• Published 17th Feb 2014
  • 35,184 Views, 1,840 Comments

Headless, not Heartless - Thadius0



Most people wouldn't think dressing up as an optional boss would land them in Equestria. Most people would be right. Most people aren't me. Most people still have their bloody head!

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Chapter 14 - Don't lose your head

Being me comes with a variety of perks.

Some I use often, like my access to nearly all psynergy.

Still haven't figured out Alex's warping bullshit he did...

Some I rarely use, like my sword's...interesting physical properties.

Limitless understanding is not to be taken lightly. If I could, I'd gouge out my 'inner eye' or whatever the hell others call it.

Some come as easily to me as breathing used to, like actually moving so long as I have my sword.

Near as I can figure, so long as it's in my scabbard or grasp, that's close enough. It seems to take in the ambient magic of the place and use it to animate the armor in accordance with my wishes.

And then there's those things which I save for...special occasions.

If my armor is hit with enough force that it becomes punctured or deformed, then I lose all 'feeling' in that particular limb until the metal knits itself back together.

Takes a bit. Minor things take 15 minutes, while major things can take hours.

However, if I were to, say, relax, and willingly pull off my left hand with my right?

I would have my own little Thing that I could still feel and control.

I only recall using this ability once before now, and that was to switch the royal crowns around.

Gave Sunbutt and Moonbutt such a scare.

I say 'before now' because my plan to get me into the crystal empire unnoticed was...uncomfortable.

In fact, it was eerily similar to being drawn and quartered, except instead of horses doing it, it was ponies pulling me to pieces.

And then stuffing those pieces in quite a few crates.

Interestingly enough, while I could still 'feel' all the pieces of me, my awareness was located in the upper torso.

As was Dullahan's, but he recognized the awkwardness of the situation and refrained from speaking up.

This was something I had never done to this extent before, nor did I ever want to do it to this extent ever again.

It just feels like all sorts of wrong.

Amber, ShiverSpine, Silver Cross, and Crystal Clear were the ones I had asked to come with me, for various reasons.

There was a bit of excitement when we neared the Ponyville Train Station, as it turns out there were guards scanning for changelings.

Damn good thing we didn't bring any with us, it'd have meant so much trouble on our part.

They did, of course, question as to why a dragon, a diamond dog, and two ponies were bringing as many crates to the Crystal Empire as they were.

Crystal brought up that it was for her research, and that the rest were there for security purposes.

Technically not a lie.

And thankfully, none of them thought to try and keep me entertained while on the trip north.

Clearly, they must have recognized the awkwardness of the situation as well.

It took us days. Long, boring days. Before we would reach our destination.

I was seriously considering singing at one point.

Eventually, we arrived, and I could not have been happier.

The plan from this point on was simple. Sneak into the castle and get reassembled.

It didn't take long before Amber pulled open the crate containing the chestplate.

Air! Fresh air!

She pulled me out and frowned. "You don't breathe."

Doesn't mean it's any less appreciated! Pull the rest of my parts out, I wanna get this over with!

She placed me on the floor, and I could see the others prying open the crates and fishing the parts of me out.

Eventually all the parts of me were out of the crates and on the ground. I immediately tensed up, or as close to it as I could do.

The parts of my armor slowly rotated around, coming into the proper alignment. The smallest piece flew and connected in its proper spot, and then it all cascaded from there.

My quick reassembly was not without its noise, however, and quite soon we'd drawn a crowd of guards.

I rolled my joints around, relishing in the feeling of being able to move again. Aaah, it's good to be back.

I then 'looked' at the ring of crystal guards surrounding me, Amber, Silver, Shiver, and Crystal Clear. I would have grinned. Oh, this is too perfect.

I made the sounds one normally would associate with clearing the throat and held a hand up. I...am Dullahan. I come...in peace. Take us...to your leader!

-----

Of course, I ended up staring down that same pink alicorn that I had briefly met at the wedding.

The others were behind me, and the guards were behind them. And that same unicorn stallion was standing next to the alicorn.

Neither one looked pleased at me.

You know, I get the distinct impression you two don't like me.

The stallion snorted. "Let's review. You mess with Ponyville, taunt my sister and her friends, attempt to gatecrash my wedding, and sneak into the palace. You also made my guards look like chumps, what with civilians on your side repelling the changelings easily. Frankly, I'm wondering why I don't just stick you in a shield and call it a day."

The pink alicorn put a hoof on the stallion's shoulder. "Shining, Auntie Celestia did say she had rushed to judge him previously. I think we should at least give him a chance to speak in his own defense."

I laughed then. Oh bravo for learning from her mistakes! At least someone did!

At this, the duo cast a sour look at me. "Then again..."

I held up a hand. My bad. I'm not used to not antagonizing ponies quite yet. I'm getting better about it.

Slowly, the looks softened. Let's try again, shall we? I'm Dullahan, and I have a proposition for you. Might I inquire as to your names, where that absolute prick Sombra is, and how you're keeping the weather at bay?

The alicorn nodded. "In order, I am Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, this is Shining Armor, my husband, and the last two are related. Twilight Sparkle and Spike located the Crystal Heart, which when placed in position and filled with the light and love of the crystal ponies, generates a shield around the city and banishes evil."

