Long, Sad Farewells, Full of Heavy Sighs and Short Waves
Long, Sad Farewells, Full of Heavy Sighs and Short Waves
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"Will you tell me your name? Your real one?"
"...Yes. But not now. When I leave."
"..."
"I know you're sick of the lies. So am I. But please, please, please let me be Emerald for a little while longer. He makes you so much happier than I ever could."
"..."
"...Please?"
"...Alright... Emerald..."
"Thank you, Rarity. And I promise I'll tell you-mmph."
"Mmm..."
"..."
"...I heard you the first time, darling."
"...That's very nice lipstick you're wearing."
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One of the first phrases I learned when I was a hatchling was "time flies when you're having fun." I heard this from Twilight plenty of times, most often at the times when she would look up from a new book and notice that several hours had passed without her knowledge. I didn't really understand it at first, mostly because I didn't get what was so "fun" about reading without moving an inch for half a day. When I finally had the phrase explained to me by (guess who) the very mare who had made it confusing for me in the first place, I ended up even more perplexed, since it didn't occur to me that Twilight truly loved reading and learning. It just seemed to me that she spent all her time doing it because she needed to make sure that Princess Celestia was pleased with her work. I've since learned that "time flies when you're having fun" isn't really the best way to put it; it's more like, "time flies when you want it to last."
I bring this up because once Rarity comes around, the day slips away. I feel déjà vu and don't care, because a miracle has happened and I'm with her again. I'm hardly aware of where we go or what we do; it doesn't matter, so long as she can be by my side and not hate me for what I've done. I keep expecting the walls of reality to fall apart and reveal the blue-and-gray landscape of the dream world, but they never do. There's no Luna, no bad memories, none of it. This day is simply for her and me, and only when the sun has set and she gives me a gentle kiss good night does the euphoria that has blanketed me starts to fade. I hadn't even noticed that the day ended; but then, time flies when you want it to last.
Walking back from Rarity's boutique ("I'm afraid I still have some picking up to do in here, darling," she explained politely when I asked to come in), the numbing giddiness pumping through my veins lightens up enough for me to think properly. Slowly but surely, the past twenty-four hours plays back through my head, and I think over what a difference that twenty-four hours has made. I think over how awful I'd been feeling just this morning, sitting at the breakfast table and munching somberly on toast. I think of how Spike has helped me, even after everything I've done to him. I think of Twilight and Pinkie Pie, who've both been such great supports in the past two weeks. Well, it was mostly Pinkie; Twilight had her own fish to—
I stop just a block away from my destination. I can see the library's glowing windows through the dark, but I'm not really looking at them.
Twilight told me—
I'm moving again, at almost a run now. The joy and dreamy happiness that was overwhelming me not even a minute ago has all but vanished, leaving in it's place a few choice bad memories that part of me would feel fine not remembering. The rest of me, however, is all too grateful to have remembered them, and now all I can see ahead of me is my bed, and all I can hear are the same words, echoing in my head like an anthem:
I refuse to let history repeat itself...
From the back of my mind, something big and angry roars back at it:
Liar!
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The more dreams I have, the more they all look real to me. What started out as a mind-bending drift through an eternally blue ocean has turned into something that looks like one of those awesome daydreams I used to have as a kid.
It starts in the middle of a hallway, one very much like the path to the Throne Room in the Canterlot Castle. Only this hall is far more enormous than the one back in Equestria. Its ceiling is hardly visible from hundreds (thousands?) of feet above me, and the ends of it appear to be nonexistent. The crimson carpet under my feet doesn't feel like fabric, but like my own skin—scaly, smooth, and just a little slippery. On either side of me are huge windows of stained glass, similar in many ways to the ones that depict all of the adventures the girls and I have been on back home. These windows, however, show me something a little different. It's the same image, over and over again, and it's far less cheerful than the window that tells the story of my daring rescue of the Crystal Heart. Each time I look at one of these dream windows, the echo of a voice I've been hearing a lot from lately whispers in my head:
She told me she was ready...
The glass shows me burning houses, burning pastures, burning trees. The red glow of the all-consuming flames is cast upon the ground, radiating like a small sun. The pieces of the hall caught in this light look as though they themselves are burning, right along with those poor, wooden shacks depicted in the glass.
Haystone was not the only thing destroyed that day...
The sides of the window are embroidered with patterns of smog and ash. The burning red floor of the hall is surrounded by an ugly and dull gray ring. The remains of a forest lie in the corner of the glass, charred black and lifeless. This bit of the window does not, in fact, cast a colored swatch down upon the hallway's carpeting.
The dragon's name was Rose...
Above the smoke and flame, an enormous winged beast twists and roars in midair. She's burning like the fire, with yellow eyes that glint with madness and rage. I feel small, staring up at her stained glass image. From her jaws comes a ruby-shaded fire that no doubt has brought about the scene she hovers above. Her massive form fills the sky, turning it blood red with her scales. The sun is all but hidden behind her massive head, its golden rays just barely poking out to cast a faint, six-pointed glow on the hallway floor.
I refuse to let history repeat itself...
In the foreground of the dead forest, standing out like a sore thumb amongst the reds and oranges and greys, is a midnight blue smudge in the shape of a pony. She looks so tiny, in comparison to the great dragon above her. So weak.
I feel a rumble and tear my eyes away from the glass. Something in the hallway is moving.
From far beyond my line of sight, the ends of the hall twitch and move inward. I watch them rush right at me, and perhaps I should feel panic, but I don't. Instead, all I can think of is that little blue pony, standing small against the godly beast she once called her friend.
You must understand the dangers of being in love with a pony, Spike...
Without thinking twice, I raise my arms up, pointing one at each of the walls headed for me. Immediately, they stop.
Enough of this. I have business to attend to.
Through the exit that has been so kind as to move close enough for me to reach I find a room that's quite different than the hall. It's gray and made of stone, and looks something like the catacombs of the Crystal Palace without all that dark Sombra magic floating around. To my left is a stone staircase that rises into the seemingly infinite blackness hanging above my head. It looks a bit intimidating (and endless), so I take the door to my right, stepping out into the same exact hallway I had just left. I stride over to the other end of it (doing my best to avoid looking at the windows) and exit through a door identical to the first one, only to find myself back in the stone room. Stepping over to the door on the right once again, I find myself looking into the same hallway with the same carpet and the same stained glass windows. Again. So it looks like the endless staircase is my only way out of this place. Better than endless stained glass windows, I guess.
The first minute of climbing is uneventful and slow, even though I'm running up the stairs. The further up I go, however, the less and less I can see. This becomes very troublesome after a while, since there are no railings for these stairs and I really really really don't want to fall to my death anytime soon. So I try and hug the wall as I ascend through the darkness, but even that becomes difficult to do, as it seems the wall is beginning to cease to exist. My claws slip against gaps in the stone, and from what I gather sticking my arm all the way in one of these odd holes, there's nothing on the other side of the wall. So I just keeping going, staring down at my feet in an effort to see them, which becomes difficult in itself after another minute because my sense of direction suddenly evaporates and leaves me wondering if I'm looking down at all. The stairs go from feeling rough and cold to silky and warm, now carpeted with my-mother-knows-what. More than once, I slip up and almost fall over, which turns my quick ascension into a slow, steady effort to keep going and not fall and plummet and die. The air grows warm and sticky, making it an unpleasant experience just to breathe. I find myself wishing I had just kept going around that loop, trying to find another way out. Perhaps I'd just gone through those infinite doors the wrong way; surely reversing my direction of travel would solve everything. If I could just turn around without slipping, then maybe I can head back down and try—
My foot passes through empty air where another stair should be. In a split second, I'm plummeting downwards.
