Ch13 - Royal Guards vs The Wonderbolts
My Little Medic
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Chapter 13
Royal Guards vs The Wonderbolts
“I must say, I’m surprised, Spike. I didn’t expect my brother to hold his ground like this,” Twilight said as she looked at the scoreboard, which was showing two points for each team. “I saw this coming that the Wonderbolts will be winning against pegasi guards, but for them to lose similar amount of goals on the ground is surprising.”
“What did you expect?” Spike asked as he looked at the little mare on his shoulder. “Your brother is expert when it comes to defense. Its his special talent and all.”
Twilight nodded as she reasserted herself on the drake’s shoulder. “True, but I didn’t expect they would do so well in the offensive.”
Spike rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “Yea… that’s suspicious…How could he gather such a skilled team in such short amount of time?” His attention shifted to Wave Chill and Soarin, who were now drinking water delivered by Steel Blade while massaging their aching backs. “Aren’t you going to heal your team? They got a heavy beating just now.”
Twilight jumped onto Spike’s nose and shook her head. “Not really. According to my research, pegasi posses very flexible bones. As long as they don’t hit anything sharp, they can crash into obstacles with great speed and get out with just a few bruises. Besides, the match is still going.” She pointed towards Soarin’ who returned to defend the ground goal. “Unless it is an emergency, I can’t distract my team by healing mere bruises. I will just need to wait until first half of the match ends.”
Spike ignored words of the little mare as he examined movements of unicorn and earth pony guards, somewhat surprised by their speed and skills. There's no way Canterlot guards can be that good. Where did Twilight’s brother get those ponies? Suddenly, he felt something pushing his fingers. He looked down at his hand and quickly noticed Twilight asserting herself on it.
“If you wanted to sit on my hand, you could’ve just asked,” Spike said, but Twilight shook her head as she pressed each hoof against each of Spike’s fingers.
“I have been sitting for far too long. Because of my increased reading, I ended up way behind in my exercises,” Twilight responded from her spot on drake’s hand.
Spike tilted his head to the side. “You want to train here and now? You will miss the entire match.”
Twilight smiled cheerfully. “I already thought of that, but I need your help.”
“Sure, what do you need me to do?”
“Tighten your fist while I will use my strength to resist.” Noticing a look on Spike’s face that spoke ‘seriously’, she added, “Just position your hand so I can watch the game, and don’t hold back on me. I need to be in shape to beat my brother in hoof wrestling.”
Spike’s mouth opened agape before he shook his head. “You wrestle against your brother? While being so small?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “I don’t wrestle against my brother. I hoof wrestle against him.” Seeing that the confusion on Spike’s face grow with her every word, she added, “I wrestle against his hoof. Foreleg to be precise. So far he is winning every time, but I will beat him someday.”
“First, why I never noticed, second, why won’t you use your magic to even the odds?” Spike asked as he tightened his fist, but his fingers meet with impressive resistance as Twilight’s legs trembled, but didn’t bend. He put more strength into his hand, flexing Twilight’s legs a little as she grit her teeth.
Twilight took a moment to regain lost ground before raising her head to look Spike in the eyes. “This… wouldn't… b-be… f-f-fair!” She took a quick breath and finished, “B-besides… we p-prefer t-to… do it in p-pr-private!”
Spike rolled his eyes before moving his hand so his adoptive mother could see both playing teams while resisting his crushing hold. On one side, he found it uncomfortable. Crushing his unicorn mother as if she was some sort of bug, causing her discomfort and maybe even pain. Even if for her it was just a mere exercise, it didn’t seemed right.
On another side, he found a weak pleasant feeling of dominance, as if he was a huge powerful dragon forcing a lesser being into submission. Were those his dragon instincts kicking in, or just a satisfying experience of being bigger, of feeling like a grownup rather than a child?
Suddenly a thought crossed his mind. I will one day grow into a large dragon, big enough to crush a pony by making one wrong stomp. He looked at Twilight who was sweating before his very eyes, but didn’t let his fist to close. He smiled, On the second thought. Twilight will return to her normal size one day… and she will keep me from hurting others. It will be as if nothing changed… but for how long? He shook his head before depression could overtake him. Happy thoughts, Spike. Happy thoughts.
The moment first half of the match was over, Shining Armor and his team were on the way to the locker-room, a place where they would rest for several minutes while discussing a new strategy. Suddenly, the captain stopped in his tracks while giving his confused team a awkward smile. “G-go right ahead. I have something to take care of first.”
