The Day Before
Octavia awoke smoothly. At least, as smoothly as a living being can actually wake up. Which isn’t saying much.
She rubbed the sleep from her eyes, casting a murky look around her room. Vinyl was nowhere in sight.
I guess there’s no spider this morning, thought Octavia groggily.
The cellist sighed slightly and stretched, forcing herself to swing onto her hooves. She swayed dangerously, her body threatening to simply fall back into bed, before taking the tottering steps into her bathroom.
She wiped the steam from her mirror with a hoof, simultaneously reaching for her toothbrush. There was a steady pounding in her head, rapid dots falling through space. A strange sensation, especially as Octavia couldn’t remember drinking the night before.
She shrugged it off, putting a single pea-sized drop of toothpaste into place. Octavia wiped the mirror again.
There was a strange blue smudge on the glass. Octavia squinted slightly. The smudge stayed as mysterious as before, the cellist’s squinting counteracted by the rapidly re-fogging mirror. Still brushing her teeth, Octavia moved her hoof in wide circles, cleaning off the majority of the mirror.
The unicorn in the mirror grinned, poking a hoof away from the shower curtain and waving merrily. The cellist felt her toothbrush clatter to the sink.
“Mornin’,” said Vinyl. “Gonna take a shower?” She waggled her eyebrows suggestively.
“I’m so sorry!” sputtered Octavia, her mouth still filled with toothpaste. “I didn’t… The door… Lock… Couldn’t hear the water!” The cellist backed towards the door as she spoke, wrenching at a knob which had, quite literally, magically locked.
“Vinyl, open the door!”
“Octy, I think that this is an important step towards improving our relationship.” The DJ was trying desperately to keep a straight face. Not that Octavia noticed. She was far too busy covering her eyes to focus on Vinyl’s face.
The cellist turned a bright pink. “I’m not going to shower with you!” she shouted. Her voice cracked just the slightest bit.
“Are you sure?” purred Vinyl. “I’m sure it would be fun.”
Octavia felt her vision blur. More blood than she thought she had in her entire body had suddenly pooled in her head at Vinyl’s suggestion. A suggestion which wasn’t entirely unwelc—
The cellist stomped one hoof down on the other, squeaking slightly at the pain.. Bad brain! Stop that!
“Hey, you okay there Tavi?” asked a worried Vinyl.
Octavia looked up. And was filled with a strange mixture of regret and that feeling that could only be described as—
“... Damn.”
The shower had straightened Vinyl’s mane. A stray strand hung just over a magenta eye. The effect on Octavia was immediate. The cellist turned towards the door, hooves frantically searching for the way to unlock it.
“Hey Octy, you okay?” The DJ’s amusement was tinted with worry.
“Vinyl, open this door or I swear that you’re walking out of this bathroom with a bright red hoofmark adorning your face!”
Vinyl grinned cheekily. “As kinky as that sounds, I can’t just go opening doors. I’m showering! What if somepony walked in?!”
Octavia thumped her head against the door.
“And,” continued Vinyl, “I don’t see what the big deal is. You see me naked on a daily basis! Hell, everypony does!” The DJ’s voice grew husky. “But you get to see me in the shower. Aren’t you lucky?”
The cellist sighed, her head pressed firmly against the door. “Just unlock this damn piece of wood, Vinyl.”
There was a slight click as Vinyl’s aura wrapped the doorknob and quickly dissipated. The cellist breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you.”
Octavia jumped as she felt the press of lips on her cheek. Her mane and part of her coat were quickly drenched. The DJ could be remarkably quiet when she wanted to be, even when climbing out of a shower.
“No problem,” said Vinyl. She hit the cellist’s flank, quickly pushing her outside and re-locking the door. “Now get out, ya perv! I’m showering!”
Octavia’s eyes widened. She turned, repeatedly pounding on the door with her hoof. “Vinyl! Open this door so I can hit you!”
“Can’t hear you!” came the DJ’s muffled reply. “I’m in the shower!”
They kept up this exchange for a few minutes. Harpo had plenty of time to slip into the run, serenely sipping on a cup of coffee while the mares had their quarrel.
