about the significance!” She groaned.

“Fine, whatever! But you better make do with that for now because there is no way I can get this remade with real stones by Tuesday.” I crossed my hooves and frowned.

“Uh-huh. Where were the sapphires coming from? Getting those transmuted by Clear too?” She turned away and started digging in a box.

“Maybe they were.” I let out a breath and set the pendant down.

“Look, I know old habits die hard, but we cannot sell forges anymore. The real ones make enough, and we won’t get hunted down by the Bit Commission this way. Can you really not remake it by Tuesday?” She glared at me and then gave me a black jewelry box for the pendant.

“Not without you going to grab everything I need. It’ll take weeks to get enough raw material shipped here. I’ll do it when I can. But we still have business to settle. What the hell is this?” From the box she was digging in, she took a little packet of paper and held it in front of my face. I recognized it immediately and dreaded the oncoming conversation.

“That looks like my will,” I said stoically. She rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, no shit. Why am I in it? Why isn’t she in it?” I lowered my brows.

“Huh? She’s in it, what are you talking about?” She sighed and took a breath.

“Lamni, be serious for a minute here. This gives me majority ownership in the event you’re incapacitated. Why? There is no way in hell that mare wouldn’t rip the pants off ya if she was ever in the mood. Wouldn’t you rather this go to your kids? I mean, I don’t know what you’ve got going on in that head of yours, but if you’re afraid something’s gonna happen, shouldn’t you set her up for the future?” I shrugged.

“I mean, did I not? I’m pretty sure I said that she gets forty percent of everything I own in the event of my death, Carcha withstanding. I know you’ve only got access to the company’s finances, but you have to know the kinda money dad had stored up. Even if something happens to me, money should never be an issue for her ever again.” She gritted her teeth and raised a hoof like she was going to hit me.

“Goddess you’re frustrating, ya know that? Are ya bangin’ or what?” I looked away and scratched at my chin.

“… Maybe a little.” She rolled her eyes.

“Okay, so you’ve been having trouble walking. You protect yourself every time?” I bit my lip and shook my head. Right. Still never bought those.

“Yeah, figured as much. So, what are we looking at here? She’s aggressive, dominant, and you haven’t been using controls, so in a year or so you’ll probably have an heir. Why does Alto Pitch own sixty percent of the company if something happens to you instead of her?” I sighed.

“Because… I think her family is stuck. Every single one of them going all the way back to Palomino himself had apple related cutiemarks. That bloodline was born to work an orchard, and as far back as I could find, there were maybe one or two strict deviations from the trend on a thousand years worth of genealogy. They did have a dad, and whatever his talent was, they still all ended up with apples on their flanks. Even if our kids end up looking just like me, they will be apples, one way or another.

You’re right, she is aggressive, and I would be lying if I said I initiated very often, it’s usually her. If I have a foal next August, I wouldn’t be super surprised. She’s reckless and oftentimes I can’t help but indulge her because… I love her. I looked into it, and she and her siblings still have a claim on that orchard. I think I can get it back if I can get a little more information on her grandparents, and if possible, I want to try and raise our kids there. She never got a chance to live out her cutiemark, and I don’t want my kids to end up the same way, ya know?” Alto frowned.

“So… let me get this straight. You are giving me Carcha… because you’re gonna try and take Sweet Apple Acres? Lamni, are you seriously gonna fight the Apples over that? Blood ties and ownership are not going to make you a case to take over a company with that kind of income.” I rolled my eyes.

“Don’t you think I know that? Look, I have a lead. There were some weird circumstances around her grandmother’s death. Her health took a more rapid decline than it should have, even if she was grieving. It’s true, she lost her only daughter, but she had three grandkids. I don’t know about you, but something about that seems off to me. Annie Smith Apple was the only heir to the direct line, everypony else is all part of branch families. If I can figure out what really happened, I can make a case that they were the ones stolen from, and then Mac will have ownership because he was next in line.

On the other side of this, my dad helped raise you after. You were like my big sister all this time. You helped build Carcha into what it is today. All your siblings work for me. I don’t think it would be Carcha without you guys, and you’ve been running this place for almost a month on your own. There are no better hooves to leave it to. Besides, it’s not like anything has happened yet, you may never get the chance to take over completely. It’s just an insurance policy, alright? I’m not going anywhere.” Alto scratched at her face and let out a breath.

“You’re irritating, ya know that?” She grabbed my head and rubbed her hoof into my scalp.

“Hey, stop that! How old are you, thirteen?” I laughed and pushed her off, and she sighed and shook her head.

“Not anymore… those days are long gone. First Bass went off and got hitched, Soprano is engaged, and now you… If Tenor finds himself a mare, I’m quitting and making you do this. I’m supposed to be the oldest, I was supposed to get married first! Oh well. I just hope the old man isn’t rolling in his grave over this.” I put a hoof on her shoulder and shook my head.

“Nah. He wouldn’t have taken you guys in if he didn’t think of you as his own. That’s just the kinda guy he was. For better or for worse, like father like son, this place is just not the same without you and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Damn you. You are just like him.” She shook her head. “Since he’s not here to tell you this, I’ll do it for him. You make damn sure that mare is the happiest mare in the world, alright? No mistresses, no one night stands, not even a moment of weakness! He would beat your ass even if he was eighty and he caught you doin’ that. If I find out you hurt her, I’ll send the whole damn gang after you. I think you can do it, so go make a good life with this mare.” She picked up the fake pendant and looked it over a few times. “I’ll get you a real pendant, made of the actual gemstones before Tuesday. It won’t be this big of course, and I’ll have to call in some help, maybe even a few favors I wasn’t ready to use, but I should’ve done this right in the first place.” I moved in and gave her a hug.

