• Published 13th Oct 2014
  • 16,162 Views, 2,332 Comments

Dante's Little Apple Surprise - Tatsurou

Dante juggles fighting demons and raising a baby Applejack while trying to stay as laid back as he's always been.

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Clowns Can Be Funny

After a good deal of climbing, Dante eventually encountered a massive, flying, centipede like monster. It did not prove to be challenging to kill, merely frustrating due to its habit of hiding inside walls. Even when it started launching balls of electricity, Applejack deflected them by spinning the Cerberus around over her head, one prong clutched in her mouth. The single, stretched out call of "Baaaaaaall!" from the weapon was easier to ignore than the rapid shouts that occurred when she was firing the blasts of ice.

Eventually, with one last scream of pain, the creature went down, falling apart as it crashed into the ground. Dante, for his part, landed lightly on his feet after leaping from the back of the dying creature. Applejack was gurgling happily, apparently having enjoyed every minute of the fight.

Heading into the next room, Dante acquired an artifact, the purpose of which was not immediately apparent. Stowing it, he tried to go back the way he came, only for the door to deny him entry. He attempted to force his way through, but each physical assault was denied. As he drew his guns, though, a sudden call interrupted him.

"Yoo hoo!" the voice called. A clown like figure approached from behind Dante. "There's no reason to resort to violence, devil boy-"

"Ball!" the Cerberus barked as Applejack whacked the clown on the top of the head with one of the prongs.

The jester stared at AJ for a moment. "Don't do that," he said grumpily. As Dante prepared to shoot the door anyway, the jester rushed in front of him. "Wait, wait, wait, better listen to what others have to say, lad."

Dante lowered his weapons, resigned to listen.

The jester continued with a smirk. "This tower is very sturdy, you see." He rapped on the door. "Your tricks will do no good." He lunged towards Dante playfully. "No good-"

"Ball!" Cerberus announced again as Applejack gave the jester another smack on the forehead.

The jester looked crosseyed at Applejack for a bit, before returning his attention to Dante, only to be nose to muzzle with Ebony. "Zip it," Dante ordered, "or I'll pierce that big nose."

"That could be a problem," the jester admitted, before dodging around to Dante's side. "Just hear me out. You've got nothing to lose, right?"

Applejack raised Cerberus again, but Dante grudgingly signaled her not to swing.

The jester stepped back. "My name is Jester, and I know a thing or two about this place. That thing there," he continued, pointing, "is a power generator for this entire sector. In order to open the door, you need to apply a little something to it first. Do you know what that is, kid? Or is that too difficult for you-"


Jester lunged forward at Applejack. "Stop! Doing that-"


Jester tumbled over, clutching at the last impact point which had not been his head. "I was just...trying to help..."

"I'm sure-"

Before Dante could finish his sentence, Applejack had somehow unsheathed Rebellion and tried to swing it at Jester. He disappeared, however, and the sword impacted the device by the door that Jester had been indicating. The door slid open.

Taking his sword back, he resheathed it. "Good thinking, AJ," he complimented. Applejack giggled happily. With no sign of the Jester, Dante continued on.

Outside the room, the Jester's laugh could be heard. "Thanks for destroying the lock for me, little pony. Welcome to hell, both of you!" A fountain suddenly started overflowing with blood. "Here's a little gift for you!"

The statues holding the fountain up came alive as they became soaked with blood.

"Ball! Ball! Ball!"

Three shots of ice froze the statue beasts, leaving Dante to smash them. "Is that all? I was expecting something better," Dante gloated. Seeing a portal open, he rushed into it.

The Jester then began his attack. At first he proved difficult to hit, as he was able to easily evade bullet fire and teleport out of the way of physical assaults. However, when he first teleported behind Dante...


Jester fell over in agony, as the thrown Cerberus returned to AJ's hoof after rapidly delivering blows to a most sensitive target. Dante couldn't help but chuckle. "First time I've ever seen a clown be funny," he taunted.

Glowering, Jester teleported himself away. Dante then went back through the portal that opened.

Back in the main portion of the tower, Dante went back to climbing up, looking for the place he could use the artifact he had acquired. Upon finding the proper point to use it, it opened up a path...back near the bottom. Shaking his head in resignation, he headed back down as AJ giggled away on his back.

Once back down, he acquired another item to open further paths. Thankfully, a jump plate had also activated to let him scale up this section of the tower rapidly. He made use of it as he sought out where to use this new tool.

"This is going to take a while," he mumbled under his breath, feeling Applejack lean against his back as she started to doze off for a nap, cuddling Cerberus.

After a while of searching and fighting - a long enough while, at any rate, for AJ to wake up and start complaining about being hungry - Dante found where he was supposed to use the new tool. He did so after giving AJ a slice of pizza that had somehow wound up in his jacket pocket when he left. Since all the pepperoni had fallen off, he didn't see anything on it that could be bad for a pony (after all, it was just grain, fruit, and dairy). She also seemed to enjoy it, although she did make a mess eating it. He wiped her face with his hand, then let her lick it clean, before heading to grab the artifact revealed.

After collecting the Soul of Steel, though, more demons showed up. He smirked over his shoulder at Applejack. "Ready to work off that pizza?" he asked.

Applejack grinned back eagerly, swinging Cerberus over her head and nearly clocking him on the side of the head with it.

Laughing after ducking, Dante leapt into the fray.

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