I have odd skype conversations.

Bradel Bound: Ghost went all in for "chat up girl on the internet" and offered to Cyrano for me. Which I wasn't really planning to take, y'know, but I figured I'd give you this 'cause he wrote it:

[4:06:28 PM] Bradel Bound: "Your eyes, my beloved, are like twin stars blazing with light
because they remind me of two fusing masses of hydrogen
whirling around a common barycenter, alone in the night
Countless ages hence, their fuel spent, tired, they'll then
spiral inward, final fate decided by the Chandrasekhar limit
(Black holes, I hope because massive stars sparkle like your wit)"

And this

I am forever amused by my life.

Comments

[Gleaming]

You know what they say, odd is an amusing feeling.

[Razalon The Lizardman]

Wanna add me? My skype's the same as my fimfic username, either that or razalon413. Or was it both? Meh, whatever, I'd love to chat with you sometime.

[Blue_Paladin42]

:D

[GhostOfHeraclitus]

It's all part of my project: "Romantic Poetry Revised For Scientific Accuracy[1]," actually. It's all rather fragmentary right now, but I can offer

Darling my heart doesn't burn for thee—because that's utterly impossible, it's too soggy to ignite. I mean possibly you could dry it out or something but I'd be long past being 'me' at this stage, so saying it is my heart is a bit—Though it is not beyond imagining that some psychosomatic increase in core temp might be possible due to intense affect, love and whatnot. Hm. I'm not sure the heart would be affected... possibly? We may be looking at an increase of as much as one or two degrees centigrade, in extremis. So, really, darling, my heart's temperature is slightly elevated for thee. Possibly. Obviously the cardiac muscle doesn't react like any other in the body but, on the balance of things and what with the zeroth law of thermodynamics, and all, I'm fairly sure that if I were to determine my body temperature using the axilliary method, say, I would register an increase which must translate to a suitable increase in all applicable tissues including the cardiac. With... 80% confidence, I should think. Obviously an experiment would be difficult. Well. Fatal, most likely.

That didn't really get much farther than the first verse, I fear. Quite a lot of inaccuracies, it turns out.

[1] That does sound like something Twilight would do, doesn't it? Mm. Wish I wrote shipping so I could use it.

[RainbowBob]

I know everything about romance novels. Everything. I could have made better use for my life, but it's too late. This is me.

[yamgoth]

Ferret, have you come across Skype bots yet? They can be funny to talk to too. Wait... is this blog suppose to be undermining all those blogposts about conversations with Skype bots?

Is Bradel actually a Skype bot?!

2700548
Hwe hwill ahdd hyou thoo owohr contahcths[/cultist-chan]

2700553
Sometimes simple answers are the best. I should really go back to doing those.

Can you use emotes with footnotes?

2700557
Well I'm amused. Is this the poetry MrNumbers was speaking of?

What I really meant to say:
Them fancy words sure are funny :B

2700574
Harlequins turn you into SpongeBob.

Worth.

[GhostOfHeraclitus]

2700647
Of course not. This is me trying to be ridiculous on purpose. I may be utterly, utterly, incompetent as a poet (also, writer, also...) but I'm not that bad. Nobody is. Yeesh.

[Blue_Paladin42]

2700557
Maybe it's time for some Twilestia then...

[Blue_Paladin42]

2700647
:o [1]

[1] ;)

[yamgoth]

2700664
Wait... wait... this is you being terrible for the sake of just ridiculousness? I thought this was a unique blasphemy of the delicate structures and verse of poetry for the sake of... what's the word I'm looking for... parody.

I thought it was an intelligent undermining of the convention and conformity of poetic structure through a hilarious malformation of science words [1] and haphazard nonexistent verse that were held together with badly applied caulk and, quite possibly, children's non-toxic paste D:

Like, this was done for the sake of just parody, and I'm digging for meaning like a douser whose implements of trade were sat upon by his own posterior while he was taking a Cheetos break.

Well... umm... this is a mite embarrassing. Dum dee doo...

I may be utterly, utterly, incompetent as a poet (also, writer, also...) but I'm not that bad. Nobody is. Yeesh.

Tsk tsk... I see what toafan means. What you need, Ghost, is a confidence boost. Now, I am the devious type, one who mischievously plots and plans. Some of these are pretty evil (I am bad after all) and some look kinda evil, but are actually benign in goal (b-b-b-bright side of the dark side). And, Ghost, I've had my sights on you for awhile. Well, mostly after hearing about your confidence issue a few months ago.

Therefore, I will channel my inner Pinkie Pie and perhaps you will have the courage to wordcraft more afterwards. Well, right after I plan this out... I haven't the slightest idea how to go about this. But it will amount to you writing something that will boost your confidence levels over 9000. I'm quite sure, for I have confidence.

Y'know... I should've kept this a surprise :/ Courtesy be damned. Wait, I can still salvage this.

THE OMINOUS SHADOW OF UNCERTAINTY LOOMS OVER YOU GHOST. BE WARY, FOR WHO KNOWS WHEN I MAY STRIKE NEXT. FEAR ME!!!

*waggles fingers and makes creepy soft wind noises before turning into a large brown moth and fluttering away*

[1] Most of which flew over my head, but that's why pestering younger brothers for definitions is great :3

[TheJediMasterEd]

2700557

And yet Shakespeare did just that, with "My mistress' eyes are nothing like the sun."

It's a deliberate parody of all the clichés then (and still) present in love-lyrics. But it ends with a striking twist. After saying all these...really uncomplimentary things about the hypothetical "beloved," Shakespeare says:

And yet, before Heaven, I think my love as rare
As any "she" belied with false compare.

In other words, it's his love that makes her beautiful to him, not the way she looks, nor yet the sort of "false compare" that other "shes" may get from their lying lovers.

[GhostOfHeraclitus]

2701025
I never said it was a particularly original idea. I was just teasing Bradel in chat, didn't really have time to invent anything groundbreaking. However I do suspect I am one of a few[1] people in all of history who undertook to rhyme anything with 'Chandrasekhar limit.' So there's that dubious honor.

[1] A happy few. Band of brothers, really. And nerds now-a-bed shall think themselves accurs'd that they didn't think of it first and hold their geekhoods cheap &c &c

[Noble Cause]

And they;re made all the stranger by you participating, Speedbump :3

[toafan]

2700557
Far too long for romantic poetry. Try perhaps instead:

Darling my heart doesn't burn for thee
can't
too soggy

(Which I can't say is any more romantic, but I think at least flows better. Not that I would have recognized any sort of poetic form in yours, either.)

Also, Twilight is just the type to try an experiment in this area, as well. (Slightly dark?)