in any kind of adventure story sometimes you want to include a fighting scene, but some writers may not be able to do it. My question really is How do you write out a fight scene because I am in need of help.

2004025

Pace it quickly. Fights are often frenzied in the first place; describing every move in detail gets repetitive really fast. Summarize things; don't say "left punch, blocked, jump spinning crescent kick" etc. Use phrases like "a flurry of blocked punches" (although "flurry" might be a little cliche, but the point stands). Use shorter sentences and appropriately emotive language (a Google search will probably elaborate on this better than I can); longer, more complex language isn't ideal.

2004025 I was going to write something detailed, a tutorial of sorts... but, uh... Chrono_Ryono and Opacare Stellata both... combine those two.

2004025
Depends if it's believable or anime. If it's believable then watch a close boxing match and switch the fighters with ponies

I usually watch anime fight scenes, maybe write out a list of moves that I can see the characters doing.

I'm writing my third fight scene in as many chapters for my story and there is sure to be many more. So I guess this works for me. Everyone's writing style is different though.

Pump yourself up with some fight music if you don't like anime. Rage Against The Machine, Hollywood Undead, bands/artists like these help me out.

Hope this helped.
~InfiniteZero

2004025 This isn't meant to be self promotion but this chapter and the ones that follow it have a lot of action scenes in them. Hopefully it will help. If you are looking for a straight up fight scene I recommend skipping ahead to the laundry room chapter.
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/42657/11/the-triumvirate/riot

2004025 For me, I have to be able to give accurate descriptions as well as keep the pacing of the fight without making it seem like they go mega fast. I would have to recommend a chapter of my own story Tricks, Cloaks and Wands. You just have to go down a bit, but you'll find it just as she enters the warehouse. Link to it is here.

2004025 The overall how is fairly explanatory because the fight flows organically. You have to be aware of not only the environment, but the actions of the characters and their actions around the fighter.

2004025
A tip I always give people when they ask this is to keep the environment in mind when writing the fight and have the characters interact with it. If you're in a house, toss someone over a couch or have them kick over a table to distract their foe. If you're dealing with a couple of pegasi having a dogfight in a cloudy sky, make sure they make ample use of the clouds to hide and try to outflank each other.

When used properly the location can effectively add a third character to the fight and makes things a lot more dynamic and interesting,

2004025 "Don't"s of Fight Scenes:
Don't go all Dragonball Z with your story (unless it's a Dragonball Z story) where the characters are zipping around at supernatural speeds and hitting each other with enough force to shatter mountains.

Don't have your characters announce their attacks (this is particularly true for melee characters; they don't yell things like "Falcon Pawnch" at the top of their voices when attacking, they simply do it).

Don't try to describe every single movement they make, it'll only bog the scene down.

"Do"s of Fight Scenes:

Do describe the fights with the detail equal to the skill of the opponent, like if the character's opponent fights like a chump, then he should go down like a chump (in other words, two or three sentences tops) whereas if the opponent is skilled, you'll want to go into slightly more detail and draw it out.

The rest of the "Do"s are more opposite of the "Don't"s and I'm too lazy to describe them right now.

2004066 various creature attacks such as sword pay, flame throwers, magic, dark powers, guns...

so kinda like anime

2004161
Then watch an anime

2004025 Since your fighting scenes will involve ponies, I would suggest a tiny horse anatomy workshop. Just as a calf muscle and thigh muscle will bunch together before a kick, so, too, will a gaskin and stifle meet at the flank before a buck. Close your eyes and imagine each pony as they move, one by one. A hoof will shove into a barrel - a cracking sound is heard as a rub is sprained. The injured horse will snort and turn to the aggressor. Don't think of a fighting scene as one scene. Each action that one takes against the other is a scene within itself.

It's a little subjective, but I prefer to push the actual fight mechanics into the background. In all of Chapter 3-4 of, Diplomacy by Other Means, I only describe directly the first blow, a tail flick, and there's actually a gap in the story for the last blow because I *can't* describe it without losing a lot of the story impact. Chapter 5 of Genealogy has a longer fight description that works fairly well, particularly after I revised it a lot from the original (which used to have a lot of cartoon sound effects, not good).

