"I'm not sure. Prudentia's active and glowing, so he's probably talking with Keela. She was a mess this morning," I heard Twilight comment, as my consciousness shifted back into my world. My world. Yeah, this was home for me, I admitted.
"Yeah. She must be really sad. I hope everything's okay and... Oh! I think he's waking up," Fluttershy pointed out as I stirred, feeling my muscles wake up again and my eyes open. It was always disorienting transferring myself when I wasn't sleeping. Turning my head, I saw Fluttershy lying next to me, and Twilight on the end of the bed, expression softening as my eyes locked onto her.
Cracking my back, I rotated around so I was facing Fluttershy instead of the wall, and looked about. "Hey. Am I late for something?" I asked slowly, checking Clocky for the time. There wasn't any weird time delays or anything, and it was still quite late at night.
"Just in time for bed?" Twilight offered, smiling weakly but not making any attempt at moving. Fluttershy glanced over at her, but she just nodded and closed her eyes for a moment. "I also wanted to apologize for freaking out earlier. I know it's silly, but I'm just, well, scared. I've only been with a mare once, and never with a stallion, so this is all really new to me," she apologized quietly.
I shook my head slowly, considering it before pointing out, "We weren't trying to force you to do anything with either of us, Twilight. I don't want to make you do anything you don't want to, and you certainly don't have to or feel obligated to."
She didn't exactly look convinced, however, frowning instead. "Mender, you have urges, too. I know you don't want to force us into doing anything, but you have to realize that you're not. Fluttershy admitted that she enjoyed it just as much, if not more than you. Us taking care of your urges, too, is... It's what lovers do, no?" she asked a bit louder, Fluttershy starting to blush now.
She looked even more surprised when I shook my head. "No, lovers love each other. There are no conditions that I've put on that. You could go the next ten years and not do a single sexual thing with me, and I'd still care about you just as much. You told me that you don't think there's anything wrong with me and that you're just scared, so I've no reason to doubt you," I corrected, shifting a bit more against Fluttershy as I rested.
Twilight's eyes softened and she looked down at the sheets again, but Fluttershy shook her head instead and kissed me on the forehead. "I think what she's trying to say is that she wants to trust you and do things with you like that because she cares. We just need to work on that trust part first," Fluttershy suggested quietly.
I closed my eyes softly, biting back the first reply that came to mind, of course. She didn't have the slightest bit of trouble trusting Fluttershy with that sort of thing. Sure, they say it doesn't matter that I'm an alien or not quite entirely a pony, but they were plagued by just as many subconscious doubts as I was.
"You're scared of me, then?" I asked gently, going with the far more diplomatic option.
Twilight's eyes widened a bit and she quickly opened her mouth again, but froze as I looked up at her. Hesitation. A second later, she bit her lip instead and looked away from me before admitting, "A little."
I had to resist laughing at the irony. She was scared of me just like I'd been scared of her. Well, a part of me still was scared of her. She'd have to try a lot harder to 'accidentally' annihilate me, of course, but I'd let her closer and she was capable of a much more intimate form of pain now. Just like she was causing now, it would seem. But no, I couldn't fault her for being scared of the monster she knew I could become. Still, I felt cold suddenly.
I hadn't realized I'd been quiet until Fluttershy nudged me on the shoulder. "M-Mender, are you okay?" she asked, knowing otherwise by the link. She was polite, regardless.
"I don't think anything's okay at the moment. Maybe... Maybe we should tone it down a bit until we trust each other a little more? I don't want you scared of me, so..." I offered, looking back up at Twilight, who snapped back to looking at me in an instant.
"Um, tone it down?" she asked hesitantly, eyes searching mine rapidly.
I looked away and towards the exit again before sighing and adding, "I think I should sleep on the couch." She stared at me, eyes slowly widening as they started to shiver, and she shook her head slowly.
"A-Are you... Please, Mender. I want to be your fillyfriend still," Twilight whispered, sliding forwards instead as she shifted towards me. I winced at her getting closer and stood, moving back and away from her as Fluttershy looked back and forth between us.
"I... I didn't say that, Twilight. We just need to get away from each other until... I don't know. Maybe the trust exercises will help?" I suggested, swallowing the lump in my throat. She was scared of me, just like I'd been scared of her. No, this wasn't irony. Something just had a sick sense of humor. We couldn't be 'with' each other if she was scared of me. I was a monster, but...
"Mender, please. Please, just... I want to get closer, not further apart. I..." Twilight muttered, taking another step towards me. I shuddered, and then closed my eyes. In an odd sort of way, drawing upon my inner monster lent me strength. An inner resolve that I normally didn't feel. My eyes opened again a second later as blue instead, my legs sinking into the bed as the armor folded out and around me, sharp ridges sliding out and tentacles extending towards the ceiling.
Fluttershy squeaked and took to the air, looking at me in surprise as I shuddered again and sighed, looking up at the startled looking, frozen Twilight. "This is inside of me, and both of you know that deep down. It's hideous and monstrous, right? How? How can you honestly say that you want to get closer to this?" I asked, dual voices twisting out as I flicked my tentacles back and forth above me.
Twilight stared at me for a second before her eyes softened and relaxed again. She smiled a second later and shook her head, to my surprise. "That form being inside of you still hurts you, I know. But I can be easily honest about that. Neither Fluttershy nor I are scared of it. Startled or uneasy when you take that form, maybe. Scared? No. We know it's you in there regardless of what you look like, Mender," she assured. She stood there, unflinching no matter how hard I stared at her. She was... She was telling the truth. But she just said...
"Twilight, we talked about this. You need to be honest and open so he understands you," Fluttershy softly reminded, slowing her wing flaps until she landed on the bed again.
I looked between them momentarily until shifting my attention fully back to the lavender mare, pulling my armor and extra limbs back inside. So what was she afraid of, then?
Twilight hesitated, frowning at nothing in particular on the sheets between her front hooves before nodding to herself. Looking back up at me then, she explained, "I'm scared of you. I'm scared of the power you have over my own feelings that snuck up on me before I could fully understand them. I'm scared of... I'm scared of disappointing you or making you upset. Most of all, I'm scared that, after me realizing that this is something I want, I'm going to drive you away. I don't want you to leave me."
I stared at her, not quite processing what she just said. All I could think of was the same mare who told me to get out, and to keep away from her, and who got pissed off at one of her best friends for tricking her into kissing me. What changed? More importantly, why did that information suddenly make me feel vulnerable? She was giving me a lot of power over her, and I realized a moment later that I didn't think I was responsible enough for that. I wasn't 'worth' it.