The overwhelming fear that I get whenever I start to fall threatens to drown me. I manage something like a gurgle of terror before the falling truly begins and supersaturates that fear with exhilaration. My arms reach out and flail, wishing for something to grab onto and never ever let go. There's nothing there; there's nothing anywhere anymore. It's all just darkness and that sour air, still warm even when it's rushing up past me. My eyes are wide open, trying to find some speck of light to register, anything at all, but they begin to burn thanks to the stinging wind in them. I have to shut them, and I go back to flailing my arms for a minute while I wait for the burning to pass. When it does and I open my eyes again, I'm greeted by something more than complete darkness.
In the distance, a golden spark winks at me.
I'm not falling anymore. I'm just floating now, hovering in the inky blackness. Or maybe I am still falling and there's just no more wind to tell me which way my body's moving. I'm not sure. I stare at the spark, thinking it's the bottom of the staircase and that I can just drift on down to it so I can get back to that hall with the stained glass. Then I remember that there was never any staircase, and that the hallway and the windows were all just a dream, and that this is what I'd always been doing, just floating here and waiting for the spark to arrive so that I might get the chance to see it. And here it is, right in front of me. I just need to drift a little bit closer, and—
"You cannot go that way."
The blue alicorn is just above me, barely visible in the glow of the golden spark. She smiles at me and holds out her hoof. Her mane and tail seem to blend into the blackness, filling it with the twinkling glow of whatever it is her mane and tail are made of.
"Why not?" I ask. I can't remember her name.
"Because," she says, reaching out and grasping my arm, "if you do, then you shall not be able to come back."
She tugs at me, and I float up to her. Putting my arms around her neck, she spreads two magnificent, midnight wings and launches us upward. Beneath me, the spark twinkles, calling for something, or somedragon, or somepony, to come to it. As it slips away into the dark, so too does my vision. The alicorn's coat dims to nothing, and I become blind again. The air is still warm, still sour. The wind is still gone.
The flapping of her wings and the softness of her fur are the only things that tell me I am still here.
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I'm not certain how long it takes, but eventually I'm pulled through two large, wooden doors, out of that nightmarish darkness and into, strangely enough, a bedroom. Landing on the floor without making a sound, I slide slowly off my ride, giving my mind the time it needs to catch up with reality. Or whatever this is.
"Are you alright?" Luna asks.
"Mm-hmm," I moan, pressing my face hard into the floor and gripping the carpet with my claws. Once he spinning stops and my mind dispels the rest of the fog sitting around it, I sit up and take a look around. We're in Luna's bedroom again; those wooden doors she brought me through are those of her closet. From beyond the still-opened doors, the blackness sits. Just looking at it, makes me shiver; I can still feel it creeping over and around me.
"Ah," Luna says, noticing my look. "You'll want this closed, then."
The closet doors glow blue and shut. I keep staring at them, trying to figure out what exactly it was I just experienced. From beside me, Luna begins to walk away, and I turn to her.
"What was that?" I rasp.
"That," she replies, "is where the deepest of sleepers go. I advise you to clear it from your mind. It will only bring you unnecessary troubles, and Sister knows you do not need any more of that."
I get that that's supposed to be her attempt at humor, but having just come out of some sort of in-sleep trance that almost got me... deep-sleeped, or whatever it's supposed to be called, I'm not exactly in a laughing mood. I just continue to stare at the closet.
It seems Luna can tell I'm still troubled by it, because she changes the subject: "Incidentally, it impressed me to see those stained glass windows you dreamt up. You have an excellent memory, and quite a creative imagination."
The stained glass windows.
The dragon's name was Rose
I leap to my feet and spin to face Luna, almost falling over in the process. I step to her, and she backs away as I raise an accusing finger at her.
"Your sister," I growl. "This is all her fault."
"I'm sorry?"
"She's the reason it never worked. She's why Twilight's always just laughed at my feelings, because Twilight has to listen to her, doesn't she?"
"Spike, you must be clearer. I cannot—"
"Your sister has been manipulating Twilight to keep Rarity and me apart!"
Luna is silent, eyes gone wide and jaw slightly ajar.
"Why," she begins, "would she ever—"
"Oh, like you don't know!" I approach her again, and she continues to back away. "Like you don't know what happened the last time a pony and a dragon got together, and how that ended!"
"Spike, you cannot honestly think—"
"But it makes sense, Luna! Why wouldn't she try and stop it from happening again, if last time ended with an annihilated village? Regardless of whether or not I've spent my entire life being raised by and living with ponies, I'm a danger to them all!"
"Spike, please—"
"Forget that my family is all ponies, or that every single friend I've ever had is a pony, or that I've spent most of my life hating myself for being a dragon and not a pony like all of them. Forget all that, because if I get too close to one of them, and she kicks the bucket, it all goes out the window and I turn into a blood-thirsty rampaging monster that sees ponies only as a nice little snack, right? No wonder she wants me kept apart from everypony!"
"You need to stay calm, Spike. You're—"
"And hey, why stop at just Twilight? She's an all-powerful deity, isn't she? She can just manipulate her little subjects into doing whatever she wants, willingly or otherwise. So why not make me the outcast, huh? It explains everything: she made me the butt end of every joke, the cutesy little dragon who's just so funny to watch while he stumbles around and acts all goofy; she made me have to stay and sit around the library all day while all my friends went off and had amazing adventures that I'd always hear about when they made me write their friendship reports later; heck, she's probably the reason I was so bucking stupid back then. She easily could have been dumbing me down so nopony would ever take me seriously, planting idiot ideas in my head so I could get into trouble and look like a toddler trying to be all grown up and fix everything. She put that stupid Dragon Code in my head, made me act like I didn't know what a bucking kitchen was when I tried to help Applejack out, made me think Twilight would replace me with a bucking owl, made me—"
"SPIKE!"
The force of the Royal Canterlot Voice shuts me up and pushes me back. I'm forced to keep myself from falling over by leaning against a nearby wall—a nearby wall that didn't exist a few seconds ago.
"What the..."
We've traded Luna's bedroom for a narrow stone hallway, one that looks like a part of the Canterlot Castle's dungeon that hasn't been touched in years. Damp, mossy stones make up two cracked and ugly walls that stretch endlessly upwards into the darkness that is the ceiling. My tail can't swing back and forth without smacking into said cracked and ugly walls; each time it does, a little part of me fears that I might bring them crashing down on us, they look so unstable. Looking past Luna, I see what made her so determined to keep me from pushing her further back—the floor simply stops, and falls away into a pit as black and endless as the ceiling. Had she taken another step back, Luna would have plummeted.
Looking around, I begin, "How did this—"
"Listen to yourself."
The gust isn't as strong this time, but the Voice still does a fine job of silencing up.
"You sound like a foal. Accusing the leader of Equestria, your own mother, of manipulating your entire life for no other reason than to make you suffer? You are better than that."
She takes a step away from the pit and gives a little cough. When she speaks again, it's in a voice that's at a normal volume:
"What in my Mother's name would make you think this?"
