The Original Character Immigration Offices

by TypewriterError

Wandering Cloud

Wandering Cloud
By
RisingOne

The wind blew softly through my mane as I drifted among the clouds. I wasn’t moving very fast, just a lazy flight on a nice sunny day. My wings beat softly, doing little more than keeping me aloft as I let the wind carry me wherever it pleased. I was just basking in the warmth of the sun on my stomach as I did my thing.

That’s just what I do. Wandering Cloud’s my name, and driftin’ is my game.

A pleasant coolness settled on my bright blue coat as I flew through a cloud. “Oh,” my voice was sleepy, “That was a nice cumulus.” If I had to choose, cumulus clouds would definitely be my favorite. Those are those soft, fluffy ones that match the typical cloud stereotypes. They also make the best beds.

“Speakin’ of which,” I drawled, settling into one of the aforementioned gatherings of condensed water vapor, “A nap sounds pretty darn good right about now.”

My wings fluffed my temporary bed as I scooted around to settle in. I raised my front hooves and placed them behind my head as I let the gentle rays of the sun lull me to sleep. I took a second to scratch an itch on my scalp, ruffling my alabaster mane as I did so. If someone were to look at me, I wouldn’t put it past them to think I was bald. I chuckled softly at the thought.

Just as the Sandmare was about to do her thing, a thought popped into my head.

“Wasn’t I supposed ta do somethin’?” I muttered, scrunching my brow in thought. I let the thought bounce around my cranium for a little while, but in the end I let out a barely audible “Nah, nothin’ I can’t do later.”

As it turned out, later was a bit longer than I thought it would be. Now, I was used to taking naps in the middle of the day, that was just a part of my lifestyle. What wasn’t common was when I go to sleep at the height of the day, and I wake up to a majestic sunset.

I rubbed my eyes and sat up on the cloud. “Dude,” my voice was as mellow as ever, “I must’ve been tired.”

Standing up, I did some quick stretches. I watched as my cutie mark stretched on my skin. The swirling lines almost appearing to move the cloud they sat behind. I then flared my wings and and faced the final rays of the day. “Nice job there, Celestia,” I said, giving a quick salute to the sun. “I’ll be seein’ you soon, your majesty.”

With that, I leaned to the side and let myself settle into a freefall. The wind in my fur did a good job of eliminating any sleep that may have tried to stick around. I looked down, and saw several ponies pointing at me with worried expressions. I even saw a couple pegasi preparing to take off.

“Can’t have them ruinin’ mah fun, can I?” a grin formed on my face as I spoke, and my wings shot out to slow my descent. I swept low to the ground in a grand arc, pulling up and doing a backflip. I landed on all four hooves, knees bent, and looked around. Instead of the applause I expected, I received a number of blank stares. A moment passed, and most of the gathered ponies shook their heads and walked away.

“Philistines,” I grumbled, “They wouldn’t know good flyin’ if it came up and bit them in the flank.”

I shook my head and cleared the negative thoughts. A laidback grin found its way onto my face once more, and I took a seat on a nearby bench.

“Now what was it I was supposed ta do?” I rubbed a hoof on my chin. The events of the day so far replayed in my head on fast forward.

When I came back to just before I leapt off the cloud, it hit me. “Of course!” I shook my head and laughed, “I have an appointment ta keep.”

I hopped off of the bench and struck a pose. My sky blue wings were stretched wide, and my legs were bent. It was a picture perfect take off pose, and I was sure more than one pony took a second to appreciate it. Why wouldn’t they? I am quite the flyer, after all.

This time, the wind blew past me at a much faster rate. Compared to the type of flying I had been doing all day, I may as well have been doing a sonic rainboom. Stopping among the clouds, I held a hoof over my eyes and looked around. It took me a second, but I spotted it. Not as far as I thought was a rather inconspicuous building that was my destination.

I dropped onto a cloud and kicked off not even a second after, dispersing the condensed water and shooting away like a bullet.

“This is goin’ ta be a piece of cake,” I told myself as I flew, “I’ll just waltz in, say hello to whoever is supposed to approve me, and walk out a citizen of Equestria.” Some would have mistaken my confidence as cockiness, I’m sure. I didn’t care about them though. Those negative emotions were bad for the coat, anyways.