His subordinates saluted and went ahead, leaving their commanding officer to face his very special somepony. Shining Armor approached Cadence who was sitting with crossed arms while shooting him a disapproving glare. “Hey there Cadence. I know that we are losing, but we will get ahead in the next round.”
“That’s not why I’m angry, Shiny,” she said with a firm tone as she gestured for the officer to sit. He followed the command without hesitation. Cadence pointed at her hoof accusingly at him, “You pulled the elite guards that auntie Celestia and former captain Brave Blade picked up personally to assist in capturing Nightmare Moon,” she whispered.
With a stomp of her hoof, she continued with much louder tone. “Those elites were training for many years to be our secondary line of defense, should Twilight fail. They were training hard to support their ruler in disarming and capturing her corrupted sister, Princess Luna.” She facehooved while finishing, “And you are calling upon them for a hoofball game?”
“Not so loud.” Shining Armor rubbed back of his neck before responding, “Besides, those are the best guards I got.” Noticing a disapproving stare of Cadence, he spread his forelegs and said, “And what you expected me to do? Pick up random guards from Canterlot with barely any time to prepare to face a group of elite fliers?” Noticing a firm nod, he said, “The Reputation of the Royal Guards is on the line. The Wonderbolts for the past few days proved that they are the elite of pegasi when it comes to flight and skills. It’s only fair to face them with elite guards.”
Cadence sighed before massaging her own forehead. “Alright.” She raised her head and looked at the stallion suspiciously, “Is there anything else you aren’t telling me?”
“Of… of course not,” Shining responded while looking to the side.
“Shinnii...ing,” Cadence said with a low tone.
The stallion bit his lips and looked to the side.
“Shining!”
The guard closed his eyes and crossed his forelegs.
Cadence pulled her special somepony’s ear with her magic as she tilted her head towards it and whispered, “Shining. You’re going to tell me the truth, or else you can forget about nuzzling, cheek kissing and the shoulder massage for next month. And I won’t take you for a night flight over beach for our next date.”
Shining Armor’s closed his eyes again, this time more tightly as he quietly whimpered. His crossed forearms slowly lowered to the ground. “Alright…” he started before looking at the smirking mare. “You won. I will tell the truth.”
“I am listening,” Cadence said as she exposed her ear.
“I wanted to... to impress Spitfire and Twilight while keeping reputation of the guards intact.”
Cadence sat as she asked in calm tone, “You wanted to impress Spitfire?” She frowned before poking neck-protection of on Shining’s chest with a hoof. “Now listen here Shiny. Spitfire is already taken, so don’t even think about hitting on her, unless you want to see what a jealous alicorn is capable off.”
Shining took a step back and blushed as his mouth opened agape. He raised his foreleg defensively before shaking it. “No no no, you got it all wrong.”
“Go on,” Cadence said with crossed forelegs and head turned to the side as she looked at her special somepony with one eye. “And your excuse better be good.”
Shining rubbed back of his neck as he said hesitantly, “Well… it’s just that. The Wonderbolts improved a lot since the Fillydelphia incident, and they did their best to prove it. I couldn’t let Spitfire see incompetence and weakness from my Royal Guards after that.”
“So you pulled the best into this match to prove that guards aren’t worse, and to earn the respect of the Wonderbolts,” Cadence asked as she studied Shining’s every move with a judging stare. Upon noticing a hesitant nod while looking him in the eyes, she said, “I believe you.” Her serious expression turned into a pleading as she said with worry, “But please, Shiny. I know you always mean well, but don’t do anything dumb.”
“Of course I won’t,” he responded as a awkward chuckle followed. Upon noticing a ‘are you really?’ look on Cadence’s face, he added slowly, “I… I promise to try… Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a team to motivate. See you later Cadence.”
“Time to finish this!” Spitfire shouted as her team cheered and charged towards the aerial goal of the guards. She took a quick look at the scoreboard, which showed seven points for her team and just six for opposition. Her attention shifted to the goal as she approached towards it with great speed.
“Spitfire!” Blaze shouted as he bounced white ball on his head before swinging his hindleg and kicking it to his captain.
Spitfire flew towards the incoming projectile, her hind leg prepared to deliver a solid kick and send it into goal of opposite team. She grit her teeth as drops of sweat started to form on her forehead. Suddenly the projectile changed it’s course, now falling directly towards the ground.
