a tale of two couriers

by Vaultdweller101

chapter 1 "In the begining"

As a midnight blue glow enveloped me and Ulysses my gigar counter went nuts. It sounded like a insane clock on jet. It took me a moment to get the hint, I started freaking out then once it slowly started to dissipate I looked at my rad count … 733
“Holy shit it’s never gone that high!” I looked like a crazy person freaking out rifling around my coat for some rad-away. I still had two packs left. I quickly took the yellowish packs and injected them into myself, noticing the radiation draining from the gigar counter dramatically on my Pipboy.
“Great,” I sighed, “still at five hundred.” I could taste the metallic taste of blood in my mouth. Aside from the general queasiness from radiation poisoning, my head was spinning from just how a horse could generate so much radiation without killing itself.
“Well?” the dark blue equine asked, apparently oblivious to the fact it nearly killed us with radiation.
Ulysses remained silent and simply stared at the horse, quite unnervingly too.
“Identify yourselves!” demanded the dark blue equine as we stood there in silence. “Who are you and who are you working for?”
“Names are irr-“
“Hi you can call me the Courier,” I said cutting off Ulysses mid-sentence.
“I am Princess Luna,” the horse, now dubbed Luna, replied.
I took off my helmet to reveal my brown and blue eyes to get a better look at the “Princess” myself. It was then that I noticed the somewhat intense staring match between her and Ulysses.
“He’s Ulysses, he doesn’t talk that much…”
We all stood there silently for a while me well I was contemplating how to get back home, or how we got to the land of insanity in the first place. I wasn’t sure of what Ulysses was thinking about and to be honest I’m kind of glad that I didn’t. My stomach was rumbling lowly as I attempted in vain to dust of my old, lucky duster. By that point however, it was probably made more out of dust than anything though.
“Perhaps it would be best if you joined us in the dining hall,” Luna finally said, “It would be wise for you to be introduced to my sister…”
I looked from Ulysses and then back to the Princess before replying, “So after all this, we’re just going to go eat food? No traps, killing or package delivering?”
My questions were left unanswered as Luna strut down the hall, expecting the two of us to follow.
***
I walked slightly ahead and threw the doors open, only to be greeted by spears at my throat. I instinctively reached for my laser RCW and pointed it at the nearest guard. It only occurred seconds afterwards that I had done it subconsciously. I quickly holstered the weapon, as did the guards when they saw Luna behind me.
When I sat down at the dining table and took a look at my plate, I saw just dead grass and an apple. I pushed it slightly away and made use of my pip-boys storage function. [The storage function works by storing real world objects as computer data.] I went to the AID folder and went under the food subsection and pulled out a Brahmin steak and some fixer to sober myself up. As the items appeared in front of me most of the other multicoloured horses had their mouths agape. Though that easily could have been from the fact they had never seen a human before either, it was hard to tell.
The white, rainbow maned, unicorn pegasus thing cleared her throat before she began to speak “So … Courier was it?” she asked hesitantly. I simply nodded in response.
“Courier is more of a job then a name is it not?” She asked. I casually stood up and walked over to her I was only slightly taller than her. “Isn’t it the polite thing to offer your name instead of questioning that of the other?” I asked trying to keep a shred of patience in the land of talking horses.
Ulysses, who had yes to sit, stood a few feet behind me. Whether or not he was going to act as chaperone to bring me back to my seat was irrelevant. I just stood there and had a stare off with the white horse.
“My name is Celestia,” she began, “Princess of Equestria and elder sister of Princess Luna.”
After a few brief seconds of civility, I replied, “Only common courtesy to return the favor. My proper name is … Liam.” Ulysses simply stood in the background, continuing to watch the little event unfold. Though I imagine he was quite intrigued by everything going on.
“Now,” I said slowly, “there are very few people who know my name, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t address me by it unless I say so. The last person who called me by my proper name was taken by the Legion.”
With a very serious tone in my voice that even I didn’t notice at the time, I continued, “I grew up in a place called Vault 21. Like the other Vaults, it was meant as a safe haven for the Great War turned nuclear. From there our race, humanity, would survive. When House took control of the surrounding city, we were free to leave and take jobs around the wasteland as we saw fit. From then on, I was Courier Six.”
In the background, I could hear the raspy tone of Ulysses whisper something about the couriers, though I couldn’t really understand him with my focus on Celestia.
“Well I can imagine that you are much more relaxed now that you are here in in the protected lands of Equestria” Luna said, putting emphasis on “protected”.
I walked back to my seat and sat down. Seeing as how I’d be quite the while before I could actually go back home, I decided to try and keep a conversation going.
“So now that I’ve told you a bit about myself, why don’t you tell me about this ‘Equestria’?”
Celestia’s demeanour visibly brightened up when she noticed my curiosity and answered, “Of course, what would you like to know?”
“Just a couple things…” I began while sitting in a position to address both her and Luna, “For starters, is there a place that I can maintain my weapons? Secondly, is there I scientist that I can talk with to discuss traveling back to my home? Thirdly, and kind of important at the moment, why does your horn flash thing generate enough radiation to nearly ghoulify me?”
At this point the rest of the guests had left the only people, or ponies as I had found out, left were me Ulysses the guards and the princesses.
“Your weapons will be looked after in the Royal Vaults,” Luna replied.
“As for scientists, I shall arrange for a team of them to be flown in tomorrow to discuss this situation,” Celestia added, “Though I’m not sure what you meant by your third question.
“That’s fair, I suppose,” I said as I lit a cigarette.
We talked for a while longer, Ulysses occasionally muttering in his seat. Celestia and Luna animatedly spoke of their Kingdom, Equestria. No violence, mutation or radiation. Well there was plenty radiation generated from the “magic” they claimed to use, but I had seen similar tricks performed at the Big Empty. Aside from “magic” however, there was no background radiation to be seen. After what seemed like an hour of idle chatter and eating, the Princesses rose from their seats.
“Let us show you to your bed chambers, it is getting quite late after all,” Celestia announced.
As I followed Luna and her guards to our new rooms, I seriously began to reflect on what the Princesses had told us about Equestria. Could it actually be true? A world without violence of bloodshed? A nation rampant with harmony and friendship? A place with peace amongst men, err, stallions? Could we have actually made it there?
GOD FUCKING DAMMIT KLEIN THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU…
“We’re here,” one of the “Lunar” Guards announced. I didn’t really notice what which door he referred to, as I was deep in thought, so I just walked into the one nearest to me and leapt onto the premade med. I let my thoughts wander and hoped to what God was out there that I was going to wake up in a more reasonable world the following day

