Chapter 9: Being the center of attention is awkward
Chapter 9
“Being the center of attention is awkward!”
Danail24: Hey fans of Blind Trust! Sorry it took FOREVEEEER to update, you can read about the reason in my author’s notes if you want. But hey, just so you know I’m willing to get this story done all the way even if it does take a lot of time to update. Besides the next chapter will be much shorter (maybe above 1, 2k w.) so you’ll get to read it sooner!
pre-read by Thule
***
As the door to the small inconspicuous room clicked open, its wing unfolded to reveal the news of the week: the strange outworldly alien creature and her temp Guardian, the Element of Magic herself, Twilight Sparkle. Why was the room so secluded? To avoid the mass attention of the paparazzi who were still being checked for around the perimeter of course!
Just seeing the duo enter threw the reporters’ horns and mouths in a scribbling fit, doing so in a frantic and exuberant manner. There would have been a lot of flashes and pictures taken too if it wasn’t for the strict security to keep them in check. There would have also been a mound of questions the moment the twosome entered but for the same reason they were silent at first.
As the pony and human neared a small chair, the small bipedal creature was sat down with the help of the lavender unicorn helping her find her seat with a vocal nudge. For a moment everything went completely silent as all the equine journalists held their breath, beholding this outlander in all her splendor: her pale furless skin, her thin figure which made her resemble a somewhat scrawny Minotaur cub. Her long mane was the only thing pony like, being tied at the back of its base in a ponytail, it reaching just below her shoulders. Silent but audible murmurs followed, making the interviewed pony and human uncomfortable:
“That’s the strangest alien I’ve ever seen!”
“Well what did you expect? Aliens are supposed to be weird looking!”
“I think we hit the gold mine fellers!”
“It’s very interesting how the Elements of Harmony are always involved in things of such proportion.”
“Wait till all of Equestria reads about it!”
“Uuuuum, excuse me sirs and madams of the press but me and the alien filly are ready now.” Twilight spoke up, breaking their gossiping process.
“Oh, uuuh, yes! Let’s start with a couple of pictures!” One of the reporters stated, taking out his camera.
Being patient, the studious unicorn allowed the press to take as many photos as they liked, varying from the human girl on her own to shots where they were both in. After that, the real interview was underway.
“Excuse us Ms. Sparkle! I’m Bonny Slide from Equestria daily! Your statement leads us to the first questions: How, when and where did you find the alien and how could you tell it was a filly?” A blonde maned pegasus mare was the first to shoot her query, gaining the upper hand over her colleagues.
“It was my friend Rainbow Dash who found said filly in the middle of Ponyville’s marketplace at noon, 3 days ago. She caused quite the panic at first but my friends and I managed to get the townsponies to warm up to her quickly. As to how I determined she was a filly… well her voice indicated it, she sort of looks like one for a human, and she told us herself.” Celestia’s protégé clarified.
“Does the human have a name? How old is she? What about language barrier? Where does she come from?” A very impatient maroon unicorn stallion spewed out four questions at once, not wanting to be left behind.
“Her name is…” Twilight tried but failed to explain when she was interrupted by another reporter.
“Excuse me miss Sparkle, we know that you wished to reply to most of the questions but me and my colleagues were hoping for the filly to at least answer these most basic questions.”
Before the indigo-maned spellweaver had the chance to scold the impudent journalist, Kelly spoke up:
“My name is Kelly Sombermayer. I’m only six years old. I don’t know how but your and my language seems to be identical. The only difference being that mine is called English and yours Equestrian. I came from another world called Earth, from the land of the United States of America, the city of Brooklyn. Once my mother died and it turned out I had no relatives I was taken to the Angel Guardian Home orphanage, and I’ve been living there until I recently appeared here one night while I slept without warning.” The little child gave a short exposition, giving off a few extra details in order to please the news ponies.
All the while as she spoke, the columnists marveled at her innocent filly like voice, the way she held herself with grace, the mature way she spoke and the interesting things she was telling them. Finally a Pegasus mare jabbed one of her associates in the barrel, the act itself jarring the rest of them out of their stupor and they commenced their scrawling upon their wax colored parchments.
“She seems to be quite knowledgeable about how our world works! Do you have anything to say to that miss Sparkle?” The same jabbing Pegasus posed a question of her own.
“Why yes, yes I do! I have taught her quite a bit about our way of life, but most of it she learned from a couple of books I gave her to read in Braille. And yes, somehow while she was in the orphanage she managed to teach herself how to read and she’s become so good at it that she can read books for adults. That also explains her huge vocabulary.”
That statement provoked another intense session of writing. And this is an example of what one of the equine reporters wrote:
… although the human seems to possess the mind set of an ordinary six year old filly , comments from Twilight Sparkle and said human leads us to believe that she is wise beyond her years, having had become a “forced young adult” probably due to leading a difficult lifestyle during her days at one of her world’s orphanages….
“Does she possess magic? If not how do they manage without it?”
“No! Sadly her species have absolutely no magical powers at all. The only magic I have been able to deduce they do have is the magic of their nature and weather which takes care of itself. That has lead me to believe that that magic is similar to the one we’ve encountered in the Everfree forest. As to how they do get around; humans have used their great intellect and imagination to create a worldwide system of technology that is greatly superior compared to our own, using various power sources and maintaining a vast network of communication is called the Internet that helps every human of every nation keep in touch with the rest of their world. It also helps keeping their international relationships peaceful and cooperative.”
‘Now this is what I call news! This’ll be the talk of the month!’ A spectacled stud grinned with fervor in his heart.
“I noticed that the human filly is very mature about many things. How did she come across such complicated matters such as death, and the circumstances regarding orphanhood?” Bonny Slide posed her second question.
That question was the one that really drove a nail through Kelly’s tiny heart. She felt it crease up in a ball like a sheet of red paper as her lips started trembling and her chin muscles started dancing. This caused tears to well up in the orphan’s eyes, as some really painful flashbacks came back to her like, driving into her thoughts like a sledgehammer:
/flashback 1/
A very small brown haired girl with blue eyes had just entered her home after an afternoon of playing in the backyard. She was but a mere three year old with a messy hair that almost reached her shoulders.
“Moooooommyyyyy… mommy?” She called out, going through the rooms.
Even though she was blind, the little miss knew this place like the back of her hand, the position of every couch, every table and every stool known to her.
It was when she heard voices murmuring to each other that she stopped in one place, placing her forefinger against her lips in perplexity. She knew not the owners of the voices! What were these strangers doing in her home?
“Hellooo, who’s here?” the toddler called out warily.
Two pairs of footsteps were then heard; ones that were heavy and loud and the others possessing the distinct tocks of lady shoes.
“Who’s the kid?” A gruff man’s voice asked, bearing a thick Italian New York accent, obviously posing his question to someone else.
“According to the files she’s Kelly Sombermayer, the daughter of the deceased woman.” A cold female voice replied, a calculated and precise note heard in its timber.
“What’s desissy mean? Who are you persons? Is mommy having guests over? Do you know where she is?” young Kelly asked with such an amount of innocence it could give a person diabetes.
“Joy. This will be quite a task to explain.” The woman spoke again even and emotionless.
“I’m Gerald Labrado, a police officer, and this here is Doctor Beatrice Cagni! We got a call about your mom and came over for a visit.” The guy tried his best to keep the touchy situation under control.
