During the war between Equestria and the Crystal Empire, the mane six get captured. Horrors await, as each of them is 'personally' interrogated by King Sombra.
I can't tell if Twilight is serious or not. She was dead set on hating Sombra earlier, but she had that odd dream talk after. Still even if she was pissed with Celestia, I truly doubt she would completely switch sides like this.
We also have Sombra preparing to deal with the other elements. Their fates will be very dark and very interesting to read.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ... what are you up to, Twilight? Are you really broken or are you going to try to take the Crystal Heart back when you get the chance? Saving her friends, that I can believe but MORE of what she experienced. Brave, really brave.
After the young mare had been escorted out of the Dark Tower, Sombra gazed towards the remaining guards and decreed, "I have an important task for you. As soon as the next shift arrives, you are to instruct them to take the white unicorn and the orange earth pony to the harem quarters. The yellow pegasus is to be dragged to the lowest level of the dungeon. Tell your colleagues to make absolutely sure she is not harmed in any way and put two female guards outside her cell at all time, do I make myself clear? The pink mare will be taken to the town square and chained up to my statue. I have amusing plans for her. Oh … as for the blue pegasus, order the jailers to slice her wings off slowly and painfully and then carry her to the barracks. She is my gift for the hard working stallions in my army. I except that she won't survive the night … if you know what I mean."
Sombra, you monster: you never had any intention of carrying out Twilight's request of not harming her friends if she pleases you. I wonder how she'd react to it ... wait, scratch that, I already know.
This story was going so well too. Why is it villians are always arrogant and/or stupid enough to fall for what Twilight did every time? It's one of the worst cliche's and is rediculous. I'd have just cut off the horns and wings and thrown the Mane 6 to the soldiers to do with as they please. Was actually hoping this story would end with Sombra winning.
a neat little plot twist in my opinion would be twilight somehow gets the necklace and it corrupts her turning her into midnight sparkle or whatever the official nightmare version of her is then she rapes Sombra. HAHA POETIC JUSTICE IS SERVEd you take my flower I take yours
But... now that you've mentioned it, I am starting to wonder whether or not it should be there (considering what I have written so far) I think it is best that I remove it for now, and add it later, should need arise . Don't want to make false promises (for now)
7005460 Just curious, when you said the references were through the roof, did that annoy or delight you? I usually put them in hoping to entertain, and cause I think they fit the story.
Nice setup chapter again. I love how this can still go any direction. You might think of alternate stories from this point on. For instance, 3 different versions of this story. One has Twilight turning things around and the good guys start wining and getting out of their nightmare. Two Twilight does become corrupt and becomes a nightmare Twilight and takes over the domination having become corrupt and tormented like Sombra. Or three Sombra continues to dominate and spreads his darkness through Equestria building his harem (and having one off's like Fluttershy) till he gets his crown jewels of the princess (I could see him dominating Luna in the middle of battle demoralizing the enemy troops).
Seriously the first 6 chapters are really good when compared to most of the other stories on this sight, that there isn't much people can do to top this one. You sir have a talent. Some of the best ones were: -The Destiny of a Forgotten Goddess: An Anthology -Slavery Is Magic. So it's nice to add a third story (although this one isn't currently finished).
I just hope it doesn't end up with the good but unfinished stories like: -The Game of Estrus -Universal Acceptance (still hope for this one)
Now that I think about it even those three different version could have different stories lol. For instance story number two or three could have Luna and Celestia come up with some alternate plan and finally win the war. Discord could get lose and have put a weird spin on things because he doesn't like either side winning fully so he keeps it random till Sombra is forced to deal with him. There are way to many directions to take this. But for a clop fic probably stick to the 3 suggested earlier lol. Any which way you spin this story from here will be very entertaining.
Lol even with the super dark ending of Sombra totally dominating, you can write a Karma ending where he is finally overthrown by his own powerful children from the various mares he had his way with. Eventually Karma always catches up.
7007647 "You sir have a talent." Why, thank you. I am overjoyed whenever I hear that someone (should I say somepony) enjoys the story. I am also pleasantly surprised by all the suggestions I am given. It is awesome to see how different members of the fandom want various things to occur. And such creativity ... The only thing I hope for is that no matter which of the many many possible outcomes happen next and no matter which character one is rooting for (whether it be Sombra, the mane 6, nightmare Twilight etc.) they will still keep on reading when the next chapters come up.