“Thanks Alto, you’re the best.” She rolled her eyes and reluctantly hugged me back.

“Whatever. Go away so I can get to work. Call me when you’ve got everything figured out. I’ll need to call in the rest of the family for this wedding of yours. Oh, speaking of, when is that happening? Like, next month or something?” I grabbed my hat off the floor and straightened it on my head.

“Yeah, about that…”

---

“Okay, wow, that’s sudden don’t ya think?” Pulse asked. In truth, I kind of expected this. Pulse was the only member of the original gang here, and I’m not sure anypony else out of my mods from the Boneheads even knew about Applejack. Maybe Aurora knew, but if she does, it was because she joined before dad died. I know I picked up Heat specifically to help me kill the Rockets, and the rest of the girls all joined later.

“Sudden for you maybe. I’ve been with her for almost two months now. You know, after looking for her for over a decade. I’ve finally got her back, I’m not letting the chance slip away.” For the first time since february, I put on a real jacket because it was in the 40’s in Crystal. It usually isn’t this cold for another month in Manehattan, but that’s just how it goes up here. I’d come to Pulse first in the ‘Carcha’ she’d established since the new location won’t have construction complete until December. Now that Alto is involved up here, we’ve kind of branded this little coffee shop as an outlet or test market store. Because of the location, the jewelry market here is a little stale so we’re thinking of opening a new store without one. It would be the first of its kind if we do. I walked in on Pulse doing… something, but I couldn’t honestly say what.

“Fine, but the others are not gonna be happy about this. Volt is gonna be heartbroken at the least, and who knows who else had real feelings for you? Besides, it’s already getting cold up here, are you sure you want to have the wedding in Crystal?” I leaned back in my chair and sipped on my coffee. Being sucked into their world definitely made me forget a few things, how I really recruited Volt Switch being one of them.

“Well, too bad. They can either be apart of it or not. And yes, I want to have it here, she’s always wanted to visit and see the castle. Up until last week, she’d never been out of the north east provinces, and nothing more than a couple hours away from Manehattan at most. When this is all over and done with, I’m think I’m going to take her on a tour of Equestria. A delayed honeymoon I guess, but I want to give her the chance to do the things she’s always wanted to. This’ll take care of the first visit and we can go from there.” Pulse laid her head on the table and sighed.

“Lamni, I get how you feel here, but that is just… not going to win anypony over. They don’t even know this mare, and you’re gonna make her their queen.” I frowned.

“What?” Pulse rolled her eyes.

“Come on Lamni, think about it! It was you and the mods at first, the king and his harem. They all looked up to you like the boss and at least half those mares wanted to take up the spot of your queen. Some of these ponies really believe that you were screwing us, and they still want in on that. You get married and suddenly the game is over. A ton of the support you got was because you had those fillies wrapped around your hooves. Maybe the guys will be happy, but even then, that’s going to piss off a lot of the mares that they want to hook up with, and you tell me who they’ll side with when it comes to you or free pussy.” I took another sip and reflected on that.

“Fuck, this isn’t going to go well, is it?” She got off the table and raised an eyebrow at me.

“I can’t believe you of all ponies didn’t think about that. Course, the colts might thank you later since some of these mares might turn on them for the rebound, but I’m mostly concerned about Volt and whoever else had something real for you.” I set the coffee down and put my hooves together on the table.

“Well. I suppose we might just meet with the mods separately first. Gauge who’s going to get hurt and who’s going to support my decision. I have an idea on who’ll end up where, but I’ve been gone for a while. I know this might make me an asshole for not noticing, but you weren’t one of them, were you?” Pulse has always been my shadow. My oldest friend for a decade and likely one of the only true friends I’ve ever had. Of course, everypony in Harmony knows me better than the old mods did, and I’m not sure Applejack doesn’t know me better than Pulse does now. She shrugged.

“I mean, you should know I’m not into stallions. I figure you catching me with Aurora the first time would’ve tipped you off. I like you and all, but after what happened before your dad got a hold of me, I thought stallions were all evil.” I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, that was a weird day. I assume I don’t have to worry about her either? Well, she did invite me to join, so…” Pulse brought her hoof to her face, then that near black coat brightened a bit around her cheeks and she quickly shook her head.

“P-probably not. Aurora will screw anything with legs, but she’s um… well, you know what she does for a living.” A thought came to mind and I leaned in and stared at her. Pulse backed away and turned redder.

“I have a feeling…” She covered her face with her hooves.

“Goose, please.” I smirked and nodded.

“I won’t go looking, I promise. I’m trying to get married after all. I know you’re not shy, but I never expected you of all ponies to get roped into one of Aurora’s videos.” She shook her head and sank below the table a little more.

“I didn’t know she was gonna record it! I thought she was just coming onto me again, I swear!” I failed miserably to contain my laughter. She shot back up and punched me in the shoulder. “Asshole!” I fended her off and managed to stop.

“Geez, give me a break! I didn’t mean it!” It’s hard to have cherry red cheeks with a black coat, but here she was doing it anyways. “You know there are laws against taking pictures of unwilling ponies like that.” She wrapped her hooves around her legs and shivered.

“Oh goddess, and admit that’s me in the video? No way! We did so much… Anypony that saw that could tell I wasn’t ‘unwilling.’ I was so lonely back then, any mare could’ve… hell, I don’t know that I would’ve turned down a stallion. Ugh. She said she only makes like a few bits per view and it’s already made her almost ten thousand since she posted it a few months ago. She wants to do another one soon and I still haven’t said no yet…” I managed to contain most of a chuckle and put a hoof on her shoulder.