“Where is my mommy?” the girl insisted.
“Don’t look at me; you deal with her, officer!” The dame elbowed her companion who just a second ago had glanced over to her.
“*deep sigh* Look kid, your mommy wasn’t feeling well and it seems that she has fallen into a deep asleep. She might be like that for a long time. Since she can’t wake up, we’ll have to send her to a place where they’ll take care of her till she’s better.” The law man stooped down to the child’s level while talking.
“Ya silly! You don’t have to take mommy away! I can go and wake up mommy right now! I always wake her up!” The tot grinned, scampering along to her mother’s bedroom before any of the adults could react.
“No, wait!” The doctor reached out but too late.
Kelly dashed for her mother’s room, opening it swiftly and scurrying to her bed. Feeling her way about, she grabbed a hold of what she recognized as her mom’s hand.
“Hey mommy! It’s me! Rise and shine... some persons here say that you don’t wanna wake up but I know you’re just playing! So how about you wake up and we make some cookies!” the kid brushed her cheek against her parent’s hand lovingly.
However just then she realized how cold it was.
“Mommy? Did you fall asleep with the window open again? You got cold! Here, let me tuck you in and kiss you.” Doing just these things, the sweet darling cuddled up next to her loved one.
“Mommy? Why aren’t you waking up?” her expression changed into that of worry when she didn’t get an answer.
“Uuuurgh! I hate it when that happens! Better get her off!” The strange lady’s voice was heard again, prompting a pair of big strong hands to get a hold of the now orphan child.
“Hey, lemme go! MOMMY, A MEAN MAN HAS ME! WAKE UP, WAKE UP MOMMY! HELP ME! NO, NO...” Kelly struggled vainly, trying and failing to perceive what was going on.
“I’m sorry kid but your mommy won’t be waking up! I’ll have to take you to a place where they’ll take care of you! Like a hotel for children like you!” The man made his final statement while maintaining his grip strong.
“NOOO, NOO! I DON’T WANNA GO! I WANT MY MOMMY! I’LL WAKE HER UP, YOU’LL SEE! MOMMY, MOMMY, MOOMMYYYYYYYY! NOOOOOOOOOOO…”
/Flashback 2/
A now 4 and a half year old Kelly closed a book, her face lacking any sort of expression. The contents of the book had left her whole being hollow and empty. The book was a novel, meant for adults. It was about a child who was just like her. In it she found quite the descriptive information about what an orphan was, why children became such, what happened to most of them. And it also had an explanation of something she had been denying and yet questioning for a long time.
“*sob, sob* I shouldn’t have entered the adult section of the library without permission!” The crushed girl buried her face into the cover of the book, secretions and other fluids being absorbed by it.
“I hate death.” She choked out, her face contorting into various grimaces.
/back to the present/
Kelly found herself in a déjà vu with her last memory, with the only difference of her clinging to her current pony guardian, and hiding her inconsolable tears.
“T-Twilight! I-I don’t wanna do this anymore! I wanna go!”
“The interview is over!” was the only thing Twilight said, before promptly escorting the child out of the room.
“Miss Sparkle… Miss Sombermayer… Miss Sparkle any comment about that reaction… why did she cry… Miss Sparkle…” The journalists kept on prattling about, flashing the duo, as the mass of press ponies were held back by the Royal guards.
***
After the twosome went out of reach, the magical mare immediately and discretely teleported both her and the human out of the corridors, rematerializing in the guest room meant for her and the other Elements of Harmony.
“Kelly, what… what happened? What’s wrong?” She asked the child, coming close and nuzzling her tenderly.
And so Kelly related the hardest moments of her past to her most beloved guardian. As she spoke through her laments, tears and mucus kept coming from her eyes and nose, her words muffled from all the sobbing, whimpering, hiccuping, sniffing as her head rested over Twilight’s shoulder.
“Oh, you poor misfortunate dear! It must’ve been very hard, spending each day in that horrible place.” The compassionate unicorn cradled the little human child, inserting soothing shushes and hums in between her sentences.
"Shhhh-shh-shh-shhhh! It's okay! I think I understand you a little bit better now. But you mustn't let that keep you down. I want you to know that I love you, and all of my friends do too. We'll never leave you and will make sure you never feel lonely again." The lavender mare kept on going, whispering sweet nothings in the human's ear as she stroked her head.
'Why didn't I see the signs? They were all there! It was obvious Kelly was suppressing the memories connected to the loss of her mother all along, what with how casually she spoke about it at first. And the way she pretended for it to be of no big deal! As if she was above it! No child can get over something of this magnitude! Thankfully now that the truth is out, her heart will be on its way to recovery.' The studious pony internally monologued to herself as she comforted her charge.
And it seems that her techniques seemed to be working, as the girl started calming down and her breathing slowed down to a calm pace. Once she noticed that fact, the library mare pulled out a silk handkerchief and wiped Kelly’s face clean, letting the girl blow her own nose.
“Do you want me to let you in on a little secret?” Twilight said cryptically, grinning playfully.
“Yeah! I love secrets!” The young maiden’s face brightened, forgetting all about her sadness.
“Well… if you wanna know… I’m preparing a very special surprise just for you!” The lavender mare half-whispered, teasing the human’s curiosity even further.
“Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!” Kelly’s eyes glimmered “What kind of surprise? I want to know!”
“Oohoohoooo! As Pinkie would say “If I told you then it wouldn’t be a surprise!”.” Twilight chimed in a singsong manner.
“Then when are you going to give me it?” The little dear’s enthusiasm deflated a little.
“Tonight, after the viewing of the Lunar Eclipse!” The spellweaving equine lifted the girl’s chin up and looked her in the eyes, biting her lower lip in motherly appreciation as she did so.
“Now, let's go and wash up, and then we can go and have dinner, okay?”
“Yeah, let’s!”
/at the Royal dining room/
Twilight and Kelly approached the great white doors of the Grand dining room filled with mirth. They had donned their finest Gala dresses and felt prettier than ever!
The lilac unicorn’s attire was ravishingly elegant with its separate top half made of satin, its color matching tonight’s starry sky, adorned with a lining of round jet black beads. Its back was made up of two segments: a purple transparent sheer underneath a silk bottom that matched her mane and a beautiful hem of a lighter hue. Top it off with a star-shaped accessory pinned on her midsection and a string tiara with the same symbol resting on her forehead, and TS could be considered one finely dressed mare.
The human girl on the other hand was like a tiny Venus! She was wearing the second dress Rarity had made her. Its color had been magically changed from aquamarine to that of sapphire blue specifically for this occasion due to its creator’s insistence. The gown was a bare back and had a single strap running up between the young child’s shoulder and neck. The ornaments consisted of a beautiful floral pattern with jewels incrusted that ran along the chest and lower back area, as well as in the vicinity of the pelvis. The whole thing flowed down to the knees, its creases starting from the midsection to the hem, making the child look like a delicate flower. Finally, in order to give the whole ensemble a finished look, Kelly’s hair was tied in a knot up-do with a blue lotus flower inserted.
As the two entered the grand dining room, the first thing that grabbed their attention was the excited conversation Pinkie Pie and Princess Luna were having on the left end of the lavishly set up overly-long table.
“I must admit that I am very much dazzled by the extra decorations you’ve brought lady Pinkamina! I do love the pink in addition to the traditional midnight blue.” The dark mare vocalized her approval as she scanned the walls and ceiling in awe.