"So it's nice to add a third story (although this one isn't currently finished). I just hope it doesn't end up with the good but unfinished stories like:" Not a chance. Pinkie promise I will update the story regularly until the end, always trying not to take more than 1-2 weeks/chapter. I am extremely determined to finish this, and thanks to the wonderful community we have here (no really, you ponies are the best, I mean it ) I feel so inspired.
7006529 That's what I was wondering about. If anything was somewhat romancy, it could've been the moments Applejack and Rainbow Dash had while and after they got raped.
Just admit it. Twilight will fall in love with King Sombra, that's why there was the romance-tag!
In that case, Twilight could need a pet for herself, how about the mare we already know who is more into mares than into stallions?
OOH LA LA! We got a little kiss scene here! This just makes me want Twilight to develop Stockholm syndrome and actually fall for her captor more!!! With her from going from saying threats to attempting suicide, and then the next thing we see, she seems willing to have sex with him. I say it's a 50/50 chance it could happen. I know I shouldn't get my hopes on that, but hey, I love Twilight and Sombra shippings. In fact, I prefer shipping her with him than that blue haired Flash Sentry. I even f king hate the guy! Man, I hope he's f king dead in this story.
Nice Lion King inference! I saw that! When Scar was saying undisputed, respected saluted, and seen for the wonder I am in Be Prepared! That was just perfect!
8026362 Yes I did. Just like I said to others, I really enjoy hiding little surprises like that here and there ... not just from the Lion King. Good eye!
Pinkie Pie's tone then instantly changed from cheerful to eerily macabre, as she gave the guards an insane stare and commented, "After we are done with this you should come by my place. We will make … CUPCAKES!"
*insane laugher* They should her cupcakes are scrumptious but that batch wouldn't taste well
Well. That just happened.
7004655 And a lot more will happen in the next chapters
7004667 Well normally I dislike rape and torture of the Mane 6. But you sir. You have my full attention!
I can't tell if Twilight is serious or not. She was dead set on hating Sombra earlier, but she had that odd dream talk after. Still even if she was pissed with Celestia, I truly doubt she would completely switch sides like this.
We also have Sombra preparing to deal with the other elements. Their fates will be very dark and very interesting to read.
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ... what are you up to, Twilight? Are you really broken or are you going to try to take the Crystal Heart back when you get the chance? Saving her friends, that I can believe but MORE of what she experienced. Brave, really brave.
Sombra, you monster: you never had any intention of carrying out Twilight's request of not harming her friends if she pleases you. I wonder how she'd react to it ... wait, scratch that, I already know.
I have the feeling that Sombra will pull a Frank Langella moment pretty soon.
Normally the next chapter would be about how Twilight manages to turn the situation around to give the story a good ending.
But I'm not sure if that'll happen.
Besides, has there always been Romance-tag for this story?
please please write about what happens to RD in the barracks. Hawt.
Also jeez the movie references were through the roof in this chapter
This story was going so well too. Why is it villians are always arrogant and/or stupid enough to fall for what Twilight did every time? It's one of the worst cliche's and is rediculous. I'd have just cut off the horns and wings and thrown the Mane 6 to the soldiers to do with as they please. Was actually hoping this story would end with Sombra winning.
7005172 I really hope Twilight fails at what she hopes to do to Sombra. I want Sombra to win by the end of the story.
a neat little plot twist in my opinion would be twilight somehow gets the necklace and it corrupts her turning her into midnight sparkle or whatever the official nightmare version of her is then she rapes Sombra. HAHA POETIC JUSTICE IS SERVEd you take my flower I take yours
7005172 To answer your question: yes.
But... now that you've mentioned it, I am starting to wonder whether or not it should be there (considering what I have written so far)
I think it is best that I remove it for now, and add it later, should need arise . Don't want to make false promises (for now)
7005169 By a Frank Langella, you mean he will become Nixon?
7005460 Just curious, when you said the references were through the roof, did that annoy or delight you?
I usually put them in hoping to entertain, and cause I think they fit the story.