“I am the least of your worries if you do another one. You just better hope none of the guys finds these videos. The very ponies you’re trying to take care of might be paying you for it.” She groaned and let her face fall flat on the table again.

“Gah, stop it! I don’t want to think about it. I should’ve listened to Mister C. He always said you should find one pony and share your life with them, but no, I just had to get wrapped up with Aurora.” She sighed. “Speaking of, what about you? I know you and Noise were a thing for a little while, are you still a virgin? No wait, didn’t Aurora get you too? I’m almost certain she’s fucked at least half the gang.” I scratched at my beard.

“Well, yes, but actually no. To be completely fair to me, I had never done anything before Aurora joined the gang. Then Aurora got me, but we didn’t go all the way. Even as… forward as she is, I still had some control of the situation. I never went all the way with Noise either, but she definitely just wanted to be with me and uh… not use my body like Aurora did. So, you would think she’s aggressive, right?” Pulse nodded.

“Uh, very. I know her cutiemark isn’t the same as yours, but sometimes I just can’t say no to the mare. Why?” I felt the sudden need to massage my bruises.

“Applejack… is kinda like a force of nature. I would still be a ‘virgin,’ the things Aurora and Noise did for me discounted, if I had it my way. To be quite honest with you, I have never met anypony as… energetic as she is. And not like, in the personality way, like she can just keep going. Forever. At least twice, it really just came down to who just couldn’t keep going. And I lost once.” Pulse blinked, then her face started to warp into a barely contained smile

“… C-can I get that video?” I scrunched up my snout and couldn’t help let out a half-laugh half-snort.

“You’re nasty! Geez. That’d be like, hours of footage. Besides, she’s shy enough about PDA as it is. She would never go for it.” Pulse cracked up and shook her head.

“Ha ha! I’ve missed you, ya know that? I can’t believe you found a mare that could beat you at your own game. She must really be something…” Pulse sighed and shook her head. “Volt is gonna be pissed when she finds out Marevelous beat her again.” That caught my attention.

“She knows?” Pulse raised her shoulders and held her hooves out to either side.

“Sort of? She knows it’s you in the black suit, and she can tell you have a thing for Marevelous just based on the fights we’ve seen. I knew better of course, and… well, you know how Aurora is, so she got it out of me, but nopony else should know, and I know she wouldn’t tell anypony. But when Volt sees you together, she’s gonna figure it out. That mare has an um… unique body. Based on what little I’ve seen of how you interact with each other, it would be kinda hard to hide.” I frowned.

“Goddess damn it, Aurora… Okay, so Volt last for sure. Let’s go talk to Aurora and see what she thinks, then we’ll work from there.”

“Sure, what’s up?” From seemingly out of nowhere stepped the white-blue pegasus. I held up a hoof toward her and looked back at the closed coffeeshop door.

“Excuse me, what the fuck?” She pulled Pulse’s seat out and then flew on her lap. I could hear the sounds of her ice freezing somewhere, but I couldn’t see where. Based on the face Pulse was making, I could only make assumptions.

“A-aura, p-please♥” Ah. And that would be what she was doing.

“I have had the hardest time making her less shy about us. She told me to hide because she thought you were a customer or something. I’ve been practicing with those reflective ice mirrors lately, so I can hide just about anywhere. My little Pulsy-wulsy is just so afwaid of what other ponies think♥” Aurora turned around and played with Pulse’s cheeks, and then turned back to me like nothing happened.

“Okay. You could’ve come out at any point before now. Also, could you like, not do what you’re doing?” I waived my hoof in a circle around them and she lowered her eyes at me and smiled. She turned to Pulse without breaking eye contact with me, and then gave her a deep tongue kiss. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore and turned away while strategically crossing my hind legs. Aurora let go, Pulse took a deep breath, and before she had a chance to complain or wipe her mouth, more ice cracked and she flinched.

“Absolutely not. You interrupt my play time and ask me to put away my toys? Never. Anyways, I could have, but I wanted to hear what you had to say to your most trusted mod. I could’ve teased it out of her later, but I figured it’d be easier this way.” I scrunched up my mouth and leaned over to look at Pulse.

“I can see why this may be difficult for you. So uh… is this a regular thing or…?” Aurora shrugged.

“Kinda? You know how I am. And for the record, I have fucked half the gang. Probably like, sixty, maybe sixty five percent in total. I’m still working down the list. Just the single ponies though, I promise. Oh! And all the mods. This one is needy though, so she’s been demanding more of my attention lately♥ I’m still mad that you didn’t let me take your V-card though.” I rolled my eyes and shrugged.

“Well, I don’t have it anymore, so that’s a moot point. So? You were listening in. Anything? And will you please stop whatever it is you’re doing to Pulse already? You’re going to make a mess.” She raised her snout and smirked.

“You know exactly what I’m doing. But fine, whatever. Two is probably enough anyways.” Pulse gasped and then wrapped herself around Aurora’s lower back breathing hard like she’d just run a marathon. “Personally? I’d still screw you, but that’s mostly because you’re pretty. Nothing special in the bulk department, but you’ve definitely got it going on in the basement and the face, which is what really matters. That’s a video that would sell well, let me tell you. As far as the romantic side goes, I’m afraid I’m just not that into you. It’s been a long time since I’ve had feelings like that for anypony, save for this little faggot.” She wrapped a wing around Pulse’s head and smiled at her in a… genuinely warm way, which is more than weird for the ice queen.

