Anon was a huge dick in this chapter. Celestia was grief stricken. People say thinks they don't mean and Anon should know that. He is a trained soldier. And then the dick move number one: Saying in her face she killed her mother moments after it happens. That was, wow. I questioned if you ever loved for a moment. Yes, sometime couples fight, but that was so low, no one would do it at that moment. That was like kicking a baby. Ever heard the saying: Love endures? Love is what let people forgive the other one after the broke their trust (with cheating or something else). The one cheated upon endures because he loves the other so much. You do anything for your loved ones. When Tia called Anon a monster he should have endured. Yes, he also should be a bit angry of course and feel hurt, but endure it for the one he loved. She just had fucking lost her mother. And the biggest mistake was that she apologized in a big way and not him.
Suicidal Celestia... That made me genuinely sad for a moment which is unusual for me... Maybe it had to do with the fact that there wasn't a several paragraph long self-pity scene...
I'm not some macho tough guy but I can't properly feel my emotions properly and making me feel sad is an accomplishment so congratulations to you good sir.
i just had a thought. If they somehow give anon immortality to last until the end of discords reign, maybe he could help them wield the elements of harmony. 2 elements each
4569941 Most of Discords tricks affected the environment which would hit him. If you can't throw someone against a wall just throw the wall against someone.
4571425 Had a dream like that once, Good Ol' Dissy brought a 5-year old to Equestria and ended up becoming his legal guardian when he couldn't send him back. Well, actually he could, but when he looked through the world to find out where the kid lived, he found out the kid's parents had been killed in a car crash and the kid himself was presumed to have been killed as well.
4571466 Yeah. It was kinda funny when there weren't sad parts, cause the kid kept hiding in Discord's fur, which was seemingly endless and softer than anything in the multiverse, as the Chaos Spirit smugly proclaimed...
4574218 You should've seen when he was introduced to the Sisters. He thought he was gonna die, so he tried to hide in Dissy's fur, only to end up stuck halfway so it looked like he was mooning them...
4574295 And when Lulupop introduced the kid to video-games... well, let's just say thanks to Discord, he now thinks people become zombies because they try to eat TVs...
You trudge your way to the bathroom and take a quick shower. No time for breakfast, you took took too much time in the shower. You half trot, half run to the the tallest tower. You probably should have flown, but you don't want to mess up your mane. When you get to the top of the tower, Anon, your father, and your mother are there.
I only have one gripe here. In about 5 minutes, there's a problem, it's gathered and then fixed. I don't like that, it felt as if you were just throwing emotions, rather than story at me and trying to coax me into crying without being analytic of the writing, in or itself. Still...the premise here is extremely interesting. Also, DISCORD!!!
I really want to favourite this story, I do enjoy it, but after reading what's up here there are a few too many problems with it to give it anything other than a thumbs up and keep it on my read later list.
First of all problems and plot points are created and swept under the rug in a single chapter a lot of the time, they're never explored in any great depth and makes the story seem shallow. This is my biggest gripe.
Second of all the time things which name I have forgotten, time skip or something, you know what I mean... Ahem, those are too long, so many important things could happen during those time things, it makes me think you wanted to skip to Anon being an adult, but then I wonder why you would start with him as a 10 year old in the first place.
My last gripe is that some things just don't really make sense, this doesn't bother me too much because it's only things such as the fact that a person who arrived here as a 10 year old has enough knowledge of a world he no longer lives in to reform completely the training of the Royal Guard.
Despite all of those things, I STILL like this story, I like the character interaction etc. etc. so this comment isn't entirely negative, I like it enough to give it a thumbs up which is the most important thing for a prospective reader. Now that he's older though, can we lay off on the time things and try to explore more of the plot points you create? If you do then you'll really have a solid story, and the earlier chapters will always be available for edits and re-writes if you want to.
I'm really sorry for leaving a harsh comment, I feel really guilty now. Anyway I am looking forward to what you put up next!
Here comes Discord
are they ever going to explain what to their parents on the show.
Well Discord took control for a thousand years, so…yeah Anon is death, maybe his first target since magic don't affect him
4568526 Never. At least, not from Hasbro.
Leave it to a pink cloud to spoil the moment, lol.
Oh I can feel it, it's a shitstorm.
Shit is about to go DOWNNNNNNN
Anon was a huge dick in this chapter. Celestia was grief stricken. People say thinks they don't mean and Anon should know that. He is a trained soldier. And then the dick move number one: Saying in her face she killed her mother moments after it happens. That was, wow. I questioned if you ever loved for a moment. Yes, sometime couples fight, but that was so low, no one would do it at that moment. That was like kicking a baby.
Ever heard the saying: Love endures?
Love is what let people forgive the other one after the broke their trust (with cheating or something else). The one cheated upon endures because he loves the other so much. You do anything for your loved ones. When Tia called Anon a monster he should have endured. Yes, he also should be a bit angry of course and feel hurt, but endure it for the one he loved. She just had fucking lost her mother. And the biggest mistake was that she apologized in a big way and not him.