“Not this time,” the unicorn guard said with a mocking salute as he was being held by a pegasus guard.
“You Wonderbolts think you control the skies, well, maybe, but lets see how well you will do on the ground,” the pegasus added before flying down to the ground alongside his comrade.
Spitfire raised her eyebrow. “Oh, if that’s how you want to play, games on!” she said to herself before following. Other pegasi flew down as well as if they were meteors raining from the sky. Much to her confusion, two unicorn guards seemed to hold both balls with their levitation, escorted by 3 earth ponies form two sides and behind, while 4 pegasi flew above them. Despite the guards staying in formation, they kept some distance from each other.
The Wonderbolts quickened their pace, quickly catching up with the guard’s formation. Spitfire and Fleetfoot flew ahead to kick the levitated hoofballs. Before their legs struck the targets, both balls were levitated to earth ponies on both sides.
Lighthoof and Rapidfire blocked their ways, forcing the stallions to kick the balls upward toward the pegasi. Blaze and Flag Collector noticing it, went to intercept, but the guards already predicted it, kicking both balls between each other while spreading up the formation even more.
Predicting the trajectory of the kicked ball, Fleethoof flew to intercept with a spinning kick. The noises of pain followed as she started to hold her hind legs while her wings flapped rapidly, holding her in place. After a moment to regain her composure, she noticed that the kicked projectile was captured by a levitation field, while her own leg had a visible mark on it. “Those guards may be slower, but they sure deliver a punch,” she said to herself, wondering if maybe not all soldiers are just for show.
Spitfire and Rapidfire started to fly around the unicorns at extreme speed, creating a tornado while breaking the levitation hold over the ball. Noticing it, an earth pony guard charged right in, galloping towards the circling ball while not bothered by the wind. With one strong jump, he tackled the ball with his head as it flew straight out of the tornado.
The pegasus guard intercepted the projectile with his head, bouncing it upward before following it.
With Whirlwind, Hurricane and Winter Wonder still receiving their punishment by the princess herself, the Wonderbolts were forced to fill the defense for this match with less experienced members, as result, leaving Clashing Strike as a goalkeeper and Ace Lottery on defense.
With most Wonderbolts still fighting for the ball on the ground, Ace Lottery was left alone to intercept two pegasi guards. Her breathing became heavy and sweat started to drop from her head as the guards just passed the ball to each other. With growing determination, she predicted it’s movement and dashed to the side, just in time to intercept the ball in mid air with her own belly.
Yelp of pain followed as Ace Lottery grabbed her own stomach with her forelegs while curling into a ball, her wings tied together as she started to fall.
Wave Chill noticing it flew upward, abandoning her post on the ground, while one pegasi guards turned back to catch her as well. The Wonderbolt grabbed Ace Lottery as she shot a glare at the guard, who just returned it with applogic stare before flying towards the Wonderbolts’ aerial goal.
“Are you okay?” Wave Chill asked as her attention was focused on a mark on Ace’s belly.
“I’m f-fine... I messed up, didn’t I?”
“Yes you did. It was something I would expect from Flutter Bolt, but not from you.”
Ace Lottery chuckled before gritting her teeth. With push of her wings, she freed herself from Wave’s hold and pointed towards the ground. “Shouldn’t you be assisting Soarin’ on defense instead of rescuing me? I should only accumulate a few scratches at best.”
Wave Chill rubbed back of her neck nervously, “Yeah… but I couldn’t leave you like that, besides, I’m sure that Flutter Bolt has it covered.” She looked down to estimate the situation, her eyes opened widely at what she saw: Flutter Bolt was lying on top of Soarin’, while a large hole was visible on goal’s net with few burning ropes. The ball itself was shattered to pieces, and there was a cracked dent on stadium’s wall behind the goal.
Wave Chill gulped and said, “Remind me… to never underestimate earth ponies.”
Ace Lottery massaged her own belly, wondering how much worse it would be to intercept ball kicked by a large and well trained earth stallion. She resisted urge to return her dinner as she looked at Soarin’ with pity. “S-sure.”
“By the way, shouldn’t we assist in defending the aerial goal?” Wave Chill asked.
Ace Lottery looked up towards aerial goal, “Oww…” She looked down at the ground, “oww...” and finally at the scoreboard, showing seven points for the Wonderbolts, and eight for the opposition. “Owww… Ponyfeathers!”
