• Member Since 23rd Aug, 2015
  • offline last seen Yesterday

KorenCZ11


Average brony obsessing over the main cast with an unhealthy desire to see them in a dark fantasy setting.

T
Source

Koren: "Super is currently undergoing some reconstruction. While the story will continue to see new chapters until it is complete, the earlier chapters in this story are being adapted to my current formatting process. This note will self destruct after reconstruction is complete."


In a different Equestria than the one we know, a virus broke out thirty years ago, causing mutations in ponies in every way imaginable. Some wished to hide their new powers and forms, while others made quick work abusing them, turning into Equestria's first super villains. The Princesses put out an edict stating that those who wish to fight against these Power Ponies who would do evil would be heavily compensated for their work. It's not until many years later that the first true hero would step up on the city stage, sparking a revolution in Manehattan.

This story was inspired by all the Super Heroes and Super Power shows I grew up with, but after some time creating the world and shaping the characters in it, it became so much more. Twists and turns, changes and escalations await inside the world of Sometimes they call me Super. Our heroes all start out alone and come together to form something that no hero alone could do. Follow the excitement through the eyes of our protagonist and more as they try to defend the city they call home. Welcome to Manehattan.

It's dangerous to go alone, take this!
--[WARNING]--
The comments contain spoilers

Chapters (94)
Comments ( 257 )

Interesting start. I think I'll see where this lead.

A little rough, but it has an interesting premise. Will follow.

So let me guess... Applejack will basically become Mistress Mare-velous?

7262146 :ajsmug: To say that you're off the mark would be a generous way to put it. Honestly, If anyone could guess how the story ends at this point, then they've seen my outline. Keep watching, you'll find out.

Awesome story. I'm really interested to see where this ends up going and I can't wait to find out a bit more about the other heroes in the guild. I'm loving it so far; well done.

7482971 :ajsmug: Thank you very much. I'm very proud of it so far and I have the next few chapters planned to do exactly that!

Excitement levels at 100%. Exhaustion levels at 75%. It's a small price to pay for an amazing story.

Hey there. Thanks very much for getting this story (not just this chapter, but the ones before it as well) up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. I have to say, you have been doing a splendid job on the exchanges, emotional content, action, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

7519652 :applejackunsure: I can't honestly say that I feel good when I do things like that to characters in my own stories. *shrugs* I never planned for a real happy story to begin with, but the further I go, the harder it gets to write. Emotionally, anyways. Just you wait. If this chapter hurt, Fluttershy's chapter is brutal. :raritywink:

As always, I appreciate you.

7521210 :ajsmug: Thanks, it's comments like yours that keep me going on this. I typically get new chapters out on Sundays when I post my blog, so look out for those if you're intrested in updates on my life (also, story announcements are made there).

As much as it takes inspiration, I do have a dynamic outline that I wrote in the beginning that really fules fleshing out a chapter. I enjoy writing it, and the positivity from you guys is really helpful in my drive to get something finished and edited, even improve as I go.

:twilightsheepish: Thanks again, and I hope you enjoy what I have planned next.

Hello there. Once again, the emotional content, action, exchanges, wrap-up for one story and set up for more stories are all well done in all the right places. I'm definitely going to be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

Dude... How do I even...? I've read a few sad stories that were sad for the sake of being sad to make people sad, but this trumps all of them in terms of real emotional kick and connection. I almost cried. I don't cry. I make jokes when I feel the tears coming 'cause being sad sucks, but... wow. I don't have a lame pun or anything to put here. That was amazing.

Also: Blood Orange, you son of a pudding. You committed crimes due to your sadness at the death of a family member, believing a hero to be a murderer. What delicious irony; become a mass murderer to kill an accidental "murderer" and rid yourself of what remaining family you have left. Congrats, dude. You win the "I suck at life" award, as well as the "world's biggest tantrum" trophy. Enjoy.

7537204 :pinkiecrazy: (I live to make you feel internal pain!)
:derpytongue2: Thanks as always.
:applejackunsure: But uh, you shouldn't be so hard on uncle B. Losing a baby can mess with a person's head pretty bad. My brother's first child was still born and he was depressed for months (you know, until the next one came out smiling a year later). I honestly think that the death of all your family at once with a place to point your finger warrants a broken mind and a little vengeance. It's not much of an excuse, but hey, it's at least "justified" in terms of motive.

7537050 :raritywink: Hisashiburi! Thanks man. I'll try to keep it up.

7538556 I know. Blood went a little insane and, to be honest, I'd probably do the same if my prospective family died so horrifically. I was angry at him because he could be a stand-in for any real person who was pushed just a bit too far, which makes him a great character in my book: definable characteristics, but still vague enough for us to accidentally project a real person onto him.

