Celestial Serenades
The curtains shuffled lightly as the midnight breeze caressed them gently. The air was cool, but not cold; it possessed a crispness to it that made each inhalation
refreshing, and each exhalation blissful.
The room before you was dark, but not entirely invisible. You could vaguely make out the blackened shapes of various implements of furniture: a couch, a recliner, a coffee table, a wardrobe, a mirror, and, closer by, an end table. Across the room was a door that was slightly ajar, leading to a place you knew was a washroom, but had you not known the layout of the quarter, you would not have been able to identify a single thing about it, so complete was the darkness that encapsulated it.
The bed upon which you laid was soft, inviting, and warming. Its sheets hugged your form and soothed your aches while its blanket held you tightly and eased your tired mind. The pillow you laid your head against felt as a cloud, its perfect balance between softness and firmness leading you to nuzzle your head deeper into its wonderful embrace. It was almost as if you were in a silk cocoon; a wonderful, illustriously comfortable, silk cocoon.
Then there was the Alicorn beside you. Her name was known throughout the land and spoken always with reverence and joy. She was she who raised the sun, she who brought light to the world after its creatures had finished their nightly slumbers. She was she who had given you a life, a home, and a purpose here in Equestria when you could find none. She was Princess Celestia.
She had you in a soft embrace that sent pleasant shivers through your body. Every so often, she would hum happily as you ran a hand through her velvety mane or lightly scratched her ears. Her amazingly soft fur felt blissful against your skin, as did the feathers of the wings with which she also embraced you. You leaned your head forward and gently rubbed the side of your face against her neck, taking in her flowery scent as you did so. This caused Celestia to giggle slightly as she brought her own face to yours. She nuzzled you affectionately, evoking a tighter hug that brought the two of you even closer, your bodies now molding and conforming to the shape of the other.
“This is nice,” you remark, a smile adorning your lips as the words escape them.
Celestia sighed happily. “It truly is, my little human. It truly is.”
You placed a hand on the back of her head and began to stroke it gently. Celestia made something close to a purring noise as you did, arching her back and shoving her head further into your hand. Emboldened, you placed your other hand on her chest and began to pet and play with the tuft of fur that stood upon it, making a slight sigh yourself as the fur left a ghostly feeling upon your fingers.
Suddenly, you began to feel a firm kneading at your shoulder-blades. You turned your head as far as it could go in a vain attempt to discover who or what was behind you, but you could see nothing. Celestia laughed good-naturedly at your attempts to discover exactly who or what was massaging your back. “Oh my little human,” she cooed. “I simply could not let you have all the fun.”
You turned your head back to see her horn glowing a warm pink. “A magic massage?” You inquired, trying your best to stifle a moan in the process.
“Yes,” Celestia answered gleefully. “Am I doing alright?”
You felt an invisible hoof rub against your sore neck, causing you to grunt in satisfaction before you can answer.
“I’ll take that as a yes!” Celestia giggled before planting a short, affectionate kiss on your cheek.
You blushed profusely. “Y-yeah…” you manage to say. “Y-you’re definitely doing alright.”
This was paradise. Or, at least as close to paradise as one could come. You remembered with painful accuracy your past life: the one you led on Earth. You remembered the long and sleepless nights. You remembered the pain, the suffering, the sin. It sent a shiver down your spine every time your mind once again opened the books of your history; yet, there was nothing you could do to prevent it from doing so. It was a monster; a towering, wretched, horrid monster.
And yet, you could bear it. Although there were times where you felt as Atlas did in the stories—shouldering the entire weight of the world—you did not allow it to break you.
A part of that may have been Princess Celestia. When you had first arrived, she had been exceedingly quick to shelter you, feed you, clothe you, and support you; even though she did not even know you. You had done nothing for her, and to you she owed nothing: yet she still gave. Gave with a generosity unrivaled by anyone you had met before. Gave with a frequency that sent stars around your head. Gave with such joy, that even a child opening gifts around the Christmas tree would fail to compare.
But, perhaps that was the point: perhaps it was the entire idea of giving being more joyful than receiving that propelled her to take such actions. But, would not that, in itself, be selfish motivation? Would not the idea of the benevolent Princess who laid next to you giving for only her own pleasure or own benefit contradict the very idea you had grown to associate her with? But if it was not that, then what was it that drove her to treat you, a total stranger, as if you were her greatest friend?