2004025

It is important to keep a balance between description and brevity, and most often when you get into detail for pivotal moves in a fight, yoy want to interlace it with the emotions of the character who holds the perspective. For examples of my technique, I would point to Chapter 1 of my story Equestria's Strife Online, and chapters 9 and 10 of my other one, Dragoon Wars. I do my best to follow the policy I described.

2004025
Well first you need to decide what kind of fight it's going to be. A fight between two Unicorns will be far different than a fight between two pegasi; which will be different than a fight between two Earth Ponies; which will be different than a fight between two Alicorns. Even then the fights can vary a great deal depending on the characters in the fights.

Alicorns may use flight as much as their magic in combat; Unicorns will most likely rely on their magic.
Whereas Pegasi and Earth Ponies will have to fight physically, though Pegasi have the advantage of flight.

If you want you can take a look at how I write fights:
Fight1: A short fight
Fight2: A long fight, actually continues to the next chapter.
Major spoilers though...

2004025

This thread may or may not help you.

2004025 You make them as awesome as possible.

Some basic tips:

1. Unless you're trying to show that one character is just that powerful, try not to make the fight one-sided.

2. By the same token, don't do the "One side is winning, but then the other has a miraculous comeback" stuff common in anime such as Yu-Gi-Oh: The Pyramid of Light (yes, I consider that a fight scene). It's more fun if each side keeps losing and regaining the advantage, it keeps the reader guessing.

As for how the prose of actual fighting should go, well, it's one of those things where you can let go of grammar rules for the sake of conveying excitement, Observe (I'm going to use my OCs and a first-draft scene from an upcoming fanfic for this):

"Ha!" Vario [a huge, imposing Diamond Dog who is both the captain of the King's guard and next in line for the throne] laughed. "I never intended for this stupid marriage to go through anyway! It was all a ploy so that I could kill King Dowazer, and pin the blame on ponykind! Then the Diamond Dogs would rally behind me when I take the throne and declare war on Equestria!"

Hving so spoken, Vario swung his mighty axe down on the small, timid figure of King Dowazer, who was saved just in the nick of time by a shove from Surprise. Vario turned then on the little white pony, striking again and again so hard that the floor rumbled. Surprise sidestepped each blow, and finally took a chance to punch the dog in the gut, then made distance while he caught his breath.

With single-minded determination, Vario advanced upon her, already prepared to swing... but just then, one of King Dowazer's pups ran between the two, yelling "Daddy!" This pup near accidentally tripped Vario, who growled with anger and kicked the puppy aside.

This was the worst mistake he could've made. See, the thing with Surprise is if she sees you attack a child, it doesn't matter whether its a human or a pony or a puppy or a kitten.... you do it, you basically asked her to kill you.

When Vario next swung at her, Surprise didn't just dodge it, she darted forward, between Vario's legs and almost instantly bucked him into the air, then ran to his landing place and uppercutted with such perfect precision that his gut met her fist.

She wasn't done, either, following up with a handstand-buck which gave way to a Rising Tackle--that's a technique where she spins around upside-down, fists extended, rising into the air, her hind-hooves taking out whatever is directly above her. Against all laws of physics, she managed to hit the nine-foot-tall Diamond Dog four times, keeping him juggled in the air, until on the fourth blow she knocked him towards a far wall. He didn't even have time to stagger before she was on him again, kicking and punching and ramming into his gut with enough force to crumble a granite statue!

Then she stood on her hind legs, readying her forehooves, and I heard her declare "Power--"

I dashed out and grabbed her forehooves, crying out "Don't! That trick'll bring the whole cave down on us!"

To my great relief, her anger passed. "Oh, you're right. Thanks. Hey, wait... Raydence, when did you get here?"

Hmm.... actually, I wouldn't call that one of my better fight scenes, since it breaks both my guidelines. Still though, the key is emotion. It should be tense, exciting, thrilling. You should feel it even as you write it. You should be able to write flurries of attacks and actually be able to imagine an announcer declaring "Hyper Combo Finish!"

It's all in the heart.

2004025
I have two hard and fast rules about action scenes.
1. Make it about Trixie.
2. Include lots of utterly stupid things to do in a fight, like play theme music, and shoot fireworks.
2a. Profit.