As a side note, I think that good ol' Uncle B's forsaken copying power is gonna become a massive Chekhov's gun later. And (it was probably ridiculously explicit and I just missed it by being a doof) I think that his power lay in his impossibly reflective mirror. I dunno, that's just the feeling that I get. I'm no doubt completely incorrect, probably not even playing ball in the same park (what with the fact that the virus could not possibly affect inanimate objects), but that's what it seems like to me right now.

7558559 :raritywink: You caught me. I'm a fan and creativity only goes so far. Dio brando is best pony.

Hey there. Thanks greatly for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. Once again, great job on the exchanges, emotional content, action, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

Oh dear. It seems that nobody - sorry, nopony will be safe from emotionally (and likely physically) traumatic back stories explaining the origins of their superpowers. Sorry, Rarity... hey, wasn't that your lost innocence I just saw flying by outside the window?

Still can't wait to see what the other two - Twilight and Fluttershy - possess in the way of abilities. Fluttershy's display of knife play in an earlier chapter cleared nothing up for me, although it was awesome. The only obvious one is Pinkie with her super speed, and we already know Rarity and Applejack's traits.

Can't help but wonder about Rainbow Dash. She hasn't even been mentioned or hinted at yet, unless she's the crow or the power pony monster living in the basement.

All in all, an amazing way to set up for conflict later on. I am waiting in eager anticipation for events to unfold, even though I'm gonna miss literally every single reference to other fictional series in this story.

7574579 :derpyderp2: Miss the references! Dear god, you can't! At the very least, go watch this youtube video to get 90% of all the jokes I'll have pinkie make when she's with Rarity. You can also check out the show here if your internet/data rates allow. It's great. And convoluted as shit. But that's what makes it so amazing. That link starts at the beginning, and the scene above is from the second half of the 'third' season. The title to this chapter is a play on the title of the fourth season of the same show.

:ajsmug: Flutters is definitely the character I like to pick on the hardest when it comes to my dark backstories, but at the same time, I also like to give her the most interesting powers. There should be an explanation of what she can do eventually. It may be a while though. We have a lot of ground to cover before then.


:trollestia: Lol, Dash. Kek kek kek, goes the wolf. Oh the plans I have for that one... Emotional trauma will very much be a thing across the board, and it is the main motivation for just about every gen 2 Hero in this story, with the idea that Red Hoof and company are Gen 1. Some of them are still alive too, so who knows who might show up in the future? Only time will tell there...

The random capitalizations really throw Trixie off...

7591616 :applejackunsure: Would you mind pointing out where? I do that sometimes, and don't always catch it when I read through again.

7593660

In a different Equestria than the one we know, a virus broke out Thirty years ago causing mutations in ponies in every way imaginable. Some wished to hide their new powers and forms, while others made quick work abusing them, turning into the Equestria's first Super Villains. The Princesses put out an edict stating that those who wish to fight against these Power Ponies who would do evil would be heavily compensated for catching a villain. It is not until nine years later that the first true hero would step up on the city stage, Sparking a revolution in Manehattan.

Also "superhero" and "supervillain" are usually one word, or at most hyphenated.

7593719 :ajsmug: Thanks. I hardly ever look at things I've already written unless I'm checking continuity, so the story description would have gone under the radar.

Not really sure I can agree with Rarity on Applejack being an "ass." Sure, her anger was getting the best of her but what did she really expect? AJ doesn't have the knowledge that Rarity has when it comes to the team and this group's objective so AJ has to take everything at face value. Not a whole lot of good feelings to be had about this group when Twilight seems to get miffed at every little thing her group does that could "reveal" anything and one of the members has killed over 50 families. Not individuals, like the heroes and cops involved, but their families too.

This situation feels sort of like a staffing agency telling you they have a job lined up for you do, but until you agree to do said job they won't tell you what company it is, where it is located, or what you will be doing, but you get a little info on your employees and one of them is a mass murderer.

I know some people would sign up anyway with the whole mysteriousness of it all being very intriguing and that's okay. For me personally though? If I were AJ I wouldn't be signing the contract

7603189 :applejackunsure: That's actually not too far off of what I was going for. Really, it's pretty close. It's a pain to not know what exactly you're being asked of, but at the same time, you feel like there's more going on here that you need to know. It's more or less a lose-lose situation with no loop holes. Provided I can get the next one done in time, this should all be cleared up by chapter 12 / HS:IV. Between the five, Twilight probably has the most trust issues here, and with good reason.

7629333 :applejackunsure: I uh... I guess... did you like it?