Closing my eyes, I slumped slightly, feeling exhausted suddenly. I already didn't deal well with social things, but all of this was just too much for me. There wasn't enough energy in my body to deal with all of this properly. Maybe Redheart would agree to putting me back in a coma for a few weeks? I might get some proper rest, then.
"I'm so tired..." I muttered, feeling my legs start to shake under me. Fatigue would be a good word for it. It was making me feel old. Ancient even.
"W-We can go to bed, Mender. It has been a long day," Fluttershy admitted, slipping up next to me, and then squeaking when I collapsed fully on my chest instead.
"It's one thing after another. It feels like I haven't slept properly since I got to Equestria. Maybe sleeping for a week straight might get my energy back?" I muttered, shuddering as I lay there.
Twilight let out a soft whine before moving forwards and lying down in front of me, nose to nose. "I'm sorry, Mender. You seriously need a vacation. Away from all the hectic stuff, fillies, mares, and maybe even Fluttershy and me..." she whispered, not smiling but looking into my eyes earnestly.
I stared at her for a moment before shaking my head. "You two can come," I assured before leaning and lightly kissing her on the lips. Twilight's eyes widened for just a second before she relaxed and leaned forwards into the kiss, exhaling gently.
I backed off a few seconds later and tilted onto my side instead. "I'm sad and frustrated that you didn't just tell me all of this, but it's not going to keep me angry for long. Let's just focus on the trust exercises tomorrow, okay?" I spoke, sticking to that whole 'truthful' thing.
Twilight's horn lit up, and for just a moment, I was wary. She pulled the covers down under us, however, and slipped up next to me instead, also lying on her side but facing me this time. "I'm sorry, Mender. Again, I'm scared of disappointing you. Which, uh, I suppose I did by trying to not disappoint you. Guess that backfired," she pondered out loud, coughing and averting her gaze.
Fluttershy drifted in and lightly stood behind Twilight for a moment before frowning. She stared for a few seconds before I looked up and raised an eyebrow towards her curiously, causing her to blush a bit and Twilight to look over her shoulder at her. "Um, what's wrong, Fluttershy?" she asked curiously a moment later.
"Well, it's silly but, um, I realized I can't cuddle with both of you at once, and if I go between you two, you can't cuddle with each other," she explained softly. I blinked, and then looked at Twilight as well, realizing her quandary. She'd have to lie on top of us, which wouldn't be comfortable for anypony involved.
"Uh, the only solution until somepony invents antigravity would be to take turns," I deduced, shrugging lightly.
Twilight tilted her head, and then scratched under her chin in thought. Uh oh. She wasn't going to... "That's a really good idea! A bed enchantment that promotes antigravity or basic levitation magic over it. Then the individuals can float in perfect comfort at night rather than be subject to gravity! Herds would be able to sleep however they want, even..." she deduced a moment later.
I sighed, realizing I probably had more experience with antigravity, and decided to point some things out. "Actually, that's a very problematic idea. Safety concerns are first, as you'd have to restrict the localized effect or risk ponies either drifting off, or drifting out of the area and falling. You'd also have to concern yourself with getting down safely. Turning off the effect and falling onto the bed is fine so long as nopony gets hurt, but otherwise, you might get stuck floating with nothing to create momentum. Further, that would cause ponies to spend at least a third of their time in zero gravity, which would have pronounced health issues, such as muscle atrophy, cardiovascular gradient shifts screwing with blood volume, and bone density problems over long term exposure," I warned.
Twilight stared at me in surprise for a moment, and Fluttershy just looked confused as to how we'd gotten onto this topic. Actually, it was a rather off-topic tangent. I was good at those. "Uh, never mind. Let's just take turns. You two haven't seen each other for a few days, so why don't you be in the middle, Twilight? I'll hug your back," I offered, resting my head on the pillow again.
Twilight got a smirk on her face instead, however. Uh oh. "Actually, how about we don't sleep at all?" she asked, lighting her horn up softly. That was hardly advisable. I'd be seriously cranky tomorrow, and I didn't even want to think about Twilight's mood if she... Oh.
"You want to connect us together?" I inquired, earning a happy smile from Fluttershy and a nod from Twilight.
"Oh, I was hoping we'd do that. It's so amazing!" Fluttershy squeaked out, swaying back and forth happily. True. Our positions hardly mattered if we could play together in our dreams all night.
Twilight momentarily looked surprised before she squeaked, asking, "Oh yeah! You said that your forehead connection worked on Rainbow. You tried it with Fluttershy, too?"
"Yeah. It worked just the same. I suspect I can form one without being a unicorn because of my spellcasting ability," I reasoned, yawning afterwards. Ugh. It was too late to discuss this stuff.
Twilight seemed to read my feelings through the link and nodded, flopping over and snuggling into Fluttershy for a moment before touching her horn to the pegasus' forehead. I slid up behind them and watched as the link formed between the two mares, the soft lines of light connecting their foreheads in a yellow and lavender glow. Both opened their eyes at the same time, smiling towards each other. I relaxed a little, watching them now. We'd been through a lot together and it would take a lot more than just this to knock us apart. There was no sense in stressing out over all of it. Of course, a part of that was my tiredness talking, but it was good advice nonetheless.
"We're all linked up, Mender. Your turn, and you guide us into a fully lucid dream?" Twilight requested, rotating to face me and leaning her face forwards, horn extended.
I nodded and leaned in as well, kissing her instead of touching my forehead to it. She gave a start, and I felt Fluttershy squeak through both links a moment later as well as I pushed the kissing sensation to both of them at the same time, despite Twilight being the only one kissed.
The lavender mare exhaled softly and relaxed, leaning into my lips with a slow nudge, giving no resistance as I gently hugged her to me. Her body was warm and her lips were oh so soft against my own and I felt her shudder as if a current was running between us. A few seconds later, I nudged up instead and bumped my forehead into the link fully, completing it and stabilizing it in my mind.
"Mmm, that was a pleasant surprise," Twilight admitted, blushing softly as I gave her another squeeze.
"Heh. Wanted to get a real kiss in before we slipped away into dreams. It's been a while since we've done this," I reminded, glancing up at the two different lines going into my forehead, one blue and lavender, and the other blue and yellow.
She frowned and flattened her ears back before apologizing again. "I'm sorry, Mender. Shining told my parents about it and my dad threw a fit. Now that we're a herd, it's okay, but before..." I bit my tongue, but they both sensed it anyways through both links this time, and Twilight swallowed and rapidly shook her head.
