The Disastrous Adventures of Crew-T

by TheMajorTechie

Crash Course through the Tonkus-verse: The Beginning

Author's Note:

I have lost all control of my life and I will now write a chapter for every fic that I currently have published.

The fic being visited: Wielder of the Orb (the original script-formatted pile of nonsense, not the ponyfic I have published here on horsewords site)

Story requests are closed for the time being. I've got a lot on my hands with this arc.

Next chapter: meeting the OG Sammy from before Wielder of the Orb, Wielder of the Orb: Of Magic and Ponies, and Of All Things.

"What's that you got there, Sweetie?" Zoey wandered into the backrooms with a juicebox. "Looks funky."

"TIME MACHINE." Sweetie Giraffe boomed. "CAN MAKE TIME GO BACKWARD. SEE HISTORY."

"Really?"

"YES. WANT EXPLORE." She ducked down, peering into the inside of the time machine. "TIME MACHINE TOO SMOL. BUT NO DESTROY. I STAY. YOU GO."

"O...kay?" Zoey finished her juicebox. "I guess I'll have Plissa join me, then."

"WHY YOU NOT ACT WEIRD NOW? YOU NOT ACT LIKE CHANGE DIFFERENT ZOEY ALL THE TIME."

Zoey shrugged and wandered back out of the room.

---

"A time machine?" Plissa raised a brow, being dragged along by Zoey into the backroom. "Since when did we have a time machine?"

"'Dunno. You wanna try it out with me?"

Plissa glanced out the window. The ship was parked at a space McDonald's, so there wasn't any need to pilot it at the moment. She could just make out the shape of Butter Knife obliterating a 20-piece chicken nugget meal. She turned back. "Yeah, sure. Not like there's anything else to do."

"Alright! Let's go then!" Zoey opened the door to the time machine, hopping inside. "Ooh, when should we go first?"

Plissa rubbed her chin. "Hm. Maybe six or so years ago? We've visited plenty of worlds at this point, but I'd like to see what things were like from back then."

"Sure."

And so they proceeded to travel somewhere between six and seven years ago but I didn't make it specific 'cause I didn't bother to go back and look at the date on the garbage-fire script I wrote ages ago for my first full-on story.

---

"Hey, Plis, can I call you Lizzy?"

"Sure. There's no other Lisa to confuse me with right now."

"Also, why are we in a tree?"

"No clue."

Lisa opened the door, peeking outside. Sure enough, just like the view from the window, they were in a tree. "Alright, let's take a look around this place, shall we?" She stepped out, carefully placing her feet among the branches. "Watch your ste--"

She proceeded to watch Zoey slip right between the branches and out of the tree.

"Ow."

Lisa climbed down from the tree, jogging to where the girl had landed. "You alright there? That was a pretty big fall."

"...Yeah," Zoey sat up, wincing a little. "I think I'm okay. Little bit bruised, that's all."

"Come on! I heard something go thump over here!" An oddly familiar voice yelled.

Lisa rolled her eyes. "Here it goes again."

"Name yourselves!" A... she turned her gaze downward ...middle schooler shouted, pointing a finger at them. "Are you with MindGlitch?"

"MindGli--" Lisa couldn't finish before giggling. "MindGlitch? What sort of name is that?"

"C'mon, Zoey, get up!" The boy continued shouting. "Get away from that stranger!"

"Who, me?" Zoey pointed at herself. "How'd you know my name?"

"Whuh?" The boy turned his head as the rest of his friends caught up. "Wait--there's two Zoeys now?"

"Potatoes!" The other Zoey squeaked.

"I vaguely remember something about doing that." Zoey shrugged. "The whole potato thing, I mean. But... I don't exactly think that I'm the same as her beyond looks."

"Ooh, is your name Zoey too?" The... other Zoey grinned. "Are you, like, my long-lost twin or something?"

"Noooooo... I think?"

"Is everyone here just going to ignore the random adult here?" One of the boy's friends groaned. "She's just standing there... menacingly."

"Hey!" Lisa yelled. "I don't look that mean when I'm annoyed! And I'm not with whoever this 'MindGlitch' dude is, either."

"Fine, lady." The boy crossed his arms. "What are you doing here, then? And why is there another Zoey?"

"Time machine." Lisa and Zoey both answered. They looked at each other because answering at the same time was a corny thing that only happened in corny stories, meaning that this story you're reading is now corny.

"Oh. So you're from the future, then?" The boy looked at Zoey again. Then to Lisa. Then back to Zoey. "Is that your aunt or something? I don't recognize her."

"Wh--no!" Lisa snorted. "We're not even related!"

"So you are a stranger then!" The other Zoey gasped. "Stranger danger! Get away from her, me!"

