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Let's Talk

Let's Talk

____________________________________________________________________

There's noise from the party outside. To my left, I see enormous forms dancing, chatting, eating near the giant doors leading inside. This is where all the dragons too large for the inside are hanging out, though I spot some smaller drakes dotted around the place too. But right now, I could not want to socialize less, so I turn my back to the partiers and start circling the tree, until the lights of the party are dim enough for the moon to be my main source of illumination. Then I turn away from the library and start walking. I don't want to leave, but I can't see Rarity again. Not after that nightmare.

Why's it a nightmare, though? my mind asks me. You kissed her.

Yeah, but I shouldn't have. I'm just leading her on.

What makes you say that?

What if I have to leave?

What if you don't?

I stop, too lost in thought to move anymore. The chance of being in a relationship with Rarity is staring me in the face, and I'm thinking of throwing it away? Buck no!

I turn back to the library.

Oh, but wait! You're stealing her from Spike, the one who's been trying for years to win her heart. Could you even be such a dick to yourself? Is it worth it?

I turn back towards town.

Oh yes it is. That little colt has had years, and he's never done anything to get her to notice him. He's had his chance: now take yours.

Library.

Oh, but wait! What happens when you leave, hmm? Are you going to leave the love of your life heartbroken, or set her up so that she'll be as happy as possible when you go?

Why do I have to go?!?

I'm lost in a galaxy of questions that have no answers. In a rage, I slam my fist into a tree that snaps like a twig. I stare at my unscathed knuckles and wonder how hard I'd have to hit something to cut through my scales. I'm about to try the broken tree trunk when I hear somedragin speak behind me.

"Nice right hook."

Raspy, high pitch. Sounds like her voice hasn't changed just yet. Lots of ego piled into the remnants of a Cloudsdalian accent (though I doubt that's what it's called here). Of course I meet her like this.

"Who are you?" I ask. Let's get the name thing over with.

Unfortunately, I don't get one from her. "I'm a friend of Pinkie's. You're Emerald, right?"

"Mm."

"I'll take that as a 'yes.'" Something large shifts behind me. I recall Rarity's description of her size, and the thought of the giant behind me almost makes me shiver. Out of the corner of my eye, I see multi-colored spines. She's put her head right next to me.

"Y'know, it's kinda weird to run out on your own welcome party."

"Yeah, well, I didn't ask for it."

"Huh. You don't sound like the drake Pinkie described."

"Sorry to disappoint. I've had a rough night."

"Oh really? How does a party turn into a rough night?"

I grit my teeth and consider the consequences of telling her about Rarity. But there's too much in my head already. I need to let some out.

"There's this girl, alright?"

"Ah. Rarity, huh?"

"How-"

"Pinkie told me. Continue." She hasn't moved from her spot next to me.

"Fine. I--I'm in love with her. Rarity. Simple as that."

"Really? After a day and a half? You sound more like Spike to me."

You don't know the half of it. "Yeah, well, he's a problem. But this isn't about him. We talked, just now at the party, and I asked her to the Summer Sun Celebration. She said yes."

"And that ruined the night?"

"Kind of, yes." I grip the tree tightly, ignoring the splinters of wood pressing into my palm. "I...don't think I'm right for her."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, have you seen her? She's the most amazing dragoness I've ever seen. Beautiful, smart, resourceful, generous...and I'm just me."

I hear her shift behind me. There's a sound like the pounding of hooves on dirt. She's tapping her fingers against the ground.

"Listen, bud, I'm no relationship counselor. In fact, you probably have just opened up to the worst dragin in town to talk to about this kind of crap."

"Well, thanks for listening." I use that as an excuse to try and head towards town again. An enormous tail blocks me off three steps into my journey.

"I'm not finished. I'm the worst dragin to go to about these things, but even I know that you can't be sure of something until it's happened. It's one of the laws of trying."

"The laws of what?"

"It's just a name I made up. The simple version says that you can't know how something will happen until it happens. It's one of the rules I go by whenever I practice new tricks."

"Mm."

"You think you can't make Rarity happy. What if you can? What if you're her soulmate, and by leaving this party, you're condemning both her and yourself to a lifetime of unhappiness? If you really like her, then you should give it a go, whether or not you think it'll work out. Otherwise, you're just being a pussy."

I can't help it: when she says "pussy," I burst out laughing. I can almost feel her smirking behind me. She shifts, and I hear huge wings beating. I wonder how she snuck up on me earlier.

