Day Seven (Pinkie's Day Off)
The streets of Ponyville was buzzing with activity once again as the town’s shops finished their morning routines and opened for business, with one notable exception. Sugarcube Corner was closed. The Cakes had made the decision to shut down for the day to have the entire store cleaned out from top to bottom due to an unfortunate accident the day prior. As a result, Pinkie had an opportunity to get away from the weirdness she had gone through on the job this past week. She had agreed to spend her off-day accompanying Applejack on her trip to Manehattan. Pinkie looked forward to whatever today had in store for her, not only because she was always happy to help out one of her friends, but after dealing with everything she’s dealt with this past week, she felt that any day trip away from work was definitely earned. Pinkie and Applejack were laughing their way through their conversation as they arrived at the Ponyville train station, Pinkie recounting some of the week’s finer moments to the cowpony.
“So Rarity threw the whole cake in that idiot’s face?” Applejack laughed in disbelief.
“She did!” Pinkie nodded. “You should have seen it. It was classic!”
“That stallion was lucky, though. If that happened to me, Ah would have gone apple bucking, if ya know what Ah mean.”
“Ouch! I felt that one!” Pinkie shuddered at the thought. “I’m just glad I don’t have to deal with crazy ponies like that today. Oh, I forgot to ask, what’s with the trip to Manehattan anyways, AJ?”
“Mah Aunt and Uncle Orange are thinking about adding an apple orchard on one of their farms and they want mah advice. Besides, it’s been a long time since Ah paid them a visit. Ah at least owe them a friendly hello. What about you, Pinkie? Have ya thought about what you’re gonna do in Manehattan?”
“Well, I’ve never been to the Clydesdale Building before. This would be the perfect chance to go!” Pinkie grinned.
Arriving at the train station, the two earth ponies took their place in the line that led to the ticket window. The line moved rather quickly and before they knew it, there was only one female pegasus standing in between them and the ticket agent at the window.
“How may I help you?” they overheard the stallion at the ticket window say to the pegasus customer.
“One ticket to Cloudsdale, please?” she asked, placing a few bits on the counter.
The ticket agent began to process the order for a few seconds but stopped when he took a mental note of the customer’s final destination. “Wait…I’m sorry. Where did you say you want to go?”
“Cloudsdale,” the pegasus answered.
“You want to take a… train… to Cloudsdale?” the agent asked slowly.
“It’s my sister’s birthday,” she explained. “I’m going to go and visit her. We have an awesome day planned and everything!”
Pinkie and Applejack both looked at each other wordlessly, silently asking each other if they had really heard what the customer had asked for. The ticket agent cringed awkwardly, trying to find the right words to say to the customer. “I’m sorry, ma’am. But I’m afraid we can’t get you to Cloudsdale.”
The customer’s face fell in panicked shock. “Why not? I thought these trains go all over Equestria!”
“Not... everywhere,” he said slowly, not believing he actually had to explain. “Our trains can’t reach Cloudsdale because Cloudsdale is in the sky, and our trains can’t go in the sky.”
“B-b-but… How am I supposed to get to Cloudsdale?!?” the customer panicked.
It was at that moment that Pinkie and Applejack decided to approach the pegasus.
“Excuse us, but I think we may have an answer to your problem, ma’am.” Pinkie said. “You can always use a balloon. That’s what I like to do since I don’t have wings or anything.”
“Speaking of wings…” Applejack cut in, “You’re a pegasus right? How good of a flyer are you?”
“Well… I’m not Wonderbolts material or anything, but I can fly all right, I guess,” the pegasus admitted.
“In that case, why not fly yourself there? Save yerself some bits while y’all are at it to boot.” Applejack suggested.
The pegasus’ mouth hung open as the idea registered in her head. “That’s a great idea! Why didn’t I think of that? Thank you!”
“Happy to help ma’am!” Applejack smiled.
With that, the pegasus flapped her wings a few times and took to the sky, heading straight for Cloudsdale.
“You know,” Pinkie began to wonder, “A trip to Cloudsdale sounds like a good idea.”
“We don’t have the cloud walking spell, Pinkie,” Applejack pointed out.
“I said it ‘sounded’ like a good idea.” Pinkie shrugged.
