• Published 24th Sep 2012
  • 4,727 Views, 264 Comments

Hearts, Hooves, and a Colt Who Loves Pie - GuyInTheCorner



Hearts and Hooves Day is Soarin's greatest enemy, but this one will be perfect! Hopefully...

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12
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Getting Thrown Off

Soarin looked out the window of the Wonderbolts base in Cloudsdale. He didn't want to, but he did. It was too late for him to be up, but he was. Outside his home, well, the Wonderbolt's shared home, a storm was brewing. The weather teams had been ordered a massive storm for tonight to cool down the region after an odd heat wave, allegedly caused by an unexpected mood swing from Celestia. Soarin didn't care. He didn't care if this storm lasted forever. He needed the next week or so to himself. It was that time of year again. Soarin's mortal enemy would make its annual awakening, wreaking havoc on him and only him. If he wasn't careful, horrible things would happen. He might get severely injured, or destroy a building, or worse.

That's right. Hearts and Hooves Day was approaching. The absolute worst time of year.

While true it wasn't quite here yet, Soarin' wasn't taking any chances. Alas, the Universe had other plans. Sitting on a coffee table beside him sat three pink envelopes for Spitfire, Fleetfoot, and himself, the three Wonderbolts who shared the apartment. Inside each of them was a letter from Princess Cadence herself.

Leaning forward, Soarin removed the letter from an already opened envelope. Delicately removing the letter from its encasing, he read it over again, and sighed. It was an invitation to Cadence's Hearts and Hooves Gala, held this upcoming Hearts and Hooves Day. It asked for the presence of the Wonderbolts and a required date with each of them.

Why did the world hate him?

Now, it wasn't the day itself that Soarin hated, it was what has happened to him during it. Dates, horrible dates. He'd tried and tried again, with the single goal of a decent date, but it never seemed to work in his favor. There was last year's date with Spitfire. It had been... awkward, to say the least. He had asked Spitfire to dinner, just as friends, in an attempt to play things safe. When Spitfire let him order their food, he decided on a pasta dish. It turned out that Spitfire was allergic to one of the spices that was used in it. And her allergic reaction didn't just cause her to burst out in measles: It caused her to barf. Everywhere. The two's uniforms were at the cleaner's for weeks. It was a miserable failure. But that wasn't the only reason that date failed. Two Wonderbolts on a date attracted a lot attention, and they could never find peace or quiet. The paparazzi had pictures of the date, most every second. And yes, that included the barfing.

And there was the year before that! Ugh. That time, he had tried a Speed Dating program. Worst. Idea. Ever. When ponies learned that a Wonderbolt was partaking in a speed-dating program, how many of them do you think would show up for a chance to go on a date with him? Millions. Ok, that's an exaggeration, but most every available mare in Cloudsdale had tried. And failed, for that matter. Nopony that signed up caught Soarin's interest. They all just showed up, hyperventilated, and proceeded to faint. When one pony didn't, it turned she had been a pie chef, for the love of Celestia! Soarin couldn't ask for more! However, She had a problem too; She was extremely passive-aggressive and had severe anger issues. She ended up destroying a large portion of her own bakery when Soarin asked if she wanted to do something other than eat pie.

Oh, and before that there was the date with Fleetfoot. Ack. Pure disaster. There's just so much to cover on that one. Long story short, the Wonderbolts are banned from Appleloosa, which sucks, because Soarin had some friends down there.

He could go on and on past that. He could go on and painfully recall ever horrible date he'd had. He decided to stop, and just sighed. Looking out his window again, he flopped onto the couch, which matched his coat color, and just closed his eyes. He just wanted to doze off. Let sleep take him over, dive into a world of dreams. His eyelids felt heavy. He blinked slowly a few times. He yawned loudly and closed his eyes...

CRACK!