“Fuck you. Goddess, you’re the worst. You know I hate that word.” Pulse looked legitimately angry, but Aurora didn’t flinch. She leaned down and kissed her head, then I heard the sound of ice again, and Pulse sat up straight underneath her.

“Later honey, Goosey is trying to be a good coltfriend. Of course, if he wanted to plow another pasture before he settles on that plot, I think we could certainly provide tracts of land…” Suddenly, Celestia’s words echoed in my mind. “Hard catering to two heads, isn’t it?” I adjusted my crossed legs and contemplated that.

“Good goddess, I have forgotten what it was like to be around you. How I don’t already have a few bastards, I will never know. And dad was around ponies like you for most of his life. How do I not have siblings? Geez. So, first of all, no, I will not be doing that to her. Or you, or anypony before you twist my words into some kind of innuendo, you damn nympho. Second, when was the last time you got checked for diseases? I’ve been told you picked up your old job and I need to know that you haven’t been spreading anything around to any of those kids.” Finally, Aurora’s face dropped and she frowned at me, half lidded with an eyebrow raised.

“Goose, I am a professional, you should know better. I get tested almost weekly at this point. I haven’t been spreading anything to anypony. Besides, I don’t do anything to anypony who isn’t legal, and I mean it when I say she’s been taking up my time lately. I’ve had two clients in the past few weeks, and I made one video for the site. Most of my other activity has been with her.” She huffed and rolled her eyes, then leaned back into Pulse, who was then forced to lean back in the chair. “You would think that after four years, you would know me pretty well.” I sighed.

“I do know you well, and I ask because I am concerned. For better or for worse, you are the most shameless pony I know, and even being who I am, you still managed to take advantage of me. I know that you know what you’re doing, it’s the bad habits you cause in other ponies that I take issue with. You are a terrible influence, and we’ve had this conversation before. Anyways, we can talk about that more later. Topic at hoof, who has a thing for me, and who will support my decision?” Aurora sighed and then finally unseated herself from Pulse. She made a chair out of her ice, too lazy to go get a real one, and then took a seat at the table. Pulse yelped and her body went limp, and suddenly I need to adjust my legs again. Aurora put her elbows on the table and put her hooves on her head.

“Well, you try having shame when your special talent is pleasuring ponies.” She shook her head and sighed, then rested it on her hoof. “I’m trying to get better, alright? This stupid thing is just… hard to fight.” I couldn’t help but feel her tug on my heart strings. Head over hooves for a colt much older than her at the age of twelve, does something she regrets and gets her cutiemark for it. Her parents were disgusted by her, disowned and kicked out, lived on her own for most of her life, getting by doing what she does best and becomes a shell of a pony addicted to anything and everything, only to get caught up on the wrong side of Manehattan one day. She still might be part of that ring to this day were it not for the job we took from the Azraels. Or worse. Aurora sat up straight again and put her hooves behind her head, back to business after a rare moment of sincerity.

“Heat won’t care, she’s even more of a fruit than carpet cleaner over here. Petal will be upset, but she’ll probably support you. She hooked up with one of the younger guys recently, so this might just be good for her. They’re cute together. He’s a little on the small side though, sweet kid. Volt is gonna be some kinda mad. She screamed your name when I finally took her card. You know, she had me mold one of my ice sculptures-”

“Stop! I don’t know, and I don’t want to know. I should never have let you do that to me in the first place. Goddess, that’s creepy. Why did you tell me that? I could’ve lived my whole life without this information and been fine. There is a reason why I’ve never asked about your sex lives, I don’t know how I forgot that.” Aurora shrugged.

“Hey man, a mare wants what a mare wants. It was my job to give her what she wanted, and I was capable of doing exactly that. Besides. She’s just one of the ponies that has one of those. I made several and ended up selling out.” I put my elbows on the table and hid my face in my hooves.

“This must be how celebrities feel when they find fan art of themselves on the internet. I never asked for this.” Aurora patted my shoulder.

“You did, actually. You asked specifically for who had a ‘thing’ for you, so I’m telling you. Petal has one too. As does Whirl, who will also be very upset about this. Probably as much, or more than Volt, you know the kind of temper she has. This is entirely your fault.” She said all this with a kind smile on her face, and I wasn’t sure if she was making fun of me for it or not.

“Of course, that’s just the mods. I mean, I don’t even have to tell you how bad it would be if Noise was still around, she was still devastated months after you told her it was over. She’d likely try to kill that mare. Also, can I just say goddess damn, she has some kinda body. I’m not usually one to get worked up, but that… you found something special.” I put a hoof over my mouth.

“Do… do I say thanks in this situation?” Aurora nodded.

“Thank the goddess for the bountiful ass you’ve been gifted, that’s for sure. I know you weren’t serious, but I was definitely excited at the prospect of having Marevelous to play with before she actually beat the shit out of us. Anyways, the fillies will likely mostly not take this well, but I think the colts will either not care or be okay to even happy for you since that means their chances with the girls just shot up drastically. Your uphill battle is definitely going to be convincing the straight mares and what few of the bi boys I have yet to straighten out completely to go along with this, and unfortunately for you, that’s like, forty, thirty-five percent of the gang. Oh, and here’s a fun fact; I have turned all the colts mostly away from home plate.” I sighed. As messed up as she was back then, Aurora would’ve gotten her the moment they were alone together, provided we won. Thank the goddess we lost. Also, damn. That’s impressive.

