Short Hand: The Truth · 2:06am Aug 13th, 2021
Twilight: "Hey Shepherd! How was your meeting with the Princess?"
Shepherd: "Pretty exhausting, but productive. I had to spend the night though: Geez, you guys gotta invent cars. And roads. Or flying cars."
Twilight: "Dash thinks you're sleeping with the Princess, you know."
Shepherd: "Look, I'm not sleeping with the Princess, okay?" He sniffed a flower "I mean... I will admit, I've thought about it. A lot. Which probably shows how desperate I am for female companionship. I mean not that she's unattractive, but again. Only sapient species on my planet. But damnit, badonkadonk is universal. At least in this case. Her booty is literally cosmic. As is Luna's, holy shit. So is Fluttershy's. And Applejack's. And yours is really good too, Twilight! You've been working out and eating more, and your booty is really getting nice! Also I'm usually not so honest about this kind of thing, what did you do Twilight?"
Twilight: "Ummm... That flower is called Veritasa, a truth flower. I was working on studying it."
Shepherd: "Why do you keep stuff like this out in the bucking open?! Do you want me to spank you?! Because if that's what you want, I'm not opposed to it. I do want your boobs on your chest though."
Twilight: "I'm working on that too!"
Shepherd: "Well that's good! Holy shit I need to get out of here before-"
Twilight: "So, who's bottom is best? After the Princess'?"
Shepherd: "Fluttershy's."
Twilight: "And after her?"
Shepherd: "Applejack's."
Twilight: "And... After her?"
Shepherd: "Pinkie Pie."
Twilight: "I'm... Fourth?!"
Shepherd: "Octavia's booty is pretty awesome too-" Twilight glares angrily "See what I mean when I say you need to keep this stuff more secure?!"
Twilight: "ARGH!"
Later...
Spike: "Um... Why is Twilight eating so much more, and exercising her rear so hard?"
Shepherd: "Don't ask. You won't like the answer."
Don't ask questions you don't want honest answers to.
lol
Oh that's great.
Truly... Truth can be the most savage of things.
5567817
I similarly consider such the only stupid questions that exist. Even if it's a rhetorical question, you should be prepared for someone to give a different answer than you intended.
Aww, poor Twilight.
And we all know that despite Shepard's reassurances that she does have a nice flank (even if she isn't in the top 4 lol), she just HAS to be having a self critical view of her flanks probably thinking they are all bony and thus making her a sad pone!
:
Yes. Yes it most certainly is.
Yesssss...Twilight....yessss....( steeples fingers ) increase that ass. Embrace the Large Booty! Everything is proceeding according to MY design...
Don't read things that you aren't ready for.
Things like the current virus increasing its rate of mutation and becoming more virulent are irrelevant. Things like asteroids doing to us what Chicchuhub did to the dinosaurs are irrelevant. Things like contemplating that we could be irradiated by a supernova tomorrow are irrelevant. Things like being somewhere between sterilized and vaporized by an extragalactic superburst are irrelevant. Things like the Sun catching a strangelet and collapsing into a neutron star overnight are irrelevant. That's because certain things like the simulation hypothesis and information theory make you really question if anything matters at all.
Which makes me arrive to constructive nihilism: if it doesn't matter, why not try to make things better? Rather than owning an AC unit, I own an electric tuktuk. I can very much afford both an ac unit and my own car, but why? I also try to avoid beef, as beef rearing is the biggest primary activity in carbon emissions. I miss beef, but I can very much get my proteins from chicken, pork, eggs and others.
5567898
Sir, this is a Wendy's.
“Dear Princess Celestia,
today I learned that while Honesty may be one of the key Elements of Harmony, the occasional little white lie makes friendship run so much more smoothly...”
Absolute truth.
5568229
In the last twenty years, I've eaten breakfast soups, burritos, salads, pork, and even lamb out of McDonald's locations, but I haven't even seen the inside of a Wendy's. Lol.