"Funny you should ask that," I growl. "I got the idea from this little story you told me, once upon a dream."
She blanches. I have her caught.
"See," I continue, "I'm not the only one who's heard that story from a princess. Your sister gave Twilight a short history lesson back when dear Twily first told her about my silly little crush. When she heard I was going after a pony's heart, Celestia told Twilight all about that dragoness and her stallion, which got Twilight worrying. So, Twilight started keeping me from getting too close to Rarity, all because she was afraid that I might go off the deep end if anything bad ever happened between Rarity and me. Thanks to your sister, mine has been trying for years to keep me away from the one I love!"
"Spike, you must understand—"
"I understand perfectly, Luna! You two don't trust me enough to act like a civilized creature, so you're both conspiring to keep me separated from the rest of ponykind by reminding them all that I'm different and dangerous!"
"We are not—"
"Don't try and lie to me anymore! I know you're afraid of me, of what I am—"
"And why should we not be!?"
This one catches me by surprise, and sends me tumbling to the grimy floor of the hallway. Luna's eyes shine with white fury, and she steps towards me with her teeth grit.
"After what happened before, why should my sister and I not take the precautions to ensure that our subjects are safe from another attack of that kind?"
Her wings snap open, crackling with white energy, and the walls of the hallway blast outward into the growing darkness. A wind begins to pound my eardrums and burn my eyes. Struggling against it, I can only watch as Luna comes closer. Within her mane, the stars are alight with the fury and power of their mistress. Their light is blinding, and ir forces me to shut and cover my eyes as Luna continues:
"What makes you believe you are above such mortal emotions as sorrow and rage? Do you think you are better than all other dragons, simply because you've been raised differently?"
The wind is defeaning. Above it, I yell, "I know I'm not—"
"If anything, you have proven yourself more dangerous than the dragoness from all those centuries ago, destroying our castle because somepony was rude to you!"
My eyes snap open, despite the raging wind and burning light from Luna's mane. She's standing above me, eyes still aglow, face still twisted with violent resentment. Her limbs are shaking. She stares down at me, teeth grinding together, and all of a sudden her expression changes. It's only slight, the shift in her brow, the curve of her lip, but its enough to warp her look into something completely different. As she does this, I become aware that I'm shaking, too. I think I'm sobbing, but the wind is making it hard to determine what's shaking me and whether or not tears are coming out of my eyes. Then the wind does die down, and I discover that I am indeed starting to sob, because what Luna has just said to me is too true not to hurt. Breathing deep and choking up, I cover my eyes with a claw, trying to control myself. But I can't.
I just can't.
So I lie there and sob, hating Luna and myself and Celestia and that stupid stallion who spat in my face and everypony else in all of Equestria for being right about me. Because I have been the monster: I'm the big bad dragon that destroyed a good chunk of the Canterlot Castle and the lives of a great many ponies in one fell swoop, all because I wanted to be something I wasn't. I'm the one who trashed half of Ponyville one day because I'd gotten too many birthday presents. I'm the monster; Celestia was right to warn Twilight about me.
Something warm drips onto my cheek that isn't from me. I pull away my claw and look up at Luna, who is still gazing down at me and glowing. Her limbs are still shaking, and her teeth are still grit, but the crackling energy in her wings has gone, and the stars in her mane are no longer blinding me. Her chest heaves, and from the white glow in her eyes comes a tear, one that glows just as bright and slides halfway down her cheek before dripping off and falling onto my own. I can feel the warmth radiating from the tear as its glow fades. The glow in Luna's eyes fades, too. Her wings fall to her sides, and she gazes down at me with wide, horrified eyes. She covers her mouth with a hoof, chest heaving again. More tears spill from her eyes, and she shuts them and sits back, biting her hoof in a sad attempt to stop them.
"Luna—" I choke. Swallowing a few times, I say, "Luna, you're right. What I've done is exactly what that dragoness did all those years ago. I should be thanking you and Celestia for trying to stop me. If I'd gone further than the castle—"
And then she's on me, crying. Her forelegs wrap around my chest, and her muzzle buries into my shoulder. Her wings spread out and cover us, mixing the glow of her starry mane with her feathers to tint the world around us midnight blue. I feel a wet spot form where her muzzle presses into my scales.
"I'm sorry!" she shouts into my neck. "What I said was disgraceful and untrue! I was angry, and I wanted to... I wanted to..." She pulls her muzzle out of my neck and looks at me. "I don't want to hurt you."
She's sorry. Even though she's right, she's sorry.
"It's okay, Luna. What you said—"
"—was wrong!" Her hooves grab the sides of my face and pull it close to hers, so close that our noses touch. "You are nothing like the dragoness from before, Spike. You are so much stronger than she ever was. I know you are, and so does my sister. Please understand that everything I said was untrue and only spoken out of anger. I mean none of it, and I am sorry."
"But Luna—"
"Please! You must believe me!"
I stare into her eyes for a long time. They stare back, sparkling and big and blue. Her hooves are still holding my face close to hers.
"Okay," I finally whisper. "I get it. I believe you."
"Thank you," she whispers back. She hugs me again, burying her muzzle back into my shoulder, and this time I return the gesture. Her fur is soft and smooth, and she's very warm. Resting my head against her neck, I feel a sereneness settle over me. Maybe its the scent of her that's doing that: the scent of forest air and forming dew, a scent that reminds me of the nights I spent stargazing with Twilight and the girls up on the hill by the Ponyville River. With my eyes open, I watch her mane flutter in the nonexistent breeze, stars glittering with light. The blue light that envelops us darkens and ripens, blending into a deep violet color that hides the details of her beautiful feathers in shadow. Another smell invades my nostrils: roses. I can feel something new and warm swirling in my gut, pouring outwards until it radiates from my skin. It radiates from Luna, too, floating off her like a warm, rosy mist. It's surrounding us, the source of the tint that turns the world violet, and it's the most wonderful feeling in the world. If only I could always feel this way, with the scent of roses in the air and Luna's wings surrounding me and her breath on my neck...
A voice somewhere in the back of my head tells me something's wrong.
"Luna," I mutter, trying to pull her out of the hug, "what's with this glow? I think I remember it..."
Luna brings herself in front of me, sliding her hooves around my neck. Her eyes are half-open, and I can feel a heaviness on her breath as it brushes my lips.
"Spike..." she breathes, leaning in close. Her hooves guide me forward, and I can feel my head tilt and my eyes shut.
Just as they do, I see Rarity, whispering sweetly to me.
My arms snap forward with a sort of automatic jerk. Gasping, Luna stumbles backwards and lands on her back. Her wings flail open, revealing the rest of the dream world and destroying the violet pocket in which we'd been trapped. The rosy mist surrounding me vanishes, as does the feeling in my gut that came with it. It lingers on Luna for a while, fading at a much slower pace than it did for me. She's covering her face with a wing. I stare at her, and it takes me a moment to realize exactly what it was we almost did just now.
"What in your sister's name was that?!?"
The princess groans, rubbing her face with her hooves, and sits up. When she removes them, her face is flush with embarrassment. She mumbles something about dreams and emotions, tilting her head to the ground.
"What?"
"Our emotions..." she says, louder now. "We let them... grow too much."
"Let them—" I shake my head to clear it. "Let them grow too much?"
Luna nods.
"That's crazy! What emotions?"