"I can see I've helped you out. I'll see you back at the party." Great gusts of wind push me down to the ground, and when I get back up I can spot a huge dark shape moving swiftly towards the library. That dragon just gave me the best advice I've gotten since I came to this crazy town. Suddenly, I don't care anymore if I'll have to leave. I want to be happy now.

"Thanks, Rainbow Dash," I mutter, and start strolling confidently towards the library.

____________________________________________________________________

The moment I step back inside, Twilight appears from somewhere out of sight and pulls me to a corner of the room. Her look tells me all I need to know.

"You were the one spying on us at the balcony."

She nods, and taps her foot like she's expecting an apology.

"What?"

She raises an eyebrow. "Why did Rarity leave looking worried? From what I saw before you looked over, you two seemed to be hitting it off nicely. What did you do?"

"Nothing, I swear! We talked, I asked her to the Summer Sun Celebration, and then..." I trail off. I don't want to tell her what happened next. Unfortunately, she won't drop it.

"And then?"

"...I sort of kissed her. On the lips."

Twilight's eyes widen. She looks around like somedragon might be listening in on us, and leans in close.

"Did you talk to Spike?"

"Uh...yes?" Not a good enough answer. Twilight sighs in frustration and pulls away, staring up at the ceiling blankly.

"That's why he was gone all day today. He was probably following you to Rarity's."

What? "Come again?"

I get an annoyed look from the lavender dragoness. "He's been down ever since that little coffee incident yesterday, and now I know why. He's been obsessing over your crush on Rarity."

"Uh, yeah? And?"

She comes in close again. I smell apple cider on her breath. "Spike's been in love with Rarity since he first laid eyes upon her. And I'm not talking schoolboy crush: he's actually, truly in love with her. Seeing you with her must be tearing him up." She sighs dejectedly. "I've been dreading this moment for a while."

"What do you mean?"

She laughs lightly, a laugh I've come to know as her "Oh Honey" laugh, and gives me the accompanying "Oh Honey" look. "Emerald, I don't mean to be rude, but have you noticed that Spike is...different than us?"

Uh oh. I know where this is going. I've had this talk before, and it didn't end well then. I respond a little snappily: "Yes, actually, I have. What's your point?"

Another sigh. "Spike's a unicorn, Emerald. As in, a different species than dragons. He needs to find another unicorn, not chase around a dragin he can never have. It's not healthy for him."

Oh, that bitch! She's using the same exact words that she did last time, hold the sugarcoating and everything! "What makes you think he can never have her?"

Now I get an odd look. "You sound as though you want him to."

I do! "I don't. But I think that, if I weren't in the picture, he would have as good a shot as anydragon at getting her. In fact, judging by how friendly they seem to act around each other, it's almost as if they're a couple already."

She smiles an "Oh Honey" smile. "It's sweet that you think that, but really; consider the facts: there's barely any knowledge on unicorns, or any type of pony, for that matter, in the entire kingdom. We don't know how long he'll live, but I don't think it'll be as long as a dragon. That would complicate things."

I lean against a table: she's listing facts, so I'm in for a long one.

"Secondly, Rarity isn't the type of dragin who would be open to just any kind of relationship: despite being the wonderful friend she is, she's still got an enormous list of standards that she wants to uphold. It's more important to her than anything else to be seen as the 'type of dragon everydragon should know.' Now, let's hypothesize for a second: what would happen if this dragin of dragins were to be seen cavorting with some weird horse creature?"

My eye is twitching involuntarily. Something about what she's just said rings in my head like a bell. I grasp for it, but there's no time to remember it before Twilight starts talking again.

"Stumped? The answer isn't too hard to guess: it would destroy her credibility. As much as I hate to admit it, most of the dragons in the crowd Rarity wants to impress aren't as loving and accepting as the ones here in Dragonsville. She would be embarrassed around him, if she even wants to give a relationship a go at all."

She means to go on, but the sound of splintering wood stops her. I look down at my hand to see that my claws have pierced through the table I was leaning on. Twilight stares in amazement at it. Slowly, I drag my hand away, leaving behind four splintery holes in the table that I'm sure Twilight can fix with her magic. I look her in the eye, and her violet irises widen; no doubt she can see how angry I am right now.

"E-Emerald? Are you okay?"

I move the hand that now has shards of wood in its scales up to my face and rub my eyes.

"No. No, I'm not." I move my hand away and give her a tired look. "Look, I don't want to deal with this right now. I'm at a party held in my honor: I've never really gotten that before. Instead of all of this drama, maybe we can just enjoy ourselves? There'll be plenty of time to be mopey and depressed later."