Anyway, there's not really any hard and fast rules. 2004038 points out one school of thought, which is valid. That things are supposed to be hectic and out of control, so use more abrupt language and keep the pacing breakneck. However, that doesn't always suit certain kinds of fights. Especially if the character you're following is someone Twilike an intellectual, who is likely to have a very considered, thoughtful way of going about things. Verses, say, Dash, who will just probably hit you really fast, and you totally should have an insane pace on.

Likewise, if you have really massive, over-the-top fights like you'd see in The Immortal Game or This Platinum Crown, you'll be doing the epicness a disservice by being quick. In that case you want to lovingly detail the flashy literary eye candy. You want the characters trading barbs, and unleashing calculated gambits. With those sorts of fights, it isn't a ten second brawl. It's a half hour of insanity that takes you a chapter and a half to get through.

One thing I will say:
Avoid making things too hectic. Don't split up the focus ten ways in a fight. I've seen even totally amazing authors botch what should have been amazing fights by scattergunning the point of view, and making it impossible to follow what's going on. Cling to one character at a time, and for decent periods of time, as often as you can manage.

2004966

It's especially dangerous to split up the perspective during a large battle scene. Not a duel, an actual battle. You can't "follow each soldier's progress" and hope to get anything relevant said. >_>

Likewise, if you have really massive, over-the-top fights like you'd see in The Immortal Game or This Platinum Crown,

I really should check out the latter...
(And finish reading the former)

My dream someday is for my own story to find itself in such lists like the one you just made. Y'know, be a household name of sorts. "Dark/action stories can be really epic. The Immortal Game, Whispers, Inner Demons..."

But yeah, my own story's going to have probably one or two "gratuitously over the top" fights in it - you've seen the "draft" form of one of them (Discord vs Array). I usually go DBZ-style for fights like that, and justify it with "hey, Discord was toying with you six; he could have cracked mountains in half if he wanted."

Otherwise it's just normal - albeit tough - ponies fighting. Whispers hasn't really shown how I handle "normal" characters yet, but Moonthistle and Aurora are pretty tough...

2004025

An example, part of a fight scene from my story:

Two more crawled over the railing. I was ready this time, floating up Little Macintosh as I slipped into S.A.T.S. and fired into their heads. The hellhounds' brains splashed out of the exit wounds.

Three more replaced the two I had just killed. And the sound of rending concrete warned me that more were digging directly up through the overpass from the top of the pier.

Velvet Remedy’s anesthetic spell hit one of the hellhounds, causing the creature to fall. She lifted her shotgun towards another. And hesitated.

The hellhound lashed out at her, his claws slashing shallow lines of red across her breast and throat as I telekinetically shoved her back.

“Surrender,” she offered to the creature. “Don’t make me hurt you.”

“Galdangit!” Calamity shouted, firing a bevy of magical energy bolts into the hellhound. The creature collapsed into a steaming puddle, leaving Velvet Remedy and Calamity staring at each other through the rising smoke. “Don’t reason wi’ ‘em! They ain’t interested!”

“They’re people!” She shouted back. “They have a right to live.”

“Y’all heard the zebra!” Calamity shouted, turning to fire at another hellhound as he dug up through the overpass asphalt. “They’re huntin’ us.”

“And whose fault is that?” she quipped back loudly, throwing a protective shield around Xenith. The hellhound’s claws tore through Velvet’s shield like it was made of colored air. The zebra stepped inside the attack, rising on her hindlegs and throwing up one hoof to stop the monster’s swinging arm while driving another hoof against the thick hide of his throat. The hellhound collapsed, choking.

“Has anypony even tried just talking to them?” Velvet cried out in exasperation.

I reloaded Little Macintosh as quickly as I could. They were coming faster now. It was getting harder to put them down as quickly as they surfaced. And one good swipe from their claws would kill any one of us.

My advice:

Smaller sentences read faster and more furious, as do smaller paragraphs. But little details will help bring the scene to life in the reader's mind. So don't be afraid of the occasional long sentence or moderate paragraph when it will add to the scene. Try to keep all senses in mind and use them when appropriate.

Allow the characters to be characters while in the fight rather than just devolving into a set of combat skills. Let their personalities play into the fight.