"Our..." She winces. "...feelings towards one another."
It takes a moment for that to register. Then I say, "Feelings? I don't have any—"
"We were overcome by our feelings towards—Er, perhaps I should phrase that better—"
"I'd like it if you would."
Oh dear Celestia, what is she saying?
"Luna..." I think I'm gesturing my claws at her. "What does that mean?"
"Nothing, Spike." But she says this looking away, down at the floor.
A floor that is now composed of familiar blue carpet. I look around, and sure enough, we're back in Luna's bedroom. Only this time it's dark. The only source of light in here comes from... candles. Lots and lots of candles.
I can hear my neck creak as I turn my head back to her and say, "Luna... are you telling me..."
She notices her bed (looking oh so comfy and appealing in the light of all those candles), frowns, and looks back at the floor. Her head lowers further, and she murmurs, "Spike, please..."
"...that you, the Princess of the Night herself..."
Her head is so low to the ground now that she almost looks as though she's laying down. She raises a hoof to her cheeks, apparently to try and wipe away her heavy, scarlet blush, and pleads, "Please don't..."
And for a full second, I don't. I just stare at her, feeling puzzle pieces in my head click together in a nice, even fashion. I also realize my hands (which have been extended outwards since I shoved her) and my left eye are twitching violently. Then, despite how outrageous it is to even consider, despite how impossible it is for it to be true, despite how utterly ridiculous it is that she would ever say yes in a billion years, I ask:
"...Luna, are you in love with me?"
My answer is a moan and a sweeping downward motion from her. Her head hits the floor of the room without making a sound, and she covers her face with her front hooves. From what I can see of them, her cheeks are now a shade of maroon I've only ever seen on one of Rarity's magically enhanced dresses. The stars in her mane and tail are rushing around erratically. A moment of pure, frightening silence occurs. Then she sniffles, and raises herself back up onto her haunches. She keeps her eyes shut and her muzzle pointed at the ground. Her blush fades away. The look on her face is one of immense resignation.
"Luna?" My throat begins to feel like it's burning.
A deep, pensive sigh escapes her nostrils, and she says, "Spike, I've come to care very deeply for you, these past few days—"
"Luna, that's ridiculous—"
"And how is it so?" It's not quite the Royal Canterlot Voice, but there's still a small gust of wind I can feel when she bursts out. "How is it ridiculous that I come to care for a creature so loving, so selfless, so... so utterly astonishing?" She swipes at a twinkle in the corner of her eye and, in a much quieter voice, whimpers, "How could I not do so?"
I start to say something, but then I realize where we are: Luna's bedroom. Which is really just a dream of her bedroom. A dream. I say, "Luna, you said that dreams can bring emotions out of whoever's dreaming and make them way more intense than they really are. You might just be—"
"I am the Mistress of the Night, Spike!" she shouts, swiping at her eyes again. "The dreams do not control me! I control them!" Again, in that much quieter voice: "I know what I feel."
I'm silent for a while, and during that silence I discover that it is possible to be tired in a dream; Luna's bed seems to be mocking me from the corner of my eye, enticing me with its dozens of giant, fluffy pillows and its layers of soft, fuzzy blankets. My arms are lowering to my sides. My jaw is doing a poor job of re-hinging itself.
"...How long?" I mutter, once I think of something to say.
"...For nearly a week now."
It takes me a moment to figure it out. "That first time I saw that weird misty stuff... after you calmed me down..."
"Yes." She pulls in a deep breath, and lets it out gently. "Since then."
"Luna, how could you fall in love with me in only a week, especially after seeing what I did to the palace? It was your home, Luna..."
She makes a face like I've just told her a sick joke. "It was not your violence that made me feel this way, Spike."
"Well, what was it, then?"
She looks at me, her eyes large and wet, and says, "When I look at you, I see someone who loves his life deeply and sincerely. I see someone with a family and a town he loves more than anything else in this world, and friends for whom he would give his life. I see someone who finds joy in living without the praise or attention he so obviously deserves. I see a talented, remarkable creature, an anomaly among his own kind who is more generous and more kindhearted than half of the ponies I have known in all my years of life... including myself."
As she says this, she moves towards me, tearing up but not swiping at her eyes anymore. When she reaches me, she sits again, and stares up at me with a small, loving smile on her face.
"Most of all, I see someone whose problems I can understand. A creature who knows how it feels to be me. "
"It is a permanent reminder of my moment of weakness, when I allowed myself to lose control to the darker forces that were within me."
And suddenly I get it. I gaze down at her, jaw still loosened. She smiles back up at me, tears now freely flowing down her cheeks. The Mare in the Moon. Crying over the big bad dragon that destroyed her castle.
She says, "I love you very much, Spike. It has hurt me to see you in such pain, these past two weeks, and it makes me happy to see you return to the way you were before, even if that means..."—and here she sniffles—"...you cannot be with me."
Then she hugs me. I see the rosy color materializing around her again, but this time, it looks different: there's a solidity to it that wasn't there before. Before, it was like a fog; now it's almost like armor.
"Uh, Luna..."
She smiles into my shoulder. "Do not worry, Spike. I am in control now."
We hold each other for a moment longer, just long enough for the rosy coat to cover up her midnight blue body, and then we separate. The rosy coat fades the moment she moves away from me. So does the bedroom we've been in. Taking its place is the hallway I began this dream in, looking exactly the same as it did when I first got here. I look at the stained glass windows and wince as the memory of why I wanted to talk to Luna in the first place comes flooding back into my mind. Turning to her, I say, "I'm sorry for accusing you and your sister of all that manipulation crud earlier. I guess I keep letting the whole 'strong emotions in dreams' thing get to me."
"There is no need to apologize. You are just as vulnerable as any other dreaming creature." She hesitates, then admits, "I'm afraid we've both been overwhelmed by the power of the dream realm, these past few weeks. I can only hope you will be in a sound state of mind when you return to Equestria."
"Well, you've done a good job of keeping me sane so far." I chuckle. "Honestly, I feel like I should be paying you for therapy lessons."
"What use would a princess have with money, when I have the Royal Treasury to rely upon?"
Our laughter echoes through the endless hallway. When it dies down, Luna turns her gaze down to the carpet lining the floor. Her cheeks darken again, and to my surprise, she paws at the ground like a nervous schoolfilly.
"Spike..." she mumbles, "...I am aware that dragons live for... a very long time..."
A sigh escapes me. "Usually, yeah."
"Longer than a mortal pony ever could..."
I see where this is going. "As far as I know."
She looks at the window again, studying the image of the dragoness wrapped around a stallion.
"...I know that you love Rarity more than anything, and that your heart will always belong to her... but if, one day, you feel as though you might... be ready to move on..."
I chuckle, which makes her turn and look at me. Stepping up to her, I cup her cheek with a claw, and give her my best grin.
"Princess Luna of Equestria, I am honored and flattered that you would even consider me worthy of being your very special somedragon. And I promise, if it ever comes to that, I'll remember this moment, and then... well, we'll talk."
Her smile reappears, and once again she pulls me into a hug. Her wings flutter against my arms.
"Thank you," she mumbles.
"Of course," I reply.
Then we separate and head down the hall, walking side by side. I wait for her blush to wash away completely before engaging her in conversation again:
"Y'know," I say as we pass more of the same stained glass windows, "I wasn't joking when I said you kept me sane, these past two weeks. Without you, I'm not sure if I'd even want to go back to Ponyville ever again."