Octavia turned, finding the composer in mid-sip. Harpo held up a hoof, finishing his sip as quickly as he could before looking at the cellist.
“Is it physically impossible for you two to have a normal morning?”
“Apparently.”
***
Vinyl had finished her shower. Octavia had promptly smacked the back of the DJ’s head. Harpo was eating breakfast. Everypony was happy and a silence had fallen onto the room.
Harpo absentmindedly stirred his cornflakes. “I haven’t been in my own home in days.”
Vinyl nodded. “Work does that.”
“Or at least this work does,” added Octavia.
The other two nodded in agreement, munching at their cereal.
“Speaking of work,” said the DJ, “where did you disappear to, Harpo?”
“I disappeared?”
“Indeed,” said Octavia brightly. “Late last night when Vinyl’s movements began to vaguely resemble dancing.”
“I take offense to that,” said the DJ.
“Good,” replied the cellist. The mares turned expectantly turned towards Harpo.
“Look at the time!” he exclaimed. “Fancy Pants wants to see us. In fact, we should get going right now. No time to talk!”
“Harpo Parish Nadermane, explain yourself!” said Octavia. But the composer, with years of practice behind him, had managed to escape.
Vinyl gave a low, impressed whistle. “He moves fast when he wants to.”
***
The walk to Fancy Pants’s home was uneventful. At least, not taking into account Harpo’s skillful dodging around explaining where he had gone the previous night. Now they sat in the familiar manor, the mares sitting together, the composer sitting in a chair of his own. A slightly haggard looking Fancy Pants sat before them, deftly mixing drinks.
“Are you three ready for tomorrow?” he asked politely.
The musicians nodded.
“No problems? Everypony fully understands what will be expected of them?”
The musicians nodded.
The businesspony breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, that’s one thing going for us.”
“What’s up boss?” asked Vinyl.
Fancy Pants smiled, magically patting the DJ’s head. “Nothing you need to worry about. Let the grown-ups handle things.”
“I’m over 20!” protested Vinyl, her head dodging and weaving in an unsuccessful attempt to avoid the magic.
The businesspony snorted. “You’re still a filly; I’m more than twice your age. In any case, Fleur and the Doctor are out in the field, covering their respective duties. They’re more than enough to handle this.”
“Handle what?” asked Harpo.
Fancy Pants raised an eyebrow. “Nothing you’ll need to worry about.”
“Blueblood, most likely,” said Octavia.
“Octavia!” whined the venerable stallion. “I said that you needn’t concern yourself!”
“Then it is Blueblood,” said Harpo.
Fancy Pants blinked. “Now, I never said that.”
Vinyl pointed at the stallion. “I know that face, boss! That’s your lying face! It means that you’re lying!”
“Really?” said Harpo sarcastically. “A lying face means that he’s lying? I never would have guessed.”
“Shut up, Harpbutt.”
Fancy Pants sighed. He’d been doing that quite often in recent weeks. “Okay, fine. Yes, it’s Blueblood. None of you are allowed to help, though we do appreciate the offer. All you have to do is ensure that you’re ready for tomorrow. Then this whole business will be over and done with. In fact, we’re lucky that it hasn’t been blown out of proportion already. Not that the Prince hasn’t been trying.”
“Wait, what’s been going on?” asked Harpo.
“The media,” replied the other stallion with evident disdain. “Snap Shot has been particularly horrid, constantly poking his nose into places it shouldn’t be. Thank Celestia for Fleur de Lis and her social skills.” He leaned forward slightly, speaking clearly. “That’s another thing. There will likely be some form of reporter at tomorrow’s party. Watch what you do and if you see a dark blue stallion with a flashing camera cutie mark, run. If he’s with Quick Quill, run and hide.”
The musicians nodded. Everypony in Canterlot knew to be on their best behavior when Snap Shot and his writer Quick Quill were around or risk being ostracized from high society. Together, they had a greater law-keeping effect than a troop of the Royal Guard.
Octavia raised her hoof, a thoughtful look on her face.
Fancy Pants gave an amused smile. “Yes, Miss Philharmonica?”
“Why?” asked the cellist. “Why does Prince Blueblood go out of his way to get in our way? What does Blueblood stand to gain from bothering us and taking photos of rather…. embarrassing moments?”