"Don't even say it. You are a part of this herd! It will be official tomorrow, even if I have to tear the entire office apart brick by brick until they change it," she assured, looking exceptionally determined. The scary part was, she could...
"Relax, Twi. I'm not really that upset over it anymore. It seems like it's going to be an easy fix, regardless," I reasoned, silently hoping I was right. If it was anything like Keldarian bureaucracy, we were in for a world of hurt.
She didn't exactly look as confident as I tried to sound, but nodded anyways. "I know it upset you, though, and even if it will be fixed by tomorrow, don't expect it to be the end of us fixing things! We have a lot of making up and apologizing to do, so expect pampering," she reminded. I groaned in mild frustration, earning a giggle from both mares before Twilight rotated around and settled against Fluttershy. I slipped forwards after and snuggled into her back, cushioning the lavender mare between both of us as she pulled the covers up again and draped us in warmth. I think it was one of the greatest pleasures in the world, to snuggle in a warm bed. Especially with the weather getting really nippy outside!
"Are we ready, then?" I asked gently, just to make sure, of course.
Fluttershy made a positive sounding hum, and Twilight nodded against her a second later, so I relaxed and closed my eyes. It was like they didn't close, of course. Both of them were right there, and I could 'feel' them just as easily as I could see them, all three of us pushed together gently. The links worked overtime at this distance, doubled with the energy links Twilight had set up.
They drifted into me instead, both snuggling against my form as I let us sink deeper into sleep. Letting go finally, I pulled us down into a dream instead, keeping my focus sharp as we drifted into the haze and warmth.
* * * * *
With focus and clarity, lucid dreaming was possible. Both mare's 'woke up' inside the dream almost instantly, realizing it for what it was as my consciousness stirred them. Twilight grinned over at me, nodding as I did exactly as requested and got us into a fully conscious dream. I could control everything here with great precision, which was another perk of being a cyborg, I suppose. Heck, I could probably create a framework and server for the place and run it like a video game or something. But that was silly.
Fluttershy peeked around, then smiled as she focused momentarily. The haze around us lifted, instead revealing a soft, sun-lit meadow with a nice, shady tree near us. No shadows existed here beyond that of the tree itself, I knew, and the meadow seemed to expand away forever in almost every direction. A giant mountain existed in one, however, showing the amazing spires of Canterlot off it and shining in the sun. We rested in the shade of the tree as the warm breeze drifted over us.
"Nice location, Fluttershy. It's very relaxing," Twilight muttered, exhaling softly as she settled into the soft grass.
"She had a similar spot on our first dream sojourn, but I didn't arrive in time to make it a lucid dream," I revealed, resting between the two as we formed a triangle of sorts in the shade. Fluttershy nodded and smiled, momentarily watching a butterfly drift past, bump her nose, then move on. I started adding details, animals, and sounds to the place, setting them to run on script and then ignoring it.
A light giggle sounded out, from none of us and certainly not added by me. I smiled, looking to my right as Purdue, in her filly form, trotted out of the corner of my vision, slipping up to us a bit nervously. I eased onto my side and patted the ground next to me, and she took the invitation almost immediately, pouncing and piling into my right side for support.
"Hey, little sis. How are you doing tonight?" I asked gently, remembering her request from earlier.
She grinned, a light pink tint dancing along her darker blue fur, and nuzzled into me a bit. "Wonderfully, brother. I... I'm really happy that you let me call you that. Thank you," she whispered softly, looking quite happy. I smiled and nodded to her, and Twilight giggled.
"Do you see Mender as sort of a big brother, then?" the lavender mare asked curiously, giving the little filly a start. She looked back to Twilight rather quickly, her copper mane flicking as she locked her faded, milky eyes onto my fillyfriend instead.
"Oh, well, yes. Actually, he's everything I'd wish for in a big brother. I've wanted to call him that for a while now and only got up the guts to ask today. He's oh so kind to me, and he makes me feel comfortable and safe. It's been a really, really long time since I've felt that way," she replied, looking a bit uncertain, but relaxing again. Neither mare was at all hostile, and the relaxing atmosphere really magnified that. I could tell that this was a bit outside of Purdue's comfort zone.
Fluttershy giggled a moment later before adding, "Feeling safe is a definite perk. Mender really likes to protect ponies, and knowing that, coupled with how strong he is, I know I feel really safe when I'm with him. With Twilight here, too, nothing could hurt us." I blushed lightly but couldn't deny that I liked protecting ponies. That extended infinitely more so towards the special ponies in my life. Sure, I'd fight to protect anypony, but I'd stop at absolutely nothing to ensure that my special ponies stayed safe.
They all felt it at once, Twilight grinning at my thoughts at the same time Fluttershy blushed heatedly and smiled. Purdue looked surprised as she realized those thoughts extended to her, and then blushed as well, settling in against my side even more. "I'm special, too, then? It's weird. I'm supposed to be a tool. Something to provide functional utility, but so far, you've only ever used me for really important things, or when I offer help. Plus, you care about me, not just the book's powers. It's not something I've, um, experienced before. I'm glad I got to know you after all," the filly declared, relaxing again and settling onto my foreleg like a pillow, her copper locks slipping over my leg.
"Of course I care about you, Purdue. As far and near as I can tell, you're a living being with thoughts, desires, and aspirations. Plus, you've been nice to me. You're a good pony," I assured. It was rather simple to me, honestly.
She smiled and exhaled gently again, pushing her face into my shoulder before nodding to herself. "I... You're right. I'm not technically alive, but I'm a consciousness inside of the book. I used to be alive, but I died in order to empower the Aegis Artifact. No, that's not entirely accurate. I was, um, killed to power it," she explained uneasily, frowning as she undoubtedly remembered a very unpleasant memory.
Fluttershy gasped out, almost immediately exclaiming, "That's terrible! Why would they do such a thing?!" It was still quiet, but quite a bit louder than she normally got. I'd also already suspected 'what' Purdue was, which led to the guess that she was sacrificed for the book.
Purdue herself looked momentarily surprised at the outburst before smiling shyly towards the mare. "It was, um, a long time ago, so I'm not really that upset by it anymore. I was turned into an Aegis Artifact because of my powers, however," she revealed.
"Oh? I would have suspected you'd have been quite important if you were one of the females born with a genetic power," I pointed out, tilting my head towards her. It wasn't often that a mutation worked in somepony's favor, exactly, but it wasn't unheard of for the genetic changes our magic bestowed to occasionally grant a boon to a newly born Keldarian rather than, say, a third arm. Although, if fully functional, a third arm was kinda cool, too...