Comments

[M-Tails-P]

I grew up in a place called Vault 21

For the love of god, the Courier wasn't born in a goddamned-

Cancelled

files.myopera.com/EspenAO/albums/210294/1justice.png

[M-Tails-P]

3619300

as long as he put heart and soul into it, shouldn't he at least get credit for that!

O Rly? Because to me, it looks like he spent a grand total of 15 minutes on MS Word and didn't even bother to turn on auto correction.

you can either love it, leave, or stomp on it for apparent reason at all!

1. It's "No apparent reason", though apparent reason works too since you can tell this story sucks without reading past the title.
2. There's this thing called "Constructive criticism", it helps an author become better at writing. It's not "stomping on it for no reason" if it's legitimate flaws that we're pointing out.

the point is keep your bloody hate to yourself give the guy a break! it's his first fic!

Again, constructive criticism. If this really is his first fic, then he needs criticism even more than other writers since, as I said, writers need to take criticism in order to become better at writing..

[M-Tails-P]

You know what, I'm just going to break down this story piece by piece to show you what's wrong:

The Courier opened the door to see Ulysses with his back turned, holding onto a laser pistol after losing everything else in the Divide.

OK, first sentence and I'm already confused. Who's holding onto the laser pistol? Was it Ulysses or the Courier? The later sentences confirmed that it was Ulysses, which raises more questions than it answers: He lost everything? Why? When? Where? How? Explain things, author!

Ulysses looked especially infuriated without Red Glare at hand.

What Red Glare? Granted, a Red Glare appears in Lonesome Road's final locker, buy Ulysses never USED a Red Glare himself! What about his signature weapon, Old Glory?

"I’ll give it too you ... you aren’t half bad without a gun,"

Who the hell is this guy? Well, at least we know he's not Ulysses, he would never talk like this.
Maybe Crazy Steve knocked out Ulysses, stole his duster and mask and tied his hair into dreadlocks?
But seriously, one of my favourite things about Ulysses is the way he talks, and now you completely threw that out of the airlock, thanks.
Also, it's TO, not TOO!

"If I know my guns, and trust me I do, you only have one shot left in that revolver and I’ll bet 500 caps it can't get through ranger armour.”

Shut up, Crazy Steve!
What Ranger Armour? Ulysses DOESN'T WEAR FREAKING RANGER ARMOUR! He hates NCR with a passion! Did you forget that he was trying to nuke NCR this whole time because he thinks they're "a tribe of children" who "grow without structure"?
Guh. Less than 3 paragraphs in and I'm already tired now, will probably post more later.