Thankfully, she sees the wisdom in my words and nods, smiling a little.

"That sounds nice, Emerald." She takes my hand and pulls me back towards the madness of the main party. "Come on, you have to try Applejack's Apple Family Cider. It's great with the ruby tarts."

____________________________________________________________________

The Apple Family Cider is better than Twilight says, and time melts as the party goes on. I dance with Twilight, Pinkie, Fluttershy (I think), and countless dragons whose names I couldn't remember from Ponyville (or can't remember now). The DJ (P0N-3 becomes DR4G-N, geddit?) has the best music I've ever heard, and she proves one of the many theories I've made during my years in Ponyville: claws make DJ-ing soooooo much better.

"Well, duh!" the DJ (who's real name is Vinyl) says when I ask her about it (glass 3 of Apple Family Cider in my hand) while she's on her break. "What else would a dragon use to scratch with, man?" We get acquainted, and I find out we have a lot in common. Two glasses later, on her next break, she pulls me over to the nearest corner and attacks my lips hungrily. All of my guilt is washed away by the combination of my sixth glass of cider and the tingle I get every time she digs her claws into my back. Stupidly, I ask her what just happened. She just laughs and kisses me again. I love the taste of blue raspberries. I try to tell her I already have a mate, and again she laughs.

"Dude, have you ever had a one night stand?" I shake my head, and she laughs more. I must be a comedian or something. We make out for another minute before she needs to go back onstage. I go for another drink. At the cider barrel (that should be a bar name!) I meet the orange dragin from the telescope room, pouring two mugs of cider nonchalantly. I assume the other one's for the gray drake she was with in there. Maybe he's still in there, waiting for the cider to give them a recharge before they go at each other's throats again.

"Are you old enough to drink hard cider?" This question may be very stupid, as I have never known the drinking age for dragons (why make one, when there's only one dragon in Ponyville? Let him have booze, they say!) or whether or not there is one. The orange dragin faces me, tosses a few limp magenta spines out of her eyes with a flick of her head, and gives me a distasteful look.

"Do I know you?"

"Now you do." I hold out a hand for her to shake while the other takes another glass of cider (that's 9), and the dragin shakes it hesitantly as I introduce myself. "Emerald Spires. Nice to meet you."

"Oh, so you're the one this party's for." The way she says that sounds almost insulting, and she's looking at me like I've just told a bad joke that took her a while to get. "Well, thanks, 'Emerald.' I'm glad I got to go to this party: more time with my drakefriend." She winks when she says my name. I'm confused (and getting kind of drunk).

"What's with the air quotes?"

"What?"

"When you said my name, it sounded like you thought it was a joke or something."

She smiles at me. "Oh, come on, Spike, I know it's you! I mean, nobody in town has eyes like that!" Was that a compliment?

"Er, that's because I'm from out of town: this is my Welcome to Dragonsville party."

She giggles cutely and rolls her eyes. "Riiiight. Well, I'm Scootaloo, in case I forgot to mention." She turns to leave, fluttering a pair of slightly undersized wings in my face. I sneeze, and when I'm done wiping my nose she's heading towards the stairs. "I'll see ya around, 'Emerald,'" she calls back to me, before she goes trotting up the stairs to meet her awaiting drakefriend. I chug the glass of cider in my hand, the world spins a while, and I fetch another fill-up (#10, and still going strong).

In a blur of hours and countless glasses, the night slips away, and suddenly the library's only half-packed with dragons. I'm having a partially-understandable conversation with the cider barrel when Scootaloo and her drakefriend (who came down earlier, around glass 14, and is called Rumble) come stumbling down the stairs, partially drunk, partially giddy with what I don't have to guess is something close to nymphomania (in Scootaloo's case, anyway). They tumble out the door, sloppily making out the way only intoxicated creatures can. More dragons leave, and suddenly the library's only a quarter-packed. Big Mac and AJ leave, though the giggly Cheerilee and Fluttershy trailing behind them as they exit via the Giant's Door (as I've so brilliantly named it) suggests that the party is far from over for them. Soon it's only me, DJ DR4G-N, Pinkie, and Twilight. Then, sadly, the DJ must leave as well; final drink tally: bleventeen.

"Aaaaaand, that's all, folks!" The dragin at the turntables still acts like the library's full, and gives what seems to be a scripted goodbye. Then, with a shimmer of blue magic, the tables fold themselves up into a suitcase (somehow), and DJ DR4G-N steps off of her stage and trots over to Pinkie, who is still dancing to a song that ended half a minute ago.