I tilted my flightpath and quickly came to a skidding halt in front of the Original Character Immigration Offices. I noticed a few bystanders coughing in the dust I had kicked up.

I remained in my awesome landing pose, for my fans that I was sure I had just gained.

Looking around, though, I found that none of the others seemed to be paying attention to me. Instead, they all were either walking into the building with a hopeful look on their face, or walking out looking thoroughly dejected.

“Wow,” I shook my head in exasperation, “I guess I’ll have to wait until I’m actually in Equestria to show off. Nobody out here can appreciate a good trick.”

It was a shame, too. But, that’s just how things work, I guess. Some ponies just don’t know talent when they see it.

I walked into the building, my confidence through the roof. I had this whole interview business in the bag, there was no doubt in my mind.

Casually, I strolled up the reception desk. “Hey there,” I said, giving the mare behind the desk an easy grin, “I’m here for an appointment.”

She gave me a cold look, and asked for my name. Wow, I thought, Someone’s a little cranky.

“Name’s Wandering Cloud,” I told her, holding my expression.

The receptionist looked at a clipboard for a moment, flipping through the pages clamped onto it.

“You’re four hours late,” she told me, her voice devoid of emotion.

I laughed lightly, and told her “Oh, I don’t bother ta keep track of the time like that. I get where I need to be when I need to be there. That’s just how I live, baby.”

Her icy glare gave me the feeling that my charms weren’t working their usual magic. “Well, that’s not how this office works. If you schedule an appointment with us, you have to show up at the time we set, or you lose your appointment.”

Well, that would be bad. But I wasn’t going to let some mean ol’ mare keep me from where I wanted to be.

“Now, don’t be that way.” I leaned farther forward, turning my charisma up to its maximum. “I’m sure there is some way you could let me have mah interview.”

She still didn’t look pleased, but I’m sure I saw her expression ease up a bit. Yes! I wanted to pump my hoof, No one can resist the ol’ Cloud charm.

She looked down at her clipboard again, and said “I can squeeze you in at eight o’clock.” I thought I heard her say something like “Anything to get you out of my mane,” but I gave a tiny shrug and thanked her, charisma still flowing.

I took a seat in the rather spartan waiting room, and relaxed. I closed my eyes and decided to nap until my interview. Someone would come to wake me up when it was time, I was certain.

It didn’t feel like long until I heard an annoyed voice call “Mister Cloud!”

I stretched lazily, and looked up to see the receptionist mare giving me a look to match her tone. I smacked my lips a few times and said “Yeah?”

“You’re up for your interview.” Wow, that pony needed an attitude adjustment.

Maybe I’ll take her out on a date later. No pony can stay that uptight around me, I thought, walking past her desk. I didn’t know where I was going, but I figured my hooves wouldn’t steer me wrong.

“Hey!” I paused mid-step. “Your interviewer is Miss Sparkle.” It was the receptionist again. I guess she really did care.

“Thanks, sweet cheeks!” I called back, hardly turning my head. Facing forward, I walked through the hallway checking the names on all of the doors.

“Nope, not that one, not him, nope,” I said, walking at a sedate pace. “Ah, here we are. Miss T. Sparkle.”

I opened the door and walked in, the perfect example of suave. Behind a short desk sat a purple unicorn. On her desk were two trays, one bare and the other covered by quite the stack of papers.

“Looks like a lot of uncool ponies came in today.” In my mind, I was already in Equestria, drifting through those lovely clouds.

“Sir,” Miss Sparkle’s voice snapped me out of my reverie, “If you would have a seat, we can get started.”

“Gotcha,” I flashed her one of my best grins, and smoothly flopped into the seat.

She gave me a deadpan stare in return. Perhaps clicking my tongue like I had was a bit much. Nah, the mares love it. I’m sure she was just tired from a long string of bad interviews.

Good thing I’m here to break the chain, I thought.

“Now, if we could begin, my name is Twilight Sparkle. And yours is,” she took a second to look at some papers on her desk, “Wandering Cloud? Is that correct?”

“Yes ma’am, it is. But you can just call me Cloud.” I looked straight into her eyes as I said this.