"I am glad you were able to see beyond your mistakes and forgive yourself for them. You have been through more than most creatures, mortal or otherwise."
I glance over at the window we're passing. Within its glass is the depiction of a familiar alabaster alicorn, standing at the balcony of a castle's terrace, pointing her hoof towards a scorched and blackened part of the world—formerly Haystone, nowadays Ponyville.
"I guess she has a good reason to keep me and other ponies from getting too close," I say, nodding to the Celestia in the window. "Especially after what happened back then."
"Spike..."
"And let's not forget the mess I made. That's probably a very helpful bit of evidence to use against me—"
"Spike!"
I turn to Luna. She looks at me with an ugly frown, annoyed.
"If my sister wanted you kept at a distance from ponykind, would she have made you Twilight Sparkle's assistant and sent you off to Ponyville? Would it not have been easier to not keep you in Canterlot at all, and instead have you sent off to a dragon coven when you were still just a hatchling?"
"Well, yes, but—"
"Then why did she not do that, instead of keeping you around and plotting out your life step by step, from start to finish, to ensure you remain separate from the world of equines you inhabit?"
"That's a good point, but she probably wasn't expecting me to—"
"Spike!" I fall silent immediately, much to her satisfaction, and she goes on: "My sister is not manipulating your life. She is far too busy to bother with those kinds of things. If she truly believed you were a threat to our subjects, she would use a much simpler method of eradicating you, like throwing you into the sun."
I have no proper response for that. I can't even imagine it.
"If you are still doubtful, though," she continues, "you can speak to her once you return to Equestria. I'm sure we can have a meeting arranged for the two of you."
"Th-Thanks," I mutter, still thinking about that "throw you into the sun" thing, "I think..."
"'Tis no trouble," she replies, and nudges me. "Now, let us continue our walk."
That's when I realize that I've been standing still for a while now. Shaking my head clear of anything sun-related, I start walking beside Luna again. As we move further and further down the hall, our conversation shifts from subject to subject. With each new topic, the stained glass in the windows changes, reflecting our thoughts in the images it makes. Our thoughts shine down on us in fantastic, prismatic light beams, illuminated by the endless sunlight of the dreamland we walk. Some of the images are big and bright; some are small and sad; all of them are beautiful. The windows change, from a drake at a desk reading, to a pair of dragons sitting on a park bench together, to a circle of six mares, all huddled around a dragon that seems to be slumbering. At some point I realize I'm not ever looking at the windows—I already know what they're showing me.
We reach the end of the hall. There are no doors to go through, no corners to turn, no stairs to climb. There's not even a closet leading into an eternal dark void with a mysterious golden spark this time. It's just one last, giant window. The image in it is simple and elegant: a great white circle, radiating equally white, wavy beams of light, held up by a giant purple claw.
"It's actually not that bright yet," I mention to Luna, after staring up at the image for a second.
"No," Luna replies. "This is how it appears when it is ready to return you to your world."
"Mm." I look around, hoping that a door or something might have appeared by now. Nothing new has shown up, so I ask, "Where do we go next?"
Luna frowns and says, "I am staying here, in the dreamworld. You, however, shall be awake soon."
"Oh." For some reason, my next sentence comes out as a question: "So... I'll see you tomorrow night, then?"
"I'm afraid not," she answers, looking up at the Moonstone. "I have been using too much of my energy to maintain this link with you. I am almost completely drained of my power, and I must use what little I have left to keep the time spell from failing. This is the last time we will speak to each other here."
"Oh," I repeat. I think of how used to these odd dreams I've become, and for a second I feel a sudden barrage of emotion as I realize how much I'll miss them. The sunlight outside chills into an icy blue color, tinting the stained glass and everything else in the world we've been walking through.
"I guess this is goodbye, then," I say.
Luna, still gazing up at the image of the Moonstone, takes a while to respond. Her chest expands as she pulls in a lungful of dream-air, and recedes as she lets it out in one long, heavy sigh. She breaks eye contact with the great white circle in the window and gazes at me with sad, blue eyes.
"Farewell, Spike. I hope to see you again soon."
A sudden shudder shakes the both of us, and I almost fall over. Luna remains firmly planted on the ground, but she looks up at the black void of a ceiling this place has and mutters, "Something is trying to wake you."
Another shudder hits, this one much less violent. The hallway is beginning to vanish around us. I can feel something silky and smooth rubbing against my scales—my blankets, I realize. When the next shudder hits, it feels more like a shove against my arm, and I watch as Luna suddenly splits into two of herself, as does everything else. I think of the last time I something woke me up while speaking to Luna, and something occurs to me.
"Luna?" I call, hoping she can still hear me.
"Yes, Spike?"
Another shove, this one lighter than the last. "What were their names? The dragoness and the stallion? I couldn't get them both the first time."
I'm suddenly made aware that I'm lying down and not standing up, and my sheets are more tangible than the floor of the hallway. Despite all this, I can still see Luna, and the small, sad smile that I've seen her wearing quite a few times during these past two weeks.
Her whisper barely carries through the void: "The dragoness was called Rose Quartz.
"The stallion's name was Artemis."
____________________________________________________________________
It's Rarity that's shaken me awake. She whispers my name (the false one, anyway) as I come back to the world, and when my eyes open she calls it out a little louder.
"Emerald?"
"Whosat?"
"It's me, Emerald. It's Rarity."
"Who's Em?" I slur. My brain doesn't seem to be working properly, which is weird, seeing how just a second ago I'd been talking to Princess Luna just fine.
"You are, darling."
I stare at her. Then my brain catches up with the rest of my body, and I yelp and bolt up in bed. Rarity backs away from her spot just beside me, towards the desk with On the Species sitting on it.
"What're—What're you doing in my room?" I yell, holding my sheets around me like I don't normally walk around without any clothes on.
"Twilight let me in!" she retorts, leaning against the desk. "I was worried you were gone already!"
"'Gone?' What d'you mean, 'gone?'"
"We made plans to have breakfast together, and you never came over to the boutique!"
We had made plans, I remembered. Of course, with the dreams I've been having lately, I've grown a tendency to oversleep.
Crap. "What time is it?" I ask.
"It's nearly noon." Rarity looks down at her feet. "I kept myself busy by cleaning the rest of the boutique, but you were so late I thought..." Her expression darkens. "I thought you'd already left me."
I realize how worried I've made her, and even though I had no control over how long I slept (or maybe I did, who knows), I feel awful. Briefly, my eyes flicker to the Moonstone, sitting beside On the Species on the desk. It looks like a snowball inside of a snow globe now, with only an inch or so of a ring around the edge. One day more. Maybe less.
"I'm sorry. I overslept."
"I know," she mumbles, trying to hide her face with her curly, purple spines. "I just thought..."
"Hey..." I stumble out of my bed and over to Rarity. I take her hand in mine and squeeze it, trying to comfort her. When that fails to affect her, I look over at the Moonstone and think for a second. Then I snatch it up. "Look," I say, holding the orb in front of my face. Rarity obliges, and she watches me breathe a steady stream of emerald flames over the gem until it's entirely consumed. I feel the weight of it vanish in my hand and reappear in my storage center.
There, I think, picturing the little crumpled parchment sitting next to it. Now you're both in a safe place.