“Really? Even Entendre?” Aurora raised a brow and smirked with her eyes closed.

“Especially Entendre. Previous to lip licker over there, he was my project. I figured if I was going to see if I could fight my cutiemark, I might as well try and break his. It took a lot of work and me doing some things I regret, but eventually I got him. I thought I was the master of my profession, but that kid taught me things I never thought possible. At the very least, he now accepts female clients too. Earns significantly more these days. I never knew some mares just wanted a tiny boy to play with, but I suppose I’m one of them.” I blinked. More information I could’ve lived without.

“Oh-kay then. I thought we had the Velvet Box closed, didn’t we?” Aurora shrugged.

“You can kill the location, but the business will never die as long as ponies have the instinct to breed. Velvet himself is dead, but there is a new place and I need you to leave it alone. A few of us work there, and if we have any hopes of making it on our own, I have to be able to work. The unfortunate truth is that I still bring home the most bits, and we are damn sure going to pay you and Mister C back. I wasn’t lucky enough to go to school, but these kids sure as hell are, and I refuse to let this debt stand.” While I really hate the idea of that, I can’t tell if regression or growth on her part. On the one hoof, she’s still selling her body. On the other hoof, she’s doing it to provide for the gang and trying to get out of it. I suppose… I sighed and shook my head.

“As long as you’re keeping the rest of them away from that world, I won’t intervene. I still don’t like it though.” Aurora threw her hooves up and wrapped a foreleg around Pulse.

“Oh, come on, you know you enjoy my work. Besides, I’ve set some rules. Nopony is allowed around the house, and only those with cutiemarks related to the business are allowed to work it. This one takes care of my own moments of weakness, so things will eventually get better. I’ve even got some ideas on how to keep using my cutiemark without doing my job, I just… need some time to get the details worked out.” I raised a brow, but after seeing that cheap smile of hers I let it go.

“Alright, fine, whatever. If you think your idea is going to work, then I suggest you get it refined and put into action sooner rather than later. You know how my dad felt about those kinds of operations, and the more time I spend with normal ponies, the more I think we really do need to cut the shit and go clean entirely.” Aurora nodded.

“And you’re right of course, but we’re not in a good position to just quit immediately yet, so give us some time to wean off it. Oh… and uh… speaking of, my uh… m-my luck finally ran out.” I don’t think I’ve ever seen Aurora blush, but I think I was less concerned about that and more the existential dread of hearing those words. Four years. I’ve been waiting to hear it for four years, and finally, it happened. I let out a deep, heavy breath and put my elbow on the table and rested my face on my hoof.

“Okay. Do you know whose it is? What are you going to do with it?” She let her eyes fall to the floor and started clicking the tips of her hooves together.

“Funny enough, I actually think it’s Entendre’s. Most of my clients have been mares lately, and he was the last stallion I let do that in a few months. We still get together every other week to practice new tricks and I guess… my body decided to work right for once. I… never thought I would… g-get the chance, ya know? I always wanted one, but I was broken so I didn’t think it was possible anymore. Ha… Life finds a way, right?” I let out a breath and brought the shaky mare in. I wiped her tears away and rubbed at her back, and after a little while, she managed to recompose herself.

“How far along are you?” I asked.

“About a month and a half. I uh… I think it happened a little after we moved here, actually.” Well, what would dad do? It would be one thing if they weren’t a decade apart in age, and another if she wasn’t still working. That kid’s barely seventeen, and he’s still in school. He doesn’t need a father’s responsibilities thrown on him right now, provided he could even rise to the position. What kind of foal is going to come from two prostitutes? If she keeps it, how doomed is this baby to follow in their hoofsteps? Cutiemarks typically follow a trend, and if the Apples aren’t proof of hereditary cutiemarks, what is? It’s not as if the gang having babies is new, but when that happened, dad would exile the parents and move them to another city entirely. The family is everything, never forget. He said it over and over, and he meant it. They just managed to get the guys settled, and Aurora is one of the mods, I can’t just kick her out… I scratched at my mane and leaned back in my chair.

“Goddess damn it, you picked an awful time for your biology to work. I’m going to have to think about this. If nothing else though, I take back what I said earlier, you must quit. I don’t care who’s making what money, you are not the most important pony in your life anymore. Does he know?” She bit her lip and shook her head. Well, that’s a relief.

“Okay, don’t tell him. He is… too fragile to be a father, at least right now. He deserves to know at some point, but it was hard enough to convince him to go to school in the first place, I will not have anypony dropping out in the event he decides to turn a new leaf and become a stallion. Who all knows about this?” Aurora couldn’t bring herself to look at me, so Pulse took her in her hooves and answered for her.

“Just me. I caught her running to the bathroom to puke a few times last week, and when she didn’t seem sick, I finally got her to tell me what’s going on. I know the rules, but since she’s one of the mods, I figured you’d want to deal with this yourself. Before you told me what you were planning today, I’d thought about bringing this up to you. I have little doubt ponies aren’t gonna think you’re spreading seeds when she gets too obvious to ignore. Volt asked me if she thought Aurora was getting fat yesterday, so this is gonna hit pretty quick.” I put my hoof on my forehead and sighed.

“This is not the kind of shit I wanted to deal with today. Why didn’t you tell me as soon as you knew?” Aurora swallowed and finally looked at me. Before she even had a chance to say anything, I already knew. The forward, strong mare that had pulled herself out of the pit was nowhere to be found, and here in those wet blue eyes was a filly thought dead for almost two decades. Oh goddess, she’s so scared she doesn’t know what to do with herself.