“Because he’s a dick?” offered Vinyl. “A self-obsessed, elitist prick?”
“Language, Vinyl,” said the elder stallion with little conviction.
“But seriously,” said the DJ, “even my parents complained about him! And they’re self-obsessed, elitist pricks, too!”
“He’s also Princess Celestia’s nephew,” said Harpo. “Nopony’s willing to confront him about his attitude. At least, nopony who’s seen past that ‘Prince Charming’ crap he’s been trying to put out.”
“Indeed,” said Fancy Pants. He glanced at Octavia “Well, Marcato Philharmonica has expressed a few… colorful phrases about the Prince.”
Octavia smiled slightly. “If anypony were to say it to Blueblood himself, it would be Father.”
The businesspony returned the smile. “No doubt.” He got to his hooves, the drink he was mixing untouched on the table. “In any case, I called you here to check in on your progress. But it seems as though you don’t really need my help.” An ironic smile twisted his lips. “As per usual.” The stallion waved a hoof in the air. “Take the rest of the day as you need it. Just be ready for tomorrow.”
***
“Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, creeps in this petty pace from day to day to the last recorded syllable of time, and all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way to dusty death.”
Hoity Toity and Blueblood sat in the earth pony’s mansion. The day had been uneventful, the sun had already set. The Prince had shown up unannounced, quickly strolling in and ordering one of the many maids to bring him something to drink.
Little wonder that a play centering on murder was dancing through Hoity Toity’s mind.
“Very nice,” deadpanned Prince Blueblood.
“It’s from Mare Beth,” said Hoity Toity. “It seems appropriate.”
“I know where it’s from,” snapped the other. “Don’t insult me.”
“I would never.”
Blueblood gave a dismissive hmmmph. “Of course you wouldn’t. But you don’t show even the slightest gratitude when I would come all the way here to grace you with my presence.”
Hoity Toity felt a vein in his neck twitch. It was strange how, of all ponies, Blueblood seemed to irritate him the most. “And to what do I owe this great pleasure?”
“I’ve been hearing rumors, Hoity Toity.”
“Yes,” replied the producer with only the slightest bit of sarcasm, “there are quite a lot of those floating around Canterlot.”
A butler stepped forward, carefully placing a cup of auburn liquid in front of the Prince. Blueblood sniffed at the drink, casting a critical eye over every aspect.
He set it aside, his face twisted in a grimace. “I don’t drink alcohol. And most definitely not this dribble. I need a properly steeped tea.” Blueblood waved a dismissive hoof at the butler. The Prince turned back towards Hoity Toity. “Here’s something from your playwright. ‘O Celestia, that ponies should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains.’ I can’t believe that some ponies are willing to poison themselves like that.”
Prince Blueblood seemed perfectly content to take a superior attitude.
Hoity Toity gestured towards the drink. A unicorn butler floated the drink over to his employer.
“I’ll drink to that.”
Blueblood scowled. “But as I was saying. There have been rumors flying about, Hoity Toity. Rumors about you.”
Hoity Toity took a sip from his drink. “Pray tell.”
“An associate of mine saw you leave Fancy Pants’s mansion sometime this week.”
“And is this ‘associate’ trustworthy?”
The Prince raised an eyebrow. “As trustworthy as you are, it seems.”
“Are you suggesting,” asked Hoity Toity, putting his drink down, “that I would deign to work with the pony who is currently shaping up to become my greatest rival? By the Princesses, it’s Fancy Pants we’re speaking about. He has a hoofhold in any industry you’d care to name. There’s hardly a need for me to work with him.”
The butler returned, this time with a teacup. He placed the meticulously made tea beside the Prince. Blueblood hardly spared it a glance.
“Yes,” said Blueblood. “I suppose that’s true. But I’ve done some digging of my own, Hoity Toity. I had no idea that you and Fancy Pants had such a history.”
“Once you’ve spent enough time in Canterlot, you’ll find that all ponies have a history with one another.”
“But your former employer?” Blueblood laughed. “You used to work for Fancy Pants! One of the designers for his fashion line, weren’t you? He gave you the contacts required to start your own business. Are you sure that there’s no gratitude,” he said the word as though it were a curse, “towards Fancy Pants.”