***
Spitfire facehooved as two rookies held their forehooves together in apologetic gesture, their heads lowered. She looked at Soarin’ who held the hoofball in his forehoof. A puppy pout on his face. She next turned towards saluting guards who no doubt did it in a mocking gesture before they returned to their assigned positions.
She looked around for the sign of the closest referee and flew towards him as she said, “Time out. I need to discuss strategy with my team.”
The referee looked at the timer on the scoreboard, which showed ten minutes before the end of the match. With a firm nod, he responded. “Alright, Miss Spitfire. Per rules, you have right to two five minutes long breaks each match.” With flap of his wings, he flew upward and whistled before announcing a short break.
***
Shining Armor was sitting while supporting his shoulder against a post of his goal. Ever since the Wonderbolts focused on defense rather than offense on the ground, his role of a goalkeeper started to bore him.
His smirk after his last successful tactic didn’t leave his face for past ten minutes as his team was now in advantage, and there was only five minutes left before end of the match. At this point, it can end with our victory or a draw, no other way around it, he thought while looking upward, his attention focused on aerial goal. All we need to do is play defensively.
After making sure that three pegasi were holding three unicorns to protect aerial goal against Wonderbolts’ counterattack, he lowered his head to look at his defenders. Three stallions whose strength broke through Wonderbolts’ defenses more than once, and a pegasus who was there for aerial support. As he expected, the Wonderbolts attacking against the aerial goal. Seems it will be draw after all.
Much to his surprise, three Wonderbolts dived down. What are they doing?
“Sir, the enemy incoming from twelve o’clock.”
Shining looked forward, his attention now focused on Flutter Bolt and Wave Chill who flew towards his goal while kicking a bronze ball to each other. With growing determination, he stood firmly as if taking a fighting stage, his horn lit. “If that’s how they want to play it,” he started before inhaling air into his lungs. He yelled, “Have at you!”
One of the stallions and a pegasus charged forward, ready to intercept the rookies.
Wave Chill flew upward, away from the earth pony’s range while bouncing the ball on her head. The pegasus guard moved to block his way, but the Wonderbolt predicted his move and waited for him to get closer before passing the ball to Flutter Bolt.
Flutter Bolt stopped the ball with his chest and kicked it towards Spitfire, who was flanked by Fleetfoot and Lighthoof while Blaze flew above her.
Shining Armor bit his lips while his horn lit, making a purple shield appear in front of him. While the rules didn’t allow the unicorns to make barriers over entire goal, he was allowed to use shields with one meter height and width.
Two earth ponies moved to left and right side of the goal while Shining stood in the middle, waiting for the incoming attack.
Spitfire smirked as she bounced the ball on her head before passing it to Lighthoof, who flew to the left side of the goal. She in turn kicked it to Blaze who was in the center.
With one solid kick, he sent the ball flying straight to the goal, but the projectile was reflected by Shining’s shield.
The ball landed on the ground near the goal, as if a trophy waiting to be picked up. The guards looked at Blaze but didn’t dare to move from their posts.
Shining picked the ball with his levitation, but it didn’t last in his hold longer than few seconds as Fleetfoot flew from the right and kicked it to the goal.
The earth pony guard held his ground as he grabbed the projectile between his rear hooves while standing on his forelegs, only for Lighthoof to fly over and kick it directly to the goal.
Shining jumped to the side while relocating his shield to repel the projectile in last second while a drop of sweat formed on his forehead. The rules were simple. Speed versus strength and defense, and the side who makes first mistake loses.
The pegasus and another earth pony returned to assist their captain as four stallions blocked any attempt of the Wonderbolts to score, but not even for a moment they managed to hold the ball in place before agile and quick elite fliers could get it back.
As the four minutes passed, leaving only one minute before the end of the match, Shining Armor noticed something strange. Spitfire was missing. His ears perked upward as a noise of falling bomb captured his attention.
The captain of the guards trained hard in defensive magic, often repealing projectiles during a training drill, from weak to powerful. Only his steeled nerves and experience let him keep a cold blood as his wide eyes tracked the Wonderbolts’ Captain flying towards the goal at increaseing speed. In an instant, he reinforced his shield and steeled his hooves as Blaze passed the ball to Spitfire.
The time seemed to slow down as Spitfire kicked the ball, causing it to circle a bit as it dashed towards the goal at alarming speed, leaving a trail of fire and smoke behind it. Ever since the strength of the earth pony guards proved too high, a replacement was magically enhanced to withstand even strongest hits. In this case it endured the iron-melting temperature as Shining and his support started to sweat, feeling the heat from the distance.