Lisa facepalmed. "Okay, you know what? Let's start things over. My name's Lisa, this is Zoey. We're friends 'cause Zoey works the front desk at my work when she's bored, though she's apparently got several other Zoeys floating around in that head of hers."

"You're my little sister?" The other Zoey raised a brow. "I guess you do look kinda like her... but when did you get bigger than me?"

Another facepalm. "Did you not hear me? We're just friends. I have no blood relation to Zoey, or any of you as far as I know! I--" Her eyes locked onto what was more or less a toddler version of herself wandering out behind the other Zoey. "--oh geez. Zoey, I think I finally get why there's two of me and several of you."

"Hm?"

Lisa shuddered. "We're... recycled characters."

The boy backed up. "O...kay. You're just crazy, aren't you? Only we can time-travel! We have the Or--" His eyes followed past Lisa's deadpan glare to her thumb, and finally to the still-smoldering time machine sitting atop a nearby tree. "oh."

"Anyway," Lisa folded her arms. "We've already introduced ourselves. Mind introducing yourselves, now? It'd only be fair."

"Fine." The boy grumbled. "My name is Sammy Gearings. These are my friends. You already know who Zoey is now, and... uh, our Lisa as well. Brodie's the one on my left and Caleb's to my right."

"Aight."

"Aight?"

"Aight." Zoey repeated. "It's like 'alright', but without the 'l' and the 'r'. Aight."

"Oh. Okay."

"So, uh, anyway--" Lisa scratched her head. "Mind telling us a bit about the stuff that's currently happening around here? There was a time machine on our spaceship and Zoey wanted to explore a little, so I went with her."

Sammy nearly choked. "You guys have a spaceship?!"

"Apparently. No idea why or how, though. The rest of the crew and I just sorta... showed up. There was this disembodied voice welcoming us too, if I remember correctly."

"Man. I wish I had a spaceship."

"Also, does Caleb happen to have any younger sisters?"

Caleb shook his head. "No, why?"

"Just asking, since you guys somehow jumped to the conclusion that I was your Zoey's little sister but all-grown-up. A spent a good chunk of my life living in a simulation I made where I was the little sister to my actual younger brother, Timothy, who went by the name Caleb in the simulations."

Sammy furrowed his brows. "...What?"

"Parents died, used virtual reality to run away from my problems, ended up becoming my younger brother's little sister. Don't think about it too hard, 'cause I also have memories of being a pony named Twilight Sparkle in that same simulation, with my brother being a little dragon named Spike."

"Pony?" The other Zoey gasped. "You were a pony?"

"In a simulation, yeah--" Lisa nodded. "Obviously not in real-life, though. So anyway, what're you kids up to?"

Sammy hesitated. "I don't think I should be telling you. My own uncle was being controlled by MindGlitch before."

"Oh."

"Though... you don't seem to be possessed, so I think it should be safe to tell you. Having an adult around might help in the fight." Sammy balled his fists. "Who knows what that villain, MindGlitch, could be up to now?"

"Okay, okay, first of all--" Lisa interrupted. "I still have no idea who this 'MindGlitch' dude is. Second of all, you guys are kids. What the heck are you even doing?"

Sammy sighed. "Come. I will show you all you need to know." He turned around and began to walk away.

Zoey elbowed Lisa. "Since when did that whole 'older sister becomes younger sister' thing happen? I thought 'the you turning into Twilight Sparkle' was the simulation!"

"No clue."

---

"Did I sound cool back there when I was explaining?" Sammy's voice came from behind the door of the small shed-lab thing. "I even tried lowering my voice a little bit!"

Lisa opened the door.

"Oh, right, right," Sammy immediately took on a more serious demeanor. "Explanations. I am Sammy Gearings, first-known wielder of a powerful..." he hesitated at the mention of the word. "...magical artifact called the Orb." He lifted a hand, allowing for the glassy ball sitting on the table beside him to levitate into the air. "It was originally a book, but after chanting one of the first spells contained within said book, it became... well, this."

"Interesting, I suppose." Lisa's eyes wandered to the small refrigerator nearby, which was visibly overflowing with various potato carvings. This whole conversation was getting more awkward by the second, to be honest.

---

For purposes called "It's 2:13 AM and I am not reading my middle-school fever dream again at this time", all explanation about the Orb and MindGlitch has been skipped.

"Oh... uh, gee, that's... interesting?" Lisa cringed at the fact that Sammy had a rival whose sidekick had taken on the nickname of "Stupid". What was it with kids these days?

A deep, bellowing cackle began to fill the room. "Good evening, my chumps and chump-ettes!" MindGlitch stepped out of the portal. "My, what a crowd we have here. I suppose they will serve as a fine distraction for my purposes..."