“Oh, that’s just the hot strawberry-fudge icing princess! And please call me Pinkie! All my friends do, which includes you too of course! Pinkamina just doesn’t sound like me, I mean it’s quite a mouthful dontcha think, Hi Twilight, Hi Kelly, I mean wait till you see what I have in store for the Grand Finale…” The party pony kept on shooting words at rapid succession.
As she looked upon the scene surrounding her and the human, the lavender unicorn had to admit that her loveable pink friend had outdone herself this time. There were banners lined on the left and the right side of the hall, each of them bearing an orange full moon with dark blue star-spangled background on the top half and a magenta one on the lower half. The torches used to shed some light in the hall had bows of various colors tied onto them and oddly enough there were balloons halfway up the ceiling with candles magicked inside each of the rubbery orbs. In the far center one could clearly see an object specifically put to draw in all of the attention: a big expertly crafted paper mache moon with one replica of princess Luna standing on top of it, striking a dignified pose. And as to the table itself, it was set for quite the fancy feast.
Dishes upon dishes were stacked in neat rows, each of them bearing beautiful golden or silver tracery and if you looked hard enough at your plate you could recognize some sort of figure woven from these threads. Intricate candle holders were placed every sixteen feet, their soft radiance being reflected in the shiny silverware. Add to that some very fragrant roses put in artistically shaped vases and a snow-white silken tablecloth and everything seemed far too magical to be real. Also Spike had obviously arrived, well rested and hungry which was attested for from the way he kept grabbing treats from the platters the waiter ponies were carrying around.
“Something smells pretty!” Kelly sighed in delight, taking in the sophistication around her.
So immersed was Twilight in studying the details of the room that she completely tuned out everything else until she felt a tug on the saddle element of her dress and the little child’s lovely voice:
“Twilight, princess Celestia is standing right next to us, I think she wants something!” the kid informed her guardian, making the mare jump startled.
“Yaah! Oh, uh hi princess! I’m very glad to see you!” The bookish equine formed an awkward smile as she worked to recompose herself.
“*giggle* You seem quite high-strung today Twilight. Would you like some jasmine tea?” The alabaster alicorn provided a kettle made of fine china, steam coming out of its nozzle.
“Uuuuh, sure princess…” The intelligent mare took a deep breath and released all of her pent up tension.
“You can have some too Kelly.” Celestia took out two cups and poured some of the hot beverage to both her guests.
“Thank you, your princessyness *chortle*” Kelly gave an overly big nod, made a sign with fingers over one of her eyes to resemble a monocle, clamped her cup between her other hand’s thumb and index, and pointed her pinky up, doing so in an overly corny and theatric way.
This caused several laughs to erupt, the most thunderous one being RD’s who had decided to listen in on the trio.
“Hahahahahahahah! Priceless, priceless! How do you do it Kelly?” The mistress of awesome fought to contain her amusement.
“Heeheehaahaahaaaah! What are we laughing about girls?” Pinkie joined in, attracted by her friends’ joy.
“I say Pinkie old girl, is that youuuu?” The young maiden continued her onslaught, adopting an over-the-top English accent.
“Blimey, Kelly my dear! I say is that a Trotting’um accent you’re sportin’?” The sugary prankster grinned slyly, copying this new style of speaking to a tee.
“Time to be sophisticated and whatnot?” The human went on, resulting in a string of British stereotypical insanity.
“Indubitably!”
“Jolly good show!”
“Cheerio!”
“I could use a spot of tea!”
“Here you go luv!”
“Pip pip!”
“Poppy cock!”
“Higgledy piggledy!”
“I say!”
“I gotta get me bum outta the doldrums!”
“Quite, quite!”
“Smashing!”
“Tally-ho!”
“Pish-posh!”
And as the princesses, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Twilight, Fluttershy, Spike, the servants and even some of the guards were doubling over at the hilarity of it all, a very flushed Rarity spoke out from under her embarrassment.
“I say, do I really talk like that?” The pristine seamstress stuttered.
That one line was a finisher as most of the Elements of Harmony, and one baby dragon toppled over and rolled on the floor, trying desperately to stop the guffaws and save the fate of their aching stomachs.
“Heheheheh… Eeeheeeh… *deep breath* I have to admit that I have never laughed like that throughout all of these millennia! This will be more than enough entertainment to get me through the formal dinner with the ambassadors!” Princess Luna commented after regaining control over her senses.
“Ambassadors?” Twilight twisted her neck in Celestia’s direction, a confused look forming on her face.
“Yes, I’ve been meaning to speak with you about that Twilight.” The ruler of the sun adopted a more formal and serious tone.
“Please walk with me Twilight!” she motioned towards one of the far edges of the hall, in the direction of the balcony.
As teacher and student trotted along the spotless marble tiles, the unicorn couldn’t shake the feeling that this had something to do about the changes in the diner plans. Call it a hunch if you will!
“I was hoping to tell you this earlier but the circumstances didn’t allow it. You see every three years we hold two meetings between all of the world’s nations! The International Meeting of World Economy is held for the exact purpose it’s named after: to discuss economic matters and negotiate peaceful trade. The other is the World summit which is about more pressing matters such as World peace, boiling military conflicts and any other common threats that might be endangering that peace! The aforementioned is scheduled for next Saturday here in Canterlot and some of the ambassadors have already arrived and settled in.” Celestia briefed her lavender protégé as they came to a standstill at the balcony.
“But what does this have to do with anything… besides them coming to dinner as I heard princess Luna say.” The unicorn mare furrowed her brows in further confusion.
“Well they said they wanted to honor and show their respect to our national holiday by attending dinner with us tonight! However I have my speculations that some of them actually came this early for something else.” The pristine alicorn took a furtive glance back at the hall.
“And what might that be?” Twilight inquired.
“Some of my sister’s sentries reported that they saw some Griffin and Minotaur spies sneaking around Ponyville at night. I dare speculate that it might have something to do with our alien friend over there.” The ruler of the day motioned with her eyes towards the human in question.
“W-what do they want with Kelly?” The studious pony’s ears flattened, stuttering in her words.
“Oh, the Griffins and Minotaurs are just up to their old tricks again… to see if Equestria has a new shiny military asset! I think they’re just concerned about aliens dropping out of the sky is all… which is quite funny when you think about it… but it’s nothing to worry about my dear Twilight. They’re just curious about our little guest! Once they satisfy their curiosity and find nothing in interest regarding her everything will be back to normal. “The princess giggled at how overly seriously the other nations were taking the whole ordeal.
“Whew! You’re right princess. This is nothing to get flustered over.” Twilight let out a sigh of relief.
Celestia smiled at the sight of her student getting emotional about the human child and lowered her head to the unicorn’s level:
“So, how are things going with Kelly? Have you made any decisions about her lately?” The alicorn ruler teased her most faithful subject.
“Yeah… I’m planning to tell her tonight…” The studious student of magic looked up at the stars, her heart aflutter with anxiety.
“Tell her what my faithful student?” The tall equine pressed on. She knew what Twilight was planning. From the night of that party she could tell it was inevitable! But she wanted to hear her say it nevertheless.
***
“Oh, my Kelly! You’re really pretty with that dress and you mane done up like that!” Fluttershy smiled meekly as she looked the girl over from head to heel.