“I’m sorry, okay!? The years of abuse and unsafe practice made me really believe I was barren from the start! I’m almost thirty Goose, I’ve been doing this for fifteen years! I… I… I was afraid, alright? I don’t know what to do! I don’t think I can be this kid’s mom, and I don’t want it to not have a father, but… but… Entendre just… We don’t love each other, and he’s destined to end up with a stallion someday. I’ve… I’ve thought about adoption, but… but it’s mine, and… and I don’t think I’ll get another chance, and I…” I took hold of her face and made her look at me.

“Aurora. Calm down. I am not mad. It will be okay.” She broke again and fell into me wailing and holding on as tightly as she could.

“What am I gonna do? How am I supposed to do this? I can’t be a mom! It deserves a father!” she went on and on. The back of the store had an extra room where this building had once been a home, and Pulse had taken up residence in there to keep up with my affairs for the gang and keep me in the loop. While Aurora cried and Pulse comforted her, I sat in deep thought.

In all the time I watched dad be the boss, I don’t think I was ever around when this came up. I helped move new families into homes a few times, and I’ve relocated ponies before after the fact, but making the decisions he always did in private. The first thing to consider is what is best for the child. Aurora is not the first prostitute in either Shark Tooth or the Boneheads to be retired for the sake of their kids. Part of the reason dad was so adamant about making sure minors were treated properly was because his own father was particularly neglectful, and he didn’t want a repeat of that. Even if he wasn’t a good guy, he always tried to do what he thought was best for me, even to the point of trying to stay out of my life. Nopony should go without their parents if it can be avoided, but in this situation… I don’t know that the parents aren’t going to be a detriment to the growth of the child.

The next thing would be Aurora’s feelings. Her body was ruined by all the drugs that were in her system for most of her teen years, and it was a miracle she made it through them alive. In truth, it shouldn’t be possible for her to have foals still since she was stabbed through the uterus once when she was very young, and in theory, that scar should prevent an embryo from attaching. But then again, Rainbow exists, and her mother suffered a similar wound, so… that’s that. The four years of detox and working a… well, less ‘harmful to her’ job may have just made her healthy enough for this.

She clearly wants to keep the baby, but then comes the question of how she’ll feed it. There is a chance this could happen again if she keeps selling herself, and she stopped going to school in sixth grade. Her skills include fighting, sculpting, fucking, and slaying, so she’s either in for one dangerous job, a job with severe negative consequences, a combination of both, or she tries her hoof at marketing her powers which… may very well work. If that was her idea, then maybe we can do something with it, but we need more information for that.

Then, there’s Entendre. Fruity little unicorn kid with a similar story to hers, and likely why she managed to get him to open up to her enough to try mares out in the first place. At least a few times by the sound of it. I don’t actually know if he doesn’t have feelings for her, so that’s something we need to find out. Then there’s that cutiemark. I would think it is difficult to interpret one Mars symbol piercing another as anything other than his talent is pleasing males, but how else could he use that? And the real question; could this kid become masculine enough to play the role of father? Dad always used to say responsibility makes a stallion, but he’s about as effeminate as they come. When I first met him, I thought he was a girl, and maintained that belief for weeks until one of the guys found out the truth the hard way. Could he survive being a parent with a mare ten years older than he is? I just can’t say.

Finally, there’s what the kid would become. How do you explain to your child that your cutiemark is a dripping wet peach and what that means? Or that your cutiemark attracts you to other males? Would it be ruined in a family like that? Could a family like that survive together? Neither of them are educated, and only in the last month did Entendre start going to school again, so what then? Will this kid grow up thinking its parents are hypocrites for telling it to do things they never did? And understanding what happened to them and how they grew up and what their lives were like…

I shook my head and finally laid back on the bed. I’d probably spent a few hours thinking here and I could never find an answer to anything. No wonder dad always thought on this crap alone, there are so many factors to consider… So much for finding a place today. We need to tell the rest of the mods about this. She can’t hide it for much longer, and Volt’s already suspicious. They know I’ve done stuff with her before, everypony will point their hooves at me, even if she is a whore. Well, if I’m going to rip off the bandaid, I might as well do it all at once.

“Goose?” Pulse asked. Aurora had fallen asleep on her and started to stir.

“Hmm…?” I took a deep breath and sat back up.

“I have made a decision. Call the mods and get everypony here. They need to know, and they need to know everything. When the kaiju are done with and I am truly free for a while, we’ll get you sorted out. For now, I still have other ponies I’m responsible to, and the mare I want to spend my life with is likely eating all our candy waiting for me at home.” Awake now, Aurora drew her knees up to her chest and curled up.

“D-do I really…?” I put a hoof on her shoulder and nodded.

“Yes. Whether it be a mistake or something out of your control, or even your fault, you have to own it. If you really want to raise this baby yourself then you have to change for your child. I… am no better, and in a year or so, I’ll probably have my own kid. So we’ll get better together, and the gang will have to get better too. And one day, we can look back on this as the beginning of the turning point. And if we’re lucky, the kids might just turn out alright.”

---

“You’re pregnant!?” came in unison. As it would have the most immediate effect on them, I figured Aurora needed to go first.

“I can’t believe that. It don’t make no sense. What about yer scar? Did that get magically fixed or somethin’?” Petal asked. Her accent is a little different from Applejack’s, probably because she’s from and even further south part of Palomino, the Galvastallion island just off the coast, but that doesn’t make it any less strange to hear in somepony else’s voice.