“Everything I owe him, I’ve already payed back in full.” Hoity Toity reached for his drink, but retracted his hoof at the last moment.
“But is that true? Hmmmm, Hoitoi?” The Prince smiled tauntingly.
The other stallion felt his eye twitched. He’d always hated that name. But it seemed so much worse when Blueblood used it. “You’ll find out tomorrow,” he said through gritted teeth.
“Oh, I think I’m already well aware of what I’ll find tomorrow.” Blueblood got to his hooves, walking across the table, stopping a few feet away from Hoity Toity. “You said that Fancy Pants would be your greatest rival. You’re wrong. It’s me, you idiot. I’ll work with you only until Syncopated Records is no more. It only makes sense to break the weakest link first. But then, Hoitoi. Then I’ll make sure that my company, that Blueblood Studios, is the only company.”
Hoity Toity didn’t even blink. “How long have you been rehearsing that speech, Blueblood?”
The Prince scowled, turning away with a huff. He walked towards the door.
“Oh, and Blueblood!” called Hoity Toity.
The unicorn turned with a grimace.
“You’re an idiot. A self-absorbed, egotistical idiot who honestly think that everything will go his way, who thinks that he can do no wrong and that he has an incredible talent. But you’re a foal. And no foul play, no idiotic threats or constant annoyances can make up for what experience adds. You think that you can just horn Fancy Pants out of the way. Worse that that, you’ve threatened my company in my presence.”
Hoity Toity laughed. “Honestly, Prince, that’s just fucking stupid. Yes, I’ve been working with Fancy Pants. Yes, he’s the greater threat, but I just don’t like you. Scratch that, I really don’t like you. Which is why I want to get you as far away from my industry as possible.”
Blueblood turned red. “You plebeian! How dare you speak to me like that?! This is my industry, this is where I make my stand to you plebeian who think yourself superior to me! You call me a foal, but you’re just too old, too caught up in your dementia to reali—”
“Get out of my house,” said Hoity Toity with a wave of his hoof. “Your temper tantrums bore me. Consider our agreement terminated.”
The Prince turned redder still, a strand of his blonde mane falling in front of his face. “Terminated?! Of course it’s terminated but not because you say so! I say that it’s terminated! And another thi—”
“Get out. Of. My. House.”
Blueblood scowled again. He marched towards the door, throwing it open with his magic and slamming it shut for good measure. A vase standing on a pedestal wobbled dangerously. A unicorn maid quickly wrapped it in a sheath of magic.
The butler stepped forward, taking up Blueblood’s untouched tea. “Forgive me for saying, sir,” he said in a very proper tone, “but that was not one of your more diplomatic moments.”
Hoity Toity downed the rest of his drink in a single movement. “He had it coming, Worth. You saw that.”
Penny Worth nodded. “I’m not saying that you were in the wrong. The little bastard deserved that and more.”
The employer started, throwing an incredulous look at the prim and proper butler. Penny Worth shrugged, reaching over and taking Hoity Toity’s now empty glass.
The producer laughed, shaking his head slightly as he got to his hooves. “I’ll be retiring for the night, Penny Worth. Tomorrow’s an important day.”
“Of course, sir.”
Hoity Toity walked towards the master bedroom. “Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow.” He turned off the lanterns as he passed them. “Out, out, brief candle. Life’s but a walking shadow.” The stallion reached his bedroom. He winced slightly as he replayed a bit of his conversation with Blueblood.
A slow smile grew across his face. “An idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” Hoity Toity climbed into bed. “And he doesn’t even drink.”
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WOOO update!
MOAR
I thought I recognised some parts. Must've read them in Macbeth.
Also, great chapter! I love how this story's going
Not one of Hoity Toity's brightest speeches. Politics doesn't work like that, and I felt a little cheated by the second part of the chapter. But I liked the first part, though.
I wanna know who the one dick is who thumbed this down.. Maybe it was Blueblood... Anyways I do enjoy your writing, so so soooo very much. Please keep up these lovely updates.
Alfred Pennyworth.
3140116
Yay!
The plot thickens...