“Well, Mister Cloud,” she took special care to emphasize the word “Mister,” “Why do you want to live in Equestria?”

“Straight ta the point. I like that in a mare,” I told her, leaning forward to make sure she knew I was paying attention. She did not seem to be amused. Wow, the mares around her just can’t be pleased. I cleared the thought from my mind as I began to speak. “I want ta live in Equestria because I think it would benefit from my presence,” I told her.

“Oh? How so?” she actually seemed intrigued, judging by her raised eyebrow. I had a hoof in the door, now all I had to do was make my pitch. No problem.

“You see,” I began, “I may not have any fancy ‘skills,’ but I do have something else that is much better. I have coolness. In fact, I’d say that I am so cool that my presence alone could make any place about twenty percent cooler. Which is why I drift from town to town, spreading my awesomeness.”

Her cold gaze could have frozen boiling water. Perhaps I had overwhelmed her, and that was the only reaction she could give.

“Is there anything else you have to offer Equestria? Anything at all?” the way she asked that gave me the feeling that she already knew the answer.

“Well, no,” I even forced myself to seem a little flustered. It was endearing, and I needed her to be on my side. “But what else do you need?”

“I see,” she said, bringing my application papers in front of her. She opened a drawer and pulled out a large stamp.

“My eyes must be playing tricks on me,” I thought, “For a second I thought that stamp looked red.”

“After reviewing your application, and hearing your case, I have come to a decision.” The stamp came down hard on the paper. And when she lifted it up, I saw that my eyes hadn’t been wrong.

“D-denied?” I stuttered in my mind, “What?”

“You’re just another knock off of a close friend of mine. And you don’t even have any of her redeeming qualities, only a cockiness that seems to be your whole personality,” Twilight told me, setting my application on the larger stack of papers on her desk. “You even stole one of her catchphrases.”

I think I felt a twitch under my right eyes, but that was the only movement. Twilight shuffled through her papers for a second, before gathering them and placing them in her desk. Twilight then looked up at me again, and let out a bothered sigh.

Pressing a button on a small box, she said “We’ve got another one.” I wasn’t certain what she meant, but a moment later two large, white stallions came in and picked me up. I still did not move as they carried me out of the building. At least they didn’t throw me, instead setting me on the ground, where a few other ponies were also lying. None of them were moving either, all of our hooves sticking straight into the air.

“My coolness,” a voice whispered, “Failed me?”

I’m not certain the voice was my own.

Comments

[Bed Head]

Wanna know something funny? I had an idea for something very similar to this, though kinda involving the PPC as well.

These little snippets are a good chuckle, and you seem to be doing a fine job hitting all the cliches for the rejected characters. I can't wait to see what's next !

Part of me is hoping we'll see a Dragon OC eventually...

[TypewriterError]

2225643 Actually, I only wrote the chapter with my OC and the preface. So, if you want to do a dragon OC, you're more than welcome to do so.

[Alondro]

2225670 You need to include a vampony, any kind of wolf invoking Norse mythology, and viciously insane griffons.

[Changeling-Drone]

you should make one for the ones who did get and how they get into equastria

[TypewriterError]

2226203 Maybe when I figure I've had enough entires. Probably won't happen for awhile though.

[Changeling-Drone]

hmmm im not good at writing stories can i just tel you my character and you make the story

[TypewriterError]

2226218 I guess I'll give it a shot. Could you send it in a PM?

[Alondro]

Twilight Sparkle, the PMS Bitch Princess, is sitting angrily, shuffling her papers angrily, and generally doing everything she can to be nothing like her canon self as Helix merrily comes trotting in. He hops up into the chair in front of her intimidating desk with a careless flippancy and prods his goggles, taking them off to wipe them while humming "Ode to Joy" loudly, oblivious to Twilight's twitching eyebrow.

"Soooo, Mr.... Helix, is it?" the new lavender Queen Meanie grumbles while clenching Helix's application paperwork in one hoof, the rejection stamp gripped tightly in the other. "I see you're a scientist. Well, we have magic in Equestria, and we don't need your anti-religious rhetoric defying the might of our glorious goddesses! Myself now included, of course!" She sniffs haughtily, secure in herself, delighting in crushing OC creatures' dreams.