“No, it’s still there. I guess it just didn’t stop it this time…” Aurora explained. Petal shook her pink and violet mane and tapped her back hoof on the ground impatiently.

“Okay, so whatever, this happens sometimes. Do you know who the father is? It’s not you, is it G?” Heat asked. I shook my head.

“No. The father, if you’ll believe it, is thought to be Double Entendre.” Heat squinted at me.

“Really? That kid is gayer than I am, and that’s saying a lot. I’ve slept with at least half the mares in the gang. And all of you. Well, except for G of course, but I’ve only had one or two stallions in me.” I contemplated that. I had to know.

“Quick unrelated question, have all the mods slept with each other and not me?” The girls looked from one to another and eventually nodded. I put my hoof over my mouth, took it off to speak, stopped and returned it, took it off again, and then put it back.

“Huh. Today I learned. I suppose that’s one form of birth control in the gang. Kinda glad that’s out in the open now though. I guess I don’t have to hide it anymore if everypony already knows,” Pulse said. Heat nodded.

“About you two? Yeah, we know. I’m pretty sure we all know how shy you are, so we just never brought it up. And it’s Aurora after all, nopony wanted to spoil the one-off romantic relationship you two have. I’m honestly more surprised about you three. I knew Pulse was gay and Aurora is Aurora, but I thought you girls were like, slightly normal. For the Boneheads anyways.” Volt looked away, Petal scratched at her face and decided the ceiling was the most interesting thing right now, and Whirl looked down.

“The gang uh… opened me up to new ideas,” Volt confessed.

“Pisces is sweet and all, but neither of us really know what we’re doin’ so… I asked fer help from those with more experience… and you know, one thin’ leads ta ‘nother, and now I’m much better than I was,” Petal explained.

“I uh… yeah, I have no excuse. You never came after me like I wanted so I just kinda… sampled around. Imagine how disappointed I was when I learned about the game,” Whirl admitted. Well. This is awkward.

“Oh-kay. Talk about worst ‘harem’ ever. Did this happen like… recently, or has this been going on for a while? We’ve all been together for a few years now, so…” Aurora raised a hoof.

“It’s been off and on for most of them. Petal has only been exploring as of getting with Pisces earlier this year, everypony else hooks up on occasion when they get either horny or lonely. So… like, once or twice a month. Between the six of us anyways.” I blinked.

“And today I learned.” Volt returned to facing the table and put her hooves together.

“So, this is all cool and whatever, but what are we doing with her now? I think we all know the rules, but is it fair to just… kick Aurora out like that? She’s not just some low-level grunt like the last ones were, she’s kinda important around here.” I shook my head.

“No, I don’t think that’s a good idea, especially at the moment. This situation is far more complicated than I have time to straighten out either. For now, until I get all my affairs settled, Aurora will function as normal, save she needs to be treated as a dependent. I trust her, but I also know her, so I need you all to make sure she doesn’t start working again.” Aurora went to object, but Pulse pulled her back.

“Aura, come on. We know better.” The white blue Pegasus sighed and fell back in her chair.

“Fine, whatever.” Aurora leaned on Pulse, and then Whirl gave me a look.

“What do you mean your affairs? Didn’t you come back to deal with her?” I shook my head.

“No, actually, I didn’t.” I took a deep breath. Here we go. “I’m getting married.” As predicted, Volt and Whirl were shocked like this was the most unexpected thing to ever happen, Petal looked a little hurt and Heat was unphased.

“Um, excuse me?” Volt accused. I stared her down.

“I finally found my childhood friend. It took thirteen years, but things… well, things are a lot like they were before. I still love this mare, and over the last month and a half, I’ve come to find out that she feels the same. If I make it through our fight tomorrow, I’ll be proposing on Tuesday, and if I can get a place set up, I’ll have the wedding Wednesday or Thursday depending on how quickly I can get everything arranged.” Whirl stood from her chair.

“No. No, you can’t. We were supposed to… No, why? Are you fucking serious? Is he fucking serious!? Did you know!?” She started pointing hooves at Pulse and Aurora and they both nodded.

“In his defense, Lamni has been after this mare for a long time. And I mean a very long time. She was the purpose of the gang in the first place. Our mission was to find her and, well… we never did,” Pulse explained. Aurora nodded.

“Yeah, I was part of the last team to do any scouting for her before Mister C died. The whole point of the harem scheme was to make him seem unavailable to everypony so there wasn’t any fighting between us. The kinda charisma he has tends to win ponies over and it was an issue before I came up with the idea.” Whirl fell back into her chair and Heat shrugged.

“Eh, I saw this coming. I figured he and Noise were actually going to hook up, but after they broke up, I knew he had somepony else in mind. A stallion doesn’t reject mares left and right for no reason, and Noise definitely got a taste of the G stick, so I knew he wasn’t gay.” I straightened my lips.

“Additional unrelated question, do you all know my sexual history too?” Volt threw her hooves up.

“Some of us were actually interested in you, so maybe somepony told us what it was like after you dumped her. And uh… nopony can escape Aurora forever, I learned that the hard way. But I don’t care about that, what the hell Goose? Didn’t you say we would get a chance? Who even is this mare? Are we supposed to stand by and watch you get hitched to some bitch you picked up in Las Pegasus like some kinda one-night stand that went wrong? Why are you only telling us this now?” Yeah, this was bound to happen. I raised my hooves and then nodded.

