Ponyville's Crossroad Crisis.

by skytail

Epilogues

Mobius
Tails entry #234

The Equestrian File: the most recent Adventure I went on with Sonic involved the Chaos Emeralds taking us to a whole new world. Sonic once again was able to save everyone. But this got me thinking “how much does this world differ from the one we landed on.

Although the link that the Emeralds made is gone, that didn’t stop me from researching the most I could about that world. I was able to get my hands on one of the Chaos Emeralds to start my research.

The things I have found maybe small, but they do give me great hope:
1. The Emeralds do have the power to recreate the link, but unfortunately it’s a link that the Emeralds would have to make themselves.
2. The time difference between this world and Equestria, the world we were on, is actually only a difference of about 2 ½ minutes. This is great knew because if I were to find a way back to Equestria, the time Difference would go unnoticed.
3. If you look at my other notes, then you know that this last fact is same as all the others: although the Data Says that going back is Impossible, I have seen Sonic challenge and even do the Impossible.

These conclude the current notes I have on this subject; I will continue my research and expand on this entry if, and when I find something new. This is Miles “Tails” Prower, sighning off for now.

The Doctor’s Journal:

Dear Journal, Today I have received a strange signal that the TARDIS fallowed. It landed me and my associates in a place called Equestria, a planet full of talking animals and a physics that could only be described as magic.

The strangest part of it all was the transformation that we underwent. Because of the laws of this world, we morphed into Ponies…I’m not joking, Ponies, for real. It was strange predicament we were in, but lucky for us we met a nice yellow Pegasus, yes a Pegasus, and she led me to a very powerful purple Unicorn. By now you probably think I have gone off the deep end but this is all true.

The source of the power that attracted the TARDIS was a rather strange gem; they called it a “Chaos Emerald”. It was not quite what I was expecting, but it was the source of the power. The owner of the Emerald was a blue Bipedal hedgehog and fox, and they were quite kind in letting me barrow the Emerald to repower and repair the TARDIS, as long as I help them back to their world.

The charging would take at least 14 hours, so to occupy the time I bought a new fez while Amy and Rory attended a race the hedgehog and another Pegasus were having. It was cut short, however by an attack by a most remarkable Robot, but thanks to the brave efforts of the hedgehog, Pegasus, and Unicorn, and my brilliants of course, we stopped that vile robot.

Sadly that was my cue to leave. Right as I was ready to leave, with the additional two passengers, they were called back. Something about an attack, but they insisted I leave, so now here I am. We are now back in our original human and Time lord forms. The rift that led me to that world has closed, and I can never go back. I can only hope they are alright. Hope, something they subtlety taught me while I was there. Perhaps not so Humany Wumany after all.

JIMMY’S JOURNALE:

EQUESTRIA: Sora’s self-discovery adventure has led him to Equestria, a land of horses. I won’t go into detail what happened right now but, he did help save that world from an Evil Draconequus named Discord. We are now off to find a new adventure, instead of waiting for one to find us. Something about something Sonic said. “Thanks for all the adventures and to all the adventures yet to come.” Sonic said.

I believe Sora has learned a lesson in all this: An adventure is one you take with your friends.

I do believe Sora will now enjoy what he can with the friends he makes.

TWILIGHT’S LETTER:

Dear princesses Celestia,

Due to the recent “Events” Equestria has gone through, I think you already know what has happened. But I would like to share what I have learned from this experience.

I have learned that:
1. An Impossible can be challenged; all you need is a strong heart and good friends.
2. Faith is something that can be easily lost, a good friend, however, can help you uplift this faith.
3. An adventure is anything you do with your friends and comes from anywere, even a blue box.
4. Finally, just because a friend is gone does not mean they are forgotten. The ties and links you have with a friend is what can connect your hearts to theirs.

Your faithful student,

Twilight Sparkle.

THE END.

Comments

[Spacecore2]

Sonic, DW, AND Ponies?! I gotta read this.

[Syrahl696]

Looking at the word count I can tell that you must have put an obscene amount of effort into this story. However, looking at the description, this story is likely to be riddled with errors. It is 1:00 in the morning and I can't read this now, but you are going to need to get an editor if you want this story to reach it's potential.

[Chaotic Note]

1211469 Well you're correct about that, everything is cramped together, not spaced out.

[skytail]

1211499 i know, im not quite sure how FimFiction works Exactly. i just "copy paste" from word. that's all.
1211469 there are most likely going to be a TON of mistakes. mostly at the end because i didn't have an actual editor, just my mom. but o hope you enjoy what you can make of it.

[PeaceLovingHippie22]

I have to say that I found it amusing. (BTW You probably know who I am from my username.)