She smiled shyly but shook her head. "I never told anyone. Err, anypony? Yeah. I was born blind, so they assumed I was a runt and left it at that. But then it was eventually discovered that I had, um, powers. Then I was turned into Prudentia, which magnifies them all several thousand times over," she elaborated.
"What exactly is your power, Purdue?" Twilight asked politely.
To save the little filly some energy, I answered instead with, "So far, I've seen limited control over localized spacetime, and a sort of narrative clairvoyance of sorts. Err, plus audio." Yeah, I definitely heard Sweetie as well that one time. Twilight widened her eyes a little, and Purdue giggled and nodded in agreement.
"Yeah, I can 'pause' a few individuals in spacetime, but it's extremely localized and takes a lot of energy for me. Also, I have the power of 'Narrative', my first owner called it. Um, things show up in the pages of the book, centered on my owner. He's the protagonist, so to speak," she explained. Twilight looked uncertain at this point, and Fluttershy was confused at best.
Blinking, I suggested, "Maybe an example, Purdue? They're both a big part of my life, so you should have something on one of them."
She blinked towards me, then smiled and nodded, thinking for a moment as she held her small hoof to her chin. "Hmm. Oh, I know! Twilight got her favorite doll, Smarty Pants, from her brother when she was three. She's more upset than she lets on that she lost it when she used it for the Want It, Need It spell, and hopes it will turn up at some point," she revealed a heartbeat later. Uh...
Twilight's eyes bulged out almost instantly, a light blush hitting her cheeks. "W-What?! How do you know that? Wait, I'm a part of Mender's life, so your power of 'Narrative' can... You can reveal 'exposition' about things in Mender's life that he might not know?" she asked, snapping onto Purdue's ability rather quickly.
I smiled and nodded to Twilight, but Purdue looked a bit uncertain and frowned. "I... Yes, I can. He's never actually asked me to before, though, which is, well, weird. But, I should be, um, honest. Yeah, honest," she muttered a second later. I raised an eyebrow to her, and she rapidly looked away, expression a bit on the guilty side. Uh oh.
"I don't just have the power of 'exposition'. Um, Big Mac has your doll, Twilight. He feels really guilty for taking it, but it reminds him of one he used to own as a foal that was lost in a bad fire. He repaired it for you, and intends to give it back to you for your birthday this year, but won't work up the courage because of what Fluttershy would think of him. Eighty seven percent probable," she revealed. Oh. Oh hell.
Twilight's eyes widened further, as did Fluttershy's at that. Purdue frowned a second later, however, and added, "Now it's changed. Twilight wants her doll back and is going to go confront Big Mac on it when she returns from Canterlot. He'll attempt to explain that he was just trying to fix it properly and procrastinated, but both know it's a lie. Feelings are soured, and he works himself even harder than normal that evening, trying to forgive himself. Eighty three percent probable."
"Purdue, stop," I requested softly, frowning towards her as Fluttershy squeaked, looking over towards Twilight, who softened her eyes a bit.
Purdue looked confused before I smiled at her and shook my head. "You don't need to use your powers for us. And I think they'd prefer to not know the future," I explained softly, rubbing the top of her head as I did.
She blushed a bit, looking more than a little surprised before softly nodding. "I thought you'd want me to use it more often, now that you realized that I also have 'Probability Foreshadowing'. Um, why don't you want me to use it?" she asked, looking confused now instead. That told me the ability's name, and also that she had to actively focus to use it, otherwise she'd know why I didn't want her to use it.
"You're your own individual, Purdue. You may call me Master, but I'm not. You can use your powers how you want to, not how I direct. Just... Sometimes ponies don't like knowing the future. Helping Twilight find her doll was nice of you, but you should probably leave feelings and intentions out of it when you tell somepony from now on," I suggested. I didn't want her feeling badly as she obviously didn't understand, but reading somepony's mind wasn't a good thing.
The little filly exhaled gently, resting up against me and nodding slowly. "I think I understand. It's more out of respect for Big Mac, right?" she confirmed, looking up at me after.
"Exactly. What he thinks and feels is private. Unless he chooses to tell us, it's not our business to know about it," I explained gently.
She stared at me for a long moment before smiling gently and nodding again. "Big brother is a lot different than a normal Keldarian. I, um, like this new perspective, I think," she admitted timidly, as if afraid I'd lash out and hit her for voicing an opinion. I realized at that moment that I wasn't the only one who had been scarred by a 'past life' of sorts. That existence truly was a screwed up place, and I suddenly really wanted to get Keela and her crew out of there.
"That's because I'm not a Keldarian, Purdue. And right now, you aren't either," I pointed out, gesturing towards her pony body. She looked confused for a moment, and then started giggling and smiled up at me again. Fluttershy and Twilight joined in a second later, grinning when I shot them a questioning look.
Twilight snickered once more before explaining, "Sorry. You two just look so adorable together! You're really amazing with foals, Mender." Oh? Fluttershy nodded rapidly, a warm look in her eyes that seemed familiar. I suddenly had the oddest sensation of Deja Vu, and frowned. I was supposed to be remembering something.
Purdue perked up suddenly and looked up at me with a faint frown. "Oh, I just realized, I think I stayed here too long. I'm getting a little tired, so I'm going to leave you three to your dream," she excused quickly.
"Oh, Purdue, wait!" I started to exclaim. She was gone before I could say her name, sadly, winking out of existence almost instantly. Damn it!
"Whoa, what was with the sudden departure?" Twilight asked, sounding stunned as she looked to me instead. More questions than anything swirled in my head, a memory lingering just at the tip of awareness, but lacking enough substance for me to properly recall it.
Both mares stared at me, shifting to confused as I realized I never answered. "Oh, uh, I don't know why she left. I think... I think I started to remember something else, and she was somehow causing that or something. There's a memory, but it's too faint..." I muttered, frowning afterwards. There was no point in hiding anything from them at this point.
Twilight frowned, and then shifted over towards me a bit more, resting herself against my side. "Do you remember what you were thinking about when you started to remember? Sometimes it helps to mentally backtrack a bit," she suggested gently, licking my right cheek, just along the muzzle. I blushed, momentarily snapped out of my focus as Fluttershy smiled and nodded twice, slipping over to be in front of both of us, now that they didn't need to give Purdue personal space.
Closing my eyes, Fluttershy's expression shot into my mind almost instantly, and I shivered. "You made the comment about foals, and Fluttershy gave me a look. It was warm, um, and I got a sense of Deja Vu from it which triggered the memory," I revealed, ears perking up as I looked up at the two of them. Twilight looked a bit confused still, but Fluttershy actually smiled and nodded.