“I did say that. And the truth is, I lied to you, and I am sorry. I was depressed and I’d felt like I’d just lost a piece of myself for giving up on her, and I took advantage of you to make myself feel better. I said the same thing to Whirl, and it was around then that Aurora got me. Dad… Ya know, I’d finally gotten to the point where we were good friends, and then… he was gone. When we picked up Noise, I thought she was going to be the one that filled the hole in my heart, and when we didn’t work out, I knew nopony ever could.

Finding Applejack again… was a miracle. Several miracles, all lined up on one another that I never could’ve planned or in my wildest dreams. The mare she became is the one she’d dreamed about, and I… became my father, just like I swore I never would. In this one moment, I was given a chance to turn things around, and you know what? I think I’m doing that. I went from being some gang boss of a dying old mafia to really becoming a hero like I wanted to be when I was a kid.

She’s been there every step of the way, and while I was busy trying to figure out who I am now, she was dealing with some deep seeded issues that came up after we were separated, and now… she’s getting over that. You are all my family. The Familia, the teeth of the shark, my boneheaded idiots. You’re all still important to me and nothing would ever change that. But this… is something more, and she does something for me than nopony else could ever do. She makes me a better stallion. And I love her.

For… reasons out of my control, I couldn’t tell you all my plans early on. And as things went further, I just… couldn’t ever work up the courage to do it. I wrote letters, I tried to have Pulse do it for me, I even went so far as to try and hide it entirely, but… well, I wouldn’t be able to face her as a hypocrite. My new group of friends all have their own issues and are essentially a gang bad kids on their own, but I told them something recently and to my surprise, they all took my advice to heart. They mostly had bad relationships with heir parents, or were involved in accidents that made it seem like they were dead, so I told them to fix that. Just to go talk to them to let them know they’re alive, and they all did it. Even Applejack.

I’m only telling you because I feel like I wouldn’t be worthy to kneel for her if I didn’t live up to my own words, so here I am. I am my father. I didn’t want to be, but every passing day makes me see just how much more like him I’ve become, and this is no different. My mother was a mare he met at some seedy club he owned when he was down almost twenty-five years ago, and he married her a few months later. The only difference here is that I’m at least telling you about it before hoof instead of just showing up with her and demanding your respect.” Before I even knew what happened, a hoof shot across my face and my chair fell over.

“Fuck you. You’re such a piece of shit Goose, goddess, I swear. Whatever, we’ve been doing fine on our own for the last month anyways. I’m done.” A door opened and shut, and when I finally managed to get back to my hooves, Whirl was gone. Well. You were warned.

“Congrats Goose. You have a good life and stay the fuck out of mine. Two goddess damn years I wasted, what in the world is wrong with me…” Volt pushed herself up and then quickly found her way out the door. At least she didn’t attack me physically. Next I finally caught Petal’s eyes, but she looked away from me as fast as she could.

“I uh… I’m h-happy fer ya. G-good luck Goose!” She was sobbing before she could make it out the door and tripped on her tail when she exited. Even more embarrassed, she bolted away crying harder than before.

“So uh… wazzat a good punch or what?” Heat asked, giggling to herself a bit. I nodded.

“Yeah. Yeah it was. Well, anything? No unrequited feeling crushed, no open adoration lost, or respect tossed out the window?” The red mare shrugged.

“Not particularly? I’ve kinda got the gay pretty bad, and I think I’m the only mod who was formally hired at first, so… yeah. I was never really that into you.” I massaged my cheek and raised an eyebrow.

“That into me?” Heat rolled her eyes.

“Okay, so maybe I own one of those toys Aurora made, and maybe I liked you at least a little bit in the beginning, but you’re… I don’t know, I see you almost like my dad, ya know? Except without all the abandonment and the drugs. You took care of me in ways I didn’t know I needed to be taken care of, and I have a sense of humor again. Sure, it’s a little weird that you’re younger than me and all, but I don’t know that you being like your dad is really a bad thing. A lot of these ponies didn’t have good father figures or parents in general, I know at least a few of us were abused by our fathers sexually or otherwise, and you kinda put stallions in a better light for us.

Does it sting a little to know that somepony else has your heart? Yes, yes it does. But I knew this would happen one day and I’ve already settled it with myself. Petal had already given up and decided to try out Pisces, but I’m sure she’s just upset that the door is closed too. I think Whirl really believed that you would come to her one day, and Volt likely had similar hopes, but I think they already knew what reality was when you and Synchro stared dating. It was never really gonna be our turn, otherwise it would’ve happened by now. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, ya know?”

Geez, even the fruit bat has one. I should’ve never let Aurora do that. Noise either. I can almost guarantee Aurora was thinking of selling adult toys as her other idea, and she will sell a little piece of me if she ever gets it off the ground. Immortalized in silicon. Ugh. I shook my head.

“So very many things I learned today. Talk about keeping your house in order, damn.” I pulled out my phone and checked the time. It was only seven, so if I leave like, now, I can probably still check out the big three places I wanted to before they close. But now it’s nagging at me, and since I already know, I must know.

“Tell me the truth Aurora, do you and Pulse have one too?” Pulse’s face scrunched up and her irises constricted and she turned away from me, hiding behind Aurora. She herself, shrugged.

“You are a blessed stallion, what can I say? I know this may very well make you feel worse, but we call it the G-stick and I plan on trying to sell them and a few other shapes I’ve got in memory. It wouldn’t be like, a nice store, but it wouldn’t be dirty business anymore. In the uh… you know, legal sense.” I clutched my chest over my barely beating heart.

“Goddess damn it.”

Comments

[sykko]

Geez! Talk about a lot to drop in one's lap.

You've really got me rootin' for these other mares to go clean and legit.