I did my nodding motion at her. Yeah, if there was one thing that guy was, it was evil. I had the displeasure of meeting him once. You recall that lightning bolt trick I do? Yeah, he was flung out a balcony by that and recovered in time for the sisters to find both him and me. I fled, but he stood his ground.

The two looked at each other, then back at me. "You fought him?"

Briefly. More like sparred. And that was interrupted by the sisters.

I caught the uncertainty flickering across Shining's face and acted on it. I may be a monster. I may have committed crimes. But the vast majority of those crimes was in the service of punishing the wicked. Those few that aren't, when I can, I will repay my debt, within reason, to they I have wronged.

Cadenza smiled. "See Shining? The 'monster' has a heart."

I rapped on my breastplate with one hand, producing a slight echo as empty metal clanged on empty metal. Well. Did, at any rate. More accurately, I have a sense of morality.

That got a slight chuckle out of those behind me, which got a quick laugh out of Cadenza. "So, what is this proposition you have for us, Dullahan?"

I motioned for Amber and ShiverSpine to come and stand by me, and they did so. Put simply, like you said. The Heart banishes evil. Amber, Shiver, are you two, by any stretch of the imagination, evil?

They shook their heads.

And yet, when you look around you at this empire and the ponies within, what do you see?

As their eyes glazed over and their mouths filled with drool, I clapped a few times to break them out of their hunger-induced trances. You see, your highness? They are not evil, yet they still have instincts, desires. Who is to say that when word of the Crystal Empire with its Crystal Ponies gets out to those races that they will not come here?

As she frowned at the thought, I motioned for Silver and Crystal Clear to come stand next to me as well. Crystal Clear can do remarkable things with gemstones, she might be able to make a few guardians out of crystals. Whereas Silver...let us leave it at 'he has experience fighting evil.'

The two next to me nodded at the rulers as they were mentioned, and I continued on. All of us, but most especially myself, command powers unlike any you've like to encounter. We will be willing to help protect you until such time as you can guard yourself from dragons and the like...with three conditions.

Cadenza narrowed her eyes slightly, not liking the sound of that. "Name them."

First, food and housing for these four, within reason.

She nodded, probably expecting a worse condition than that.

Second, supplies for Crystal Clear's experiments, within reason.

She nodded again, clearly liking the last two words I was tacking on to my conditions so far.

And third, I wish to see the Crystal Heart.

At this, Shining and Cadenza shared a Look, before slowly replying. "I...don't see...why not. Guards, escort these four to a guest room in the palace, and escort Dullahan to the base."

-----

There, shining and glimmering and hovering between two spires, was the Crystal Heart.

I could...feel it. It radiated power, and at this close range, I wonder why I hadn't felt it before.

I drew closer, and the guards nearby tensed up, probably getting ready to react if I did something.

I could hear something whispering to me.

You came...

I reached out with one hand, and a guard barked at me. "That's close enough, headless one. You said you wanted to look, not touch."

I scoffed at him. If I were really evil, I wouldn't have been able to enter or get this close. If I really wanted to do harm to this artifact, it would be powder by now. I just want to understand it.

As the rest of the guards chewed on the information, my hand chose that moment to accelerate and touch the Heart.

And suddenly, all was whiteness and pain.

-----

You came to me...

I am the ultimate expression of the earth's strength, for lo! I protect an entire empire! I bring life and growth to the barren tundra!

I am the counterpart to your Venus Star.

But YOU may not unleash its strength.

Each Star has a champion, and three such champions are with you now.

For Jupiter, the Dragon. He must soar to Cloudsdale and tour the Weather Factory. He will know when to bring out the Star.

For Mars, the Unicorn. He must go to the location of the Great Dragon Migration, and find the ever-burning heart of the mountain.

For Venus, myself, the Diamond Dog.

And for Mercury...

You know her as well, though you met only briefly.

Seek her in the Badlands, restore water and life to the cracked desert.

-----

When I came to, I was surrounded by a ring of guards who had leveled their spears at me. Beyond them, I could make out Cadenza and Shining, along with the ones who had come with me. Thinking quickly, I softly spoke the passphrase and brought out the Venus Star.

Amber, catch!

I tossed it over the heads of the guards, and the alicorn and her husband only watched as Amber caught the shining brown sphere. Then, as if by some unseen guidance, she turned towards the heart and held out the paw where the sphere was.

And then the Star shattered.

In the silence that followed, I thought one thing. Namely, the thought of 'wha-'

Which was cut off as Amber glowed brown and thick streams of brown light cascaded off her and impacted the Heart.

The Heart took that light and shot it upwards, and everyone present raced out from underneath the palace.

Well, everyone but me. It would have been rude to Amber to leave her.

"Look at that!"

"What IS it?"

"It's some sort of huge green sphere of light!"

"What's it doing above the palace?"

"Are we under attack?"

"Run for your lives!"

The stream of light faded from Amber, and I caught her as she fell. "What...was that?"

My dear, you just channeled the power of a Star through yourself. Take it easy. You need to rest.

And then I grimaced as Dullahan spoke to me. ...So this is why He is coming...

Yes, I thought back, This would be a reason.

We may not have Lighthouses, but we do have places of great elemental strength. Those with a strong enough connection and a Star...

I grimaced as I realized my passphrase could very well become incorrect.

The Golden Sun could shine twice.

Author's Note:

Show a hands, who saw this one coming!