[skytail]

1211469 i think I've fixed a good amount of them.

[Syrahl696]

1329963

while reading

The FIRST WORD in the DESCRIPTION and there is a capitalisation error.

Darkness

Doesn't need a capital.

that threatened Equestria once, will return.

You need a has here, after that.

almost

Another capitalisation error.

several strangers find them selves on the out skirts of ponyville

Themselves is one word, as is outskirts.

, but why

Use a full stop and a capital letter here, other wise it doesn't flow right (too many commas)

emeralds

Should be capitalised.

, and have scattered.

Doesnt flow right, again. Try using something like 'And on top of that, the Chaos Emeralds had been scattered.

now

Capitalisation error.

and
get back home

Extra line break here.

, named Twilight

You dont need a comma here, and try using Twilight Sparkle's full name, as you are working from the perspective of Sonic and Tails for this part.

another pony wielding a giant key

Maybe say another newcomer wielding a giant key?

goofy

Needs a capital letter.

turned into animals

They've been turned into animals before, so say specifically that they've been turned into ponies.

heartless

Needs a capital.

may

Try using might here, to mix things up.

later

Another capitalisation error.

oh

Unnecessary.

every one

One word. But this whole sentence would benefit from being reworked, like say ', and they had somehow been turned into ponies.

this

Needs capital.

big, wibbly wobbly ,timey wimey, situation

You need no commas here, just add the word that at the end.

them selves

This is one word.

You probably also need an extra paragraph at the end to wrap up all the different crossover introductions and hint at what exactly is going down in Equestria.

I somehow doubt you fixed a 'good' amount of the errors.
Especially considering I found all of these errors in the description. (they are in order of appearance, so you can fix them easily)

I still haven't read the actual story. But you still get a large amount of credit for trying. Specifically, for trying to do a triple crossover. I would never have the guts to try to do such a thing.

Later, I could wrap up this entire thing by rewriting your entire description for you, but I need to go to sleep.
Oh, and sorry about the obscenely long comment.

[skytail]

1330530 ... wow. thanks. 1st. the description for the story actually does not reflect the over all quality of the story. when i can i will have to run this by my editor and see if he can fix it real quick. 2nd. if you do get around to reading it, please point out any mistakes that you notice. 3rd. when i say i fixed a good amount of mistakes i should have clarified that i meant the 3rd chapter. and finally, its actually a quadruple crossover. thanks again for pointing out the mistakes in the description, it was something that i wrote in a hurry and did not have time to go back over properly and plus im not the best when it comes to grammer

[Syrahl696]

1331377
The description is probably what is turning off most of your potential readers.Even if it isn't indicative of the quality of the actual story, people are going to assume that it is. It's probably the reason you only have 171 readers.

[Syrahl696]

Well, finally got around to reading this. There are still several major errors that I cant be bothered to point out right now, for example you used English instead of Equestrian in the first chapter, you botched Pinkies introduction in the second chapter, and you seem to be a bit biased towards Sonic, specifically giving him the Ultima Weapon (You also misspelled Ultima as Ultimate) in the third chapter seemed rather forced (When crossing over from multiple sources, try to give each source a similar amount of attention) , and Twilight's letter in the epilogue could use a great deal of finetuning.

It wasn't as plagued with errors as the original description led me to believe, but there's still a lot of work to do before it really lives up to it's potential. I've said it before and I will say it again: kudos for doing a triple crossover. That takes guts. (It's a triple crossover because MLP doesnt count. Pony elements are a given for any story on this site, and it's taken for granted.)

Anyway, that's by no means all of the mistakes I noticed, even if what you've done so far had perfect spelling, grammar and punctuation, it still wouldn't make a great story. If I were to sit here foverhauling your story for a week, by the end of it there might be something feature-box worthy. But I dont have the time, and this is your story. Your execution is what is dragging this story down, and that is what you need to improve.

Anyway, I really botched that advice up. I'm usually a bit better than that. But keep trying and you'll get there eventually.

[skytail]

1437879 if you know any one who would like to edit this for me that would be greatly appreciated.

[skytail]

1513588 true but if you remember in kingdom hearts II in the pride lands if you talk to Donald it the beaning g of the world then he say "If Kairi saw you like this, I bet she'd think you were cute! I guess those magical clothes of yours transformed you."
here is a video. go to 4:23 to see it.

[Mat the Brawler]

1513723 Well I guess that's the game breaking continuity.

[fluttercord45]

This story is AWESOME I it

[skytail]

3098390 well at least one person likes it. thanks.

[fluttercord45]

3116269 no problem

[DJPurple3]

This is really good. I'm glad I read this! Nice job!

*Applauds vigourously*