Make it a fight, not a cakewalk, even if one side is clearly outmatched.

Always keep a mind on the terrain and use that to augment the fight whenever possible. Consider the environment another character, even possibly another combatant, in the battle.

2004025
Actually, I shall quote this bit for emphasis:

2004998

Always keep a mind on the terrain and use that to augment the fight whenever possible. Consider the environment another character, even possibly another combatant, in the battle.

That's something to always consider. Star Wars, especially the newer ones, used that theory quite religiously. Having the fight take place in an interesting, or dangerous, environment can be a huge draw. It can up the tension (By, say, having certain death be always one misstep away) or it can provide you with an excuse to let your readers get a breather, as characters hide, or move behind cover. It can far more plausibly provide you with chances at surprise.

And... hell, c'mon, sometimes it's just cool. There's something inherently badass about two characters dueling while leaping between two airships crashing into eachother. Or as the Canterlot platform that they're fighting on slowly crumbles and drops down the side of the mountain.

2004972
At the very least, go read The Best Night Ever, the prequel to it. It's just both awesome and fun.

For my part, I'm not sure how I'd handle a battle between the gods, like you'd have. My temptation would be to make things increasingly abstract. To make it less about energy blasts, and more about taking reality and twisting. After all, even throwing mountains at Discord would just make him yawn. He can move out of the way at will, or make himself intangible. The fact that he can screw with his own body at will makes me believe physical injury is all but useless. Or just will the damned mountain out of existence.

2005137

Mondai Shunketsu and I actually displayed that difference in mindset. His fight (Discord vs Shades of Grey/Gray Umbra) was pretty much about them throwing "chaotic" attacks at each other (uprooting trees, whipping up sandstorms, etc.) and canceling them with their own mastery of chaos. That's a little too much like a game (in my opinion) for my tastes, but to each their own.

I just like to imagine that Discord's power goes very far beyond what we see him do, and that he could create nuclear explosions and split continents in half if he wanted. Then again, as you'll recall, all he does in my fight is dodge. It's Array who does all the attacking, and none of them are physical.

2005147
Well, in the case of The Immortal Game, I think the fight between Discord and Titan really handles it best (though you haven't gotten there yet, I don't think). It happily happens mostly offscreen. That's probably how I would do it. I'd just show the terrible consequences of those sorts of heavyweights going at it.

A fight between entities on par with Discord would probably be so bizarre that you'll never capture it properly, in all its weirdness. Energy blasts and such is pretty much the sort of thing you expect from Celestia. And from her own reactions, and uselessness, she doesn't exactly seem to be able to stand up to Discord at all.

So... yeah. Discord dodging everything like that with a huge yawn? Makes sense to me.

Edit: My first double-post ever in the history of the internet.

2005189

I haven't yet seen that fight. I knew about it in advance (and the idea was sheer nerdgasm material) though.

If Celestia fired an energy blast at Discord, it wouldn't surprise me if he opened his mouth and swallowed it.

Basically what others have been saying,

Fast paced, brief, always leaves the reader on the edge of their seat. Here, I'll write an example for you.

Twilight stood before Trixie, waiting for her to make the first move. Or perhaps Trixie was waiting for Twilight to make the first move? Neither knew what the other was going to do. Trixie broke the awkward staring contest by firing a bolt of magic at Twilight. Twilight sidestepped out of the way of the bolt, very nearly getting struck directly. Had she been even an inch too late, she would have been dead.

Twilight recovered quickly and fired her own bolt of magic back at Trixie. Trixie's reflexes were not as quick as Twilight's, and she took the blast head-on. The momentum of the magic blasted her several feet backwards, and she lay there, sprawled on the ground, unconscious from Twilight's magic.

^^^^^^
There's a short example. I could do better, but I'm on a time limit right now, but I think you get the point. Short, brief, fast-paced, to the point, etc. As long as you're not writing Silent Ponyville, then your action will be attention-grabbing. Not dissing Silent Ponyville, in fact, it's one of my favourite fics on FIMfiction, but it's just that action should be fast, not slow....like Silent Ponyville.

