Oh boy. Poor Trixie and poor Fluttershy. You know Applejack is going to find Fluttershy, then lead a lynch mob to find the culprit. Only to find her already hanging from a tree (so to speak). I'm on pins and needles now. Please bring on the next chapter.
Just... wow. I instantly had to read this the moment I saw it posted, and already can't wait for the next chapter... but at the same time, you can't rush perfection. Keep up the amazing writing and we'll be eagerly awaiting your next update!
I'm not gonna lie, I'm not sure how I feel about this eventually having sexual content... I just feels so complete already I don't really think it needs it, but you're still one of my favorite authors so all the more reason to critique you, so I'll call you out if it feels unnecessary when we get there. Until then enjoying the story and I'd rather have a long wait for a great update then a short wait for a mediocre one.
Almost first, but I got interrupted. Oh well, great writing and a good sized chapter. Just remember, after it is complete, no one cares how long it took. Only how well it is written.
It is bad what happened to Fluttershy but she should know that a scared, hurt animal will lash out if startled. She should have known to announce her presence in a way before she got too close. The true tragedy of the incident is the effect it had on Trixie.
Great chapter, magnificent . Best sad fic I have read in a long time.
It is bad what happened to Fluttershy but she should know that a scared, hurt animal will lash out if startled. She should have known to announce her presence in a way before she got too close. The true tragedy of the incident is the effect it had on Trixie.
Great chapter, magnificent . Best sad fic I have read in a long time.
1510234 Absolutely, I'd agree that Fluttershy didn't really think things through very well. All will be addressed in the next few chapters! Anyhow, really glad you're enjoying it so much.
1510182 Actually, the sexual content in this story is something I've meant to bring up for a while now. The one thing I really want to stress is that this story is absolutely not a clopfic. By that, I mean it's not going to be a storyline that's ultimately an excuse to include sex scenes. (Not saying these can't be done well; look at Romance Reports, for instance.) Anyone who's followed this story expecting consistent sexiness will be disappointed. The main reason for the M-rating is because of 2, maybe 3 scenes which are going to crop up in the latter half of the story, and are actually relevant to the narrative. The whole story is largely a psychological battle between altruistic and erotic romance, which is obviously connected with Trixie's need to rebuild a better personality for herself.
I don't know, I may be wrong, but I feel that It'd leave the plot and characterizations lacking in depth and impact if I were to censor the more intimate parts, largely because they're bound to have such a profound effect on Trixie's psyche. Obviously I can't give out details on the whys and wherefores without doling out massive spoilers. However, the bottom line is that this isn't a story about sex. What it is is a story about psychological healing and damage, with a focus on romance/obsession, and obviously sexuality is a very, very important part of that.
As I say, that's my view on the whole thing, but please do let me know if you think the M-rated stuff comes across as gratuitous or off-putting. As always, huge thanks for the feedback, and it's good to know you're liking the story!
Ohmygosh, and I thought the third chapter ended in cliffhanger style. This one is much more emotional and breathtaking. Wonderful chapter - can't wait to see more! And I think I get it now: the reason for such pacing, somepony could name slow. it's the growing anticipation that makes a yet-to-come-romance so long awaited. Step by step, thought by thought we wander into the inner world of our characters - Trixie and Flutters both - and can't help sharing their thoughts and desires, phantasies, fears and expectations. Maybe again it's me being so sensitive and susceptible, but I take this story and characters very close to my heart. And speaking about M-rating - at this point everything that's gonna happen between Shy and Trixie won't be a simple sexual intercourse, and not just an act of love and devotion - but kind of a turning point, breaking their past lives to pieces, creating new personalities, open for new a brand new world. Catharsis - yes, I can't think of better definition. It gonna take a real mastery to depict even the sauciest of scenes with care and caution, to show not only the physical side of making love, but a deep spiritual meaning of it. And I'm more than sure you can make it! And thus I think deleting any romantic and saucy M-scenes gonna left something unsaid, as if a word or two had been thrown away from your favourite song. Or a cherry taken from a top of a pie - though this cherry isn't the very reason we enjoy this delicious pie, right ?;)
Woah, that ending isn't going to get over well with AJ/the rest of the Apple family/anyone else.