MindGlitch raised a hand, pointing a finger at Lisa and Zoey. "My loyal minions, destroy them!"

Lisa and Zoey braced for an invasion of giant yellow tictacs. This wasn't the case, however.

MindGlitch glared at the Orb in Sammy's grasp. "Before that happens however..." He lowered his arm and began to creep towards the boy. "That power belongs to me, Wielder! I will not stop until I am its sole possessor! We shall do battle day and night if need be, and--" An audible thwack came from behind the villain, who proceeded to drop face-first onto the floor.

Lisa tossed the textbook back onto the table. "There we go. Fixed it."

"What."

"Do what you want with this guy." Lisa turned to leave."This is getting too weird. Zoey?"

Zoey nodded.

"What."

"What can I say? He left himself open. Did you really think I was gonna stand here and do nothing for the sake of plot purposes?"

"Huh???" Sammy sputtered. "What are you even talking about? Plot purposes?"

"Yup. Listen--" Lisa gestured to herself. "I'm not the only version of me out there. Heck, for all I know, I might not be the real Lisa Garnet. I was minding my own business one day, and the next thing I knew, I was sucked into some parallel world along with some others to be part of some sort of exploration team."

Sammy's eyes widened. "E-exploration team? Parallel worlds? Are you saying that the multiverse theory is--"

"Perhaps," Lisa shrugged. "But what matters more is that each and every one of these worlds that we've visited thus far is some form or another of My Little Pony fanfiction."

Yet again, the room fell silent, save for a single "What."

Zoey winked, pointing double finger-guns at Sammy and his friends. "Welcome to horseword-land, buckos."

"I..." Sammy sat down, staring up at the ceiling. "Gee. My Little Pony fanfiction? Seriously?"

"Mm-hm. Guessing you weren't in one before, based on your reaction. Sorry to break it to ya, but we probably split your timeline the moment we arrived, 'cause based on how we came in a time machine and not... well, our usual universe-hopping spaceship, you're basically our distant ancestors."

More confusion noises came from Sammy's mouth.

"What she's saying is that we all come from the same author." Lisa deadpanned. "The world as you know it has probably ceased to exist in the timeline I come from, and those of you lucky enough to escape have been recycled to heck and back." Her eyes turned to the other Zoey's little sister. Then back to Sammy. "Anyway, yeah--the two Zoeys here are the most obvious case of character recycling." She gestured to Zoey. "On a personality level, they seem pretty close to one another, and as you pointed out, even by appearance they're similar! It's obvious that my Zoey is more or less a reincarnation of your Zoey... minus the... er, potato obsession that your Zoey has."

"So, we've been..." Sammy's eyes turned to MindGlitch's unconscious form. "...recycled?"

"Some of you, yeah. Myself and Zoey know that there have been previous incarnations of ourselves at the very least. You two--" she gestured at the other Zoey and her little sister. "Are quite possibly the original. I don't know all the details, but it seems like at minimum, our reincarnations have a tendency to find each other in some way or another."

"Oh, so is there another Sammy where you come from, then?"

Lisa shook her head.

"Oh... okay."

"Yeesh." Zoey elbowed Lisa again. "Did you have to be that blunt?"

"No, no, it's fine. I just... was wondering if more of us ever lived on past..." he huffed. "well, our stories, I guess. You said that this world doesn't exist anymore where you come from?"

A nod.

"Do we... at least get an end to our story?"

"No, unfortunately. As is the fate for many stories that exist in written form. The Orb lives on, but you do not."

"Lis? Lizzy?" Zoey tugged at Lisa's sleeve. "Hey, you alright there? Since when did you know so much about the author multiverse? Hello--"

"It's hard." Lisa whispered.

"What's hard?"

"As a creator of worlds, it's hard to put them down. I know that personally, with the simulations. The characters you make become almost a sort of second-family to you. They were my second-family, to me."

"That's not explaining how you know about the Orb, Lis--"

"Deep down, something... someone still doesn't want to let go, regardless of outward words and actions."

"Ooo-kay, I think I'm just gonna take Lis here with me and go now." Zoey grabbed the rambling Lisa's hand and led her out the door. "It was nice meeting you all, though! Maybe we'll meet again?"

"Maybe!" Sammy waved.

Comments

[Starlight Nova]

A play on the concept behind GMBlackjack's League of Sweetie Belles.

Does this mean this story is going to go on forever?

[TheMajorTechie]

10911887
GIven how it's comment-driven, yeah, it's possible. :V

There's no true end to it, so it either goes on for as long as possible, or it gets cut short and canceled someday.