Timed Ramblings

by Midnight herald

Waiting

There was nothing to do but wait, wait in the ugly white room with its ugly green curtains. She couldn’t turn to look at the clock, couldn’t let Applejack out of her sight for a single second. Not right now, not after what she’d done. So she counted time by the blaring heart monitor, by the hum of the artificial lungs that were helping Applejack do what she had to. It was weird, thinking about it. How the deep breaths her sister would take without thought were now so strained, so obvious, so terrifyingly fragile. The hiss of new oxygen flowing through the tubes drove her to distraction, marked out in little beeps and spikes, in Applejack’s vitals. There was nothing Apple Bloom could do but wait.

A polite little tapping on the doorframe startled Apple Bloom out of her reflections. She made some kind of noise, maybe a “come in”, maybe just some nonsense syllables. It was hard to tell right now, with the hissing and the beeping and her sister’s face all in front of her, all vying for attention.

“Hey,” It was Twilight. Of course it was Twilight, with a knock that timid and polite. Only Twilight bothered to knock, really. Everyone else either barged in and surprised her or waited politely outside until she noticed them, if ever.

“Hey,” Apple Bloom answered, her throat choked up with worry and tiredness and just plain not talking. She coughed to clear the worst of the phlegm and finally looked away from the bed and machinery, away from Applejack’s peaceful face, to nervously let her eyes glance Twilight over. Twilight had been a godsend. She was the first one Apple Bloom thought of when it happened. Normally she’d go to Applejack, but... Twilight was always helping in emergencies too, so it all worked out.

And since they’d gotten Applejack to the hospital, Twilight kept coming in to check on both of them, make sure Apple Bloom ate and slept, stuff like that. And right now, her magic held in it two steaming mugs of coffee. Apple Bloom reached out for one, slipped her hoof through the wide handle and took a long pull at it. Twilight had outdone herself. The coffee came gritty, dark, and bitter as sin, just how she liked it. Just how she felt right now. Because Applejack was lying in a coma, and it was all Apple Bloom’s fault. It was all her fault, but there was nothing she could do but wait.

“How’s today looking?” Twilight asked, a practiced nonchalance in her tone. She’d stopped asking if Apple Bloom was alright, because she knew the answer would always be no.

“Doc hasn’t been by yet, but it looks to be the same,” she answered, taking another pull of coffee. “Hasn’t changed for days, Twilight,” she confided, hiding behind the large stoneware mug. “Starting to think it’ll never change.”

“Don’t say that,” Twilight snapped. Apple Bloom cringed, and Twilight took some kind of deep breath, moving her hoof in and out, her eyes shut. “Sorry, Apple Bloom. We’re both tired, I shouldn’t have snapped. It’s just...” Twilight sighed, sounding like death warmed over, if only just. “You’re the one I expect to be hopeful, when I can’t... I’m really worried, her charts don’t look great, and now you’re, I dunno, giving up on her or something?”

Apple Bloom finished the coffee with a vengeance, to keep the nasty thoughts at bay until she could phrase them politely. She set the mug down on a side table, so steady it hardly made a sound, and pulled her shaking hoof away from its grasp. “I haven’t given up on her yet,” she growled, “But I don’t want to keep my hopes up too much. If she dies...” Warm feathers settled over her withers. She shrugged them off, annoyed. Somepony like her didn’t deserve support right now. Not after what she’d let happen.

“Bloom, we’ve talked about this,” Twilight pleaded. “It’s not your fault this happened, alright? Please try to believe it?”

Apple Bloom snorted. “Isn’t my fault, huh?” Bitter laughter boiled up from her numb chest and soured the air around her. “I don’t even know why it mattered, now. Don’t even know why it was such a big deal in the first place.” She looks back at Twilight now, at her endlessly compassionate eyes and sad smile,
TIME LIMIT--------------
and takes a painful gasp of air. This room is too small, to empty, too full of the beeps and hisses and Applejack’s sleeping face, and she can’t stand another second of it. “So we had an argument, right? Funds were tight, I have to defer at least a semester before going off to Fillydelphia. And all I can think of to do is go skulk in that rotten deathtrap of a barn? I’m not ready to go off to college, if that’s how I handle things. I’m not ready to be an adult, I’m not ready to... to lose her, but I can’t do anything. I fix things, Twilight. That’s what I’m meant to do, but... I can’t fix this. All I can do is wait.”

“Wait for what?” Twilight’s eyes have no trace of judgement, of hatred, of disappointment. It would be easier if they did.

“Forgiveness,” Apple Bloom whispers, hating the way her head sinks down and her shoulders shake.

Twilight’s wing is back over her, providing the comfort Apple Bloom so desperately craves right now. She lets it stay this time, at least for a little while. "You know that Applejack..." Twilight trails off, uncomfortable.

“I know,” She murmurs. Even when the rotten floor buckled beneath her, even as she lost the fight to gravity and landed hard on the packed dirt two floors below as Apple Bloom sat frozen in shock, even as she cried out in shock and surprise and fear, Applejack’s bright, clear green eyes had only held love for her, love and acceptance and apology. She knew Applejack would go on and on about how there was nothing to forgive in the first place, how they should’ve torn down the barn months before some hormonal, pouty brat could hide away in the loft.

“I know she would, Twilight. S’not her I’m waiting on.” Silence stretched between them in that awful white room with its awful green curtains. There was nothing to do but wait, and count out the minutes in her sister’s heartbeats.

Author's Note:

Prompt 297: Applejack falls

I continue to be mean to the Apple Family, it seems. I think it's a thing that happens when I'm sleep-deprived.

Comments

[DarkwingSnark]

Read this earlier, but just getting to commenting on it now.

Once again, your handymare head canon pops up. You know...now I can't unsee it. It's hard to imagine Apple Bloom as anything else. If you don't mind...is it okay if I use this idea? Not sure how to use it yet, but I'm sure I can think of something.

Also I really enjoy moments between Apple Bloom and AJ's potential mate. It just really says a lot, since Applejack is very close to her family. Granted, this one is more on the depressing side...but it's beautiful in it's own way.

[Midnight herald]

2398936 Feel free to borrow anything you see here for your own use. I encourage and shamelessly participate in the freedom of most intellectual properties, so long as I get royalties for the stuff I copyright (music, not this). It's art, baby! Take what you like and run with it!

I didn't mean for this one to come across as a TwiJack, but if it did I won't complain (Ponies should be in lurve). I think one of the reasons I TwiJack ships and ransom them is because Twilight and Applejack are the two who seem to make decisions for the group in senseitive situations - AJ led the other elements out so Twi could focus in Return of Harmony, AJ was the first pony Twi un-Discorded, AJ went to Twi for help with the Cutie Pox, etc.

So it makes sense in my head that Apple Bloom would go to Twilight for help with Applejack, since the two of them are Ponyville's major crisis-handlers. Glad you liked it, and thanks again for the comments.