"Yes, I was thinking about what an amazing father you'd be, and, um, how I wouldn't mind having your foal," she admitted, shifting to a darker flush as she gave me a shy smile. I felt my face heat up as well, but smiled and nodded towards her. That was a warm thought indeed.
It shot through my mind in an instant. She screamed at me to stop over and over again, tears flowing down her cheeks. I could barely see her. Flames rushed all around me, and the vision of two great wings expanding outwards filled everything with light. They snapped down into a single mighty flap, and then it was gone.
I gave a start, Fluttershy's outburst ringing in my ear as I stared into the mare's eyes, her expression confused instead. What was...? I have to remember, huh? "Mender, are you okay?" Twilight asked, sounding rather concerned. The sky had darkened overhead, and I frowned, shifting it back to clear and sunny in an instant.
"Ah, sorry. I think I'm starting to remember it a bit, but it's tiring," I excused softly, feeling fatigued from the simple memory, somehow.
"You should stop straining yourself. Let's just enjoy the rest of our dream, okay? Um, do you think I could try something?" the lavender mare asked curiously.
I raised my eyebrow to her, but nodded. She grinned almost instantly, and I suddenly doubted exactly how healthy that consent had been. Fluttershy looked just as apprehensive, but Twilight stood promptly and looked towards what felt suddenly like the 'north'. She'd oriented us, I realized.
The ground blurred away as we suddenly shot up and along a mountain path at several hundred miles an hour. Fluttershy let out a squeak and hopped over the 'nothingness' and into me, and I smiled, stabilizing the image of a 'flying carpet' under us. It was just for show, of course, but Fluttershy relaxed and felt along it as we flew. Twilight was tracing her own memories, I realized, and from our angle through the mountains, this looked like a train route.
My eyes widened as the sun shifted overhead and we exited out into a great valley, expanding off into the distance with its flatness, accented only by the mountains frozen beyond. Light snow fell around us, and Fluttershy instinctively pushed closer to me, even though it wasn't cold. I watched the sun glisten across the freshly fallen snow as we zoomed along, our target in the distance fairly obvious. It was a massive spire, made entirely of crystal, by the looks of it. Similar smaller structures expanded from its base a dozen miles out at least, and I knew immediately that this had to be the 'Crystal Empire', where Cadance and Shining ruled.
"Oooh, you wanted to visit here?" Fluttershy asked, eyes dancing as she stuck her tongue out to catch one of the flakes of snow zipping past. She gave a start when I made it 'real' to her, the sensation of the snow hitting her tongue and slowly melting.
"Heh. Yup! This is the Crystal Empire, as I'm sure you've already guessed," Twilight introduced, turning back to face me as we zipped along, rapidly heading towards the spire. I smiled and nodded to her, earning a grin. "How about Fluttershy and I give you the grand tour?" she offered next, sounding excited.
Smiling, I returned her nod before asking, "Does it include an example of the consistency of the Crystal Palace?"
Twilight blinked before widening her eyes and whipping around again, the side of the massive crystal spire blurring up faster than I could blink. Amidst a sigh, I put up an Aegis Barrier around us and took control again, just as we collided...
* * * * *
Smiling, we watched the sun slowly set, sitting on the very upper rim of the Crystal Palace. I took another lick from my frozen popsicle that obviously wasn't real, and enjoyed the sensation of Fluttershy snuggling into my right side. On the other side of her, Twilight sat as well, licking her own popsicle. The sky expanded out into a full orange miasma of hues, bathing us in light as we leaned against the tip of the spire. So far, the tour had been amazing, minus putting that new two-meter wide hole in the side of the palace, and Twilight acting sheepish for a while. Fluttershy was oddly more freaked out that we'd destroyed a section of the architecture rather than almost getting flattened into the consistency of pancake batter, but insisted that she knew she was safe when I was around. Personally, I think she just said it to make me blush, which worked in spades. Heh.
"I kind of wish the dream would never end. But we have to wake up soon, don't we?" Fluttershy asked softly, her wings giving a light flutter behind her as the sun slowly sank below the horizon.
I smiled, nodding softly as she rested against me. "It's a very peaceful dream, and the company is top notch, but our other friends would miss us," I pointed out.
Twilight smiled softly at that before giving her popsicle a final lick and tossing it off the edge. Heh. She gave the sky a sad gaze for a moment before nodding oh so slowly. "It's true. With all the work coming up in the future, I don't know when we'll get to just have a vacation again. Mender needs one most of all, and I don't think starting all the things involved with the organization right away is a good idea. How about we just take a break when we get back to Ponyville?"
Fluttershy stared at her in surprise for a moment before asking, "Um, are you feeling okay, Twilight? You've been awfully stressed and you might be coming down with a fever or-"
"Heh. Yes, I'm fine, Fluttershy. I know, I know. It's not normal for me to condone not working, but..." she interrupted, trailing off with a frown. Fluttershy was right, of course. Normally she'd be in the position to argue just getting all the work over with, despite the crazy amount of it involved.
The lavender mare hesitated for another long moment, scratching her hoof along the surface of the crystal we sat on, and then sighed. "Okay, I give. I'm not good with figuring out my feelings, so I'm just going to be honest. Those last two or three days of estrus, I kind of went nuts," she revealed. Uh...
We both gave her a blank stare, and she rolled her eyes, blushing lightly before defending, "Don't look so surprised! Sheesh. Okay, yeah, that much was obvious, but I didn't explain why, now did I?" Well, that's true. I just kind of assumed, and hadn't heard it directly from her mouth.
"Um, it was because I ran away, right? And because of the form being sent out?" Fluttershy guessed softly, tilting her head sideways as she regarded the mare. Yeah, that's what I had assumed. She was worried that I'd be angry, and that Fluttershy had been disappointed.
Twilight frowned and exhaled softly before shaking her head, surprising me. "Not exactly. I mean, I was really sad that you were gone when I woke up, but I thought you had to go check on your animals early or something. Then I saw the form I'd left in the kitchen where we were talking about it and signed it, and stuck it in the envelope to be safe until Mender got back," she elaborated. Eh?
"After I did that, I tried to focus on my experiments in the basement, but I couldn't focus. What I did with Fluttershy was weighing heavily on my mind, and I realized at some point that you might not approve of what we did. Then I realized that you probably wouldn't approve, as that was why we technically sent you to the cabins in the first place. Then, after I started to panic, I ran up and checked the herd contract again, noticing that it said it was based off consummation, which, while being a really old fashioned concept, still meant that I'd probably have to have sex with you before you could sign it. Fluttershy, too, of course," she continued, starting to fidget and actually working herself up with the story about her working herself up. It was kind of ironic, in a tragic sense.
