Timed Ramblings

by Midnight herald

Way Station

Lemme guess here... You screwed up real bad and your special somepony won't look you in the eye, right? And when they do, you can't stand it. They've got that look in their eyes, that hateful, sad look. How do I know? Cause I know that face you're making. I've made it a lot myself, through the years.

And you're chasing the wrong cloud if you want me to tell you everything gets better, that it all goes away. That look in their eyes never leaves you, lady. It may leave their eyes, they may forgive you, but you're scarred. Marked. That look will never leave you, and you will never forgive yourself. Not all the way.

You'll probably be careful about it all, but the moment you slip, they'll find out. Broken trust is hard to rebuild, and the guilt of everything will drive you halfway insane sometimes. And with every hug, every hello, every 'I love you' you'll bee on watch for that look, checking to see if they believe you. To see if they're disgusted at you. No, lady, it never goes away. But it gets better.

Now, I'm guessing it had to be real bad, 'cause I can't think of any good reason a nice mare like yourself would be trying to catch the 1:00 redeye outta 'Filly. And I'm gonna tell you right now to take your bags and turn around while you still can. Don't give me that look, lady. Do you know what 'forgive and forget' is all about? Yeah, I agree that's a load of bullcrap. Scratch the forget part. If your stallion or mare really loves you, you'll get a second chance. It won't be easy, it won't be pretty, and there'll be a lot of venom and a whole world of hurt to go through. But it'll be worth it in the end if you push through. If you dust yourself off and try again, the real magic can happen.

If you turn around and face up to whatever it is you've done, you apologize and all, you have a chance. You might scream, you'll probably shout, you'll cry, you'll kick something, and with all good luck, you'll kiss and make up. Now, you remember what I said about those eyes, that look? It'll haunt you for years, but not all ghosts are bad.

I'll be the first to admit I'm not the best of mares, and I certainly can't get on my high horse about anything. I lost that right years ago. If you read tabloids, you've probably seen that. And when I'm out on business or I have a long tour, things'll start happening that are bad, things I know I shouldn't be doing. And I almost let them. I'm drawn to the idea of corruptness, for doing exactly what I shouldn't, of feeling the old thrill of taboo. My whole body starts clamoring for it, fighting over right and wrong. But then I think of her eyes and that disappointed look, and everything goes away.

I think of her heartbroken pity and shame and hurt, and I know right away what I should be doing, where I should be to make sure it never happens again.

You have a chance to make this work. And that's the best thing in the world. Maybe it won't work out, but you should at least try. If you run now, you'll be running whenever there's trouble. Don't do that. Don't make my mistake.

Author's Note:

The Prompt: "The look in their eyes never leaves you."

This one came across much more clearly in my head than it did upon writing it, and I was pushing it in the direction of the Twinyl continuity I have simmering on backburner. Looking back, it's much too unclear for that and stands much better on its own.

Comments

[Silvernis]

I dunno, the bit about being on tour definitely suggested Vinyl to me. What exactly happened between Twi and her isn't clear, but it doesn't need to be -- this punches plenty hard as is.

[DarkwingSnark]

I had a feeling it related to Vinyle while reading...but I wasn't completely sure till the end. But I think you are right. It stands alone on its own.