Helix yawns widely, "Hmm? Oh, so sorry. It's hard to take you seriously. You're boring. You're boring me." Leaning forward with his goggles in his hooves, he stares into her eyes with a disturbing coolness that sends a chill down Twilight's ignorant spine. "Besides, you've made the wrong assumption. I'm not interested in becoming a citizen of Equestria at all."

Twilight's slight trace of concern faded from her face, which resumed its previously angry glare, "The other OCs sent you, didn't they? Just to tick me off?"

Helix chuckles, "Not exactly, though I do represent quite a number of them... quite a large number... a legion of them, one might say." He leaned closer, "No, I'm here for another reason entirely."

Twilight leaned on her forehooves with a smug grin, "And what might that be, Mr. My-OC-Is-Just-So-Awesome?"

"Well, simply this..." Helix placed the goggles back over his green eyes. "... to get close enough to do this." His hoof pressed a tiny trigger on the edge of his glasses and a concentrated gas jetted straight into Twilight's nostrils, timed perfectly by the brilliant scientist to coincide with her next inward breath.

Twilight's eyes bulged for a moment, realizing briefly what had just occurred before the powerful sedative took effect. She attempted to light her horn, but the chemicals had quickly reached her central nervous system through the nasal epithelium, and she slumped unconscious from the table and slammed to the ground while Helix watched with sick satisfaction. Casually, the truly brilliant scientist (who can actually construct such devices and synthesize such compounds, mind) clopped around the table and lifted the limp head of the new Princess so her cloudy eyes met his.

"Such a shame that Equestrian neurochemistry is virtually identical to ours. I didn't even have to invent a new compound. You know, you should have accepted as many of those OCs as you could. Your country really could have used the numbers. Now, they're all ours, on our side, willing to do whatever we tell them for the promise (which we fully intend to fulfill) that they will be able to live whereever they wish in your world." His hoof dropped her head carelessly, and it hit the floor with a thud. Then, he opened the plot-hole portal. Reaching into his mane, Helix pulled out a small iron ring and jammed in on Twilight's horn. "Ugh, magc-restricting rings. Ridiculous, cliche plot devices. But, effective, undeniably so. Time to depart! I have all manner of fun and games planned for you, Twilight! But you'll survive them all, if not exactly in the best of physical condition when I'm through. I want you to see Equestria crumble to the OCs you so cruelly threw aside. I want you to watch your beloved Celestia devoured alive by the demon you so eagerly welcomed among yourselves. I want all hope to drain from your body, mind, and soul until you're nothing but a broken husk. Perhaps I'll let Chrysalis drain you dry of love. Oh, did I forget to mention the Changelings joined us? They were quite eager to assist!"

Helix put a hoof over his mouth to muffle his voice to a breathy, exaggerated rumble, "And only then will you have my permission to die." He cackled, "Oh god, that never stops being funny!" And with that, the madpony grabbed Twilight's tail in his teeth and unceremoniously dragged the purple princess prick to the doom awaiting her in his power.

(PS: See how cheap and easy it is to write revenge fics? I just banged this out without even trying!)

[Alondro]

2226289 Why not! The more villains, the merrier! And you know, Discord can bring him into being with a single snap of his fingers. (JOOOOOOOOOIN USSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!)

[dzamie]

2226443
Geh, two paragraphs in and it's already forgotten that Twilight has been a scientist before...

[Alondro]

2228334 Her 'scientist' persona was a stock parody. Therefore, I have reduced her to another stock parody for my plot-convenient purposes.

[ShadyCanopy]

2226443 (based off of my submission, where Helix knocks my OC out after my OC refuses to join the Army Of Chaos. Yes, Alondro, I am trying to make your character canon in the story.)

Suddenly, I crash through the roof. "Forgot about me didn't you, Helix? Well, believe me, I haven't forgotten about you!" I summon my staff and charge at Helix.

He steps to the side, easily dodging my charge. He opens the plot hole and pulls out a vial. "I'm not one for physical fighting, but..." He cracks the vial over my head, and as the formula begins to sink into my skin, I begin to feel drowsy.

Must... fight the... potion... My head falls forward, and I slump to the ground, unconscious.

[WIL_I_ZIN]

Sorry buddy. Looks like you were too cool for equestria.