2006886
One thing I notice you and a lot of other people doing is EXPLAINING nearly everything that happens. This is unnecessary and only serves to slow down your scene. Explain what's necessary for the reader to understand what's going on, but leave out all the rest. For example:

Trixie broke the awkward staring contest by firing a bolt of magic at Twilight. Twilight sidestepped out of the way of the bolt, very nearly getting struck directly. Had she been even an inch too late, she would have been dead.

Might I recommend something like the following?

Trixie's horn lit up, shining brightly in the gloom and breaking the staring contest the two were having. Twilight barely had time to blink before a bolt of magic blazed into life and came at her. She threw herself to the side, barely avoiding the bolt as it shot past her and blew up a tree in the distance.

Flow is definitely important. Get too descriptive of every little move and it will slow down the fight. At the same time you need to make sure the reader does know what's going on.

There are also times where the pacing of the fight may change in which case slowing down for a couple paragraphs may be appropriate.

Example

Twilight followed right on her tail. She sensed the spell being cast, but it was already too late. In revenge for earlier Midnight had cast a net spell of her own and Twilight couldn't stop herself in time. She slammed into it and felt it wrap around her binding her in place.

She knew she had to escape quickly, but just shattering the spell as Midnight had would take a tremendous amount of energy that she couldn't afford. Instead she tried something else; sensing how the spell was made she began picking the pieces apart, dismantling the spell. Within a second the net dissolved around her. It was almost too late.

Midnight's attack, in the form of a enormous fireball was roaring through the air straight for her. She wouldn't be able to get out of the way on her own so she tucked in her wings and let gravity move her instead. She dropped like a stone, barely avoiding the deadly orb and then opened her wings just in time to pull out of the dive before plunging into the emerald flames below.

A deadly bolt, narrowly missing her flank told her it was her turn to run once more and she quickly began evasive maneuvers trying to lose her pursuer.

Twilight couldn't keep this up much longer though; the strain on her magic was taking its toll and she felt as if she'd been flying for hours. Midnight on the other hoof seemed to be thriving.

There was a flash in front of Twilight and suddenly Midnight was there, horn glowing. Twilight began to evade but it was too late...

2004025
Hmm...

A wild Metapod appeared!
Go, Metapod!
What would Metapod do?
The wild Metapod used Harden!
Metapod used Harden!
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Rest is history.

2008376 funny dude

In my opinion, the best way to write a fight scene is to write as little fighting in it as possible. You read that correctly.

Focus on why your characters are fighting. The drama takes precedence because you could write the most desperate and grueling battle to death in all of fiction, but if the characters don't really care about the outcome, there's no tension in it. Your characters should be foaming at the mouth before the fight even begins. The scale of the fight should be proportionate to it's set up.

Writing is much less effective than videos or games are at capturing action, but if you do write a fight scene, here's how the basic structure works:

First, decide who your POV character is. This can change throughout the fight, but not too frequently.

Next, write a paragraph describing how one of your characters acts in the fight. Frame it as something external to the POV character. It should be as beige and objective as possible E.G:

Nightmare Moon dropped from the clouds and flew at Celestia's back. Lightning gathered at her horn and shot forth.

Next, write a complimentary paragraph to show how your POV character responds. Now's your time to shine, make it powerful, tense and subjective.

Fear clasped Celestia's spine. She jerked around; horn trembling at her sister. "Stay back!"

Celestia's response is divided into three parts: Her immediate feelings. "Fear clasped Celestia's spine." How her reflects (for lack of a more accurate word) make her react once she's had a few microseconds to think, "She jerked around; horn trembling at her sister" and finally, the most coherent part of her reaction, the one that requires the most thought: speech. "Stay back!"

The subjective paragraph does not require all three of these parts, but any that are included must be used in this exact order. (Per my method anyway.)

You may notice that this second paragraph seems incomplete, and that's because it is. You see, the process is repeated until the fight concludes, but each pair of paragraphs should flow into the other. Let's see what we get if we add more paragraphs.

Celestia was surrounded in a sphere of light. The bolt sent ripples through it's surface and thunder through the air as it clashed. The sphere waned, then broke.

Celestia yelped. She was thrown backward and skidded through the dirt like a stone.

Final pointer. If you do adopt this structure, never put your objective content and your subjective content in the same paragraph.

That's akin to crossing the streams, resulting in a complete narrative reversal.