"AGH!" He screamed in fear and fell off the sofa, breathing heavily. He sprang back up, looking around worriedly "Just the storm..." He said to himself. The surprise that had washed over him slowly retreated. Another flash of lightning outside, this time silent, lit up the dark room. In the brief moment of light, he shot his bright green eyes over at his desk, one room away from him. He turned on some lights and walked over to it through an open door. He pulled up a chair and slumped down on it, mirroring an odd sitting position a past date had taught him. He looked over some of the materials laid out on his desk. A few photos were speckled across the flat surface, ranging from snapshots of different aerial shows to events he had attended.

The ones that caught his eye first were pictures from the Royal Wedding and the Grand Galloping Gala. He picked up one and smiled. This photo depicted him with a cyan pegasus mare with a rainbow-hued mane. "Rainbow Dash..." he whispered to himself, happily. It was from the wedding. He had worn a military jacket, and Rainbow wore the same aerodynamic dress she had worn to the Gala. She had preformed a Sonic Rainboom at the wedding. It was magnificent. She had preformed the Sonic Rainboom one time that Soarin had seen. She had saved his life doing it. Not only his, but Spitfire's, Fleetfoot's, and her own friend Rarity's. For this, Soarin was forever in her debt. Not only for that, but she had also saved his pie once. Again, forever in her debt.

Soarin smiled again at the picture, and tucked it away in a drawer. He picked up his goggles, which were sprawled out on the desk as well, and strapped them on. He adjusted them in front of his mirror, and fixed his mane afterword using a comb he had kept in the bottom left drawer. He liked his goggles. They were part of him.

He heard the door to the house creak open, and two sets of hoofsteps walking in.

"Hey, big blue," he heard a familiar voice say. "How ya doing?"

Soarin got up and turned around, seeing Spitfire and Fleetfoot trotting in. Fleetfoot closed the door behind the two. The two were soaked from head to hoof. Most colts would probably been slightly turned on by seeing them walk in like that. However, Soarin had known these two for years. He could really care less.

"Doing swell, Spitfire," he said. Soarin walked out of the room, and came back with two towels. He threw them to the mares, who proceeded to dry themselves off.

"Helluva storm," Fleetfoot said, shaking herself dry for good measure.

Soarin nodded. "It’s just the world trying to make me feel miserable this time of year. As usual." He sighed.

The two mares shared a chuckle at their teammate. "Soarin, the Universe isn't out to get you," Spitfire laughed. "What did you ever do to it?"

He shrugged his wings and frowned. "Karma's weird like that."

Fleetfoot trotted over to her friend and tapped him a bit on the shoulder. "So how ya gonna fail this year's Hearts and Hooves Day, Soarin?" She joked. "Gonna try some crazed fanmare?"

"No, I'm not," he said, solemnly. He looked at his friends with a serious look on his face. "Because this year, I'm not going to try anything. I'm going to stay here in bed, the whole day, in order to avoid disaster." He had a hint of remorse in a voice.

His two friends stared at him in shock. "But... You've never given up before," Spitfire said, sympathetically. "No matter how many times you've failed, you've never given up on anything!" She stomped a hoof. "You have to try!"

"Who says?" Soarin shouted, stomping a hoof on the floor like Spitfire had. "Every time I try to get a date, I fail! Horribly, at that!" He growled. "So its simple: Never try, never fail." He sat down on the floor and frowned. "It's the only way."

The two mares shook their heads. "I'm not going to let you sit here and mope until Hearts and Hooves Day passes, Soarin. I know Hearts and Hooves day is around a week away, so that gives you enough time to get to work." Spitfire paced around the room, glancing over at Soarin. "And I have the perfect idea for you!" She broke into a wide grin.

Soarin gulped. Fleetfoot also looked at Spitfire, seeming a bit worried as well. The two shook their heads at the flame-headed pegasus. "Spitfire... One of the very few things that can end worse than one of my dates is one of your 'Good Ideas.' So I'm sorry, but I don't want to hear it," Soarin said with a worried tone.

Spitfire sighed. "But this idea is actually really good!" Spitfire walked over to Soarin's desk, the same one he had been sitting at earlier. "Because you're going to ask out," she opened one of the drawers and pulled out a photograph, "her."

The two other Wonderbolts stared at the picture.