Fluttershy blushed lightly, but Twilight shook her head and raised her hoof towards us again before continuing with, "I didn't think I was ready to mate with a male, and the thought still terrifies me, but that's not the point or reason of me telling you this. I stewed on that little bit for the better part of that day, realizing that not only would you probably be upset and that I'd have to officially mate with you, but we already tore off the carbon copy of the paper. It was so tempting to just tear it up and request another copy, but I was worried Fluttershy would be sad or take it the wrong way because she already signed it, so I didn't know what to do. Things got a bit blurred as the hormones kicked in again, sadly. Keeping it in the envelope turned out to be a bad idea, as I must have sent it out on accident with the rest of the book return notices the next day. At that point I was out of it, but I take full responsibility for what happened."
So it was an accident, then. Twilight's horrified and guilt-ridden expression probably could have told me that without the story, but it was nice to have the clarity. I opened my mouth to remind her that nothing drastic was going to happen, when she lifted her hoof again and shuddered, taking a few deep breathes. "Not done yet. I... I need to say this last part. I lost it. I totally lost it in blind panic. It took me two hours to find the rules and regulations for Herds, and when I saw that it took a full month to append somepony to one, I shot right into believing that it was all over. There was no way in my mind that you'd forgive either one of us for it, and I was going to get dumped. The prospect absolutely horrified me, and.... Well, I'm embarrassed to admit that I tried thinking up literally anything I could to convince you to give us another chance. Love potions, spells, and more mundane things like making myself into your slave for the rest of eternity. Uh, I kind of went crazy," she repeated.
Blinking, I swallowed uneasily, remembering that she'd mentioned several potions she had ready for me from her upside down spot on the ceiling. She held up both hooves at Fluttershy's horrified look, and shook her head rapidly, adding, "I know! It was crazy, and he never would have agreed to that, and I wasn't going to give him the potions once I snapped out of it! I just... I panicked. Pure panic. But it's important, because looking back at it now, I realized I panicked." Oh...? That didn't seem like a good thing. Fluttershy relaxed a bit, and suddenly smiled, realizing something I didn't, apparently.
Twilight's eyes softened at that and she stood again, moving past Fluttershy and snuggling into my front, lightly pushing me backwards until she slipped fully into my lap. This was a not entirely unwelcome change of tone, and it surprised me, but I kept my mouth shut as she finished with, "I panicked, just like I would have if Princess Celestia had told me that I failed and wasn't her student anymore. Looking back, I realized that was as honest with myself as I'd ever been. I care about you, Mender. You mean an amazing amount to me and now, I don't want to be without you. Ever. That's why I'm going to step up and fix this. Everything. I've been a horrible fillyfriend to you and Fluttershy, and I'm done with that. From now on, I'm going to treat you two right." Oh... I knew why she was panicking, but was it really to that extent? Fluttershy frowned almost instantly, and I saw it coming.
"N-No, Twilight! You've been amazing to me so far. I'm sorry I got scared and ran away. It was just... I felt so guilty that we'd done that without him, and I felt sick because of it. You didn't do anything wrong to me, but neither of us should have signed that paper without Mender there. We weren't thinking clearly at all, and now we both need to fix it. P-Please don't try to take all the blame, Twilight," she pleaded softly, slipping up against my side and nuzzling Twilight's cheek for good measure. Those eyes! I knew I wouldn't be able to say no to Fluttershy like that, and wondered if Twilight had built up more of a tolerance to the-
"F-Fluttershy... It, but, it wasn't you who sent... I... I know. Fine, let's both make it up to him, okay?" Twilight suggested, caving in before I could even finish the thought. Well, I guess that answered that.
Shrugging, I decided to admit, "While I momentarily, during the height of my anger, entertained the thought of cutting off and just letting you two be with each other, I didn't stay angry for long and I'm not going to leave either of you unless you tell me to." She was being honest and deserved the same.
Twilight swallowed uneasily and nodded to me, pushing herself more into my lap and exhaling softly. Her warm fur felt amazing against mine, and I held her close as Fluttershy snuggled into my right side, against both of us. She looked a bit sad, but nodded alongside Twilight, whispering, "I understand, Mender. I know you, well, think that it's your job to, but you don't need to hide things inside anymore. We talked about it for a while and realized how, um, angry you were with us. I can feel it still inside of you, Mender. Let us help you ease that."
Ease it? I knew what she was talking about instantly, and it was a credit to her skills at reading ponies to be able to pick up on something even I barely noticed. Of course, they were both literally inside my mind at the moment, so maybe proximity made it easier? Still, how did one go about easing anger away?
"I wouldn't call it anger exactly. It's frustration. A deeply rooted frustration and sadness over everything so far. A lot of things aren't exactly ideal for me, and undoubtedly for you two either. I get that accidents happen, which was why I'm willing to just swallow it and take the three years 'appended' status if I have to. I mean, it's just a title, right?" I explained hesitantly, earning the two negative bursts almost instantly, as I'd been anticipating. Still, their consistency made me happy, anyway.
"No, Mender. We're going to fix this as soon as physically possible tomorrow. You know that even if it wasn't our fault directly, I don't like leaving things unsettled if I can help it," Twilight pointed out, backing up a bit so she could look into my eyes fully. I sighed and looked away from her, only to be greeted with a similar expression from Fluttershy as well.
"She's right. Not only will it hopefully prove to you that we're serious, it will put us all on equal ground again. Then we can focus properly on working out that frustration," she added, smiling afterwards.
Okay, I couldn't help myself any further. "Uh, how exactly does one work out anger? Um, we didn't have anything in my world to deal with psychological issues, so this is kind of new to me..." I warned, giving a sheepish look towards Twilight, who suddenly dropped her jaw.
"S-Seriously? Wait, no, I should have anticipated that. It actually explains quite a bit," the lavender mare muttered a moment later before promptly slapping her forehead with a forehoof.
Fluttershy giggled lightly and leaned into me a bit more before whispering, "With lots and lots of tender loving care, until you can't help but feel amazing and all your tension just drifts away. Oh, it'll be lovely, and I can't wait." That was followed by a blush and peck to my cheek, and I couldn't help but blush as well, sensing at least a 'part' of what she planned on doing already. I had no idea how to handle this sort of thing, as getting gifts or special treatment was a bit foreign to me. My entire stay in Equestria had been awkward like that, as I realized I'd always been 'different' from others. Not always in a good light, of course.