“Thanks! Rarity made the dress and Twilight did my face and hair.” Kelly brought her two hands together holding them together in front of her legs. Truth be told she was feeling just a bit giddy.
“I’m sure you’ll make a good impression on the ambassadors!” Princess Luna passed by, giving her best regards.
“Oh, my! You told us about these foreign visitors princess but just who are they?” The meek Pegasus flattened her ears, her instinctual fear of having to act and make a good impression in front of VIPs instantly kicking in.
“Ambassadors? I haven’t read about what those are yet but they won’t judge me when they come will they? I hope I won’t make them feel uncomfortable! Oh, dear, I have to side with Fluttershy on this one! It’s no fun being the center of attention! I don’t like formal diners… I… maybe I should go and hide in my room!” Kelly’s nerves began getting the better of her, her stress rising up and squeezing her little heart, which felt like icy cold barb wire was entwined around it.
Just as the little human couldn’t take anymore, she started in the opposite direction she was facing, too afraid to face what lay ahead. Luckily before she made even three feet of distance, the scared little girl was seized by the shy but determined mare who draped her forehooves from behind around the human’s little frame and shushed and hummed soothing words into her ears:
“Shhh, shhh, shhh! It’s okay little Kelly. Don’t be afraid! I know how you feel. I feel the same way right now. But you shouldn’t let fear tell you you can’t do the thing you’re afraid of. Running isn’t the solution! You should face what you’re scared of with your head held up high, believing you can overcome it! Now don’t fret! We’ll all be here to help you along the way. I promise!” The gentle caretaking mare caressed the child’s noggin affectionately until she felt the kid’s stress fade and give way to calmness.
“Thank you Fluttershy! I needed that.” Kelly sighed deeply in relief before she heard a whooshing sound zip by them.
“Hey Flutters! You totally gotta try this tiny sandwich thing! This fancy stuff is absolutely awesome!” Rainbow Dash hovered by, heavily snacking on six pieces of the mentioned hoof (finger) food.
“Yeah Fluttershy! These munchie-wunchies are absolutely the best! Why they taste almost as sweet as, as, as… oh, oh like what, like what? ... Oh, like vanilla-caramel cake but more spicy-like, and roasted instead of baked!” Pinkie Pie bounced along, having brought double the quantity Rainbow had, smacking her lips with gusto.
“Cease and desist! Hold on you terrible mares! Those are for the respectable Griffin guest!” A middle-aged chef stallion with a short and very shaggy blonde mane ran after them, ranting and cussing.
“Yeah, yeah! We know you’re the esteemed chef Horton Hamzey but there is like over a hundred of those things on the plate over there! You don’t expect the griffin ambassador to eat all of them do you?” RD rolled her eyes in annoyance, preferring to stay airborne.
“But you don’t understand! Those hors d’oeuvres you’re eating… they’re made from freshly roasted mice that the griffin delegates brought and requested me to cook! I still can’t get rid the ghastly smell that’s in my kitchen! They reek so terribly and here you are gorging on them like a bunch of carnivores!” Hamzey gave a detailed exposition on the exact reason as to why this heinous act bothered him so.
This resulted at all of the ponies in hearing range to drop what they’re doing and just stare at the two mares that had stopped in mid bite and stared at the appetizers they were holding.
In the next moment the former Junior Speedster’s cheeks bulged, her face grew green and she dashed on over to a pot of acacias where she barfed everything she had managed to scarf down so far plus the drinks.
The pink demon of parties however simply stared at the food in her possession with a seemingly incredulous look before smiling and continuing to chew:
“Mmmm, proteiny! I never knew meat could be so yummy! No wonder humans like it! Hey Kelly would you like one?” The crazy earth pony offered one of the said aperitifs to the tiny maiden.
“N-no thanks Pinkie!” Kelly waved her hand absentmindedly, her concept of what’s normal quite blown “Most humans prefer other meat to mouse burgers.”
“Well that was unexpected!” Luna suppressed a chortle. As a princess she had had thousands of years of experience as head of negotiations and this occasion was rather amusing to her.
“Ahem… AAA-HEEEEM!” A male unicorn in a fancy suit and a monocle gathered the attention of everypony as they drew their gazes upon him and the great doors which opened “Announcing the arrival of the most venerable guests of the night! Introducing… Commodore Galvin Dubois, head of the Royal air fleet of the Griffin Kingdom and its current ambassador!” he motioned as an impressive figure stepped forth.
It belonged to a male griffon, one who carried himself with utmost grace and courtesy, with piercing dark blue eyes that generated respect for all beings great or small. He wore a royal naval uniform as expected of his rank, one of its elements being a frock coat which was even darker blue, almost black, with golden laced buttons and epaulets with tassels. The coat split in two like a typical frock, its two segments going right between his tail which ended with a bushy end. A snow white shirt lay underneath with a frilly collar and a fancy dress sword hung from his hip which gave the delegate a look of sophistication. As to his appearance, he was a fairly toned individual with dark brown plumage, with the exception of his head, neck and chest area which were hazel. The lead gray beak and claws and the formation of feathers on his head which looked like a pair of horns gave off a hint of mystery about this plumed creature.
“Good evening princess Celestia, princess Luna! It’s an honor to be with you on this fine occasion! I hope we will have a wonderful celebration this evening.” The griffon walked over, bowed and kissed both princesses’ hooves respectfully.
“Next up is war chief Fair Trial, one of the top generals of the armies of the Minotaur alliance and also its Minister of Economy!” The announcer carried on with introductions as the next guest entered the scene.
He was a massive minotaur, standing seven feet tall, with an impressive physique that rivaled that of another certain Minotaur we all know. His legs however were quite exceptional! Even though they were those of a goat just like any individual of his species, they were much bulkier and well trained to match the rest of his body proportionately. His horns were pointing forward in an aggressive manner and his hairstyle was longer than what was traditional in his homeland, tied in a braid, his head covered by a steel skullcap, giving off a distinct metallic sheen. His attire consisted of a forest green woolen kirtle embroidered with silver lining, a leather belt wrapped around it and a blue linen undershirt hidden underneath. The pair of bright red long cloth trousers tied with string at the ankles draped down on his legs and were very loose-fitting.
The towering biped clip-clopped his way to Equestria rulers, removed his helm and politely bowed to them before excusing himself to the table where he promptly sat.
“And last but not least is Zebrakia’s prime minister Afiya!” The spokespony concluded taking some steps back to make way for the final arrival of the evening.
A zebra mare stepped forth, the expression on her face soft and humble. Her fur pattern was much like Zecora’s, her muzzle pitch black, stripes all over her body, slightly coiled like vines. She wore a simple sand colored mantle which she hooved to a porter as she passed him by, revealing the only clothing left on her body to be a light vest of a matching color, lined with bark brown edges. The ambassador’s mane was straight, long, her sharp bangs almost covering her smart violet eyes; there was also a dyed lock of green going down her entire coiffure, a piece of golden jewelry at its end used to keep it from spilling all over her back much like Applejack’s hair tie. Twilight took notice of her cutie mark which looked like a very exotic type of knot, bundled up to create some semblance of a square.
Unlike the other guests however, when the zebra approached Celestia they embraced like a couple of old friends, which they were actually.