"Her?" Fleetfoot said. Then she burst into laughter. "That's ridiculous!" She laughed so hard her eyes teared up. She wiped a tear away with one of her hooves. "That's... Oh Celestia! That's crazy!" She fell onto her back. "She's the craziest fanmare ever!"

Soarin gulped. "Why... Why Rainbow Dash?" He stared at Spitfire. She knows? he thought to himself.

"Because," Spitfire started, staring intensely at Soarin, "She's perfect for you. She loves the Wonderbolts, you're a Wonderbolt. She saved even you life once. And look at all these pictures of you with her!" She dug deeper into the drawer, and pulled out more pictures of the two together. Pictures from the Gala, the Wedding, from the Best Young Flyers Competition. She looked across the pile of snapshots herself, quite surprised at just how much there really was. They had spent some time together at the Gala, and at there was even a picture of the two dancing at the Wedding. And sharing a pie together. They looked so perfect together.

"I don't wanna," Soarin said, pouting. "It'll just end horribly." She's onto me, he though.

"To bad," Spitfire said. "You're doing it. I won't let you sit here and mope! You need to try, Soarin! I know you've had feelings for her for some time! I'm sure Fleetfoot knows, too!" Fleetfoot nodded, now standing back up on all fours.

Soarin blushed. "So what? That never changed anything before." Oh god, she said it. She knows!

"What’s that supposed to mean?" Spitfire said, raising an eyebrow. "Did you have sincere romantic feelings for any of your failed dates?"

Soarin opened his mouth to talk, but closed it again. He just shook his head. "No..." he muttered.

"Exactly," Spitfire added, smiling. "Real feelings might be all you need for a good date. And we both know you like her!" Spitfire beamed at him. "And check these!" She grabbed up the letter Soarin had left on the coffee table. "Invitations to a Hearts and Hooves Gala! With...a required date...?" She raised an eyebrow. "Well, it shouldn't be to hard for me. I'm just so damn sexy!" Spitfire grinned and raised her eyebrows, which triggered confused looks from her friends. "Anyway, you can ask Rainbow!"

Still stunned by Spitfire's odd remark, Soarin sighed. "How long have you known I liked her?"

Spitfire laughed. "Since forever?" She looked at Soarin, who wore a frown.

"Oh," he sniffled. "Still! If I try, I'll ruin something!"

"Then we'll just have to make you," Fleetfoot said, speaking up.

Spitfire nodded. "Get out. Go to Ponyville. Talk to Rainbow. Win her heart, somehow."

Soarin gulped again. "But... What about the storm? It’s too dangerous." He hoped he was somewhat convincing. He was one of the most talented flyers in the world. He’d probably avoid most of the danger.

"Then wear your Wonderbolt costume. We had them lightning-proofed by some unicorns, remember?" Fleetfoot said, tapping her hoof on the ground.

"In the cleaners," Soarin informed her. He smiled. "I'll just have to wait."

"To bad," Fleetfoot snapped at him. She and Spitfire walked over to Soarin, cornering him.

"Guys..." Soarin said. "What are you doing?" His voice rose slightly. "Guys! Stop!" His teammates, with combined efforts, picked up Soarin and walked over to the door. Using a free hoof, Fleetfoot opened it up. The two mares walked out onto their porch. The outside of their cloud home stood over one of the edges of the flying city, looking down onto the fields below. The storm was really kicking into overdrive, blasting lightning frequently.

"Be free, Big Blue!" Spitfire cried before the two mares threw him off the edge.

"ARGH!" Soarin began plummeting, falling fast towards the ground. He beat his wings furiously, sustaining himself midair. "Woo... Close one," he mumbled. He looked back up at his house. "How could they do this to me?" He sighed and set his sights on Ponyville. He didn't know where Rainbow lived, but he knew she stayed close to the small town most of the time. "Well, I may as well try," he mumbled and flew downwards.

Suddenly, there was an unbelievably loud crack of thunder, and Soarin's world lit up around him with a flash of lightning. His vision flared white, and a smell of smoke wound around him.

He fell downwards towards Ponyville, smoke streaming behind him.