I show Rarity my emptied hand, adding a "Ta-da!" to try and get her to cheer up. Her frown dissolves, which is a start, and I smile. Pulling her into a hug, I rub my cheek against her neck and say, "I'm not leaving you now. Especially not that way."
"You should have set an alarm," she says.
I smile against her shoulder. "Yeah, I probably should have." I kiss the scales on her neck and pull away, bringing our faces close together. "Can we still have breakfast together?"
So she brings me back to the Carousel Boutique, where breakfast is waiting for us. Waiting for a few hours, actually.
"I made it before I realized you weren't coming." Rarity explains, still holding my hand. "It's probably freezing cold by now."
I stare at the probably-freezing cold meal in front of us and think about how I'm not hungry at all. I look over at Rarity, who is looking somberly at the breakfast table, and think about how lovely she looks in the glow of the almost-noon sunlight streaming in from the nearby window.
"Are you sure it's cold yet?" I ask, rubbing my thumb along her wrist. "We could let it sit a little longer, just to be safe."
Her eyes flicker to our connected hands, then up to me. A faint blush taints her cheeks. Soon, though, it's replaced with a tiny, knowing smile.
"Oh?" she says, playing along. "No smoky kisses by the refrigerator this time?"
"I can do that, if you'd like."
She giggles. "I think I'd prefer it if we start in the bedroom. You nearly ruined the carpeting on the stairs last time."
I'm pulled by the arm out of the kitchen, towards the stairs. Her tail swishes against my nose, bathing my nostrils in her scent.
By the time we come back into the kitchen, breakfast is indeed freezing cold. And it's delicious anyway.
____________________________________________________________________
It wasn't all sex and breakfast, that last day. There was more after that. She showed me what she was making for her latest client, and told me how he needed it for some big, fancy party in a city called Onyx, and how it might catch the eye of any of the many fashion moguls that could potentially show up that night, and that was why it was so important she get it perfect for him, even though he was such a bore and had absolutely no fashion sense whatsoever (besides choosing Rarity as his tailor, of course). Her talk turned into a demonstration, which ended with me helping her put a few extra touches on the ensemble. By that time, it was almost sundown (breakfast was really that late), and I offered to take her out for dinner, which is exactly what I did. We walked through town and talked and laughed, and searched for a restaurant to eat at, and when it turned out the places we knew were all full we just ended up stepping into the Sugarcube Corner and ordering some milkshakes. We sat outside and drank them while we watched the sun go down. We walked back to the Boutique after that, savoring the coolness of the summer night air. We watched fireflies wink at us from in trees and behind bushes, and stopped at the river for a moment to watch the moon. We talked more, and kissed more, and at one point I fell into the water and pulled Rarity in with me. It was freezing when we stepped out, thanks to the breeze that had decided to start up while we had our milkshakes, and we warmed ourselves with each others' bodies. It didn't matter what we did in that time, really. We were just happy to spend it together.
Time flies when you want it to last, though, and soon we're back at the Boutique, and I'm standing in the doorway again, ready to wish her good night and goodbye.
She laughs when I tell her this. Stepping up to me, she wraps her arms around my neck and her tail around my waist. Her snout rubs up against mine, and her tongue flicks out and tickles my lips.
"I'm not letting you get away that easily, darling," she whispers. "Besides, I still have one more outfit to show you before you go."
Pulling me with her tail, she leads me back inside and up to her room. The outfit she wants to show me is already laid out on the bed. Letting me lie down, she slips it on.
"Well?" she asks when she's finished. "Anything I should change?" She lies down on her stomach next to me and folds her arms under her head. Her tongue flickers out again, playful. I look her up and down, and realize that my claws are digging into her sheets again.
"No," I say, rolling over so I can hold her. "It's absolutely flawless."
It isn't all sex and breakfast, that last day. It is all perfect.
Which makes what happens next suck even more.
____________________________________________________________________
I don't dream that night. My sleep, which comes in short, sudden bursts, is filled with darkness. No blue, no grey, no hallways or parks or balconies. Just deep, restful darkness.
My stomach gets me out of this cycle of slipping in and out of consciousness by giving me what feels like an intense stomachache. Sitting up in bed, I grab at the spot where the pain is coming from, as if that might stop it. When it doesn't, I pull back the sheets covering me and look down at myself.
My stomach is glowing. Shimmering white light is leaking from in between my scales and lighting the area under the sheets like it's a little colt reading comic books past curfew. It's not blinding, but it's definitely enough to wake somedragon if it shines right in their eyes.
From beside me on the bed, Rarity stirs. Covering myself again, I look over at her and pray for her to stay asleep. She turns over, away from me, and swivels her neck until her head is facing the end of the bed. She sighs, settles back down, and then all I hear from her are soft snores.
I watch her for a while, wanting to lie back down and wrap my arms around her again, but the pain in my stomach intensifies, informing me that that's not an option. I look down at the glowing spot again. I know exactly what it is, of course, and I'm tempted to get rid of it, to use my sending fire or something to send it somewhere else. Anywhere else.
But that wouldn't be fair, so I don't.
Making sure not to wake her, I slide out of Rarity's bed, keeping the glowing spot covered as long as I can. Slipping out the bedroom door and down the stairs, I spit out the Moonstone and search for something to cover it with. I find a purple swatch of fabric on the floor of Rarity's studio, but it does nothing to cover up the glow. I try putting more over it, but no matter how much of anything I use, the glow doesn't become any dimmer. I guess the gem really didn't want me to miss the chance to go back.
I give up my search for a cover and head for the front door, wishing I could stay and knowing that I can't. My hand is on the handle when I notice there's a quill and some parchment sitting on one of her desks nearby. I glance at the stairs, nervous and hearing noises from things that aren't really there. Slinking over to the desk as quietly as I can, I pick up the quill and spread out a piece of parchment. I scribble for a minute, set the quill down, and sneak back upstairs, leaving the Moonstone shining on the desk.
Much to my relief, Rarity is still asleep, her head still pointed at the foot of the bed. I inch over to her, parchment in hand, and set it next to her claw. I stare at the parchment, and for a second I consider tearing it to pieces, letting the noise of it wake her up so I can tell her I've decided not to leave, or slipping back under the covers of her bed and falling asleep again, letting the Moonstone glow and blink and, eventually, burn out.
But that wouldn't be fair, so I don't.
Instead, I kiss her forehead and stroke her beautiful purple crest, wishing I could do more. Then I slip out of the room for the last time. I snatch up the Moonstone, finding that it's grown strangely warmer since I last touched it, and head out the door of the Carousel Boutique and into the night.
It's warm outside, too, and the wind that had been blowing a few hours earlier has died down. Everything is still and silent except me, trudging through the streets and searching for the arch I walked under two weeks ago, when this whole mess was just beginning. Fortunately, that's one of the few paths I've managed to remember in my time here, so it only takes a few minutes to find the twisted metal poles making up Dragonsville's welcome mat. I stop when I reach them, and stare out into the darkness beyond the town. It takes a minute for my eyes to adjust, but I can see the path I took to get here, and the hill I walked down, and the forest I thought was the Everfree back when I'd first gotten here (which is technically still called the Everfree Forest here, it's just not my Everfree Forest). And beyond that, in a clearing next to a cow ranch...
The Moonstone feels hot now. I wonder if it might burn me.