“I’m glad to see you again my old friend! It’s been too long since we last met.” Afiya smiled mildly, breaking the hug and then turning her attention to the younger of the royal pony sisters “And Princess Luna, I am honored you are having me for dinner. I’ve never thought I’d live the day to witness this ancient and mystical event with you alongside us. But here we are! I wish you much love and happiness from this day on.”
“Thank you prime minister Afiya!” Luna nodded appreciatively, hiding her overflowing joy on the inside, remaining as stoic and majestic as her sister.
Having have finished with all the formalities, the guests sat down to dine, that being the cue for Octavia and her band to begin playing their classical pieces, providing a pleasant to the ear background.
While the ambassadors and princesses engaged in small talk, one could see Rainbow Dash who was still a little green under the gills, looking at her green salad with pieces of radish and blue cheese with a nauseous look.
“Uuuuuuh… oooooh, boy…… Urp…….. *groan*……. Urrrrrrrgh……..” the cyan Pegasus moaned bitterly, her head wobbling back and forth.
“Rainbow Dash! What’s with these abominable noises you are making! So unlady like! It’s just plain uncouth if you ask me!” Rarity scrunched up her snout in indignation, looking at the speedster as if she were licking the table.
“Urp! Sorry Rares…. for feeling sick to my stomach.” The Wonderbolt in training replied weakly, looking at her friend with tired eyes before adding “I should’ve never eaten those mouse sandwiches!”
“Oh, don’t worry Rainbow Dash! I know how you’re feeling. I ate a whole bundle of ice cream today remember? Don’t worry, it’ll pa…” Spike chimed in but before he could finish his eyes widened as Rainbow’s face literally dove into the dish, splattering some sunflower oil and vinegar over the table cloth.
“What happened to Rainbow Dash?” Kelly asked, incapable of comprehending what just happened.
What she could hear though was AJ’s muffled cackling.
“Huhuhuhuuuuh… Ah wish I had a camera to film this!” The farm mare could not contain her amusement as she laid witness to the hilarity that was the green salad with a side of rainbow pegasus.
“Oh, oh! Let me, let me!” Pinkie took out an old fashioned camera snapper before quickly taking a snapshot.
“You girls! This is no laughing matter! We have to get Rainbow Dash out of here before the ambassador or princesses notice what happened!” Twilight berated her friends, sighing in relief that Rainbow was sitting at the opposite end of the table and neither the mentioned guests of honor nor her rulers had seen a thing yet “Fluttershy please!”
“Oh, okay! It’s fine! I’ll do it!” The timid butter coated mare stood up and helped her old flight school pal up, making her way for the exit.
As she did that a couple of servants quickly came to her aid in order to cover up the mess which they feared one of them would be blamed for.
“And as I was saying, I am very pleased with how the friendly relationships between our countries have been going so far. I dare say that Equestria in particular is a prime example of that! This recent turn of events with the alien is quite astonishing. My king could not believe how an alien suddenly appeared here in your country but he is going to be even more amazed when upon my return I tell him how your majesty, your student and her friends easily managed to befriend it.” The griffin commodore spoke with admiration, earning the approval of both princesses who smiled at his flattering words.
“I hope you’ll pardon me if I’ll sound rude when I say it but I have to admit that I am quite curious about who this creature really is and where it came from.”
“It’s no trouble at all! You know commodore Dubois, you could ask her yourself right now if you want to and if it’s okay with her and my student.” Celestia nodded in approval, turning her face towards the lavender mare in question.
“Twilight, the commodore is interested to know more about Kelly. Is it okay with you two if he asks her a few questions. I’m sure the other ambassadors are interested to hear her tell us about herself too.”
“Uuuum, I guess that’s okay as long as Kelly is willing. Let me just consult myself with her!” Twilight smiled sheepishly before nudging the human and holding a short conversation with her before turning to address Dubois “She’d love to!”
“Quite! Don’t mind if I do.” The ambassador nodded, setting his gaze upon the small bipedal being.
“Why hello there little one! I don’t think we’ve officially met, I’m Commodore Galvin Dubois but you can just call me Galvin.”
“Oh, hello there mister Galvin! I’m Kelly Sombermyer but calling me Kelly is okay with me.” Kelly responded, swallowing her nerves by taking a deep breath beforehand.
“Right! I have to admit, me and my foreign ambassador colleagues here share quite the interest in you. Would it trouble you to tell us a bit about yourself? Species, age, place of origin maybe?” The griffon went on, a golden twinkle sparkling in his eye.
“I’m an orphaned human girl, six years old, and as you can assume there aren’t any humans on this world. I don’t know how I came here but it seems that I arrived on a world that is not my own. My home world is named Earth and I’m not sure how far away I am from there.” The child did her best to give the proper exposition to her dilemma.
“Fascinating! And what is your world and other humans like? Is it a nice place to live? Tell me about human society.”
“Well, from what I’ve recently read in a library in the town of Ponyville where I ended up after disappearing from the orphanage where I used to live at, human society is very similar to the pony one. One of the few differences I can think of is that we humans are so technologically advanced now, that mass producing and building things, gathering and sharing information happens really fast thanks to our machines… Oh, and there are a lot of problems all over my world since it’s inhabited by billions of people and there are some greedy and manipulative humans among us. I guess as far as it goes, it all depends on where and how a human grows up to determine what he or she is like.”
“I see. I’m guessing you’re quite a thirsty one for knowledge since you already know so much. You probably used to keep in touch with the news on current events in your world, is that correct?” Dubois fired his next queries, too enraptured in his curiosity to notice the minotaur chief glower at him and tap his fist on the table, startling one of the waitress mares who was so spooked by this sudden outburst that she barely kept the wine bottle she was carrying from tipping over.
“Hey Dubois, no fair! You keep hogging all the questions for yourself! Let others have their turn will you?” Fair Trial frowned, feeling insulted.
“Oh, excuse me chieftain! I didn’t mean to be neglectful of you and Prime Minister Afiya. Please, do speak.” The griffin diplomat flashed a gentlemanly grin, before taking a bite from one of his mouse hors d’oeuvres.
“Yes, in fact I will!” The bulky bovine man huffed with pride and then proceeded with his most pressing questions of the night “What is the human military like? Can you and your fellow humans defend yourself if left without any weapons?”
These particular questions left little Kelly speechless for a while. She was not only shocked but also stumped at what to answer. The child wasn’t that knowledgeable of martial arts or war, other than the fact that human men liked to wage wars for conquest and power. She had once tried to read “The Killer Angels” by Michael Shaara that was about the battle of Gettysburg during the American Civil war, but Kelly couldn’t bare reading past the first lines, depicting battle scenes. It was all too much!
“We do have war where we come from. But I don’t know much about it, or fighting. I only know that it’s horrible and I hate it along with violence!” The girl looked down, her bright mood faltering, causing Twilight to drape a hoof over her and give the minotaur ambassador a very fierce look.
“Hmph! And here I thought…” Fair Trial began before he was interrupted by Calvin.
“I’m sorry to interrupt chief Fair Trial, I really am, but do you really think that such a meek and delicate little creature that is also a six year old blind girl would know about such uncouth matters let alone practice them herself?” The griffin smirked amusedly, stifling a laugh coming up his beak, followed by the hushed giggles from everybody else.
“Why it’s as if you want this fair little maiden to hike up her dress and have a practice bout with you right this instant on top of the table no less!”