The pegasus guard flew ahead to intercept the projectile, using his trained strength, only to yell in pain and fall to the ground while a burning mark was left on his leg. An Earth Pony jumped ahead, trying to bodyslam it with his mass, earning burning marks on his belly as the result.
Shining Armor reinforced his shield further, his teeth greet and eyes half closed. His shield cracked slightly upon the impact with the stallion and was pushed right at him, pressing the captain into the goal.
After shaking his head, the Captain of the Guards opened his eyes and examined the situation. His shield seemed to have a few cracks, but didn’t break while the earth pony guard who sacrificed himself in this game now lied unconscious. His strength overpowered by a Wonderbolt's speed while his armor was melting from the growing heat.
Shining Armor dispelled the magical shield and focused as his levitation separated the burning projectile from his brave soldier. “You endured more than that, you will be alright sergeant Iron Head,” he said before looking at the ground, quickly noticing trails left by his own hooves. Shining closed his eyes and thought, So my magic endured the attack, but not my strength. No wonder my little sis always work so hard. Had she been in my position while at her full size, she would have stopped the flaming projectile.
“He’s not hurt, is he?” Spitfire asked as she landed in front of Shining Armor, now focused on the melted neck protection and burning mark on the stallion's belly.
“He will be fine,” Shining responded as he looked around. “It seems the match is over, who won?”
“It was a draw,” Spitfire responded while breathing heavily. Her wings dropped and legs trembled while trails of smoke were visible on her mane.
Shining’s eyes opened widely. “Draw… does that mean… Your team didn’t scored to the aerial goal?” Noticing shake on Spitfire’s head, he asked, “But despite my team’s defenses. Your team could score aerial goal much easier thanks to your natural advantage. Why go all the efforts to break my defenses on the ground where I had the advantage?”
Spitfire raised her muzzle proudly and puffed her chest. “And where’s challenge in that?” She rubbed her chest with a hoof as she added in relaxed tone, “Besides, I wanted to see the look on your face after I would beat you in your own game.” Shining’s mouth was still opened agape, which caused a chuckle among the Wonderbolts. “Totally worth it.”
Shining closed his eyes as he thought, Beaten in my own game. It seems I underestimated the Wonderbolts once again.
“It was a good match,” Spitfire said, capturing Shining’s attention who opened his eyes, and noticed a stretched forehoof. “Seems not all the guards are pushovers after all.”
Shining smiled as he understood the gesture. He shook Spitfire’s forehoof as they both stared at each others with respect. “And it seems that not all the Wonderbolts lack discipline.”
The guards and Wonderbolts quickly followed their leader’s examples while the crowd cheered in enthusiasm.
"Excuse me!” shouted a weak voice as both captains looked down to it’s source. “I saw what happened. Are you hurt, Shiny?”
Shining Armor knelt to his little sister and shook his head before pointing at the unconscious guard. “I’m fine, but I can’t say the same about my subordinate.”
Twilight stood on her rear hooves and saluted before running towards the wounded.
Shining Armor rubbed his chin as he noticed that his sister’s fur seemed a bit wet while her steps she took were shaky. He looked up at Spike who just now approached the group while his attention focused on Spike’s hand as the young drake was massaging it.
“You don’t want to know,” Spike responded.
The guard’s captain stood back to his hooves and nodded before turning to Spitfire. With a relaxed smile, he offered, “How about we take a shower. I sure need one after you struck me with a flaming hoofball.”
“Sounds good.”
As both captains and their teams walked towards the exit while guards and elite pegasi with bruises to heal stayed with Twilight, Shining turned his head to Spitfire and said, “That trick of yours was really impressive." He asked, "How did you even do that?”
Spitfire passed Shining Armor while her tail pat his head and slid over his muzzle. “I am not called Spit-fire for nothing.”
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So shiny calls in the ELITE of the ELITES because he didn't want to have to face the music and calls of hypocracy when nearly everyone was calling the Wonderbolts incompetant and weak. There is no 'sad' in that, it's pathetic! Eh, what else can you expect from Shiny?
Why is Twilight Sparkle shrinking a thing?
See, though it's not 'forcing' love on them, per se, it's still basically the equivalent of just getting them really drunk. Coupled with actually getting them drunk, there's no real 'love' there, and what little there is can be chalked up to having made some really bad decisions while drunk.
