Continuity Disrupted

by Doug Graves

130 The Cacophony

“Um, hi, Spike!” Twilight looks down her barrel, past the other purple unicorn to meet Spike’s searching eyes. “This isn’t what it looks like.”

Applejack seems to have a frog stuck in her throat, and one cough isn’t enough to get rid of it.

Twilight sighs as Spike continues staring at her. “Okay, this is exactly what it looks like.”

Garble grunts at Spike, rolling his eyes. “Dude, watching two ponies make a foal is incredibly disgusting. And we’ve got a concert to get ready for. I’m taking off.” He looks over at Sweetie Belle, a heavy sigh as she lays there shuddering. "Should I just grab her, or..."

Twilight and Starlight lock eyes, then glance down their bellies. “Um,” Twilight starts off, Starlight finishing, “That’s not really how this works.”

“Oh.” Garble shrugs. “Hard to tell with ponies, you know. You’re all so bright and colorful. So...” He grimaces, sticking a finger to his mouth. “...sickeningly cute.”

“Yeah, but…” Twilight says, her tail flicking to the side, taking Starlight’s with it.

Garble continues, not really looking at them, “And dragons, we just kind of take it when we want it, so…”

“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash says with more than a little venom, “we got that too.”

“I was kind of under the impression that-”

“We know, darling,” Rarity says reassuringly. “It is fun to watch, though.”

Garble shakes his head, “Whoa! No! I’m not a dirty equiphile! Now, two big, tough dragons getting a clutch going? That’s more my speed! Hey, maybe you’ll see a bit of that at the concert tonight!”

Sweetie Belle gradually recovers, awakened from the loud noises; her eyes slowly tracing over her red, pink, and purple cutie mark. They swiftly get wider and wider, then flick over to her sister’s and their newly reattached cutie marks. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo mimic her, muzzles slowly curling larger and larger as a shrill cry pierces the clearing.

“WE ALL GOT THE SAME CUTIE MARKS!! CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS FOREVER!!”

“Wait,” Sweetie Belle says, peering closely at Apple Bloom’s flank. “Yours is different than mine.”

“You’re right. Ah’ve got an… apple?”

“And I’ve got a wing, and you’ve got a star?” Scootaloo squats down. “That just seems so…”

“Obvious?” Apple Bloom drawls.

“Yeah.” Scootaloo sighs. “I mean, it’s appropriate, I guess, but I was hoping for a little more individuality in mine.”

“Yeah, me too. At least Ah got an Apple themed cutie mark, so Ah don’t have to be worried about being thrown out of the family or nothing.” Apple Bloom turns to grin at Applejack, only to watch her dam nod in agreement.

“It’s true, we won’t throw nopony out, even good-fer-nothin’ unicorns, ‘long as they got themselves an Apple related cutie mark.” Applejack nods, looking around quizzically as the rest of the herd stares at her. “What?”

"So, we got cutie marks with shields on them." Apple Bloom grunts to herself. "So, our special talent is crusading?"

"Helping ponies with their cutie mark problems?" Scootaloo scoffs. "Does that really happen?" She turns, looking up at Starlight Glimmer. "Oh. Maybe. Sorry."

Sweetie Belle shakes her head before she looks up, her expression brightening. “Oh, hey Garble!” She glances at Rarity before asking, “Can I get a ride to the concert? You were saying something about getting ready for the show.”

“Yeah. I guess I did.” Garble looks down at the Crusaders, his tooth filled maw frowning. “But there’s no way I’m being seen as a steed for a pony. Even one as cool as you.”

“Well, um,” Sweetie Belle stammers, looking around. “Hey, Rarity? We got any sacks?”

Rarity flicks her mane. “Maybe if you ask me correctly.”

Sweetie Belle coughs once, her voice now higher pitched and pleading. “Excuse me, dam?”

“Yes, darling?”

“Do you happen to know if we have any sacks, or other such receptacles large enough to hold myself, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo?”

“Hmm,” Rarity says, pondering. “I don’t believe I do. Not of a suitable material. Perhaps you should ask your sire.”

“Oh. Okay.” Sweetie Belle turns to Doug, opening her mouth slightly as she watches him stuff Scootaloo into one of his larger rucksacks, Apple Bloom already inside. “Hey-”

A hand reaches over, grabs Sweetie Belle by the scruff of her neck and roughly stuffs her inside the bulging sack. Doug lifts the squirming bag to a thoroughly amused Garble, pointing down. “That stops eventually.”

