...And so it turns out the mature tag was there for a reason all along! Why-oh-why do I always feel the need to make Fluttershy's relationships incredibly convoluted and awkward for all involved?
Anyway, have a chapter! Enjoy, and here's to an awesome 2013.
Only drawback I can see in this chapter is that you used "primrose" five times. Really, you can just call her "yellow" - we know who you mean. "Rose-maned" or "timid" or other descriptors also work. "Primrose" is a lovely word and fits Shy very well, but it's such an unusual word that multiple uses tend to stand out - it reminds me of stories where Rainbow Dash is constantly described as "cerulean".
Otherwise, beautifully done as usual and kudos for continuing to avoid moving things along too quickly.
1931333 You make Fluttershy's relationships convoluted and awkward because that's exactly how she is. She is extraordinarily conflicted by everything that happens, taking into account every nuance that her actions might have on others, and creating repercussions in her mind that exist only in her mind. I personally love the internal dialogue you put into your stories; it's not overbearing, but it really does give an in-depth perspective of the conflict of what we want versus what we do. It creates a very personal and endearing touch, and I only wish I could master the inner workings of the mind like you do. Keep up the great work Ardens, it's always a pleasure to read new chapters from you.
Somehow, when I saw the title, "Cost of Silence", the immediate answer that popped into my mind was 'threesome'. Seriously, I was utterly, completely mislead! Good job!
Well I can take a guess at would is going to happen: Trixie and Fluttershy's feelings are going to come out inappropriately at the party tomorrow. I am 80% sure of my prediction.
And now that you foolishly revealed it, the 30 pages of written script will be burned and thrown out, and rewritten into something else, just for the sake of proving you wrong.
1941593 Haha. Well I have that effect on people, anyway often it is not what will happen but how it happens that is what makes a story. How else would stories that start at the end and go back to beginning work? Also it was no mystery, still love that reaction to the obvious and the reactions when I say stuff, amuses me.
Comment posted by I had no idea deleted Jan 14th, 2013
Comment posted by AetherToast deleted Jan 14th, 2013
Comment posted by I had no idea deleted Jan 14th, 2013
1932437 Amen. Ardens-sama Is one of the Few people i've seen that can give a darker or different side to Fluttershy pushing her subconsiously, and yet still retain all the emotions and worries we have come to love And expect from the yellow mare
...And so it turns out the mature tag was there for a reason all along! Why-oh-why do I always feel the need to make Fluttershy's relationships incredibly convoluted and awkward for all involved?
Anyway, have a chapter! Enjoy, and here's to an awesome 2013.
Yay
Only drawback I can see in this chapter is that you used "primrose" five times. Really, you can just call her "yellow" - we know who you mean. "Rose-maned" or "timid" or other descriptors also work. "Primrose" is a lovely word and fits Shy very well, but it's such an unusual word that multiple uses tend to stand out - it reminds me of stories where Rainbow Dash is constantly described as "cerulean".
Otherwise, beautifully done as usual and kudos for continuing to avoid moving things along too quickly.
Can't wait to see how the party shakes out. That should be a good chapter.
Once again, it's a pleasure to edit your wonderful pony-words.
D'AWWwwww cuddlebug ending.
That was awesome.
You know what they say, Trixie, it's always the quiet ones.
1931333 You make Fluttershy's relationships convoluted and awkward because that's exactly how she is. She is extraordinarily conflicted by everything that happens, taking into account every nuance that her actions might have on others, and creating repercussions in her mind that exist only in her mind. I personally love the internal dialogue you put into your stories; it's not overbearing, but it really does give an in-depth perspective of the conflict of what we want versus what we do. It creates a very personal and endearing touch, and I only wish I could master the inner workings of the mind like you do. Keep up the great work Ardens, it's always a pleasure to read new chapters from you.
-Rem
WOW!!! Please... we want MOAR!!!
And how much longer will you keep torturing those two mares???
Somehow, when I saw the title, "Cost of Silence", the immediate answer that popped into my mind was 'threesome'.
Seriously, I was utterly, completely mislead! Good job!
Well I can take a guess at would is going to happen: Trixie and Fluttershy's feelings are going to come out inappropriately at the party tomorrow. I am 80% sure of my prediction.
1938269
And now that you foolishly revealed it, the 30 pages of written script will be burned and thrown out, and rewritten into something else, just for the sake of proving you wrong.
1941593
Haha. Well I have that effect on people, anyway often it is not what will happen but how it happens that is what makes a story. How else would stories that start at the end and go back to beginning work? Also it was no mystery, still love that reaction to the obvious and the reactions when I say stuff, amuses me.
just say already flutters
1952270
Lol I don't know what the hell you are meaning here.
1955806
Doesn't matter, decided to delete comments irrelevant to this story.
1932437
Amen. Ardens-sama Is one of the Few people i've seen that can give a darker or different side to Fluttershy pushing her subconsiously, and yet still retain all the emotions and worries we have come to love And expect from the yellow mare
JUST KISS ALREADY DAMN IT
Awkward wingboner: primed and ready.
Woah.... I mean just..... Woah