~~~~
After a rather peaceful train trip, Pinkie and Applejack found themselves inside the hustle and bustle of Manehattan’s Central Station, one of the largest and busiest train stations in Equestria. The large terminal was filled with ponies from everywhere either trying to catch or just getting off their trains. Pinkie looked around in awe at the sea of ponies inside the giant train station.
“It’s easy to forget how small Ponyville is compared to this place,” Pinkie mused out loud.
“You can say that again,” Applejack added. “And that smell from all these food carts are making me hungry. How ‘bout some lunch?”
“Great idea! Where do you want to eat?”
“Well, Ah heard there was a great sandwich shop near Madison Square Stables…”
“Excuse me!”
Applejack was interrupted by a voice calling out from behind them. Pinkie and Applejack turned to see a blond-maned unicorn mare with a pencil tucked behind her ear and a clipboard in her hoof. “Would you like to take a quick survey?” she asked them.
The two earth ponies looked at each other. They both shared an expression that conveyed the same thought, say no and walk away. However, both ponies’ friendly and helpful nature got the better of them and they both found themselves shrugging a hesitant yes.
“Sure,” Pinkie Pie replied to the survey pony.
Grinning from ear to ear, the survey taker levitated the pencil to the clipboard and began. “Do you eat beans?” she asked.
Applejack scratched the back of her head. “Well, Ah guess once in a while…” Before she was able to finish her thought, the survey taker made a quick note and moved on to the next question.
“Do you like beans?” she continued, not taking her eyes off the clipboard.
This time it was Pinkie who answered, arching her eyebrow in confusion. “I don’t mind beans, but…”
The survey taker never offered a response. She never even lifted her eyes from her clipboard. Rather, she made a quick note and went on to the next question. “Do you watch movies?”
“Of course!” Pinkie smiled. “Who doesn’t? They’re so much fun!”
A quick note on the clipboard later, the next question was asked. “Have you ever seen a movie with Vanilla Ice?”
Pinkie’s eyes went wide. “Wait. He’s still around?” she wondered out loud. It had been a while since she heard that name.
“Who the hay is Vanilla Ice?” Applejack asked.
“Trust me, you don’t want to know,” Pinkie shuddered at the bad memories that name conjured up.
The survey taker just went on to the next item on the survey. “Do you eat beans at the movies?”
Both Pinkie and Applejack looked at each other in confusion before shaking their heads.
“Have you ever seen Vanilla Ice at the movies?”
The two earth ponies slowly shook their heads again.
“Have you ever seen a movie with beans?”
“Hold up. Do you mean have Ah seen beans in the movie or in the theater?” Applejack asked.
“How many beans do you eat before you watch a movie?” the survey pony continued, not bothering to answer Applejack’s query.
Pinkie shrugged nervously. “I don’t know why it matters that much…”
“Have you ever seen a movie with Vanilla Ice eating beans?”
Applejack’s mouth flew open in surprised bewilderment. “…What the hay kind of question is THAT?!?”
“Excuse me, is there a point to any of this?” Pinkie tried to ask.
The survey pony continued on, ignoring any questions directed her way and instead started to rattle off a series of questions without even stopping for Applejack or Pinkie Pie to speak up. “Would you like to see a movie with Vanilla Ice eating beans? Would you rather eat beans or cucumbers at that movie? Have you ever eaten a cucumber at the movies? How many cucumbers have you eaten in the past month? What kind of beans do you prefer when you watch a movie with Vanilla Ice eating cucumbers? If a cucumber walked up to you right now, would you tell it that you enjoy Vanilla Ice movies with beans or with guacamole?” The survey taker kept on asking question after question, each one making less sense than the one before it.
“It’s not stopping!” Pinkie shouted in despair, her hoofs covering her ears in a vain attempt to block out the avalanche of survey questions.
Applejack had to fight the urge to gnaw her hat off in irritation. “We gotta get outta here! What do we gonna do, Pinkie?”
With the survey questions coming faster and more furious by the second, Pinkie came up with a quick idea. “Hey look! It’s Vanilla Ice!” Pinkie shouted, pointing to a random direction away from them.
Immediately, the survey pony stopped asking questions and ran straight towards the direction Pinkie was pointing. “Excuse me! Mr. Ice? Would you like to take a quick survey?”
“Run!” Pinkie whispered to Applejack.
