Thirty Minute Express Train to Story Town

by Predhack

Not For the Dogs

“As we get older, all of us, our body starts to go through… changes. Not bad changes! Just, different stuff. Some of it’s even good. You get bigger, and stronger. And as it happens you might start to noticin’ others more in a new and different way than you did before. And sometimes these feelin’s can come on really strong at first,” Applejack held up a hoof to stop an incoming interruption and continued speaking, “Now, I know you may have heard some things from other ponies and places around but I think you need to hear this from me so you can understand how important it is.”

Winona heeded the raised hoof and lowered her butt back to the ground as Applejack continued on. She’d tried more than once now to leave, but Applejack seemed to think that she needed to share this information with her, even though she’d heard about most of this when she was a puppy. From a much more experienced speaker who didn’t blush while trying to describe how exactly she was going to have to interact with the sire of her pups.

This was the second most embarrassing thing Winona had ever seen her friend do. Right after the time she had tried to present to the stinky white pony. For some reason she’d tried to talk to the stinky white pony instead of just demonstrating her willingness in the traditional fashion. “TALKING!” Really, that was no way to conduct a courtship. If your chosen mate doesn’t understand what you want you demonstrate, you don’t spend two hours explaining how you think they’re pretty and trying to get them to go hunting with you for dinner. Or… whatever it was ponies did.

Winona sighed as Applejack, ever more visibly uncomfortable, had escalated to using gestures to try and explain the finicky bits of mating without saying any of the proper words. It was probably for the best anyway, Winona thought. If Applejack was this immature in her approach to mating then she really had no business trying to start a courtship to that end. Winona would of course have offered to help but she had personal reservations against the stinky pony that went beyond the stinky pony’s desire to cover her beautiful natural odor with chemicals. Really, what kind of person feels the need to hide their nature given scent unless they’re eluding predators or something? And even then one doesn’t hide it by covering oneself in stink, that’s just disgusting.

Stinky pony could be forgiven, Winona supposed, for her poor ability to act naturally. She was after all host to a terrible parasitic infection after all. Oh, how Winona loathed the white beast. Someday on one of the group hunts Applejack took her to with all of Applejack’s friends hunting companions they would finally down the horrid menace. That would be a good day.

Applejack had sidetracked into a talk about how to determine who was worth mating with. Winona shifted in her seat, agitated, and huffed her annoyance at Applejack’s presumption that she knew how to choose a mate. Granted, her own pool of mates was shallow, though still containing some obvious choice of the speedy flying pony with the yellow, gray,blue and purple mane, with her obvious physical fitness. And the other obvious choice of angelic yellow pony, who was angelic yellow pony and really need no further talking up.

Alas, Winona whined, love strikes where it will. And though her companion had made a poor choice Winona couldn’t fault her for it. She herself had once fallen for a burly little bulldog with the most atrocious behavior but excellent wit. And he was handsome besides. Some days she regretted not getting to know him better before one of those voodoo witch doctors that they called “vets” had gotten to him. He’d never been the same after that. Hopefully she’d meet some nice dog the next time she was in the mood. Being a working hound though the opportunity to pursue her own romantic endeavors never seemed to come up.

Winona glanced again at Applejack, having given up trying to follow her meandering speech, and laid down, putting her paws over her head to block out the noise. How sad, she thought, that I’m going to be four years old soon and I’ve never had a single puppy. It’s almost disgraceful. Winona flinched at that thought and pointed her mind at it angrily, her movement coinciding with Applejack admonishing her for not listening close enough to convince the pony that Winona was indeed still listening.

The idea that she was a worse dog for having never found time for puppies. Who had put that fool thought in her head? She was a working dog. And she was quite proud of the work she and Applejack did. If she hadn’t found time yet for puppies then oh well, her time was important. Maybe in the future she’d be able to take the time necessary, for now her companion and, if she was honest with herself, her pony pack needed her. And that was just as good as puppies.

She sat up and looked at Applejack who appeared to be winding down.

“And that’s, um… it,” Appljack scratched her head with a hoof, “Didja get all that?”

Winona blinked at her, embarrassment at her distraction rising in her.

“It’s just, I figure I’ve gotta explain this to Applebloom someday soon and I want your opinion on how you think I’ll do.”

Understanding crushed her embarrassment and Winona fell on her back and writhed with silent doggy laughter. It wasn’t polite, but she couldn’t help it.

“You’re a big help,” Applejack said with a flat glare at the frolicsome hound.

Winona just laughed harder than flipped back to her feet and invited Applejack to come play with her. Playing was the best way to learn all the important things in life, and once they started Winona was sure that Applejack would begin to understand.

Applejack let out a puff of laughter and scratched Winona’s ears. “Alright, y’great varmint. Let’s go. I guess I have time to worry about this later.”

Winona barked her agreement and leaped forward to tag Applejack before darting away. This was her work, and puppies could wait until she’d properly educated the young pony members of her pack.

Author's Note:

The prompt: Sitting down to have The Talk.

The pet things continued for a little while after the theme week. Just because I could. I really liked how this one turned out mostly.

http://thirtyminuteponies.tumblr.com/post/37724655927/prompt-194-compilation-the-facts-of-life

Comments

[BlueGenome]

I liked this.