“I have to agree with Commodore Dubois on this one. Please refrain for any further questions such as these. This is a holiday and we are at the table.” Luna intervened after taking a breath to calm down at the ridiculousness of it all.
“Rassen Frassen knowitall griffon… why I oughta…” The Minotaur muttered to himself, embarrassed at his own faux pas.
“I for once will abstain from questioning! I’d rather enjoy a more casual talk with lady Kelly after dinner.” Afiya finally pitched in, adding her own thoughts on the matter.
And so conversations about everything else resumed. After the official dinner had ended and everypony were full, they split up into small groups, mingling amongst each other. On one side you had Twilight, Rarity, Kelly, Afiya and Dubois talking about the human girl’s integration into pony society, human/pony culture relations, and International fashion and means of intertwining styles in order to create hybrid clothing (courtesy of our loveable fashion diva of course). The little alien girl had to admit that she liked both of the ambassadors seeming as how the zebra mare was so even-tempered and open-minded and the commodore was very courteous and nice.
Meanwhile Rainbow Dash had returned and she was feeling better than ever, back to her old cocky self. In fact the anti-nausea pills she had taken had worked so well that she decided to take an evening flight, going out the balcony and taking off.
Not far off were the princesses who were listening with content as Spike told them the fun times he had spent with Kelly during her stay in Ponyville so far.
As to what Fluttershy and Pinkie were doing at the time, the former was seriously trying to dissuade the latter from trying some fish recipes once they got home.
“But Fluttershy, it’s not like I’m going on a carnivore diet. I’m just thinking of cooking some grilled fishies for Kelly.” The party mare insisted.
“No, Pinkie, no! You mustn’t! It would be too cruel to the fish!” The butter-coated Pegasus protested.
“Why not? I’ve seen you feed otters with fish all the time, what’s the dif?”
As everypony talked and had a good time, Fair Trial on the other hand wasn’t so happy. He sat in a corner of the large table and took swigs from his glass of quality malt scotch. He knew it was quite ridiculous but he felt his pride hurt after that little mishap at dinner. Perhaps he was quite foolish to have asked his questions so blatantly that it made the wrong impression. Either way he was not in the mood for anything right now.
“Howdy there, chief Fair Trial! What’s with the long face?” Applejack approached him, wearing a friendly grin.
“I’m sorry miss… Applejack was it, but I sat down here to get some alone time. In others words I’d rather not talk about it.” The Minotaur turned his head away, his frown deepening on his furrowed face.
“Aaaaaw, don’t be like that chief! Everypony has moments they are not proud of and that’s nuthin to be ashamed about. Plus, haven’t ya heard of the Equestrian phrase “laughing at yourself”.” The southern gal put a compassionate hoof on the bipedal giant’s shoulder.
“Thank you miss Applejack!” The horned chief stood up, his confidence renewed “This is the very thing I like about Equestria! There’s always someone to lend you a helping hand, er hoof when you’re in need. We Minotaurs on the other hand don’t do much of that due to our code of pride.”
***
It wasn’t long before the hour of the eclipse was at hoof, and every sentient creature big and small left their homes to gather around on meadows, clouds and terraces to watch this momentous event. Canterlot’s upper levels darkened so that the city lights wouldn’t interfere with the wonders the sky was about to grace them in due time. Every porthole on every spire of the city had ponies poking their head out of them, some having brought telescopes to make the occasion more special. The only source of light was that of the street lights in Canterlot gardens, where a small crowd had gathered. One could see many families having put together picnics with lots of food and sheets to lie upon. You could literally feel the festive atmosphere what with the constant buzzing of countless ponies’ voices, chatting about this and that; the smells of moon flowers and night blooming water lilies; the feeling of elation and excitement hanging in the air.
“Ahem, testing, testing! Is this thing on?” The announcer unicorn, the same that announced the arrival of the ambassadors tapped one of the magical microphones before getting on with his work with his most theatrical and ringing tone “Good evening fillies and gentlecolts! Tonight we have gathered for a wondrous occasion! For this date marks one of the rarest events ever to be seen in the Equestrian sky: A total Lunar Eclipse! It happens once every seven years and it is known for the visible effects on the moon’s color spectrum which changes from yellow to orange to blood red. Also this particular event is the one that powers up the moon crystal, the dark blue mass situated in Canterlot gardens, and it also gives unicorns a temporary magic boost. However, this eclipse is even more special than the ones before it, for tonight is the first eclipse which is to be led by none other than our recently returned princess of the night, her majesty princess Luna!”
As the speaker turned towards his princess, expecting her to take over for her speech, he was left utterly indignant as he gazed upon his night princess crouching on the floor, playing around and cooing at a small brown bat that our favorite animal caretaker had given her as a present little while before everypony went out on the balcony.
“Ahem, your majesty!” The stallion puckered his lips in aggravation, his voice stirring Luna out of her cuteness induced trans.
Her face blushed in a deep crimson hue and she quickly recomposed herself quickly stood back up, ready to give her speech.
“Dear citizens of Canterlot! I am very glad to see you all gathered here on this most memorable of nights! It means a lot to me to see so many young and old faces here tonight! I feel quite happy that my work has been appreciated throughout all these years and I’m also filled with great joy to be here again after a thousand years and attend my own holiday! Now without further ado, let us start with a spectacular light show to show you just how great this night shall be!” The night mare proclaimed the last bit with the royal Canterlot voice, earning a massive round of applause as the first wave of fireworks deployed coloring the sky in countless hues and filling it with crackling and booming sounds.
The explosives soared like great birds and erupted like flowers and multicolored stars. Flickering in the heavens above, they made everypony ooo and aah in marvel at their amazing even if brief beauty.
“What’s happening now Twilight? Is it fireworks? I think I hear fireworks.” Kelly asked her nose scrunching up as she wondered if her hunch was correct.
“Yes Kelly! A firework show is set to go on until the moon gets into the position of the eclipse.” Twilight rubbed the kid between the shoulder blades as an act of comfort.
‘I don’t get what the big deal is! I’ve always sat with the other orphans every 4th of July at the open windows where everybody else watched this supposed show but other than the loud nasty bangs I can’t gather much of as to why they are called “beautiful”. Must be a thing for the eye I guess.’ The orphan scrunched up her nose again but this time out of her vexation at the thought of something she couldn’t understand.
The act itself made the studious unicorn bite her lip in endearment.
‘Kelly is so cute when she does that!’ she thought as she hugged the human with one hoof and brought her closer to her pony self.
As the finale of the firework show was coming to a conclusion, the last of the fiery volleys ceased before one large missile propelled itself upwards and flared up revealing itself in the form of princess Luna rearing up on the inside of a crescent moon with numerous sparks around. That last one threw the crowd into an ecstasy of wild cheers and hoof stomping. Even the real mistress of the night was surprised as she laughed boisterously in joy.
“Wooooah! That was awesome!” Rainbow’s jaw threatened to hit the floor at the sight of that display.
“Yep! All me! No need to thank me!” Pinkie rubbed her chest not so modestly with a self-satisfied grin.
“Why Pinkie Pie, was this the thing you’ve been hiding in your wagon?” Rarity tossed an inquiring look at her amiable pink friend.
“Yepperoonie! It wasn’t easy to get it so don’t ask me how. Let’s just say know a pony.” The party mare whispered that last part into the seamstress’ ear, even though it wasn’t necessary since it was a loud whisper that everypony could hear.