Without any hesitation, the two Earth ponies rushed out of the train station. In another part of the station, the survey pony asked a confused white unicorn stallion with a flat-top mane for a moment of his time.
~~~~
Safely away from the train station, as well as that weird survey pony, Pinkie and Applejack took a few moments to enjoy the sights and sounds of Manehattan. It was the middle of the day and the sidewalks were filled with ponies going about their everyday business. A never-ending parade of taxi carts rolled down the streets, each one traveling towards a different destination. The two walked several blocks towards Horseshoe Circle and the numerous cafes and restaurants that line the busy plaza. Applejack led Pinkie towards one of these restaurants, which had a small sign that read ‘The Sandwich Stop’, and a street chalkboard just outside the door that listed the store’s specials.
“So this is the sandwich shop you were talking about, huh?” Pinkie asked Applejack.
“Yup. Apple Bloom said that Babs won’t stop talking about this store. Ah figured we should try it out as long as we’re in town.”
“Goody! I can’t wait!” Pinkie Pie smiled. “I heard Manehattan’s sandwich shops are known for their customer service.”
The two tourists entered the small store, a jingling bell ringing as they opened the door. The establishment was empty save for the young earth pony stallion with a mop-top mane working at the counter. He turned his attention to the newcomers as they entered the store.
“Welcome to The Sandwich Stop! Can I take your order?” the stallion asked.
Pinkie put a hoof to her chin as she began to read the menu. “You go ahead, AJ. I’m still trying to choose.”
“If ya say so, Pinkie.” Applejack turned to the worker. “Ah’ll have an apple and granola sandwich. Oh, and can you go light on the mayo, please?”
“Light on the mayo. All right!” the stallion nodded. He then ducked underneath the counter to search for something in one of the floor cabinets. A few short moments later, he pulled out a desk lamp from the cabinet onto the counter and turned it on. He then placed his jar of mayonnaise under the shine of the light bulb and took one step away so he can admire the glow. Pinkie and Applejack looked at each other in complete and utter confusion over the worker’s actions.
“Uh… What are you doing?” Pinkie asked
“Your friend said she wanted light on the mayo, so I’m putting a light on the mayo,” the worker explained.
Applejack groaned. “That’s not what Ah meant. Ah meant Ah wanted just a little mayonnaise on mah sandwich!”
The worker’s eye’s lit up in realization. “Oh! OK!” He then went underneath the counter again and pulled out a tiny doll-sized jar of mayonnaise and squeezed its contents onto the sandwich. “There you go! A little mayonnaise!” He smiled proudly.
For the second time that day, Applejack’s mouth flew open in surprised bewilderment. She began to start telling the stallion that she didn’t mean for a tiny jar of mayo on her sandwich, but she decided to let it be. Despite the bizarre display, her order was somehow fulfilled. She sighed, placed a few bits on the counter and accepted her sandwich. She began to take a few bites as the stallion turned his attention to Pinkie.
“Anything for you, ma’am?” he asked Pinkie.
Pinkie took one last look at the overhead menu, trying to decide what to order. “I still can’t decide. What’s today’s special?”
The worker shrugged. “I dunno. What is it?”
Pinkie blinked in confusion. “Hold up. Are you asking me what your special is?”
He nodded enthusiastically. “Yes! Nopony ever tells me these things. So what is our special, anyway?”
“I don’t know. I don’t work here!” Pinkie answered incredulously.
The confused worker tilted his head. “Then why did you order the special?”
“Because I thought you knew since you work here!” Pinkie shouted.
“Of course I work here!” the worker smiled. “I have this neat uniform and everything!”
Pinkie groaned in frustration. Applejack simply shook her head at the situation. This wasn’t the world-class customer service either pony was expecting.
“Look, forget the special,” Pinkie told the worker. “I’ll just have what my friend is having.”
The worker tilted his head again and then shrugged. “If you say so.”
Without warning, the worker reached over the counter and grabbed Applejack’s half-eaten sandwich from her hooves.
“What the...? Hey!” Applejack shouted.
“Here you go!” the worker said, handing the sandwich over to Pinkie. “But I don’t know why you want this one since your friend already started eating it.”
“I didn’t mean that I wanted her sandwich,” Pinkie clarified, giving the sandwich back to the apple farmer. “I wanted the second sandwich, made just like what Applejack has!”