"Uh, y-you probably won't need much. I don't hold onto a grudge or anything, and it-" I quickly started to correct.
Twilight grinned before shutting me up with a kiss directly to the muzzle, and I squeaked before she backed away and shook her head. "Don't even try it, Mister! You'll be getting lots of affection whether you like it or not. Honestly, Fluttershy's right. Once I get over my initial fear of, um, mating with a male, it will probably be just as amazing as mating with a female is," she concluded, tone getting more and more flustered as she went, even reverting back to more formal terms. Heh. She'd never change.
Fluttershy blushed furiously at that, of course, and fidgeted against me before I fully realized the implication of what Twilight just said. Oh! Ha! I raised a playful eyebrow towards the yellow mare, and she got even more flustered, looking away from both of us as I snickered. "She really is amazing, isn't she?" I agreed playfully.
The lavender mare on my lap started giggling again, but Fluttershy outright squeaked finally and flailed her hooves lightly towards me, shaking her head rapidly. "I'm not t-that amazing! Um, you two are both amazing instead. That's why I really, uh, like it. Plus, these hormones are horrible this year. I think I'm being affected by being in a herd, too," she finally excused.
Twilight smiled softly towards her and nodded, agreeing with, "It makes sense. I think it's more of a psychological thing than anything. Your body knows it has, uh, availability now, so you feel the urges even more strongly. Um, that's why tomorrow night I think, um, I think I want to experiment a little bit with Mender, too. Do you think you could help us, Fluttershy?" Eh?!
Fluttershy looked just as surprised as me, as the suggestion totally blindsided me. "You want me to help? I, well, oh! I think I understand. I've been with, um, both of you, so yeah, I think I can help ease things a bit," she agreed, blushing lightly but smiling at the thought. Well then, this was a bit awkward. Suddenly, I realized that mentally I must have gotten a bit 'interested' in the aspect after all.
Twilight started to smile towards Fluttershy and nod, but stopped a second later, frowning as she started to look down instead. I quickly shifted, moving the mare off my lap as I flipped over onto my stomach instead. My face felt like it could fry an egg and I shuddered, distinctly looking away from the confused looking Fluttershy and the now furiously blushing Twilight, who apparently realized what had happened.
"Uh, yeah. I'm just going to wake us up now. It's oh nine hundred hours anyways," I suggested weakly. Twilight just nodded quickly, causing Fluttershy to frown at the both of us, but I didn't bother waiting. The less time I lingered, the less time the situation had to stew into further awkwardness. With no other delays, I focused momentarily and flicked myself back into consciousness, hauling both mares along with me. Please... Please have rolled over as I slept, body...
LOLNOPE
Great chapter as always
How much in story time has passed from the beginning of Memory Pending to current? It's hard to tell when there are multiple chapters narrating a single evening.
Every single time Purdue is in a chapter, I just wanna squish her cheeks and make that "looking at a cute thing" face. You know, that one.
She's just too adorable.
Heh... Mender's got morning wood!!!
This poor guy, always having to deal with all of these crazy problems
Oh dear. Things are getting so confusing and frustrating for Twilight and Mender. At least Fluttershy is happy, we dont want her going out of control.
That fucking ending!
Mender....................
Ah, morning wood. Plaguing man since the dawn of time. Somepony can help him with that little issue
nothing Fluttershy wont fix when they wake up
Ah morning wood my old friend, you make life super awkward sometimes.
For some reason I get the feeling that all this buildup over the form is going to end with them being told that there is a week grace period after estrus.
That or Twilight will get her name in the paper again. woo more explosions.
Okay, I give up. I tried figuring it out, but I can't.
Kiro, please tell me what goes through your head when you write things like this. In the dream, when Twilight's talking about "making it up" to Mender, she almost word for word repeats things she has said at least three times before. She's not an exception in this, either; Fluttershy and Mender also give the same lines they've given plenty of times before. I can find nothing past Purdue's appearance, which could've easily been put into another chapter, I'd say, that justifies the existence of this chapter. I implore you, Kiro, please tell me what the thought process is behind such a scene - how you justify having characters repeat almost exactly the same conversations over and over. Quite frankly, this chapter and many before it, have been an absolute chore to read through - mostly because of all the repetition - and I'm almost at my wit's end. I really don't want to stop reading this story; I know you can do better - I loved Memories Pending, and even this story up to the point where Mender is hospitalized after his fight with Nirru - but with every chapter, it's getting harder and harder to justify my continued reading to myself. At some point, I'm not gonna be able to any more.
4154110
Hmmmmmmm...
I get where you are coming from, and the point is valid, though I think this chapter gets more of a repitition-pass than some others. With this one, we also got Mender attempting to show the other two fear his cybernetics and failing, instead finding she fears his control over her. The explanation of the exact chain of events on Twilight's end during estrus did clear a few questions on how the form sent and her thought process. Also that Mender would be fine never getting into Censorship territory with Twilight, he can wait. That said, I still see your point here.
I've always hated stories where characters don't explain their views or feelings and it leads to avoidable events or misunderstandings. Pending does the opposite in spades. Characters are prone to explain things out and try to reconcile with each other. It fits the title, forgiveness is required in multiple cases but even explaining everything will not earn it so quickly.
But, then again, there are the links. Now that all three are webbed, a lot of this should carry through them. Their thoughts, feelings, and intentions should be conveyed by link to each other. Even if the links do not give everything, they should give enough that not too much talk is necessary. That is especially true with Fluttershy being one of them, repeatedly noted as the most skilled at utilizing the link.
I also am a bit wary of these chapters, but not in the same way as you. Around chapter 22, there was a slow chapter of just Mender and Twilight in their room after the Gala. Not much happened, there was some repeated intentions and discussions, and in the end only a little relationship progression occurred. It seemed like filler. Cue chapter 24 and 25, Nirru. Without the small changes from that "filler", Mender would not have caught on to the switch so easily. Since then I've given some chapters like these a pass in terms of how much progression occurred because it may pack something for the future.
Recently I've wondered about the end of Pending. It is still a ways off, but how it will end is a curious thought. The point of Forgiveness is Mender getting past his past (hah) and settling down in his new life. There might be some climactic battle to give a grand finale. Or there might not be. We might get an ending where things settle down, certain things are finalized, and life goes on. If that is the case, the mundane and the repitition will kick in and it'll close out with chapters like these. We already got a taste for that through the extra chapter. However, we're not near the end. Many mysteries to solve, many events to attend, many wounds to mend (I demand more AJ feelzies), and a government division to establish. A lot to do, not much reason to slow down to talk and reinforce already known points. So, unless this chapter does have more to it like 22(?) did, it probably should not have been like this in terms of repitition at the current point in the story.