Cadance is way more likely to actually drive them apart by pulling this shit than she is to help them get together. She engineered a one-night stand, and instead of bringing them closer together, that's likely to make things incredibly awkward and make a rift between them.
Not only that, but the ethical issues would be even worse in that regard. Just about every military and paramilitary organization has fraternization rules, which means that she's also possibly lost them their jobs.
In summary, by pulling this shit on them, Cadance has 1. Done a good deal to prevent them from getting together, 2. Probably done some serious damage to their friendship and 3. Possibly just cost them both their jobs.
Wow. Not bad for a mind-rape-induced one night stand.
5458538
Well, he does feel guilty about saying all those mean words about the Wonderbolts after finding out how wrong he was. I suppouse he is just desperate to safe his face. Also, as a prideful captain, he want to show that not all guards are in poor shape.
5458623
What do you mean?
5459003
Okay, this comment is have tons of negativity in it.
First off, Cadence didn't brainwash them or anything. She just awaked their good memories and reduced the tension between them. All she did was make them more open to each others about their feelings. The words they spoke weren't forced. They were honest, but Soarin' was afraid to tell them aloud and Spitfire didn't didn't had her reasons that will be explained in futher chapters.
Second, Cadence didn't know that Soarin' never drink before, and she didn't predict that Spitfire don't restrain herself when it comes to hard cider.
Getting Soarin' and Spitfire into bed so quickly wasn't part of the plan.
Excuse me, but do Spitfire and Soarin' are in their jobs 24/24? Do they really cannot have their private lives besides their job?
Who is going to kick them? Spitfire, oh wait, she is the Captain of the Wonderbolts. Celestia? I don't think she would mind something like this, especially if her niece played major role in this incident in the first place. At best she would tell Cadence that she should not involve hard cider in such plans.
How do you know that?
Once again, how do you know that?
3. Possibly just cost them both their jobs.
And who will kick them out?
Sorry, but this is not a story about some sort of scandal with everyone pointing their hooves and yelling how horrible it is that a boss slept with a subordinate. You are making it sounds far worse than it actually is.
This is something I can agree with you here, but it is not the end of the world.
5458623 ... Read the story this is an interquel for?
5459279
I mean that there are a bunch of fics featuring mini-Twilight, and I want to know why that is something people decided they needed several different stories about.
5459279 Well, considering that, in a real-world setting, it would actually be ILLEGAL, there would be several issues there, both professional and moral.
And you explicitly stated that her magic 1. Made them think a certain way and 2. Made them uninhibited.
Couple that with the awkwardness, and you have two people who are convinced that what just happened was a really bad idea.
Also, you're saying that nobody's going to get in trouble because Spitfire's in charge- are you really saying that she's the type of pony to say 'I'm more important than everyone else, so the rules don't apply to me'?
And if she is, do we really think that the rest of the wonderbolts, who if you'll recall just tried to pull a coup, would put up with that kind of attitude from her?
5459532 5459279 Okay, ignoring the bad grammar throughout your comments, I'm going to try to reasonably explain what La Barata is saying to you.
Cadence using her
mind rape'love spells' to get Soarin' and Spitfire is ethically wrong. Even if she's 'surfacing feelings they had for each other,' she's making the two feel a certain way that they normally would not. This is wrong, and there is no way that this could be used for a long-term solution.As the Wonderbolts is a military organization, they would probably have a similar fraternization policy (since the Wonderbolts are essentially Equestria's version of the Blue Angels, I'll use the Navy's as reference). A fraternization policy states that no unprofessional relationships, on- or off-duty, may occur between enlisted members as they promote favoritism, misuse of power, or other unfair actions. Spitfire and Soarin's drunken one-night stand classifies under an unprofessional relationship, and Cadence only makes it worse.
And finally, this:
You realize that even though Spitfire is the head of the Wonderbolts, she still has superiors. Right?
Just trying to explain everything, friend :^)
5459770
I made a blog to discuss this issue. Would you answer on my questions there to help me improve this story.
Link
Also, one thing in your explanation bugs me a lot:
Her spell have similar effect to having two people who are afraid to admit their feelings or hide them, go to therapist for a few sessions where they talk about their issues, make them talk with each other honestly, and also make them talk with each other about all good times they had in the past.
I really don't know how to put it in words so everyone will not right away assume that it is a forced love or mind-rape.
There are some things you may want to edit.