The stallion scratched the back of his head. “You know for a simple order, this is getting kinda complicated.”
Pinkie facehoofed. She couldn’t even catch a break on her day off. “You know what? Forget the sandwich. I’ll just have a chocolate shake.”
“Sweet! One chocolate shake, coming up!” the worker grinned. Before Pinkie could react, the stallion grabbed two bottles of chocolate syrup, hopped over the counter, and begun to squirt the bottle all over her, covering the shrieking pink pony in runny, sticky chocolate syrup from her mane to her tail. Applejack froze, stunned and unable to process the antics that had befallen her friend.
“There we go! Now you have the chocolate, it's time for the shake.” He grabbed the chocolate covered Pinkie and rocked her back and forth. “Shake it all out! Work that chocolate!” He cheered, trying to encourage the movements out of the chocolate covered pony.
Enough was enough for the cowpony. She snapped back to reality. “That does it! Come on, Pinkie. We're getting outta here!” Applejack quickly grabbed Pinkie away from the worker and the two tourists made a quick exit from the store.
“Hey! I wasn’t done yet!” The worker shouted out, but he soon found himself once again alone in his store. He took a glance at the two bottles of chocolate still in his hooves and shrugged. “Oh well, more for me then!” He threw his head back and emptied the contents of both bottles into his mouth.
~~~~
Applejack’s temper was raging as she and Pinkie Pie walked down the street, both mares quickly trying to get away from that bizarre sandwich store as possible. “That had to be, hooves down, the worst sandwich shop in all of Equestria,” the cowpony grumbled. “What the hay was he even thinking back there?”
Pinkie was unsuccessfully cleaning off all the chocolate syrup off of her. “I think I still have chocolate syrup in my mane,” she groaned.
“We’ll get you all cleaned up as soon as we get to Aunt and Uncle Orange.”
“Thanks, AJ. I really hope they won’t mind if I...” Pinkie suddenly cut herself off and froze in place as something came up to her sights up ahead. “Oh no!” she squeaked out in fear.
Applejack followed her friend’s line of sight to the corner of the street where a cart was laid out displaying what looked like a wide selection of makeup and other assorted beauty products. Right beside the cart was a young pegasus mare, trying to get ponies to pay attention to the products on the cart. Pinkie and Applejack knew exactly what this display meant.
“A street vendor!” Pinkie quietly shrieked in fear.
“Just keep walking. Maybe she’ll leave us alone,” Applejack whispered back.
The two Ponyvillians continued their path down the sidewalk, hoping to the heavens that the vendor hadn’t noticed them. Unfortunately, their hopes were squashed when the vendor began to wave at them directly.
“Excuse me, ladies! A moment of your time?” the vendor asked. “I’ve got the beauty product to end all beauty products ready for you to take home today!”
“No thanks! We’re in a hurry,” Applejack quickly replied, trying really hard to avoid eye contact. Instead, the vendor drew closer to them.
“It'll just take a few seconds. I guarantee you'll love it.”
“Sorry. We're not interested,” Pinkie chuckled nervously. She tried to lead herself and Applejack across the street, but the vendor stood right in front of them before they could cross, happily showing off a small blue perfume bottle.
“But this is the Canterlot famous APON line!” the vendor smiled. “Nine out of ten ponies swear by it! It's a fantastic product. Here, let me show you.”
Without any warning, the vendor sprayed the some of the liquid in the bottle straight into Applejack’s face. The cowpony recoiled first in surprise, then into distress when she took in the perfume’s surprising potency. “Hey! What in tarnation are ya…” Applejack tried to shout.
The vendor pony replied by going into the sales pitch. “It's APON’s latest fragrance inspired by the fresh beauty of Neighagra Falls! It’s the current trend in Canterlot!” the vendor stated.
The aroma of the perfume was indeed strong, so strong that it made Pinkie recoil in disgust just by smelling it. “It smells like rotten eggs,” she gagged. She tried to help Applejack recover from being directly hit with the stuff, but the strong smell forced her to step away.
The smile on the APON pony persisted. “Trust me, this perfume is all the rage now. Everypony is wearing it. In fact, nine out ten ponies say that they have never smelt anything like that in their entire lives!”