For someone like Anon, using your weakest moment, that just happened a minute ago, against you the Internet has a picture for:
carboncostume.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/scumbagsteve.jpg
I want to bitch about the conflict resolution between Anon and Celestia.
I want to...... I won't....but I want to.
Suicidal Celestia... That made me genuinely sad for a moment which is unusual for me... Maybe it had to do with the fact that there wasn't a several paragraph long self-pity scene...
I'm not some macho tough guy but I can't properly feel my emotions properly and making me feel sad is an accomplishment so congratulations to you good sir.
i just had a thought. If they somehow give anon immortality to last until the end of discords reign, maybe he could help them wield the elements of harmony. 2 elements each
4568831
trained compared to what? definatly not any earth human thats for sure!
I am genuinely surprised by how much I enjoyed this story. Keep up the great work!
Next chapter enter discord.
Hm....that was reconciled too quickly, IMO.
4568606
How is Anon Death?
4569665
He is immune to magic? could spoil Discord fun? He will stand against him and Discord can't do anything to him?
He is a treat
4569941 Most of Discords tricks affected the environment which would hit him. If you can't throw someone against a wall just throw the wall against someone.
4570001
And now you see why I say he is doom?
You know, when I started reading this story, a part of me actually expected Anon to become Discord...
4570052 That would be a shocker!
4570552 To some, maybe.
4570756 Really would be
4570915 Alright. But I've thought up a few scenarios with my friends that involve a human becoming the Spirit of Chaos.
4571040 Would be interesting if it was Discord that brought Anon to Equestria by accident
4571425 Had a dream like that once, Good Ol' Dissy brought a 5-year old to Equestria and ended up becoming his legal guardian when he couldn't send him back. Well, actually he could, but when he looked through the world to find out where the kid lived, he found out the kid's parents had been killed in a car crash and the kid himself was presumed to have been killed as well.
4571455 Sounds interesting
4571466 Yeah. It was kinda funny when there weren't sad parts, cause the kid kept hiding in Discord's fur, which was seemingly endless and softer than anything in the multiverse, as the Chaos Spirit smugly proclaimed...
4571473
4571525 Yeah, it was funny.
4571551 adorable too :)
4573410 It's also adorable when the kid falls asleep in Dissy's fur and starts sucking on his lion paw's thumb like a pacifier.
4574132 d'awww
4574218 You should've seen when he was introduced to the Sisters. He thought he was gonna die, so he tried to hide in Dissy's fur, only to end up stuck halfway so it looked like he was mooning them...
4574262
4574295 And when Lulupop introduced the kid to video-games... well, let's just say thanks to Discord, he now thinks people become zombies because they try to eat TVs...
4574309
4574368 Yeah, Dissy's explanations are weird.
4574381 We should stop spamming the author
4574384 Okay. Sorry Kerberos, please forgive us.
I loved it, I love it all! Quick question, do you have an ETA of when Chapter 7 might come out? I dont really mean to bother.
And here comes Discord
heres discord, let the trolling begin!!!
You wrote took twice
4574309 :insertlaughingdashieemojihere:
4569941 Discord controls chaos, not magic
4703391
chaos magic, remember the Tirek ep
I only have one gripe here.
In about 5 minutes, there's a problem, it's gathered and then fixed.
I don't like that, it felt as if you were just throwing emotions, rather than story at me and trying to coax me into crying without being analytic of the writing, in or itself.
Still...the premise here is extremely interesting.
Also, DISCORD!!!
I really want to favourite this story, I do enjoy it, but after reading what's up here there are a few too many problems with it to give it anything other than a thumbs up and keep it on my read later list.
First of all problems and plot points are created and swept under the rug in a single chapter a lot of the time, they're never explored in any great depth and makes the story seem shallow. This is my biggest gripe.
Second of all the time things which name I have forgotten, time skip or something, you know what I mean... Ahem, those are too long, so many important things could happen during those time things, it makes me think you wanted to skip to Anon being an adult, but then I wonder why you would start with him as a 10 year old in the first place.
My last gripe is that some things just don't really make sense, this doesn't bother me too much because it's only things such as the fact that a person who arrived here as a 10 year old has enough knowledge of a world he no longer lives in to reform completely the training of the Royal Guard.
Despite all of those things, I STILL like this story, I like the character interaction etc. etc. so this comment isn't entirely negative, I like it enough to give it a thumbs up which is the most important thing for a prospective reader. Now that he's older though, can we lay off on the time things and try to explore more of the plot points you create? If you do then you'll really have a solid story, and the earlier chapters will always be available for edits and re-writes if you want to.
I'm really sorry for leaving a harsh comment, I feel really guilty now. Anyway I am looking forward to what you put up next!
hello
i know you're online
eta on next chappy?
4810399 When I feel the inspiration hit me again. I am just going to write another story to get me back into the game.