That should be "backs".
That should be a question mark.
You're missing a period.
"bend".
"wouldn't".
I'm pretty sure that should be "before".
After this, it seems that Ace Lottery is supposed to be in front of the aerial goal, and Clashing Strike seems to vanish and be replace by Wave Chill. Also, during this part, Wave Chill is referred to as female, like here:
but is later referred to a male.
I think that should be "attacking against the aerial goal.".
"sent".
"trails".
"trails" and "were".
"pegasus".
"Really".
I think it would be better to have "I am".
"before".
Not a valid transition/Not a method of creating a sentence with multiple verb phrases
'With' is wrong and you might want to change the 'would' and all around tense of the sentence (He would be thinking in past tense anyways).
Suggestion: Had she been in my position while at her full size, she would have stopped the flaming projectile.
Banners usually say "Congratulations"
Wrong preposition and all around awkward sentence flow around it. (And while I doubt the character would notice, it is most definitely not literally.)
Blog
5460049
*Raises hand for a high five for his coincidental editor buddy*
5460679
* High Fives *
5460049
5460675
I am currently working on improving the party scene.
I will add your editing info alongside with the changed scene.
Also, thanks for pointing out all those mistakes. It really help a lot.
5459423 Right now there four 'Tiny Twilight' fics, three of the from the same author and one is a Recursive Fanfiction by another author in the same universe.
5462989
In the show, most of pegasi guards were always white while unicorn guards were grey (there were some rare exceptions), but we almost never saw earth pony guards.
I decided that earth pony guards will have enhancement that make them bronze.
Plenty of grammar issues, but most of them are just "English is weird". My favourite is:
That isn't actually valid, and thus automatically reads as the nearest valid equivalent: "of course I'm stupid"... which is a little self-deprecating in the situation!
For contractions like "I'm" (including I've, I'd, I'll, we're, etc.) you need to follow it with the subject of the "to be" verb. So "of course I'm proud, stupid" works just fine. But you can use the non-contracted version: "of course I am, stupid". It's because of where the emphasis is: the contraction implies that the "being" is not important: "I am proud" contracts to "I'm proud" because the important part is the pride. But without the word "proud", the word "am" is the important part, so you can't contract it.
Other than that, pretty much all of the mistakes are missing filler words like "the", incorrect prepositions (e.g. "standing of his forelegs") and incorrect verb forms (e.g. "what's the worse that could happen").
5463042 Wait! So does tat mean that they did what I think they did or is my brain just swimming in sewage again?
5459426
well then it's a good thing that this is a story about the magic world of equestria in a story where the author can write whatever s/he pleases! tbh if anything Cadence is just speeding up the clock till they become a thing, whether this is more for her sake or theirs is up to debate
Ok let's do a REAL chapter this time.
Oh and hello other viewer, let's read this chapter TOGETHA!!!
I don't know if I want to know how the author of that informational anatomy book knows this information...
META!!!
Unless you warn everyone before the match that you might use a healing spell that only has a VERY dim flash and heals ponies in one second, even when the ponies are in action.
Put that 'ask' into 'asked' please
It's her dream to be crushed, isn't it?
I don't think any of us likes this.
Twilight, you did this.
Uuh, until Season 2 Episode 10 on your birthday. Then you grow into a giant, greedy dragon and steal a bunch of people's stuff.
Shiny, I think you're screwed
I think I need to watch this movie..
If shirt collars or shirt ties are canon, or if Shining is wearing one. Then that's how this scene would be even more intense
N-not like that, I swear. I meant in a threatening "Don't you dare go after her or you gon' be in BIG trouble" kind of way
Leave it to Cadence to scare the crap out of Shiny
Not good?
Flutter Bolt is the kid who played with Twi like a doll during the fight, isn't he?
(Aw yeah, listening to 8-bit remixes of Touhou music, woooot)
(A wizerd, herry. Yer a wizerd.)
GUYS WE GOT A BROKEN BALL, AND A DAMAGED STADIUM OH SHNAP!!!
BEST GAME IN YEARS ACCORDING TO TIA!!
FFf
Ok Shiny, you impressed her.
Shiny, don't assume that
Cadence, back off..
So yeah, I somehow managed to create a HUGE react on a sport chapter, even though im not all that sporty.
Mk then, i'll see you next react. If I can stay awake long enough to finish another..
I forgot to check...
proved too high, a replacement
hurt, Shiny
slid