Applejack coughed a few times thanks to the odor before she could add her two bits in. “Ah think there might be a very good reason why they said that! Dagnabit, that stuff got in mah eyes!” she grumbled, trying to wipe the nasty stuff off her face, her eyes watering more and more as the perfume’s stench lingered in the air.
The APON pony’s twitched with delight at the sight of what looked like tears forming in the cowpony’s eyes. “Wow! Another satisfied customer! Although, you might need some makeup to hide those tears of joy!”
Applejack shook her head. “Listen, ma’am, Ah don’t need any more…”
Before she could say anything else, the APON pony took out a large powder puff and patted it firmly several times into the cowpony’s face. She then, in one swift motion, opened up her makeup kit and began to work. Pinkie watched the pushy salespony work her ‘magic’ on her friend, completely stunned at the speed the APON pony was working. When she was done, Applejack’s face was left completely caked in white powder. The copious amounts of powder on her face made Applejack sneeze.
“And let’s not forget to add a little blush on those cheeks!” the salespony went ahead and applied a more than generous amount of red coloring to Applejack’s cheeks, creating two bright red spots on the sides of her face where her freckles were supposed to be.
“Just a small sample of APON’s Canterlot famous makeup line!” the APON pony smiled. “And it can all be yours for just 3 easy payments of 200 bits, plus shipping and handling. Order today and we’ll throw in APON’s world-famous mane straightener solution, now with 45% less bleach!” The salespony turned her attention to Pinkie, her smile growing more manic as she took a look at her frizzy mane. “You! How would you like a free sample of this award-winning mane straightener?”
Pinkie laughed nervously, backing away a couple of steps. “No thanks. I’m good!” she said, doing her best to add as much distance from the crazed salespony.
The APON pony closed in still. “Oh, but I insist! You simply must see for yourself what a fantastic product this is, no matter what those other lawyers said!”
That was enough for Pinkie. She turned around and ran away as fast as her hooves can gallop. The salespony took off to follow her down the street, holding her entire product line with her magic.
“Come back!” the APON pony shouted. “You still need to add APON to your life!”
“Please stay away from me!” Pinkie pleaded.
“Not until you experience the glory of APON!!!”
“DO NOT WANT!!!”
While Pinkie ran away from the salespony, Applejack remained where she stood when she got her unwanted makeover, completely unamused by the APON pony’s sales pitch, and how ridiculous it left her looking and smelling. Seconds later, a young colt and an older mare walked up to her.
“Mommy, look! A cowboy clown!” the colt shouted in glee, noticing Applejack’s ‘makeup’. He ran up to Applejack. “Can you make me balloon shaped cowboy boots, miss clown lady, please?”
Applejack groaned.
~~~~
It took a good 30 minutes before Pinkie and Applejack were able to shake off the salespony by the big Montgomery Stables flagship store. The encounter, unfortunately, left the two exhausted. Rather than taking the stroll they had planned to get to Aunt and Uncle Orange, they chose to try to hail a taxi instead. That decision went about as well as Applejack had previously predicted with Applejack now holding her hoof up on the sidewalk for a solid fifteen minutes, failing to signal over one of the many taxi carriages on the street. Applejack was getting impatient. “For the love of Celestia, there are literally thousands of taxis in this town. At least one of them has to be empty!”
“Either that perfume is chasing every taxi away, or everypony in Manehattan is afraid of clowns,” Pinkie bitterly joked, still attempting to get the last of the syrup out of her mane. “You know, this relaxing trip isn’t as relaxing as I thought it would have been.”
“Ah’m sorry we had to go through all this nonsense today, Pinkie. Especially after the week you had.” Applejack had wiped quite a bit of the makeup off her face, but visible streaks of white powder remained on her face.
“It’s all right, AJ. You didn’t know. Let’s just get to your Aunt and Uncle’s place before anything else happens to us.”
The two mares continued to wait as one occupied taxi after another passed down the street. Miraculously, only after a few extra minutes of waiting, an empty carriage pulled by a yellow Earth stallion with a black and white striped mane pulled over.
“Why hello there ladies!” the taxi pony smiled. “Where can I take you…”
The stallion’s smile turned to shocked surprise as he took a good look at the white powder and chocolate syrup on his two latest clients.
“Sandwich Stop?” he guessed, looking at Pinkie’s syrupy mane.
“Yup,” Pinkie nodded in defeat.