Not much I can say other than great job on this Pinkie's story. Once again, the exchanges, action, emotional content, origin story wrap-up and future chapter set-up are all well done in all the right places. I particularly liked all of them comforting each other. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

Not much I can say other than great job on this chapter. The exchanges, emotional content and future chapter set-up were all well done in all the right places. I particularly liked the little Shout Out to the IDW comics. Well, on to the next chapter.

Again, excellent job on the exchanges, emotional content, action and future chapter set-up in this chapter in all the right places. I particularly liked the reasoning for putting the team together.

7664666 :derpytongue2: Gotta pay respect for the mirrors Arc, it was my favorite. How can you not like seeing Celestia in battle mode on fire? She's practically Talonflame in a fight.

Gonna get to the action after this, I'm willing to bet. Not that there was ever a departure from action if I'm going to be perfectly honest, what with all the tragic back stories heavy on accidental and intentional murder and exploitation of fantastical abilities. Accidents.

Only two nitpicks here, really. I'm normally not inclined to point these out because I'm used to other people making these mistakes in their stories, but yours are always so perfectly edited that absolutely any mistake becomes incredibly jarring and obvious.

“And I can get victims and VIPs out of sticky situations in a flash!” Pinkie exclaimed. It's more often than not we need all these abilities to do the jobs we're given...

I spent a few seconds looking at the second sentence in confusion as I couldn't understand why Applejack's register had changed so suddenly, before reading a bit further and realizing that Twilight was the one who was adding onto what her teammates had just said. So, to shorten everything I just put down: missing inverted commas at the beginning of the sentence, as well as the fact that you should probably start a new paragraph or indent the existing one at the start of her sentence.

“Well, Ah suppose Ah'm glad ta be here, even if it still fells like Ah was kinda roped inta this.

Really small one here, but I put it down anyway. "Fells" seems wrong, even if she is speaking in a really heavy country accent. Actually, putting "fells" in there makes it feel sorta Irish. Imagine that: the Irish-American invincible country superhero magical pony farmer mare. I'd purchase the merch. I think you meant to say "feels."

7664827 :facehoof: Yare yare. Things I specifically check for are ones like this shit right here. Thanks for pointing it out. Man, this makes me mad. I spent about an hour correcting the same friggen mistakes on somebody else's paper for Creative writing too. I'll get that all fixed up in a minute.

Edit: Corrections now present.

And then, Ah realized Ah'd touched a nerve.


Translation: It was at this moment that AJ knew....she fucked up.

Hey there. Not much I can say beyond thanks greatly for getting the next chapter up. I really appreciate you going to the effort. Once again, very good job on the exchanges, emotional content, action and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

Tee hee. Applejack's excuse to Twilight for her late arrival seemed sort of meta to me, kinda like the "Duke and Dimwit" (I think that's the name) segment from BioShock Infinite where Elizabeth remarks that the newest puppet show model had been delayed 3 times. If it was deliberate, I love it.

As for the crow, you had me bouncing all over the place. At first the description of her abilities made me believe that she's this Equestria's version of a ghoul (from Tokyo Ghoul, not the medieval kind). Then I got so lost at the beginning due to the frantic pace of my reading that I thought she was the beast. I spent a few paragraphs believing that before interactions between her and Applejack were intertwined with both of them dodging attacks from the beast, which would have made her powers very awkward to say the least. Then, once I finally understood her abilities fully I immediately thought "Oy! Ain't thet the lil' ol' Missy from... um... CRISIS: Equestria! Yeah, thet's it. Whassernaym? Red Velvet or some such." Even if you've never read that story before, her powers were replicated here almost to a T. It was probably entirely unintentional; it's ludicrously difficult to come up with a new super power, and often you discover that it already exists after you've already gotten yourself hyped up about it. It was just weird to read about them fighting Red Velvet in this story. So odd.

Loved this chapter. My misconceptions and misunderstandings regarding some of the stuff here made me laugh. Even when I probably should have been wincing.

7685508 :ajsmug: I find this funny as
1) I'm not really into any kind of FPS game, really most first person games in general, so my experience with bioshock is about eighteen minutes into bioshock 2 before I got bored. (I really tried to like them because I know a lot of them have great stories, but it's just not my kind of game. I love dark souls, as much as I complain about it, but I can't stand skyrim. Shrug.jpg)
And
2) Every fanfic I've ever read is in my library on this site, so I've never even heard of the one you mentioned. The crow's powers are actually heavily based on [Deadman Wonderland] and not much else. I can see the similarities to a kagune now that I think about it though. Her powers are more along the lines of just being able to control her blood freely though, and not 'very specific' to what all she can do... as long as she has the blood for it. I believe the phrase she uses is 'as if I were a unicorn or some shit' when talking about it.
Of all the characters, she's the one who has the most vulgar language, but that's also a part of the personality she has. In any case, I'm glad you liked it. With any hope, things will continue as scheduled, and the next part will be out next Sunday. For that is the day in which we Praise the Sun

7685788 Oh no, I hate first person video games. I can spend about five minutes playing them before I completely lose my mind. I don't know what it is, but they infuriate me. Watching them, however, is a different story. To me it always looks like a movie filmed in one cut with an awkwardly placed arm or weapon jutting out the right side of the screen, which I can live with. I've watched BioShock completed several times over by different people just for the ending of the game and its overall epic feel. Booker may just be a man, but darn is he an unkillable one.