7006533
More Skeletor than Nixon.
Nice setup chapter again. I love how this can still go any direction. You might think of alternate stories from this point on. For instance, 3 different versions of this story. One has Twilight turning things around and the good guys start wining and getting out of their nightmare. Two Twilight does become corrupt and becomes a nightmare Twilight and takes over the domination having become corrupt and tormented like Sombra. Or three Sombra continues to dominate and spreads his darkness through Equestria building his harem (and having one off's like Fluttershy) till he gets his crown jewels of the princess (I could see him dominating Luna in the middle of battle demoralizing the enemy troops).
Seriously the first 6 chapters are really good when compared to most of the other stories on this sight, that there isn't much people can do to top this one. You sir have a talent. Some of the best ones were:
-The Destiny of a Forgotten Goddess: An Anthology
-Slavery Is Magic.
So it's nice to add a third story (although this one isn't currently finished).
I just hope it doesn't end up with the good but unfinished stories like:
-The Game of Estrus
-Universal Acceptance (still hope for this one)
Now that I think about it even those three different version could have different stories lol. For instance story number two or three could have Luna and Celestia come up with some alternate plan and finally win the war. Discord could get lose and have put a weird spin on things because he doesn't like either side winning fully so he keeps it random till Sombra is forced to deal with him. There are way to many directions to take this. But for a clop fic probably stick to the 3 suggested earlier lol. Any which way you spin this story from here will be very entertaining.
Lol even with the super dark ending of Sombra totally dominating, you can write a Karma ending where he is finally overthrown by his own powerful children from the various mares he had his way with. Eventually Karma always catches up.
7007647
"You sir have a talent."
Why, thank you. I am overjoyed whenever I hear that someone (should I say somepony) enjoys the story.
I am also pleasantly surprised by all the suggestions I am given. It is awesome to see how different members of the fandom want various things to occur. And such creativity ...
The only thing I hope for is that no matter which of the many many possible outcomes happen next and no matter which character one is rooting for (whether it be Sombra, the mane 6, nightmare Twilight etc.) they will still keep on reading when the next chapters come up.
"So it's nice to add a third story (although this one isn't currently finished). I just hope it doesn't end up with the good but unfinished stories like:"
Not a chance. Pinkie promise
I will update the story regularly until the end, always trying not to take more than 1-2 weeks/chapter. I am extremely determined to finish this, and thanks to the wonderful community we have here (no really, you ponies are the best, I mean it ) I feel so inspired.
7006529
That's what I was wondering about. If anything was somewhat romancy, it could've been the moments Applejack and Rainbow Dash had while and after they got raped.
Just admit it. Twilight will fall in love with King Sombra, that's why there was the romance-tag!
In that case, Twilight could need a pet for herself, how about the mare we already know who is more into mares than into stallions?
7006542 yeah I thought they were a good thing. They certainly didn't detract from the enjoyment, they were just nice little things to notice
OOH LA LA! We got a little kiss scene here! This just makes me want Twilight to develop Stockholm syndrome and actually fall for her captor more!!! With her from going from saying threats to attempting suicide, and then the next thing we see, she seems willing to have sex with him. I say it's a 50/50 chance it could happen.
I know I shouldn't get my hopes on that, but hey, I love Twilight and Sombra shippings. In fact, I prefer shipping her with him than that blue haired Flash Sentry. I even f king hate the guy!
Man, I hope he's f king dead in this story.
7011887 That's awesome to hear. Really glad you enjoyed them. It's so much fun adding them and such start when they get noticed
Oh Twilight. I see what your doing... You devious bookworm you...
Nice Lion King inference! I saw that! When Scar was saying undisputed, respected saluted, and seen for the wonder I am in Be Prepared! That was just perfect!
7885179 Glad you caught it. I like to season my stories with references to enjoyable movies, books or series
8026362 Yes I did. Just like I said to others, I really enjoy hiding little surprises like that here and there ... not just from the Lion King. Good eye!
*insane laugher*
They should her cupcakes are scrumptious but that batch wouldn't taste well
8692845
Love seeing all your reactions as you go through all the chapters.