“APON lady?” he guessed again, looking at the leftover powder on Applejack’s face.
Applejack sighed, “Unfortunately.”
“Not to mention an extra helping of survey taker on the side, too,” Pinkie added.
The taxi stallion could only chuckle. “That’s Manehattan for ya!” He unharnessed himself from his taxi carriage and helped the two in. “You two don’t have to worry about them anymore. You’re safe with me.”
“We could have used that protection an hour ago!” Pinkie laughed.
“We need to get to 5421 Mane Street,” Applejack told the stallion as he got ready to pull the carriage.
“Yes, ma’am!” Once he made sure his two customers were comfortable inside the carriage, he quickly got back into his harness and began the trip. He noticed the look of relief etched all over the two mares’ faces. “You know, most Manehattanites would just shrug off all that stuff that happened to you today. You ladies from out of town?”
“We’re from Ponyville,” Applejack answered. “We’re just in town for the day so Ah can visit mah Aunt and Uncle.”
“And I’m just here to keep my friend company,” Pinkie shrugged.
“Ponyville, huh?” the driver chuckled. “I heard that it’s a really friendly place.”
“Most of the time” Pinkie mumbled under her breath. “But yeah! Ponyville is a really friendly place, and we just love meeting new friends.”
The stallion laughed. “Now before either of you get any ideas, I have to say that I’m a happily married stallion.”
“Aw nuts,” Pinkie frowned playfully.
Applejack stifled a laugh and turned to ask the stallion a question. “So how long have y’all been married?”
“Almost ten years now!” the stallion smiled.
Pinkie gasped. “Wow! Congratulations! Do you have a party in mind to celebrate? Parties are kinda my thing.”
“Not quite a party,” he shrugged. “I’m planning on taking her to Prance for our anniversary”
Applejack gave out a low whistle. “Hoo wee. A vacation to Prance? That must be expensive.”
The stallion’s pace slowed a bit. He gave out a disappointed sigh. “It is. I’ve had to work extra shifts here the past few months to afford it. But it’s worth it. I’ll do just about anything for her.”
“Sounds like you really love her. Don’t ya, sugar cube?”
“I really do,” the stallion sighed dreamily, the image of the mare of his life forming vividly in his mind I love everything about her. Her red mane. Her silver coat. That blue bow she ties to her tail.”
“Oh! You mean like that pony over there?” Pinkie pointed out to a figure walking up the sidewalk on their left side that matched the stallion’s description.
“Yes, just like that… pony… over…” the stallion trailed off as he took a good look at the pony Pinkie pointed to. The pony that matched that lovely image he adores. The pony that he has sworn his entire life to.
And the other stallion that pony was walking, talking, and laughing side by side with.
Who just so happened to give her a small kiss on her cheek.
The taxi suddenly stopped.
“Sir? Is something wrong?” Applejack asked.
“That can’t be...” he said in a stunned whisper.
Both Pinkie and Applejack took notice of the scene their driver was watching. As the three of them watched, the mare returned the kiss on the stallion’s cheek, and then shared a hug with the mystery stallion.
“I really hope that wasn’t your wife,” Pinkie said nervously.
“It’s her,” the driver confirmed. “And him!!!”
“Wait, who’s him?” Applejack asked.
Instead of getting an answer, the driver ran towards the hugging ponies, still harnessed with the carriage. Pinkie and Applejack tumbled a bit as the carriage suddenly jerked into action. The two tried to gather their senses a bit as the driver caught up with his target. He loudly cleared his throat to break the hug up. The mare and the mystery stallion turned around and froze as they saw the now angry taxi driver standing in front of them.
“Sweetie?!?” the mare shouted.
“Hello, Honey,” the stallion said, his voice cold as ice. He then turned to mare’s current companion. His tone grew even colder. “Hello, brother.”
“Uh… Hey little bro.”
“Mind explaining what’s going on with you two?”
The mare looked around nervously. “Well... you see…” Rather than explaining her actions, she suddenly grabbed her companion and the two began to gallop away.
“Oh no, you don’t!” Without thinking, the driver launched straight into a full gallop and began to chase after the two at full speed, not realizing that Pinkie and Applejack were still in the cab. The two were thrown back at the sudden change of speed.
“WHOA!!! What the hey are ya doin’!?” Applejack shouted, trying her best to remain straight in the now rocking cab.