“It better,” Garble grunts out, hoisting the bag to his back. “Hey! No kicking!” He mockingly salutes a worried Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash, flying off.

“Well, I think I should be off as well.” Starlight Glimmer shakes her head. “Sorry. I just know Svengallop’s gotten his hooves all over the lighting again. It’s going to be way too bright and glittery.” She sighs. “It makes Countess Coloratura shine like nothing else, though.”

Applejack chuckles, “Heh, Ah don’t know nothin’ bout no Countess, but Ah knew a ‘Coloratura’ back when Ah was a filly. Lovely singing voice.” She smirks, elbowing Starlight Glimmer in the side. “What’dya think the odds are that that Coloratura and this Coloratura are the same pony?”

Starlight Glimmer shrugs. “Dunno. Earth pony, two tone black and gray mane?”

Applejack pauses. “Y-yeah. Cutie mark of five musical notes?”

Starlight Glimmer nods. “Yup. Rainbow colored.”

Applejack blinks a few times in astonishment. “Wow,” Applejack stammers, lost in thought. She shakes her head, clearing her eyes. “Hey, Ah don’t suppose-”

“Well, I'm heading back to my trailer anyway, so I suppose we can see if she’s free.” Starlight glances towards the tent Applejack was staying in. “By the way, you should probably bring a bottle or five of cider with you. Or something similar.”

“Oh. Didn’t know she likes the stuff!” Applejack exclaims with a smile. “Ah can bring a whole lot more than five!”

Starlight shakes her head. “No, it’s for Svengallop. And he’ll try to weasel every bit off of you, so pack light.”

“Oh.” Applejack turns to the remaining herd members. “Well, Ah guess Ah’ll see all of you at the concert, then!”

“Wait, that’s it?” Twilight asks Starlight, more than a little surprised. “I thought you were, like, going to ask to join the herd or something!”

“Oh, is that a requirement to be your friend or something?” Starlight winks at Doug. “I'm only surprised your herd isn't even bigger!”

“Yeah, it's not that,” Doug replies flatly.

“It isn’t!" Twilight adds, furiously nodding up and down. "I just thought that, you know, you’d give up your fake mark and give everypony back their cutie mark and everypony would be friends just like that!”

“Wow,” Starlight says, eyebrow raising. “You really are idealistic. You know that right?” Twilight nods a little. “I mean, I say idealistic instead of naive because I’m trying to be nice.” One of Twilight’s eyes spasms, a small piece of mane splintering off. “First off, their cutie marks are locked in a big vault back in Our Town. I can’t exactly wave a magic staff and give them all back. I’d have to do it carefully, or risk breaking the matrix holding them, and it was a lot of work getting that big block of crystal there in the first place.”

“Oh,” Twilight says.

“Second, a lot of the ponies in Our Town came to me because they didn’t want their cutie mark. It’s not like I went around brainwashing everypony that stumbled into the place! No, those ponies had pretty big issues to consider removal in the first place. And giving them their cutie marks back without addressing the underlying issues, like you did with me, might not be the best idea.”

Twilight sinks a little lower.

“Hey,” pipes up Lemon, Starlight glancing down at the young yellow mare. “Maybe I can keep helping you with some of those issues? You know, if you or anypony else wanted to talk about it or anything.” She motions to her cutie mark, “Kind of my specialty! And, um, maybe the Crusaders can help the others in your town, too? At least, see if their cutie marks are in helping ponies with their cutie marks.”

“Huh.” Starlight considers for a few seconds. “I’ll have to get back to you on that. Right now, there’s a concert we’ve got to kick off, so I can’t really stand around and chat right now.” She glances to Doug, “But, we’ll still be on for March, right?”

“If you need me to,” Doug says, walking over to rustle Starlight’s mane. “Have fun at the concert!”

“I’m sure we’ll all be equally amused,” Starlight says with a wink as she leaves, Applejack walking next to her.

- Later, at the concert -

Herd Apple watches from some of the further seats along the ground, a few holding binoculars to their eyes. Pomarbo and Meringue are riding on Doug’s shoulders, Lemon on Pinkie Pie and Hedge on Trixie. Fluttershy is cowering just behind Doug, Rainbow Dash is hovering just above, hooting and cheering as the autotuned chords of Our Harmony fades out, the five equally marked ponies waving goodbye and stepping off the stage as one.