And at long last, just as the light show ended, the moon settled into its designated position. Everything went silent as all living things looked upon the shining orb above. Its colors little by little changed from its ghostly white to yellow, to orange, to scarlet, and finally to crimson.
The rays of the moon colored everything in their path in all of the aforementioned colors, their effect bringing about a special change in the crystal mass, situated in the center of the palace garden. It began to glow in a dark blue hue, which made some of the ponies in the city feel quite odd. The unicorns of Canterlot all felt a tingle run down their horns and spines as a fresh flow of magic flowed through their veins. Some of the family fathers and mothers even put up small shows of entertainment for their foals, so they could put their newly found powers to some use.
As it came to princess Luna, the lunar alicorn sighed deeply, relishing the feeling of the moon which was now in its most powerful state and was now adding to the princess’ great magical reserves. It was in that moment that she felt truly alive, feeling herself growing stronger as the minutes passed.
Celestia grinned as she saw her little sister’s jubilant smile. She hadn’t seen her that happy in a millennium, and was glad that everything came out so perfectly for tonight.
“Lady Kelly, tell me! How are you enjoying my holiday? Are you pleased?” Luna’s attention suddenly refocused on her little guest of honor, anxious to hear the opinion of an alien from a completely different world.
“Oh yes, princess Luna! I very much like it! The smells, the sounds of happiness, that mystical feeling I’m getting right now ever since things got quiet! Everything is perfect!” Kelly spoke with reverence, admiring every little aspect of this occasion “In fact I think I read somewhere that we too have Lunar and Solar eclipses. Only they’re more frequent because some of them aren’t complete and they aren’t magical. They happen by coincidence.”
“I am very happy to hear that!” The blue diarch nodded in approval.
Feeling pleased with the human’s answer, she chose to continue looking upon her precious moon. However… the conversation wasn’t over!
“I really enjoyed everything so far. I really did. But…” The little girl stopped in mid-sentence, her expression becoming forlorn, which made Twilight feel uneasy once she saw.
“But…” the princess of the moon, prompted for the outlandish child to continue.
Kelly knew that right now, everypony on the balcony was staring at her and expecting her to go on. A very uncomfortable feeling made its way inside the young maiden’s heart; one of shame and unworthiness. She felt like she didn’t deserve to be here and enjoy the festivities, after she was so rude as to depreciate everypony’s effort to make her experience the best night she’s ever had.
“Please, lady Kelly! Go on! I can tell you want to say something, but you feel ashamed. Please, there’s nothing to fear. You can tell all of us anything, we won’t be mad at you. We promise!” Luna kept on pushing, reaching out to her sister, Spike and the Elements of Harmony who all voiced their support.
Taking a few deep breaths, the human finally sighed in defeat and confessed:
“Again, I really loved everything that’s happened to me today! I’m just so happy to call this place my home! You’ve all been so very kind to me! And I really enjoyed tonight’s holiday! However… I really wish I could but… since I couldn’t see the fireworks and can’t see the moon and the stars, I think that I’m really missing out on the best things of the holiday. I’m just a little sad that I can’t enjoy it like you can.” Kelly lowered her head and pouted guiltily.
“Ooooooooooh!” Everypony daawed compassionately at the sad display.
“It’s okay Kelly! Don’t be sad! We’re all here for you and there’s no need for you to feel guilty about it.” Spike came up to the blind orphan and hugged her feet. Kelly in turn lowered herself and returned the dragon’s hug, finding comfort in his soft embrace.
At this display, princess Luna started to feel a little guilty herself. Everything was ideal, everypony were happy, and there she was asking that awkward question without even considering the child’s eyesight problem. But then, something clicked in her mind!
‘Maybe I could… Noooo! No, no, no, I couldn’t! It would be so selfish of me! But then again… I don’t want to do it for me, I want to do it for lady Kelly! When I think about it, that old magic rock has been sitting there for millennia and we never even tried to use it even once! I doubt anypony would ever even use it, so why not now!’ the dark blue alicorn thought things over before taking her final decision and walking over to the human and her draconic companion.
“You know lady Kelly, there might be a solution to your dilemma.” The night princess hinted, her voice growing quiet and mysterious.
“H-huh?” The small child blinked in confusion.
“Kelly, how would you like to be able to see through your eyes.” Luna made her proposal as if it was the simplest thing in the world.
As these words left her mouth, all who heard her gasped rather noisily. Every pair of eyes were now upon the dark alicorn, their pupils having have shrank into pinpricks.
To be continued… Haters gonna hate!
Credit for Twilight's dress goes to selinmarsou from deviantart.com
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3028423 The tip of their hooves are sensitive!
cdn.derpiboo.ru/media/BAhbBlsHOgZmSSIsMjAxMi8xMi8wMS8xOV8yNV8yNF8yOTlfMTY5MzU2X19VTk9QVF9fBjoGRVQ/169356__safe_rarity_animated_spoiler-s03e05_magic-duel.gif
And they do have blind ponies in Equestria. It's only logical.
I wonder
pbs.twimg.com/media/BGZhNm3CMAAyatw.jpg:large
‘Kelly is so cute when she does that!’
One of the links is broken, I think. It links us to the zebra cutie mark, yet you talk about Kelly scrunching her nose. Might want to fix that.
Besides that, love the new chapter. Well done!
3028465 Give that man a prize!
th08.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/f/2012/064/9/c/pinkie_pie_party_wallpaper_by_aloopyduck-d4rv0gf.jpg
0_0 a cure for blindness (or equivalent method of sight) - ALERT THE MEDIA
we need to get the news out, the way to cure blindness is magical ponies and a rock
3028637 if you see a comment that's more than 20 weeks old, fuck off and dont reply to it
it annoys the fuck outta me
I just wish to say that this has been worth the wait. While I hope that you get the strength and motivation to write this on a more regular basis.
Well anyway. Thank you for managing to once again bring tears to my eyes.
Hmm.... magical rocks cure blindness....
It must be Tom. It can only be Tom.
She doesn't have any vision, she's blind
3028465 Oh goodness, that made me laugh so hard. Especially when I put that to the pony!
3029421
That is true...but it could also have made her see darker shades of black.
3029702 blindness means her retinas don't work. Retinas are what sense light and such, making an image of sorts. I could go into detail but I cany be bothered. So anyway sinse she cannot see/ sense light,mshe would be unable to see different shades of black
3028435 Maybe it's just that either Rarity is a marshmallow, uses too much hoof-lotion or the extensive hooficure at the spa is finally working it's magic? !trollface!
I saw no “Feel like a sir” moment,but I did find a “Feel like a madame”.
BTW.... I sent you a PM on some things regarding the chapter. #2. is easily salvageable without to much editing.
Well... It's got some cute moments, now and again. For the most part, however, it's total moe pandering dribble. There seems to be no real plot aside from "I'm a blind orphan, feel bad for me", and all the scenes I've read seem to be ripped straight out of a badly written chick flick. A character meets the blind girl, feels bad about reacting badly to her, maybe cries at the revelation that she's an orphan. Rinse and repeat. Most characters you did well, but some feel pretty out of character, Rainbow's lines in particular.feel ooc. Not to mention the girl being a total Mary Sue. A veritable genius at 6 years old, violin prodigy, coming from a terrible background that would mess up any other kid, but not letting it get to her, with a penchant for giving people the feels. Sound vaguely familiar? It should. It's been done to death. Only weakness noted is the blindness, which only exists to exploited and increase said feel giving. Good luck with the story, I'm sure this appeals to someone. Not to me, unfortunately.