... but thats because Vinyl's been eating to many sweets, on a different not, this story is really heating up
I just became a fan of Hoity's after that little exchange he had with Blueblood.
So glad to see a new chapter! The beginning actually made me laugh out loud.This is becoming one of my favorite shipfics.
Ohh, some shit talkin' going on! Suck it, Blueblood! Speaking of...
3140147
Don't talk about my waifu like that.
3140116 Holy hell that makes Hoity Toity batman!
I am not the biggest fan of Hoity Toity, but I really like him in this chapter xD
Finally someone had the guts to tell blueballs the truth. That douche
Anyway thanks for the update. Harpo is still (besides Octavia) the best character in here
I repeat: you update too fast.
Oh, dear... Vinyl, step away from the shower head. It's affecting your judgement. Vi- I said, step away, Vinyl! Vin- DON'T POINT IT AT OCTAVIA!
I have, by now, lost complete overview of where this story may or may not be headed. So I'll give up and just enjoy the ride.
3142709 Biatch, your waifu? Back of G, she hangin on my turf now!
3145894
Ooohh, you're askin' for an ass beatin', boy.
3144430
Hahaha! Victory! I've finally lost you people amongst the twist and turns of my slowly moving plot!
...
Story plot. The twist and turns of my slowly moving story plot.
3139913
It's actually two now
But I have you wonderful people to inflate my ego, so that's fine with me!
3145940derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDIvMjQvMjNfMjVfMjVfMjU4XzI1NDQxOF9fVU5PUFRfX3NhZmVfdHdpbGlnaHRfc3BhcmtsZV9wcmluY2Vzc19jZWxlc3RpYV9pbWFnZV9tYWNyb19mYWljXzUxMGQ0MTc4N2YxMjNiOTE3ODAwMDEwYV93cm9uZ19uZWlnaGJvcmhvb2QucG5nLnBuZyJdXQ/254418__safe_twilight%2Bsparkle_princess%2Bcelestia_image%2Bmacro_faic_twiface_wrong%2Bneighborhood.png
3145967
Suuuuure the story's plot.
3145967
That's what I meant too, I mean.
What? Story-plo- Of course! That too!
Macbeth.
3145967 I love your plot. It excites me.
3154042
...
I need an adult.
3154638
He is an adult.
AP Lit was a great class. I enjoyed it very much so.
Was it Moneypenny from James Bond? and I love you're writing.
Pokerface,pokerface,pokerface,pokerfa.....ocrapimagonner(Anime style nosebleed knockout).............I think I need a transfusion now
lol
Some very steamy moments (quite literally) in this chapter. Their little... expedition into the social life of Canterlot should be quite enjoyable to see (next chapter?), but I need my sleep, so I'll finish this up tomorrow or the next day.
~SolidFire
For a second there I read that as Penny Wise.... Pennywise working for Hoity... Now THATS a scary thought
Woo! Batman reference! Right?
How the hell did hoity toity get Batman's butler??? Alfred would never leave the Wayne family...
3162375
(Having skipped the comments) Well if it's not Alfred, then your points are meaningless and I don't want your reference anyway.
4002937
Plot Twist! Hoity Toity is the Bruce Wayne of Equestria.
Is it wrong for me to love Hoity at this point?
Probably.
Bam! Fuck Blueblood, the dickhead.
WHO DOWNVOTED THIS? Why would anyone want to, its awesome!
900 strong baby~
Nice job man, nice job!
Hoity may be a jerk, but he's a jerk who sticks to his principles. I can respect that.
Also, the Alfred reference has inspired a new headcanon: Hoity Toity maintains the overly snobbish attitude to keep some distance, so nopony questions where he goes some nights, or wonders why he and Batmane have never been seen in the same place at the same time...
Go AP Lit!
6385155
That would be cool.
Well I'm pretty sure Rarity would, she is an Element of Harmony that defends Equestria.
in my opinion the Macbeth quotes are actually quite fitting because Prince Blueblood is headed for the same path as Macbeth though without the beheading hopefully (sorry for anyone who hasn't read the play or seen it didn't mean to be a spoiler)
9778326
I can't believe you'd spoil a 500 year old story like that.