I find the backstory of AJ & Dash being ex-marefriends to be interesting, I'm not sure I've seen a post breakup mane 6 relationship in a fic before. One where they breakup in the middle of the story, usually as the main ship the fic is about, sure, seen that plenty. But this seems new to me.
I love this very figuratively way of describing you have. At a few points I, as someone who doesn't speak English as a first language, had to stop and think a little bit more about the meanings, but it was beautiful nonetheless, even though it disrupted the flow for me. I still haven't figured out completely what you meant with, " She had been thrown a line, or perhaps an olive branch," An exact explanation would be very nice. The throwing a line part means helping someone who is in trouble. This I figured right away, but the olive branch is as far as I know a sign of victory or peace, and I couldn't really tell so far that Fluttershy and Trixie were fighting ^^.
1515121 The olive branch in this case is, indeed, being used as a reference to peace. Not really in the sense of 'making peace' after a conflict, but more in the sense that Fluttershy's offering Trixie peace after a difficult life. Sorry, that's probably a really bad way of putting it. Idioms are weird things!
A commercial one. Or it's just big enough you haven't stumbled onto their personal garden plot, not that there's much growing underneath two feet of snow.
she had no wish to force this delicate, innocent mare to suffer at the hooves of a half-deranged stalker.
There's something delicious about the self-deprecation here.
Have a chapter! Sorry this one took so much time; I never expected it to come out this lengthy, to be honest.
Anyway, enjoy!
Oh boy. Poor Trixie and poor Fluttershy. You know Applejack is going to find Fluttershy, then lead a lynch mob to find the culprit. Only to find her already hanging from a tree (so to speak).
I'm on pins and needles now. Please bring on the next chapter.
Just... wow. I instantly had to read this the moment I saw it posted, and already can't wait for the next chapter... but at the same time, you can't rush perfection. Keep up the amazing writing and we'll be eagerly awaiting your next update!
I'm not gonna lie, I'm not sure how I feel about this eventually having sexual content... I just feels so complete already I don't really think it needs it, but you're still one of my favorite authors so all the more reason to critique you, so I'll call you out if it feels unnecessary when we get there. Until then enjoying the story and I'd rather have a long wait for a great update then a short wait for a mediocre one.
Almost first, but I got interrupted. Oh well, great writing and a good sized chapter. Just remember, after it is complete, no one cares how long it took. Only how well it is written.
Can't wait though.
Oh man, this chapter.
It is bad what happened to Fluttershy but she should know that a scared, hurt animal will lash out if startled. She should have known to announce her presence in a way before she got too close.
The true tragedy of the incident is the effect it had on Trixie.
Great chapter, magnificent . Best sad fic I have read in a long time.
Oh man, this chapter.
It is bad what happened to Fluttershy but she should know that a scared, hurt animal will lash out if startled. She should have known to announce her presence in a way before she got too close.
The true tragedy of the incident is the effect it had on Trixie.
Great chapter, magnificent . Best sad fic I have read in a long time.
Damn you... a cliffhanger!
Now I am gonna be hungry for the next chapter... no, not hungry for it, but starving!
I shall endure though, so that when I do read the next chapter, it will be just as wonderful as all the others.
1510234 Absolutely, I'd agree that Fluttershy didn't really think things through very well. All will be addressed in the next few chapters! Anyhow, really glad you're enjoying it so much.