I look up at the arch and run my claws along its sides. The metal is cool and smooth. The arch is much taller than I remember—though I guess I wasn't paying very close attention to it that first time, since I'd been focused more on the ponies that weren't ponies, but dragons—but that makes sense, what with all the different sizes of dragons that live here. I think of that moment, when I first realized that I wasn't in Ponyville anymore, and it feels nearly impossible to believe that that happened just two weeks ago. With everything that's happened since, I feel like I've been here a year and a half, not two short weeks. At the same time, I wish I could stay longer. Turning around, I look out at the town I've called home for the past fortnight and imagine what it would be like to live here. I imagine dragons rushing from place to place on Market Day, when the streets are lined with booths and carts, and everydragon has something to sell. I imagine being a part of that rushing crowd, trying to get all the ingredients I need to make dinner for myself and Twilight. I imagine the adventures I've lived through with the Bearers of Harmony, played out in this dragon-led world. I imagine living in the Carousel Boutique with Rarity, visiting Twilight and Pinkie Pie at the library or the Sugarcube Corner, helping Applejack with the harvest down at the Acres, having tea with Fluttershy in her—
From down the street, I spot a dragon coming towards me. I realize who it is before the moonlight even hits her, and I freeze up as she charges towards me, smoke billowing from her nostrils.
Rarity stops directly in front of me, balled fists against her hips. I can only hope the expression on my face is pathetic enough to keep her from yelling at me. She looks me dead in the eye, fury incarnate, and says nothing. She pays no attention to the glowing ball of light in my hand.
Finally, I say, "Uh, hi, Rarit—"
And then she smacks me upside the face.
"What is the matter with you?" she yells, ignoring the fact that I'm stumbling against the arch trying not to scream in pain. "After everything that we've been through, after I've forgiven you countless times for your lies, after you tore my heart to pieces and put it back to together again in under a week, this is what you give me?"
Through the tears that are uncontrollably welling up in my eyes, I see her hold up a piece of parchment. My note to her.
"Thank you so much for everything," she reads, "I hate that I have to leave this way, but it's happening too fast. I wish I didn't have to hurt you. I wish I didn't have to leave you at all, but I can't stay here. Please try to forget me. I love you."
She lowers the parchment, crumpling it into a ball in her fist. I stare at her, resisting the urge to try and claw away the pain in my face.
"You couldn't even wake me?" she asks, angry tears forming in her eyes.
"I didn't want you to see me—"
"You promised, though!" she shouts. "You promised me you wouldn't leave without telling me goodbye! And now you've lied to me, again!"
"I didn't lie. I left the note..."
"And when was I supposed to read it, hmm? In the morning, hours after you'd left?"
"Maybe, I don't—"
"And how was this"—she holds up her balled fist to indicate the note—"supposed to be a goodbye? Was I supposed to accept it as some sort of romantic parting gift like some idiot schoolfilly in a terrible romance novel?"
"I didn't want to hurt you more—"
"I can handle being hurt, Emerald!" Her spit flecks on my face. "This isn't the first time I've had my heart broken!"
"That's what I wanted to avoid—"
"Well, too bad! You're going to break my heart, Emerald, and you're going to do it to my face! Not with some—some trite little note!"
Her horn flashes with violent light, and her hand opens to reveal the crumpled parchment bursting into icy blue flames. In a second, the note is consumed, and the fire dissipates, leaving only a clump of ashes in her hand. She dumps these onto the ground, steps closer to me, and puts her claws back on her hips.
"So do it now," she growls, "and we can part on acceptable terms."
The burning in my face has dulled to an ache now. I breathe in, clenching and unclenching my claws while thinking of something to say. I breathe out, and put my claws on Raritys' shoulders. She doesn't push them off, which I'm thankful for.
"I'm sorry," I begin. "I've been... very self-destructive, these past few weeks, and I've hurt a lot of the ones I love because of that. A lot has happened that I still can't explain, and I don't think I'll ever be able to explain it. Not completely, anyway.
"I wish I could stay with you. I want to stay with you, and live with you, and be happy with you."
"Then why don't you just do that?" she asks. "Why not just take that thing"—she points to the Moonstone, which is lying against the welcome/goodbye arch—"toss it somewhere nodragon will ever find it, and stay here?"
"Because that wouldn't be fair. So I won't."
"Wouldn't be fair how?"
I hesitate to answer. "...I left a lot of my friends... my family... when I came here. I can't just let them think I'm gone forever."
"But you can come back, can't you? There's got to be some way you can—"
"No, there's not. When I leave, I can't ever come back."
Rarity's crying now. I cup her cheek and lift her head up so I can look her in the eye.
"I want you to be happy, okay? When I'm gone, I don't want you to trash your house, or do that thing with the dome, or any of that. Please?"
"It's not fair!" she yells, and throws herself on me, bawling into my shoulder.
"No, it's not," is all I can say.
We stand there for a minute, holding each other. I stare the Moonstone and wonder how long it'll be before it starts blinking at me.
"Is there any way I can come with you?" she mumbles against my shoulder.
"I don't think so," I say. "You probably wouldn't like it, where I come from."
"Why not?"
A sigh that could have been a chuckle escapes me. "Do you remember when I first tried to tell you the truth?"
"Vaguely."
"Do you remember where I said I was from?"
A pause. Then: "Equestria. You said it was called Equestria."
"That's right. Equestria is a lot like Serpentia, only, instead of dragons, it's mostly populated by—"
"—ponies," Rarity finishes. She pulls herself out of my shoulder and looks me in the eye again. I can tell by her look that she remembers our talk. "A-And you said, instead of Night Fury, you had..."
"Nightmare Moon, right. Glad you remember."
She continues to remember: "You said you had a Princess Luna of your own there, and that she was a pony and not a dragon, and—" She takes a step back, keeping her claws on my shoulders. She stares off into space for a moment, then focuses back on me. "...Emerald? I-Is there a Princess Celestia in your world?"
"There is."
Her grip on my shoulders tightens. "Is there... Is there a Twilight Sparkle?"
"Yep. And an Applejack, and a Fluttershy, and a Rainbow Dash, and—"
"And a Rarity?" Her claws are biting into my scales now.
I nod.
"Oh." Rarity looks as though she might faint. She wobbles, and I hold her steady. She rests her head on my collar. Her spines tickle my neck.
"Emerald?"
"Yes?"
"You promised me you'd tell me your real name, in the library. You promised."
I did promise. I squeeze her gently and say, "I guess I should keep at least one, huh?" I lean down, craning my neck to reach the side of her face. Kissing the spot just beneath her chin, not knowing what the outcome of telling her will be, I whisper my name.
Nothing happens. She doesn't gasp, she doesn't laugh, she doesn't even flinch. She just stays where she is, holding on to me very tight. She stays this way for a minute, before she finally moves, pushing herself out to look at me. She brings a claw to my face and turns it, getting a good look at my scales, then my spines, and then my collar. She stares at the blank spot where my cutie mark should be (had I ever been a part of this world), and scratches it with a claw. Finally, she looks into my eyes again, her own expression not amazed, or awed, or even dumbstruck; she just looks... surprised. Like she just bumped into somedragon on the street. That kind of surprised. It makes me grin, and I have to suppress a laugh.
"Hi," I say.
"Hi," she mumbles back, still staring. Then she says, "You know, I feel rather embarrassed now, for not having seen it earlier."