“I’ve got some urgent business I need to take care of right now!” the driver’s focused remained on the fleeing ponies.
“But what about us? We’re still back here!” Pinkie shouted.
“This trip’s on the house, ladies. Just hold on! It might get a bit bumpy back there.”
“Thanks for the warning’!” Applejack sarcastically replied, trying her best to keep her hat on her head.
The chase continued at a full gallop down the busy Manehattan streets towards the city harbor. The fleeing couple made several quick last-second turns to try to shake off the taxi driver but managed to keep up with them stride for stride, miraculously avoiding several collisions with other pony carts on the street. Pinkie and Applejack held on for dear life as they were tossed back and forth inside the speeding cab.
The fleeing ponies made an attempt to lose the taxi through Palomino Square, galloping up then down the grand staircases that serve as entrances and exits to either end of the park. But the taxi kept pace. The driver barely lost a step on his targets as he ran up and down the stairs, still harnessed to the carriage, and its two passengers who were being thrown all over the inside of the carriage as it passed over each stair. Another attempt to evade the taxi was made by cutting inside the flagship Montgomery Stables department store, but the taxi driver never let up, choosing to pursue the couple by going inside the store, taxi carriage and all. He followed the couple, crashing himself, his carriage, and his passengers through several floors and several departments worth of merchandise. When the chase resumed outside, bits and pieces of the department store was dragged outside by the taxi carriage. Pinkie somehow was now wearing Applejack’s hat and was now sporting high-end sunglasses, a polo shirt, and a set of golf clubs. Applejack, meanwhile, found herself wearing a wedding dress, bouquet and all.
The two terrified passengers were able to shake off the extra clothing quickly, just in time to notice the chase targets had pulled ahead a bit and were now going over the Mane Street drawbridge that passed over the harbor. And that the drawbridge began to rise, lifting up and apart for the ship ready to pass through. Traffic up ahead stopped for the bridge. Except for the taxi. The driver lowered his glare at his escaping target.
“Hold on, ladies!!!” he shouted.
With that, the driver plowed through the stop barrier and ran up the rapidly inclining bridge. Pinkie and Applejack clutched each other in terror and screamed. The gap created from the drawn bridge must have been at least 50 feet by the time they reached the top. Surely, they would not make the jump and would fall straight into the river below. The driver grunted and screamed as he took a mighty leap across the gap. Time seemed to slow down while the taxi was in mid-air. Despite the long odds, the driver made the leap with just inches to spare. Now on the other side, the driver renewed his focus to catch his special somepony and his brother.
In all, the full-gallop chase lasted a full 15 minutes, which felt closer to 15 hours for the hapless taxi passengers. But the chase finally came to an end at the harbor itself, the southern tip of the busy city. The couple had made one last-ditch attempt to flee only to run straight into a dead-end alley. The driver, huffing from exhaustion, blocked the only way out with the cart. He unharnessed himself and marched right up to the cornered ponies. Pinkie and Applejack, meanwhile, were left stunned, dazed, shaken, and thankful that they had survived the chase.
“Applejack?”
“Yes, Pinkie?”
“Next time I have a day off, let’s just play board games in my room. Ok?”
“Deal.”
The two friends watched the taxi driver confront his wife and brother from the safety of the carriage.
“What in the wide world of Equestria is going on?!?” the driver asked.
Before the brother could say anything, the wife spoke up. “Please, don’t get mad at him. This is all my fault. I can explain everything.”
“Can you?” the driver asked dangerously.
The mare sighed. Tears began to freely fall from her face. “You’ve been working so late these past few days. I… I got so lonely. And your brother came by one day to check to see if I was ok, and… and then the next thing I know, I… I….” she wasn’t able to finish before she collapsed in a full round of tears.
The stallion lowered his head in shame. “Little bro… I have no excuse. You have every right to be mad at us.”
“Being mad doesn’t even begin to describe what I’m feeling right now!” The taxi driver shouted.
The brother winced a bit. He took a deep breath and continued. “What we did was wrong. I’ll understand if you never want to talk with us ever again.”