I guess... I guess I'm saying I understand your view but am not agreeing with it nor combatting it.
4148075 from menders ramblings I want to say not quite a month but don't quote me on that.
Welp, just spent the last four days catching up on this monster, but it was definitely worth. Memory Pending? Original, clever, and heartfelt. I'd recommend it to all my friends on the site.
However as 4158448 and 4154110 have noted, Forgiveness Pending is 650K words of Hurt/Comfort. That's a lot of hurting and comforting. it gets a bit repetitive and predictable at times, but for the most part the plot elements and scenes seem to come at just the pace before my interest starts to slip. I wouldn't say this is necessarily a bad thing, but it's not for everyone. It's plot seems very drawn out especially considering the "Adventure" tag (oh um... If you'll take my opinion as a reader.)
regardless I very much enjoyed rubbing my feelings raw on this fic, Mender's a pretty kind, honest, and sensitive guy but he also bottles and represses emotions like any other person. I don't even know how many times I've gotten a sympathetic sinking feeling with Mender, only the author knows how many more times I'll gladly do it again.
I'd also like to note on the very disciplined upload schedule. One chapter every Monday with an average of one break each month? That's dedication I can appreciate!
Quick edit before I forget: Really... Grosh? Please, you might as well have made this a spore crossover and kept the original name.
4177776
She's not an alicorn. There are some references to her as a "princess," but that is solely due to her connections to Shining Armor and Cadence. It is the same level of royalty that allows Blueblood to be a "prince."
Kiro, have you studied/are you studying Interdimensional Travel/Space Engineering or something of the sort? I mean, a lot of the technology in the story I can understand because of the (very well inserted) explanations for it all, but there are always these bits and pieces that I can't grasp because they're just that complicated/advanced. I'm not telling you to take it out, I love it because it's advanced and complicated and I have to actually think to understand it, but I'm just wondering if it's something you specialize in or if you're getting all of this knowledge of advanced machinery from looking it up just for the purposes of this story.
4154110
I don't know about your experiences but I've seen this before. When a couple has a conversation or fight and then go round and round in circles. I've seen my brother and his wife do it. Gives me this creepy sense of déjà vu. Probably doesn't help but it does happen.
Mender, generally when you sleep in a specific position (such as sitting up, hugging a large object, or having your eyes open [which really sucks upon waking up] ) or in something oddly shaped but still comfy you don't usually move much. Have fun with embarrassing awkwardness!
Holy mother of Luna.
650,000 words? Jesus christ, I'll be busy with this story for a WHILE!
Loved the prequel, so I have a feeling this will absolutely make my week.
4158448 Before I get to any actual point, I want to say something not entirely related. If you (or anyone else, for that matter) have any objections to anything in any of my comments, please don't be afraid to start arguing me. Arguing my opinions with people is one of the very few ways I can improve them. All right, on to more relevant things now.
You say clearing up what Twilight fears is a relevant thing explained in chapter 66. I can't argue. This is something I overlooked when writing my precious comment. However, then you say it had to be explained that Mender could wait to have sex with Twilight. There, I have to disagree. Mender quite often emphasizes how lucky he feels to be in a relationship with "such lovely mares." Expecting any more out of that relationship would be so far out of character for him, I would call it character assassination. Assuming the audience expects Mender to do exactly that, or even thinks of it as a possibility is kinda insulting to me, to be perfectly honest.
Actually, I find that characters in this story forgive others extraordinarily quickly. Usually before they've even got that elaborate explanation you talk about.
The reason you are quick to forgive these filler chapters is actually the same reason I have kept reading up to this point. When things go down in this story, it goes from one of the worst, most repetitive stories I've ever seen, to one of the best pieces of action fan-fiction I've ever seen.
The last thing I wanted to say has some connection to my last paragraph. You say there's a whole slew of unexplored facets of this story unexplored, and I couldn't agree more. That's actually what most pisses me off about these filler chapters. From those chapters, it seems like Kiro has run out of things to write about and is just stalling until he gets new ideas, when in reality there are plenty of interesting avenues left. That really frustrates me.
4187548
I must admit to confusion on what you are trying to say here. If you are saying (as I am currently interpreting) that he never expected to get any further, is satisfied with what he has gotten, and we (the audience) in general expect a Censorship chapter with Twi even though one shouldn't happen, then I agree to a point. Mender actually saying he won't clearly to Twilight is both a definative statement so Twilight has no misunderstandings and an idea he may not have fully committed to until speaking it. Now Mender might have a tempting moment then think "I can't go back on my word." Whether that is the case, we'll see.
The quick forgiveness varies. In some cases that is definitely the truth. In others, still a ways to go. Main examples at current are Mender's subconscious annoyance and Applejack still having nightmares.
As for what's to come, many conversations have led to knowing Kiro has a lot planned out and yet to write. Whether he has all the big moments plotted and is filling in the gaps or whether he has a series bible of everything and is marking off what we learn from what we haven't yet, he definitely has plans to come. How he spaces out those events (prior or to come) is more where your frustration comes from. Varying levels of like, I enjoy, you're mixed tolerate and enjoy, and the sum is the same thing from before we agree on about the what we should see at this point in the story.
4193829 You're close to what I was trying to say there. I was trying to say it has already been made very clear to us that Mender wouldn't want to have intercourse with Twilight, because he's already more than satisfied with his situation. Having him specifically say that in this chapter is redundant, I think.
I think I've kind of figured out the forgiveness thing. Every character in this story forgives others in a heartbeat, but can't forgive themselves. Not unrealistic, but I think some spirals of self-accusation have been going on a bit too long at this point.
Of course Kiro has a lot planned; this story has a myriad (disclaimer: not actually 10,000) of unresolved plot-threads. I just wished Kiro would get on tying some of them up.
You know eating sweets in a dream could have very psychological downsides. The brain expects all the sugar and such and is teased to not get it. The brain then becomes more inclined to eat sweets leading to more addiction and dependence on them. This can lead to a very unhealthy diet. So Mender should be careful with that or they might start eating like Pinkie. Ya know, if this story wasn't entirely dependent on what you write.
Ha! Pre-Morning wood!!!
Classic
4471193
Morning Glory!!!
Fucking hell twi, that’s a relationship! That doesn’t qualify as scared of him in this situation! Sometimes this mare frustrates me so much.