I laugh, unable to hold it in any longer, and to my amazement this doesn't make her angry again. She just smiles, and then I lean in and kiss her because I can't think of anything else to do and I'm a hopeless romantic. She pulls me into her, and I feel a familiar fluttering sensation tickle the inside of my stomach. Her claws stroke the back of my neck, and her spines are thin and smooth, and her lips are warm and loving. She squeezes me, digging her claws into my scales, and her tail wraps around mine. Her lips part, and I feel fire stream from behind them into my mouth. The fluttering sensation turns to heat, and my own fire comes gushing up from my throat. It mixes with hers, and our lips smolder together for one more wonderful, burning second before she pulls away and lets the fire escape. I watch with her as the green and icy blue fireball rises up into the air for a second before going out, leaving a cloud of smoke to hover over us. I look back at her and grin again.
"That was nice."
She nods, and takes her claws off of me. She looks down at the Moonstone, picks it up, and offers it to me.
"I suppose she'll be waiting for you, then," she says with a sad smile.
"Yeah. I guess." I take the orb. "You understand, right?"
"I do." She folds her arms. "I think it was rather shallow of you to immediately choose the dragon counterpart over her, though."
I shrug. "Hey. You're still you, whatever the species. I'm just glad I have the guts to ask you out now."
"I'm sure you do." She steps up to me again, and grabs my empty hand with both of hers. Looking into my eyes, she says, "Don't lie anymore. It's not like you."
"I know." I squeeze her hands. "I haven't really been myself lately."
That makes her smile. She lets go of my hands and gives me another kiss on the lips—a small, sweet sendoff.
"Goodbye, Mr. Spires," she whispers.
"Farewell, my lady."
I turn towards the arch, start walking, and stop. I turn around and watch her as she walks back towards her boutique, back into her life with her friends Applejack and Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy and Twilight Sparkle the dragons and Spike the unicorn. I imagine, in a brief, fleeting second, throwing away the Moonstone and running back into her arms, telling her I don't care about anything else but her and that I want to be her knight in shining armor and live happily ever after with her. I imagine our wedding, how perfect she'd look in her dress, and how I'd carry her down the aisle after the ceremony, and how we'd ride of into the sunset on our way to our honeymoon. I imagine sitting beside her and our eggs, watching them first shudder and then crack and finally burst apart, bringing our beautiful children into the world. I imagine watching them grow up, teaching them fire lessons while Rarity shows them the proper way to find gemstones. I imagine lying with her in our home, centuries into the future, atop a hoard of treasure that I would give away in a second to spend another lifetime with her. I imagine all the kisses goodnight, and all the breakfasts going cold in the morning, and all the dances and laughter and walks and picnics, and everything that starts the moment I choose to drop the Moonstone and run back to her. I imagine all of this, all in one second, and in that second my grip on the orb in my claw grows very very loose.
But that wouldn't be fair, so I don't.
Instead, I call to her: "Hey!"
She turns, not yet far enough away to not hear me.
"Y'know that library assistant, the one that works with Twilight Sparkle? I think he likes you!"
I hear her laugh, and it makes me smile. She raises her arm and gives me a short wave. I give a short wave back. Then she turns, keeps walking, and disappears around a corner.
Still smiling, I turn away from the town and pass under the arch that welcomed me all that time ago, stepping out of Dragonsville, and out of her life, forever.
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I'm buying myself ice cream regardless, not like you can stop me anyways. It's for finishing this colossal of a fic. Meanwhile, I expect you to buy yourself a cake for writing this thing. It's been an awesome ride.
And next comes the end
...
Well, into the abyss we go.
Solve problem say Three Two One.
Guessing it means final chapter is next or is coming in three or less chapters.
A brilliant tale this has been indeed.
Love the way you wove this, my dear dear author.
this has been the most heartfelt story I have read in my life I have never cried seeing a movie or reading a book I didn't even cry when I lost my dog
but this story has made me cry 
tears of joy ,tears of sadness
, tears of laughter 
, now for the first time in years I can say proudly I cried.
This story is now number ten in my top ten stories on this site good job you win at life.
It is funny. This has been one of my fav Spike x Rarity stories to date. I enjoyed watching the ups and down between the two greatly. But in this one chapter I now wish he would hook up with Luna. She just seems to be such a better fit for this Spike and clearly cares about him. Not to mention they wouldn't have to worry about him going nuts and she would have a lover way longer if she took a pony one. It is funny how one greatly written chapter can change how one feels
4630826 I concur.
Ah.... wow. Just... wow... you were only 15 when you started this? Wow... your good... such a strong writer... please tell me you'll be writing an actual novel sometimes, because I honestly truly think, you can be an amazing author.
You can have my applause, good author.
This story is Amazing!!!
Great job with this story. I loved these two chapters. They were intense. I think you did a great job capturing Spike's Rarity's Twilights, and Lunas personalities. This was great to read. Thank you for starting this story.
Zero
Onward we go.
I only hope Rarity and Spike in both universes can find their happiness.
Just started reading this last night and I've been up all night reading it...
Overall, the entire story has been absolutely amazing and I'll be sure to check out some more of your amazing work!
Also, cannot wait until next chapter!!!!!
Sorry, but no. The story simply gave up at that Spike and Luna moment. And I'm not talking about the romance (I could buy that). It was the fight that was horribly handled.
Luna complained to Spike that he became a monster because someone was RUDE to him. Rude? What he (and even Rarity) did was waaay beyond being rude. He had all the right in the world to be furious, but not to rampage, of course. Plus, Luna and Celestia plotedin secret instead of, you know, talking to him straight on (that same misrable sin that the mane 5 did in mare-do-well) and Spike accepts the whole crap way too easily. It's like Luna and Celestia expect Spike to accept any crap throw at him by ponies and do NOTHING to punish the ones that treat him badly.
To make things worse, Spike simply accepts all th crap and takes all the blame to himself (he'ss not that innocent either, but there's plenty of others also at fault there) and that apology from Luna was weak as hell...
It hurt a lot see an awsome story destroy itself in a sigle scene.
Also, Steven Universe reference?
edit just to add something i just remembered: Luna at first admits that Celestia and her had a hand on the plot to not let Spike fall in love with a pony, but then says that Celeistia didn't plan behind his back? Contradictory much?
Huh, curious. This place seems to be missing an Auto-Illustrations button... I will have to settle for making this one of my favorites!
Well, I've only been following this story since the update before this one, but the short part of this journey that I've been a part of has been fun. Congratulations on your completion of a great story.
My face hurts...A lot.
One of the better reversed role stories I've read...
If I was pony spike I would feel so inadequate dating dragon rarity. I would have the constant fear of not measuring up. If you know what I mean. I mean other me was a dragon for gods sake.
That AN was beautiful, like a true motivational speech about all that is great with us as a community. Oh, and the story has been awesome too
During the Spike and Luna scene with the discussion of monsters, this song came to mind:
[youtube=i2VQ_fWra8E]
I've enjoyed this story from the start. I only wish I didnt have to be away from the site so long and miss it while it was still in progress. While reading a fully completed story all at once is nice and all, there is nothing like the community feel when its in progress and trading comments.
Rose Quartz?
That reminds me of Steven Universe, and that Rose Quartz.
It seems anyone named Rose Quartz is bound to fall in love with other sentient species...