“My little human?” Celestia broke the relative silence that had been brewing between you, concern in her voice. “Is something the matter?”
“No, no,” you hastily respond, unsure, however, if you were being completely truthful. “I was just… lost in thought.”
“About?” Celestia pressed further, eager to know what it was that burdened your mind.
You were, for a moment, paralyzed with indecision. Did you tell this Princess who had so graced you with the life you presently had, a lie? Or did you ask her that fearful question, that one word that has the power to produce both groundbreaking discovery, and also unparalleled heartbreak?
“Anon,” Celestia whispered gently, placing a hoof carefully onto your cheek. “What is bothering you?”
“Why?” You asked it. In your mind, at that moment, you placed everything on the line. You looked inquisitively at the hand that fed you, and inquired of it that one word society had instructed you never to.
“Why what?” Celestia smiled, her eyebrows slanting upwards in curiosity.
“Well… why have you been so nice to me, when you didn’t even know me?”
Celestia blinked. For a moment, you thought you had ruined everything. For a moment, your mind raced through the possible negative and increasingly likely outcomes to your stupid question, your stupid wonder. She opened her mouth to respond, and you braced yourself for the worst.
Except it never came. “Oh, my little human,” she began, nothing but sweet sincerity in her voice. “Why does the mother protect her child as she does?
You thought for a moment. “Because… it is natural for a mother to want to see her child grow and succeed in the world?”
“Why else?” Celestia asked, no trace of annoyance or anger in her voice.
You could not identify what it was she was getting at, so you relented to what wisdom you knew was about to leave her lips. “Why else?”
“Because she loves her child,” she answered, a bright smile on her face. “A mother protects her child, even when they make mistakes, even when they fail, and even when they have committed wrongdoing, because she loves them. Love is a powerful force, Anon. It moves mountains and drains oceans. Speaking from a point of logic, a mother would have no reason to love her child if her child ended up doing wrong or if her child ended up failing again, and again, and again. And yet, she does. Why? Because true love isn’t attached to actions, to objects, or to ideas. It simply is, Anon. When you came into this land, even though I did not know you, even though you had done nothing to warrant it, I loved you. Why? Because it is love that drives us forward, Anon. It is love that gives us purpose. It is love, that gives us redemption, and frees us from our past.”
It was your turn to blink now. How did she know? How could she identify within your gaze or in your words that it was your past life that ailed you? Was it magic? Was it experience?
“So worry not, my little human,” she said comfortingly. “Because even though there may be those in your past who despise you, know that I love you.”
Tears began to form in your eyes. You lurched forward, burying your head once more into her neck and wrapping her tightly in your embrace. Celestia hugged you more closely in response, her wings and hooves gently stroking your head and back. “I… I love you too…” you choke out. You began to feel something in your chest. It was akin to a fluttering sensation, but not one brought about by nervousness or fear. No, this one felt… good. It felt… wonderful, actually.
Was this joy?
“Shhh…” Celestia shushed as you released the guilt, the pain, and the suffering of your past life, as you finally put down the world you had not released you had been holding upon your shoulders. “Sleep now, my little human…
...for tomorrow is a new day.”
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9730265
Bruh. XD
9730313
Pretty sure Pinkie did that once or twice elsefic,
"Say, does this smell like chloroform to you?" *Mmmph!*
9730820
Thanks!
That was a nice little short story.
9731255
Thank you so much!
A very nice story. Speaks to me on a certain level. Thank you for writing it!
Whos the artist of the cover pic?
9732146
Thank you! I’m very glad I was able to write something that significant to you!
9733152
The artist is assasinmonkey
This is really well done. Especially for your first story. Its cute, interesting and heart warming.
This only criticism I have is I wish it was longer but do not take this as a bad thing,
If a story leaves you wanting more then the author has done their job perfectly.
I look forward to your future work. Its a follow from me.
9735190
Thank you lots! My future stories will much likely be longer — this one was written out of a fit of inspiration that, once it was completed, I didn’t really feel like I could add anything more to.
Thank you for your comment, thanks for the follow, and thank you for your time!
You know, there's a debate in there. A loud, lengthy one. But, let's see if I can cut it short:
Every form of selflesness is, ultimately, selfish - in that it fulfills a basic desire to feel "good", to have your brain release endorphins for your benefit. But... it ultimately doesn't matter, because it cancels itself out, in a way - by giving something to someone else's joy, you receive the joy of giving in return, that much is true... but you'd enjoy the thing itself, had you not given it away. Your net result is the same.
