Dear Pinkie
I am not much of a dating kinda stallion, but I have a huge crush on this mare I know. We're really good friends and I have been trying to show her how much I like her, but I can't find the courage to tell her and I feel my lack of knowledge on relationships (I have never dated anypony before) that I might end up blowing it up and failing at being a good coltfriend. What should I do?
From
Emerald Knight
A friend in need
One thing to remember is to be a friend. It’s the most important part of everything ever! Listen to her when she needs you. Buy her gifts (flowers, chocolate)! Every girl likes little gifts that show that you’re thinking about her! Especially if it’s food. ESPECIALLY.
Be there for her. Treat her like family, but better. Because duh, if you treated her like family, she wouldn’t be your marefriend! She’d just be your friend! (Which is still good thing! The friendzone isn’t a bad thing.)
As for asking her out...well, Twilight says I’m not very subtle, so maybe you shouldn’t be asking me. Just go with your gut! That’s what I do! Maybe that’s why Twi says I’m not subtle.
Advice Pinks,
Any tips on how to get rid of haters? If not it's ok.
~A Pegasister.
Bake them cookies! That’s what I do! They usually go away after that.
Pinkie,
I have this mare you see, this mare that I just have to get rid of... if you catch my drift. This mare has done nothing but poop on my life and take everything that was supposed to be mine! Because of her I'm stuck as some has-been prodigy and will never get the recognition that I've been promised to all my life!
You know what, screw Twilight Sparkle. There, I said it! Pinkie, if you wanna make big bits then help a pony out and kill Twilight for me. She'd never suspect it from you, and the authorities would never suspect it either. I got more jewels than you can imagine from the palace and you'll have every bit of them. Think about it, you can open up your own bakery instead of working for some fat balloon and
some orange loser that I don't even know what's wrong with him. You can even have your own house. Best part, no more Twilight! Be honest, Pinkie, her know it all, goodie-two-shoes attitude has been old for a while now and Equestria would a less annoying place without her. So whaddya say, we down for this or what?
~Sunset Shimmer, future Princess of Equestria and the world.
P.S. Twilight said you're annoying. She also said that pink's her least favorite color.
P.P.S. Pink is my favorite color. Just sayin'.
Well, I kinda just printed your letter in the newspaper. Sooooooo, yeah, the police'll probably be trying to find you now, and I kind of gave them the address you sent the letter from. Sorry! I’m a responsible citizen, and it was my duty!
(Hehe, “duty.”)
But how did you get this letter here? Did you bribe Discord? Did you bribe a royal guard? Are you really here in Equestria?!
Wait, you can't respond because I'm writing this a newspaper. Well, I hope the police can find you! Not that we can't possibly be friends, but you were rude and mean to Twilight and also kinda just committed treason.
P.S. I’ve always known Twilight’s favorite color isn’t pink! I really doubt it’s her least favorite, because I don’t think she really cares about favorite colors. She calls it “juvenile.”
P.P.S. But I think we both secretly know her favorite color is [REDACTED].
Ummm, Ms. Pinkie?
I have a little problem. I recently moved to Ponyville and met up with an old friend of mine. Diamond Tiara's her name. Of course we had planned on picking our friendship up where we left off...but for some reason, ever since everypony in my new class found out Diamond was my friend, everypony's been avoiding me. And I mean EVERYPONY. I don't think I DID anything wrong...I'm starting to wonder if they just don't like Diamond or something. What do I do?!
~Beauty Split
I’ve overheard the Cutie Mark Crusaders talk about Diamond Tiara, and it seems like she’s kinda a bully, so they think you’re also a bully, I think. Isn’t that crazy?! I mean, judging someone by their (old) friends before you’ve talked to them? That’s just silly!
What you could do is bring in snacks for the whole class. I mean, who doesn’t like food? Plus, while it won’t really get any friends yet, maybe they’ll start warming up to you. Then, what you need to do is to start talking to the ponies in your class. If they ignore you, maybe hold a “Get to Know Me Party!” for the whole class! I’ll help! Really, all you need to do is to keep trying. Be confident! Make friends! Have fun!
Smile on~!
Hey, Pinkie!
What do I do if a pony hates me for no reason at all? I've tried to ignore them, but they keep going out of their way to shove/bump into me, or even call me a word that I shouldn't really say.
'B' with an 'itch'
(I assure you, no crushes. This pony is female, and I am female as well)
What do I dooo?? Please help!!
~ Short Stories
P.S. This girl would look at me strangely, then possibly throw my cookies away if I baked her any, then continue to be a jerk to me.
6425012
Thanks!
How is babby formed?
6425211
What? Do you mean "baby"?
Dear Pinkie: I think that last letter person identity was a fake (so that person commited both treason and identity theft.)
6425235
(psst...you do realize the last letter wasn't Sunset but instead a foal?)
6425221
how girl get pragnent?
6425240 Whoops sorry i meant second to last.
Dear pinkie
Its hard you know, being one of the few humans in equestria, you know everyone-i mean everypony is mean to me
Do you have some advice of making friends or not making anypony not accuse me of foalnapping or murder for no reason...
...just because im a human
From
A lonely human
I call shenanigans on that "Sunset Shimmer" letter. I think that was Trixie...or maybe Starlight Glimmer.
Hmm, advice from Pinkie... rather good advice so, this is going to be something I'll be following indeed. Perhaps when questions are needed I could submit my own sort of question. (at least when the author isn't being buried in them.)
Beauty Split! I dig it.
I have a friend, but my friend's family doesn't like me and I don't understand why. I suspect his family is trying to keep us apart. What should I do?
Dear Pinks,
Why do people keep posting questions when you're not taking them anymore because you still have a huge backlog? Maybe the editor needs to put that note at the front of the next chapter instead of the end.
Yours Deeply and Truly,
fart
6428770
Oh. Maybe that is a good idea. I didn't think of that. Thanks. (Since this is kinda more for me than Pinkie, are you okay with me not answering it? Because this question would be in week 20 or 21 since I have this thing where I absolutely have to go in order.)
6430134
Nope, I'm cool - I presented it as a 'question' just because humor.
Thanks for answering kinda made me feel better
6468166
You're welcome! Glad I could help!
Do you think the Crystal Empire should have a party ponie like you?
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Guess who frickin' finally answered you guys' questions?
It's not my fault! You're the one who left me for three years!
I-I'm sorry, Pinkie. ;~;