Butts Butts BUTTS!

if you have become human enough to cry, then all the magic in the world cannot change you back

I am an owl driving a surprisingly sophisticated human robot.

I am a horrible person.

Some weird person who writes stories about ponies. You should probably just ignore him.

Hello? Is... is this thing on? The red light means it's on, right? Or do I... I have to push a button, don't I? Well, which one? There's like ten! The black one? They're all black!