"So, my payment's gonna be-"

Pinkie burps noisily in the DJ's face, and a spout of gems somehow fly from her maw. The dragin scrunches her muzzle cutely, grossed out, but accepts the payment regardless and leaves with the gems floating behind her. She gives me a wink as she passes, and her claw slides down the length of my tail, which stiffens against my will. I hear her giggle as the door opens and shuts. I don't understand why she would do something like that. Pinkie continues to dance like there's still music playing, and I, woozy from the cider and still a bit tail-stiff, stumble over to the stairs. I really need to go to bed, before I do anything else stupid. Unfortunately, somedragon decided to mess with the stairs so that they're not all evenly spaced, so I go tumbling down head over heel. It doesn't hurt that much: it's more of a dull ache. I get back up and try to face my bed, but I keep spinning, along with the rest of the room. It's really funny, for some reason, so I start laughing to myself, then to the room, and then I try to laugh all the way up to Twilight and Pinkie, but there's no answer, so I just keep laughing. Finally, I manage to stop spinning, and I try to stand as still as possible while I wait for the room to stop, too. I shut my eyes because I'm getting dizzy, and that's when I hear somedragon crying. I stumble towards the sound, off in the corner furthest from the messed up staircase, and when I push aside a plant that's in the way, I'm staring at Spike. He's holding his face in his hooves, and when he looks up and sees that I've found him moping, he gets angry.

"Oh shit," he sobs, and wipes away as much of his tears as he can. More take their places in a few seconds. "What the buck are you doing here?" Except he didn't say buck.

"I have to sleep here, man. You know that, you made the room up for me-" I'm silenced by a hoof in my gut. The cider still has me in its grip, so I trip and fall on my back. A shadow looms over me, and I hear a very dangerous jumble of words through the haze that's growing in my head.

"...could kill you...years and years....stupid drake to...loved her so much."

I shake my head, and it clears enough to hear all words again. I sit up, and my head bonks Spike's (thankfully not on the horn). We back away from each other, and he looks like he might just kill me here and now. But why, I ask him, is he so mad at me?

He yells, and my head throbs. "Why do you think?!? What did we have a conversation about this morning, huh?!?" I don't know, so I guess pancakes, because I remember there being pancakes at breakfast this morning. He looks madder now, somehow. "Celestia, you are drunk off your ass right now, aren't you?" Where did he learn such language? "How is it that ten years of chasing after Rarity gets me nowhere, and yet a drunken douche like you can come along and sweep her off her feet in a day?"

"It's cuz I'm a dragon, and yer not!" Did I yell that? Spike glares at me, and I think he's about to actually kill me. So I make my last words as memorable as possible: "An' I wasn't drunk when I took her from ya!" Sparks fly from his horn (isn't that a sign of arousal, though?), and I give him my biggest smile, despite the feeling that I might wet myself out of fear of death (I think I already have, maybe). Then, for some reason, he gets all sad, and he slumps to the floor like he's just killed himself (ha, geddit?).

"You're right. It never could have worked." He sighs really big. "Who ever heard of a pony and a dragon together?"

I have! "Hey! Don't talk like that! I know plenty of dragon-pony couples!" Wait, no I don't.

"You do?" Oh no, why did I say that?

"Um, no, not really. But I know one, for sure!" Kinda.

"Really." He doesn't sound like he believes me.

"Yuh-huh. Let Uncle Spike tell you a story."

"I'm Spike."

"I know, I know." What was my name again? I sit up and lean against a bookshelf. "Now, this is a story about a drake and a mare. They live in this place called Ponyville, where everypony's a pony, and there's only one dragon."

Spike laughs. "You're drunker than I thought."

No, he has to listen! This is important! "No, iz true! I'm from there!"

"You said there was only one dragon."

"Yeah, thas me!"

"So, you're from a town called Ponyville, where you're the only one of your species."

"Yuh-huh. And there's this mare, right? And she's totally awesome, like, eleven out of ten. She's beautiful, smart, funny, beautiful, fashionable, and a unicorn. Guess what her name is."

"Uh, Perfection?"

"Nuh-uh. S'Rarity."