The fanfic I mentioned isn't actually from this site. It resides on Equestria Daily (which I cannot use comfortably because everything about that website confuses me except for their search bar). It's called CRISIS: Equestria and is about the Mane 6 travelling to an alternate universe - of sorts - and finding out about hidden abilities that they possess in this other world while trying to get home before Discord breaks out of his stone prison. Each chapter is FRIKKING long (comparatively) and as a result it's only on its 37th one, having started long before Discord was reformed. I think.

7685916 :pinkiecrazy: I may have to look into that, since Velvet seems like my kinda gal based on the fan art. (I'm attracted to crazy, don't judge me T-T) I checked the first chapter and thought, Five pages, that's not that bad. Then I decided to do a consistency check by looking at one of the later chapters and doing the same... yeah, was not expecting twenty two pages. That's kinda crazy. And I've been that crazy. Still, I definitely might look at that.
:applejackunsure: I don't typically like to watch let's plays or otherwise because I usually give the excuse that I could watch anime in stead, but on the rare occasion I chose to have something like that as background noise, I typically go for game grumps and don't actually 'watch' any part of the video.

Hey there. Not much I can say other than great job on the exchanges, emotional content and future chapter set-up are all well done in this chapter in all the right places. AJ and Luna's chat was quite well done. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

Darn it. Here's to hoping that Applejack can find a loophole or workaround for that brand, otherwise it'll forever be a nuke hanging directly over her head that could be detonated at any time by Luna's nastier side. Or, you know, perhaps she could find a way to remove it. Once again, with feeling: darn it.

If it weren't for the fact that Mother is basically her keeper too, she'd probably be a tyrant by now

Hyuk hyuk. Ah yes, but that could never happen.

Hang on. I just realized: they've got cellphones in this world.
Mind = blown.

7700924 :pinkiecrazy: Kek. Cellphones are first mentioned in chapter 4 by the way. Yeah. Now that you know who was behind it's creation in a more personal way, you begin to understand what its real purpose is. The Princesses have all kinds of tools at their disposal.

7700964 I smell comeuppance with a decidedly moon based alicorn scent. Perhaps also a hint of sudden humility? However this goes, I'm certainly rooting for the branded ones.

Chapter 4. Yay, already missed a small detail.

I bet you were a fan of the Wildcard series.

Again, excellent job on the exchanges, emotional content and future chapter set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked the scenes with Celestia and Twi and the scene at the end of the chapter. I'll definitely be looking forward to more of this as soon as time and inspiration will allow.

7685788 Ahah ! I knew i was seeing a Deadman... huh, a Deadmare in Crow !

Deadman Wonderland was really a good manga....

And i'd like to put to the test some suspicions of mine :

- the Crow is Rainbow, her present wing is Cyan, she know Flutters... (even if i don't remember if she was mentioned in Flutter's backstory, but heh, they can have met in totally different circumstances.....)
- the Crow will join team harmony later, preferably after a few battles with Marevelous.
- the Crow will be, before joining the team, an Arc Enemy, but an event yet to be determined, her 'loyalty' to her current employer will falter. either she is convinced to change sides (unlikely, if it's RD, she'll be as stubborn as Applejack and stick with the contract.), or betrayal from her employer (more likely, a bit cliché, but more likely)...

Well, back to reading, now, two more chapters to read at the time of my reading...

7719018 s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/54/21/fa/5421fae9482c7e3b44e2a105a799c2ce.gif Nopony knows... Awoo00ooo0o0oooo0oo
But really, I haven't actually planned that far out at this moment. Well details, anyways. There's been a skeleton here since I began with really basic ideas, but as to whether any of that is true is yet to be seen.

Darn it. You made Celestia into a fun-loving, lighthearted character who attempts to be invested in her child and is a reasonable authority figure to everyone she knows - including Luna.
Why do you make all my happy in this chapter?

In all seriousness, though, I really like her here. So cute. She's just so endearing, and I have a terribly concealed weakness the size of Jupiter's Great Red Spot for individuals who exist to be kind to others. My third favourite character in this story so far.

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