1510182 Actually, the sexual content in this story is something I've meant to bring up for a while now. The one thing I really want to stress is that this story is absolutely not a clopfic. By that, I mean it's not going to be a storyline that's ultimately an excuse to include sex scenes. (Not saying these can't be done well; look at Romance Reports, for instance.) Anyone who's followed this story expecting consistent sexiness will be disappointed. The main reason for the M-rating is because of 2, maybe 3 scenes which are going to crop up in the latter half of the story, and are actually relevant to the narrative. The whole story is largely a psychological battle between altruistic and erotic romance, which is obviously connected with Trixie's need to rebuild a better personality for herself.
I don't know, I may be wrong, but I feel that It'd leave the plot and characterizations lacking in depth and impact if I were to censor the more intimate parts, largely because they're bound to have such a profound effect on Trixie's psyche. Obviously I can't give out details on the whys and wherefores without doling out massive spoilers. However, the bottom line is that this isn't a story about sex. What it is is a story about psychological healing and damage, with a focus on romance/obsession, and obviously sexuality is a very, very important part of that.
As I say, that's my view on the whole thing, but please do let me know if you think the M-rated stuff comes across as gratuitous or off-putting. As always, huge thanks for the feedback, and it's good to know you're liking the story!
... DANG... You know how to drag it out! XD Must... be... patient... ; ;
Ohmygosh, and I thought the third chapter ended in cliffhanger style. This one is much more emotional and breathtaking. Wonderful chapter - can't wait to see more!
And I think I get it now: the reason for such pacing, somepony could name slow. it's the growing anticipation that makes a yet-to-come-romance so long awaited. Step by step, thought by thought we wander into the inner world of our characters - Trixie and Flutters both - and can't help sharing their thoughts and desires, phantasies, fears and expectations. Maybe again it's me being so sensitive and susceptible, but I take this story and characters very close to my heart.
And speaking about M-rating - at this point everything that's gonna happen between Shy and Trixie won't be a simple sexual intercourse, and not just an act of love and devotion - but kind of a turning point, breaking their past lives to pieces, creating new personalities, open for new a brand new world. Catharsis - yes, I can't think of better definition. It gonna take a real mastery to depict even the sauciest of scenes with care and caution, to show not only the physical side of making love, but a deep spiritual meaning of it. And I'm more than sure you can make it!
And thus I think deleting any romantic and saucy M-scenes gonna left something unsaid, as if a word or two had been thrown away from your favourite song. Or a cherry taken from a top of a pie - though this cherry isn't the very reason we enjoy this delicious pie, right ?;)
Woah, that ending isn't going to get over well with AJ/the rest of the Apple family/anyone else.
I find the backstory of AJ & Dash being ex-marefriends to be interesting, I'm not sure I've seen a post breakup mane 6 relationship in a fic before. One where they breakup in the middle of the story, usually as the main ship the fic is about, sure, seen that plenty. But this seems new to me.
I love this very figuratively way of describing you have. At a few points I, as someone who doesn't speak English as a first language, had to stop and think a little bit more about the meanings, but it was beautiful nonetheless, even though it disrupted the flow for me. I still haven't figured out completely what you meant with, " She had been thrown a line, or perhaps an olive branch," An exact explanation would be very nice. The throwing a line part means helping someone who is in trouble. This I figured right away, but the olive branch is as far as I know a sign of victory or peace, and I couldn't really tell so far that Fluttershy and Trixie were fighting ^^.
Keep writing please, I love this story.
1515121 The olive branch in this case is, indeed, being used as a reference to peace. Not really in the sense of 'making peace' after a conflict, but more in the sense that Fluttershy's offering Trixie peace after a difficult life. Sorry, that's probably a really bad way of putting it. Idioms are weird things!
1515673
I think it's an elegant description. I guess the meaning was just a little harder to grasp for me.
Ughhh, waiting for the next chapter of a story is such hard work *gets towel* *wipes forehead*
Oh Shit I think my heart's stopping from all this action....
A commercial one. Or it's just big enough you haven't stumbled onto their personal garden plot, not that there's much growing underneath two feet of snow.
There's something delicious about the self-deprecation here.