The taxi driver glared at his weeping wife and his repentant brother. He tried to muster up the energy to unleash the wrath of Tartarus on them as they so rightly deserved. But instead, his eyes filled up with tears. “I can’t,” he found himself saying. “I can’t do that! I love you both. I always will. We’ve been through so much together to make me feel otherwise. But this… I don’t know if I can deal with this right now.”
On trembling legs, the wife tried to choke out an apology through her sobs. “Please forgive me. I’m so, so sorry!”
The taxi driver lowered his head. “Now’s not the time for this, Honey. I’ve already had a long day today. The three of us are gonna have a loooong talk as soon as I drop my latest clients off at their destination.”
“Hey, bro? About your clients...” The brother suddenly spoke out in terror.
The taxi driver turned back to the parked carriage ready to deliver his customers to their destination. But when he saw the carriage, it, along with its two occupants, had started to roll back all on its own. He froze when he realized that in the insanity of the past few minutes, he forgot one important detail.
The street they were on was on an uphill slope. And he never set the carriage’s parking brake.
The driver, his wife, and his brother could only look in horror as the carriage rolled towards the harbor. The heard Pinkie and Applejacks screams of terror as the taxi carriage reached the bottom of the slope, crashed through one of the harbor’s safety barrier, and landed right into the murky Manehattan waters.
It was at that very moment a clipboard-toting unicorn mare came across the scene and went up to the taxi driver.
“Excuse me, sir? Would you like to take a quick survey?” she asked with cheerful ignorance.
The taxi driver sighed. His long, impossible day just got even longer.
~~~~
Luna’s moon had begun to rise over the horizon when the Oranges finally realized that their expected visitors still had not shown up. Applejack’s Aunt looked at the grandiose grandfather clock in their foyer in confusion.
“Weren’t Applejack and her friend supposed to be here four hours ago?” she asked.
Uncle Orange simply shrugged. “You know this city, dearest. Any number of things could have delayed them. I’m sure they’ll be around shortly.”
Aunt Orange continued to worry for a few extra minutes when their doorbell rang. She let out a sigh of relief. “That must be them now!”
She trotted over to the front door, opened it, and froze in surprised shock.
Standing in front of her were a very, VERY angry Pinkie Pie and Applejack, both soaking wet, covered in seaweed and random scraps of litter and Celestia knows what that had found its way to the harbor, and both emitting a foul odor that nopony would want to guess where it originated from.
Aunt Orange was able to get over her initial shock of the state of the two house to speak. “What in heavens happened to you two?”
“DON’T! ASK!” Pinkie and Applejack answered in unison.
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I think after this week Pinkie is going to need a major stay vacation on her family's rock farm just to unwind. Hopefully she can have an uneventful next week!
When I saw the title I thought Pinkie was going to go trough some 'I don't work here' issues but no...
...no this was much worse.
Aaaand you've earned a Follow! Well done!
This describe's every city in real life great work.
The part with the vendor reminded me of this video
I laughed so hard! And cringed and bemoaned every misfortune that befell Applejack and Pinkie.
I missed this story so much! Nice update!
Next trip Dashie takes Pinkie out for a night on the town in CLoudsdale...but then more troubles happen.
8787048
Who is on first
Did they just encounter Ed from Good Burger?
Good thing that one stallion wasn't a sandwich artist, or he might've put Manets on Applejack's sandwich.
Put another way, only one out of ten ponies have ever had eggs go bad on them.
Also, sounds like the last part covered up any remnant of the rest of it.
8788518
Oh we had a bathroom, its just the public couldn't use it because of insurance reasons. Can't let people use the toilet if its connected to the stock room where the beer and cigarettes are. They'd close one door then rob us blind, then walk out the door when we aren't looking.
I hope that last guy wasn't actually expecting to be paid.
Heh heh heh...
Classic.
Further proof of why Darwinism shouldn't be suppressed, but embraced
8788024
I just re-read that scene with his voice, and holy hell does it work!
I really wanted the taxi driver to just beat the ever loving shit out of his brother and maybe slap his wife or something. I mean seriously 10 years of commitment, the guy works late to get enough money to pay for a special trip and this dudes own brother swoops in to cheat on his wife! That asshole deserved a good kick in the nads at least. And this is someone from pony Manhattan. If that was any New Yorker his brother would be dead as fuuuuuuuck! Lord knows I’d cheer if those two got some actual cumupance.
Damn, hell of a very wild day. I feel so bad for them.