Now he's not smiling. He looks angry. Better tell the rest of the story. "So, Spike, thas me, remember, he's trying to get Rarity to like him, cuz he looooooooves her. But iz like she doesn't even know he's in love with her. But he still tries to win her heart, cuz there's nopony else for him. An' this one time, he turns into a monster, and she saves him with this Fire Ruby that he gave her for a present, and they're falling through the air and he almost tells her but she stops him with her hoof and I think she was crying or maybe it was just the wind blowing in her face. Anyways, they get rescued by the Wonderbolts and she gives him a kiss on the cheek at a bridge and thas it for a while. She goes back to pretending not to notice how much he loves her and iz like nothing even happened! I mean, she doesn't even wear the Fire Ruby anymore! Thas weird, right?"

He's not angry anymore, which is good, but he looks scared. Like I told him his future, or something. He nods, and I go on: "Yeah, iz weird. So, anyway, they stay friends, or something like that, and years and years and years pass, until he's known her for, like a decade, and she still doesn't do anything about his moves on her! Iz like, get a clue, or something? But he's alright with that, cuz he can wait longer than forever, like, five-ever, and he loves her so much he'll do anything for her. Know how that feels, man?"

Another nod. He's kinda pale-looking now, but I think he's alright. "Well, one day, he wakes up in this forest, and he walks into this town that he thinks is Ponyville, but iz not, cuz everypony's a dragon there, only they're the dragon versions of the ponies he knows. So he gets all freaked out at first, and then he gets cool with it, like, 'Yeah, I get it, man. Just go with the flow," and nopony recognizes him because apparently the drake with purple scales and green spines and emerald eyes doesn't look anything like that unicorn with purple fur and a green mane and emerald eyes working at the library with Twilight Sparkle, so he fakes his name and meets all his friends as dragons, and he meets himself as a unicorn, and its sooooo cool! Oh, but then the best part happens! Guess what it is?"

He's looking into space now, but he stills answers me: "Rarity."

"Thas right! He meets the mare he's loved all his life as a dragon, and all he can think about's getting some of that tail, f'you know wha'mean. And it turns out that this Rarity likes him back, so everything's totally awesome, except that the unicorn threatens to kill him, but thas okay cuz I know he's bluffing maybe, and besides he's gonna go to the Summer Sun Celebration with her and they're gonna be together five-ever, like he said he would, and maybe he could find a way to get the pony-Rarity and the pony-him all hooked up, so everypony's happy!" My tale's finished, and Spike's in awe: he is literally rendered speechless by the sheer amazingness of my speech.

"So you see, man," I finish proudly. "Thas where hatchlings come from."

He stares at me, mouth gaping open. I think he might kiss me, but he looks too amazed to do that. He gets up really slowly, and goes over to the stairs, leaving me by myself at the bookshelf. I say goodbye, then remember that something's gone terribly wrong.

"Hey, watch out fer the stairs! Somepony messed with them, and now they're all crooked and uneven and stuff!" I don't think he heard me. He's gone. I hope he doesn't fall and hurt himself. I like that guy; he reminds me of myself.

"Welp, Spike," I tell myself, "Time for bed." I get up, fall, get up again, and trudge over to the bed. On the way, I feel a belch coming on, and when I let it rip, a piece of paper comes out. I don't wanna lose my stuff, so I pick it up and check it for tears.

Two Weeks

What's that mean? Do I have to do something in two weeks? Did I forget about another doctor's appointment? Whatever; everything'll make sense in the morning. I've gotta tell Twilight about the broken stairs, too. Don't forget.

I fall onto my bed and hold the paper against my chest as sleep claims me. It's like my first blanket, kinda: just a lot smaller, and browner, and papery, and not really a blanket. Oh well. Can't have everything.

Author's Note:

Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeext!!!!!!!!!!!

Flashbacks! Eavesdropping! The letter "D!" Ice Water! Hangovers! LOUD NOISE! Dealing in Interdimensional Trades! Fresh Fruit! Clues! All this except probably one or two things, waiting in the next chapter, which won't take a month to show up, because, one more time,

-NotARealPonydotcom

P.S. No, that thing with DJ DR4G-N doesn't mean anything. I was bored.

P.P.S. Pst! Check this out! I made this while I was gone!

P.P.P.S LINKS. ARE. FUN!

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Path_of_cloud

Path_of_cloud #1 · Apr 14th, 2013 · 3 · ·

And it is Legen... wait for it... dary!

Visuality

Visuality #2 · Apr 14th, 2013 · · ·

I loved this story along with another called Fillyswap, which hasn't updated in a long time like this one. It's not everyday these kind of dragon stories. Keep it up! P.S. MORE RAINBOW DASH!