The stage goes dark, the crowd quieting down. After several long seconds of silence a single spotlight clicks on. A tall purple dragon rises from the floor, his blond hair covering his eyes. His claws begin to pluck out a medium tempo on his purple guitar; his deep voice, amplified many times over, rings out.

You can’t stay hidden for long;
As night expires, and brings about the dawn,
Life will find another way,
As we return to find more to slay!

As Nickelbangs belts out the last word two light click on. The first follows Garble as he swoops down, dumping three brightly clad young mares out of the monogrammed rucksack. The Crusaders dumbly stare at the blindingly bright lights focusing on them, mesmerized by the roaring crowd. Another light illuminates the drum set, Clump doubling up the tempo. Spike stands next to him, an obsidian stick pounding on a purple cowbell with all of his might and somehow staying in time. To his sides stand Charcoal and Backdraft on their black and purple bass guitars, growling out a deep chorus.

Allies come, and foes may go;
Nothing lasts! It’s all like snow.
Make a blast! That’s what I know,
Our exploits shall be sung through the ages!

Garble joins on his red guitar, everydragon still somewhat subdued. Sweetie Belle steps forward, grinning against the lights. Her sisters take hesitant steps, flanking her as Sweetie Belle takes a deep breath. Her high, clear voice sings out,

Friends may come, and friends may go;
Some go deep and some go low.
Each I keep! That’s what I know,
Since Friendship carries me through the ages!

Garble roars as his claws slam into the guitar, blazing up and down. Fizzle struts in from the side, mirroring Garble as they growl and roar at the Crusaders.

Scootaloo takes two confident steps forward, her shrill voice yowling out to the fast tempo,

Racing ‘round, for the best time!
Giving my all! Only one lifetime!
But after I’m wor-rn down by time...
My friendships! Carry me through the ages!

The music slows, almost reminiscent of a country melody with the twang of the guitars, except for the thrashing drums in the background. Doug shouts, “More Cowbell!”, getting Spike to wail on the metal block as hard as he can. Scootaloo bows her head as she takes a step backwards, Apple Bloom hesitantly stepping forwards to the cheer of the crowd.

Friendships, they all teach us,
Each in their own way.
They all share one thing in common;
Being different? It’s all okay!

The Crusaders step back, eyes closed as they ram their heads up and down to the beat. Garble struts forward, taking center stage, his claws flying over the strings as the beat doubles again.

Some days you wish you’d be a shooting star!
All a-blazing in the sky! Glo-o--rious! *Roar! Ro-ar!*
Burning out! Did you make it that far?
But! Friendship. Makes you! Victo-o--rious! *Roar! Ro-ar!*

Garble steps back as Fizzle steps up, dueling Clump during a two minute interlude of blazing melodies that grow more and more complicated. Garble starts a spontaneous chase of the Crusaders, merrily chasing them about the stage and trying to get them back in the rucksack. But when Garble advances on his own, the Crusaders stand up against him together, driving him off. As the trio cheers Garble gets Backdraft and Charcoal to join him, the three dragons finally able to force the Crusaders into the rucksack in a very over-the-top manner, the trio squealing with raucous laughter as the dragons pantomime smashing them inside.

Garble roars in victory over the squirming bag, hoisting it to his back. The Crusaders poke their heads out the top as the duel between Clump and Fizzle fades away. The guitarists join back in, a more subdued tone, singing the chorus together,

Trials may come, bring bliss or woe.
Yet life rolls on, fast or slow.
What matters - how will you be known?
By friendship? Or exploits through the ages?

Trials may come, bring bliss or woe.
Yet life rolls on! Fast or slow.
What matters - How will you be known?
By exploits? Or your friends through the ages?

O-o-o-oh. And it’s gone...

Comments

[DarkPhoenixx]

Sweetie Belle gradually recovers, awakened from the loud noises; her eyes slowly tracing over her red, pink, and purple cutie mark. They swiftly get wider and wider, then flick over to her sister’s and their newly reattached cutie marks. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo mimic her, muzzles slowly curling larger and larger as a shrill cry pierces the clearing.

Thank God!!!!!!!

[DarkPhoenixx]

Nice! I love the lyrics!

[Silentwoodfire]

I don't know about you, but this song needs more cowbell

[Jack-Pony]

10316045 It's dangerous to go alone! Take this.