However, the "selfless" part is in that someone else also receives joy from the act. That is what sets this apart. There's no point in analysing whether your own satisfaction makes it selfish or not - your brain would've rewarded you either way, for different reasons. The fact that someone else is positively affected by your action makes all the difference to the equation.
In fact, I don't think "selfish" and "selfless" are good words to use entirely. "Selfish" implies thinking of others, but most people considered "selfish" don't think of others at all - their failure is oft not one of malice, but simple ignorance. Similarly, receiving joy by giving it is also not "selfless", because you think of both others and yourself at the same time (and why shouldn't you?).
For a first story, it's pretty nice. I personally would've dug deeper, probably... but that's just me, it has no bearing on you or your character.
Nice, short, and to the point. A bit too fluffy on the descriptions, perhaps - the beginning spun its wheels a bit before the middle caught some traction, and it may've helped to include some subtle clues that this is somepony else's room before jumping in bed with Celestia, so to speak (... unless you did, and they were subtle enough that I missed them!) - but a pleasant read nonetheless.
9801709
First of all, thank you for your comment, and thank you for taking the time to analyze the part you did!
In as far as the subject for debate goes, it was my goal to portray the main character as someone who thinks, even if sometimes too much, because overthinking is something that I have dealt with very much in the past, and still do, to a degree. Whether or not her actions were selfless or selfish was something that I intended to be a point about which the main character would argue with himself, as another idea I wished to portray was the idea of internal struggle versus actual occurrences.
Secondly, thank you for reading, and I’m glad you enjoyed it! It sincerely means a lot to me that you would take time out of your day to read my story, and to that end, I am quite grateful!
Thirdly, my apologies if the beginning felt a little out of place. I did not include many clues as to the fact that the setting was another’s room, and thus, you did not miss anything.
Overall and truly, thank you so very much for your analysis, your kind words, and your suggestions. It truly does mean a lot to me!
I hope you have a wonderful day!
9801807
Well... I like to listen to myself speak, so if it also happens to bring someone... less-than-suffering, that's a win! :D
And believe me, I appreciate it. It was actually fairly easy to slip into character. The emotions weren't too extreme, and nothing really felt out of place. I like characters that think - they're kinda rare, especially if it's something you can show like you did, instead of just telling us that he does.
Well, to be perfectly honest, I approached it the same way I approach the other two dozen or so stories I sometimes go through a day - with mild curiosity, and a big bag of reservations. Shorts are a good way to 'get into' a writer, since they tend to showcase their writing abilities - a sort of demo, if you will - before committing to something longer. I dislike not finishing what I start reading, and sometimes it can be a nightmare...
It feels like your works won't feel that way at all, unless I find something I very much oppose down the line. I have to admit, the idea of committing to reading "A Broken Harmony" is sounding pretty good right now. Though... I think I'll hold off on that, at least until there's some more meat on those three bones... ;] One thing I truly detest is waiting for the next chapter, and I equally hate demanding a rush-job! So my best approach is, sadly... to wait for the whole thing. ;)
Conflicted, there, as well! I'd want you to be done with it quickly, but if it's any good - and I expect it might be - I'd hate for it to end too soon. :D
Please, don't apologize. It's a stylistic choice you've made - or perhaps something you didn't consider enough... either way, it's a result of work, and never apologize for putting in the work. ;)
If you feel bad about how it is - and not because I somehow didn't like it 100%, but because it bothers your artistic senses - then by all means, rewrite part of it. Or don't. I may offer my thoughts, but it's your story, you get the final say.
Late evening, actually - but thanks all the same, and you as well.
how does a conversation logically progress from a worry about freeloading, to a discussion about love, motherly love specifically mind you, only to then end in an affirmation of romance?
Either the Celestia of this world is pony version christian grey or this is an Aquila Rift situation.
9954584
Oh my goodness! You're awesome! Thanks so much!
9954590
He is still not!—-
You’re welcome -/-
I like this story.
Here’s the only thing I’d change though.
Probably not using a “Romance” tag. Especially when the love shown here is the kind that is shown by a mother and a child, or even best friends; rather than romantic lovers.
And I should know; I’m LoveandEdify.
T H O T
Ever so lovely
This...
This book was made a single week after my mother died, I was only 11. Well, anyways good story!