Another chapter of this awesome goodness. Why sir, thank you, thank you very much!
3038889 You're welcome!
3040865 I dunno. It just occurred naturally. But don't worry, I've read plenty of stories where Twilight Velvet is very nice. Plus if you wanna know, she'll turn around in a couple of more chapters where she reapears in my story.
If you still need proof readers i could do it, though i have little to no experience in it. And if you didn't like how i was doing with it you could always ask me to stop.
3045207 Well, Thule is already helping me find the problems within my chapters, so I'd have to say that I'd rather get me a new editor to fix the spelling and grammar mistakes. If you think you're up to it, write me a private message with your e-mail address in it, and I'll send you my e-mail and a copy of the chapter.
3047677
Blind people read with there fingers, it's called braille.
I thought I was your proof reader?
3124164 Did I forget to send you a message? Sorry, my bad! Oh and you were my editor! A pre-reader such as Thule notices mistakes with plotline and character behaviour! However I did give another guy a chance to edit this chapter. He only found and fixed one sentence.
But don't be disappointed! You could still go through editing the chapter yourself. Some stories have more than one editor!
PS: If you're willing to edit the chapter, then I suggest replying to this reply so I can send you a copy. Oh, and when you edit don't forget to change the font color (perhaps red) on every little thing you change. From a word, to a phrase, to a fully revised sentence!
Have a nice day Nersa!
3134265 Why not just the next chapter?
3134277 Kay then! When I come around to doing it, I'll notify you via PM!
Kelly equal=Snowdrop..........I'm going to hell...
3147242 Heh! Chillax! Everyone has their assosiations! However I think its the other way around!
Snowdrop = Kelly since Snowdrop's debut was in spring 2013, and Kelly's in summer 2012
3150026 Alright, my correction we're both going to Equestria......and being blind......yippee!
3150053
OH NOZ! THOUGHTRULER ARCHFIEND! :O
I really want that synchro :3
please more,
aw man I cant wait to see what happens next
finally caught up. awesome story, just one thing that botthers me: actually wright out the full names its ok to say AJ. or RD every once in a wile but calling twilight sparkle TS that's really just lazy
Kelly and Pinkie with British accents!?
Is Kelly going to meet Discord later on?
3512318 I dunno... if I get ideas for an interesting chapter... then maybe... coz so far all I can imagine is Discord's disappointed face, saying how boring she is... unless Kelly says something witty to change his mind...
3623551
That's looking at the darkest aspects of humanity. What, there's no good that comes out of humanity? I'm sorry, that's very tropish, and untrue. You're constantly looking at the evil, and perceiving humans as evil. Sorry, but the main character herself is human, and this story is so misanthropic that I highly doubt it'll get the attention it could get if the trope didn't exist here.
This character falls under the "Mary Sue" category.
Your defense has no rational thought behind it. Do humans have their flaws? Yes. What about ponies? HELL FUCKING YES PONIES HAVE FLAWS AS WELL!
Their reaction to Zecora?! Their reaction to the manticore other than Fluttershy's in season 1 episode 1&2?! Also, this is a kid's show, they're not going to show the darker aspects of society as whole, only the romanticized parts of it in a show like this.
Humans aren't all sunshine, but that's only a fraction of humanity, not all of it. Take off those blinders of yours, and start looking at humanity a little more realistic.
Ponies have the same reactions, and same exact outlook on things that are alien to them.
Also, if humans are as you say they are, I guess we wouldn't have made something like MLP FiM because humanity is evil. Humanity is too evil to make a show like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. We as humans, are too evil to feel love and compassion. We as humans are too evil to become bronies. We as humans are too evil to feel any kind of emotion.
I can keep going. You are implying all of these things I listed. Go ahead and keep filling your head with that bull crap.
3623738 Yeah, I know! I've had that pointed out before. I've been planning on removing almost every "humanity is a bitch" comment of Kelly's except the one where they ask her if she knows what war is coz that bit is necessary. The whole trope is kinda silly anyways.
Also not everypony is gonna be very trusting of Kelly. My rewrites and future chapters are gonna make sure of that.
And with the Mary Sue issue... Sorry, Can't help ya! Not my problem most six year old girls act like Mary Sues. TROLOLOL!
3625174
Sorry if you take offense to my comments, but it's kind of a thing I do. I am not as harsh as a lot of other people out there, far from it. I will say when a fic is shit. I'm not saying your fic is crap, I'm just pointing out the tropes, and pet peeves. Even the bigger no-noes that people tend to throw into their fics.
It irks me.
3625183 It's okay man! The other critics were way more angry than you. You just shared your concerns.
But seriously! One of the things I can't fix is the Mary Sueyish personality that Kelly has. It just goes with every typical 6 year old girl.
3625193
At least you understand.
3713532 Hahahahahaah! Yeah! LOL
Guess I have another story I have to keep an eye out for now... Don't really mind the Mary Sue vibe. Don't see why people complain about it considering they don't HAVE to read the story. Or even comment on it. If they hadn't pointed it out I wouldn't have even noticed the vibe at all. What can you do though. Someone's gotta be THAT guy.
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw3867_medium.jpg
When's the next chapter comming
I was really getting excited for the huge climax 
I'll watch but please do more chapters I'm loving this story
Damn right haters gonna hate...
IM HATEING
Is that supposed to be "our" rather than "your"? Also, shouldn't that be a question-mark?
Also, when's this gonna update? 28 weeks of hiatus right before the climax of the arc is quite harsh...
3988690 Just don't go overboard.
* Pumps Double Barrel shotgun* or else, right Sorin?
Sorin: Yeppers!
4165299 yeah, yeah, I know, it's weak.
Well, it was interesting to learn not all zebras in mlp rhyme when they speak. That I did not expect.
I am a little peeved that we're still waiting for twi to tell Kelly the big news.
As for what luna has in mind... No luna
no, I, sorry. Your heart's in the right place, but Kelly has lived her whole life, I do realize that's only 6 years, but still, blind and her body and mind have adapted to that.
While I do commend you for wanting to make her happy, in the long run, she would come to regret it. Her way of seeing the world, whether it be earth or equestria, is because of her lack of sight. To give her her sight would be to rob her of what makes her Kelly. I know this, because I was blind for a short time and after my eyesight returned, I lost a lot of the views I had of the world from when I was blind and there are times that saddens me
Kelly was born blind for a reason. If anything it was so when she came to equestria she would be able to see the world in a way not many ponies have.
Plus, asking that question only is very rude and thoughtless.
Now I've gotten that out of the way, when rd learned about what was in those sandwiches, by the way, love the Gordon ramzy pony refence
, I cracked myself laughing
But when pinkie started eating them again....
yeah, now I'm scared of that pink pony and I suddenly can't help but think of that cupcakes Fic. 
*shudders*
I look forward to the next chapter, where I am going to assume here that Kelly will politely decline Luna's offer, for it would mean robbing herself of something that has been a part of her since birth. In a sense it would be like a pony permanently losing their cutie mark
4289200 No! But I like Scottish people and their awesome dialects!
will this story ever be updated again because I really like this story