My Little Pokemon

by Alabenson

Calamitous Conifers

“Finally! It feels like we were stuck in those stupid pine trees forever!” Rainbow Dash declared as she, Spike and Twilight emerged from the pine forest they had been trudging through.

“Come on, Rainbow, it wasn’t that long. We were hiking through there for half a day at most, and look, you can see the next town from here,” Twilight said as she pointed towards the collection of buildings that lay ahead. “We should be at the Pokémon Center in time for dinner, and then –”

“It’s gym battle time!” Rainbow Dash declared. “I’m ready to take down whoever it is that runs this place and get my second badge already!”

“Don’t you think you should get some rest first? I mean, you’ll want your Pokémon to be completely healthy so they can do their best, right?” Twilight said. At first it looked like Rainbow Dash was going to argue, but then she paused before nodding her head.

“You know, you might have a point there. I want my team ready to give one hundred percent, no, one hundred and twenty percent, and they’re gonna need to be plenty rested to do that.” Rainbow Dash said. “But, once they’re set and rested, it’s gym time.”

“Wow, Rainbow, you’re really fired up for this,” Spike said as the group made their way into the town.

“Well duh, of course I am. Twilight’s already got her second badge, and I can’t let her get too far ahead of me, now, can I? Besides, if Lightning Dust is here then I can’t afford to get too lazy. Lightning Dust might be a reckless jerk, but she’s definitely the type to push herself harder than anybody if that’s what it takes to win. I’ll need to work twice as hard if I don’t want her to start kicking my hindquarters. So,” Rainbow Dash said as she turned back to Twilight. “What kind of gym is this place supposed to have, anyway?”

“I think this might be the home of the Grass-type gym,” Twilight said. “I know it seems like an odd location for that, but it would explain the number of greenhouses they have here.” As Twilight pointed it out, Rainbow Dash and Spike realized that practically ever other building they passed either was a freestanding greenhouse or had a glass-walled structure attached to it.

“Huh, weird. You’d think if these people liked growing things so much they’d live somewhere, y’know, warmer or something,” Rainbow Dash said. “Anyway, if these guys all use plants, then that just means Skarmory’s gonna have an easy time beating the pants off of them.” Twilight rolled her eyes but said nothing as she listened to Rainbow Dash half-plan, half-fantasize about her upcoming gym battle. If Rainbow Dash still had any lingering apprehensions about taking on gym leaders, they were well hidden. By the time the group reached the local Pokémon Center and checked into their rooms, Rainbow Dash had reached the point that she was already deciding on the finer points of her eventual victory pose. “So, when Skarmory and me lean back-to-back, should I be wearing sunglasses or no sunglasses? I know sunglasses are the obvious ‘cool’ choice, but they’re really more of a radical-cool, and I think I want to go for more of an awesome-cool. What do you think, Twilight?”

“I think you might be starting to get a little too overconfident,” Twilight warned as she sat down on her bed. “Don’t forget, this battle is probably going to be a lot harder than the one you had with Terra.”

“Forget it? I’m counting on it!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “Otherwise, how are me and my team supposed to figure out how much stronger we’ve gotten. Besides, you managed to beat that Siegfried guy and get your second badge, right? So, it can’t be that hard, right?”

“Gee, thanks,” Twilight replied sourly.

“I didn’t mean it like that. What I meant was…um…you know what, maybe I should go check to see how Spike’s doing.” With that, Rainbow Dash quicky exited the room, leaving Twilight to collapse backwards onto her bed. It wasn’t that Twilight was upset with her friend, but the comment had served as yet another reminder that Twilight simply wasn’t making the progress she wanted.

Twilight’s contemplativeness was soon interrupted as her Pokédex started honking as though it had suddenly become possessed by a flock of bicycle horns. Desperate to stop the noise, Twilight pulled out her Pokédex to see the words ‘Incoming Call’ flashing on the screen. After a moment’s trepidation, Twilight pressed a button to accept the call, at which point the honking horns were replaced by a voice that was somehow even more irritating.

“Hello, Twilight! I was starting to worry you wouldn’t be able to figure out how to use that little device you yours,” Discord cheerfully greeted Twilight. “I was just checking in to see how you’ve been doing on your adventure. Any luck catching them all?” Twilight didn’t respond at first, instead simply glaring at her Pokédex in annoyance. “Oh, don’t be like that. Besides, isn’t this part of being friends, checking in on them to see how they’re doing?”

“Yes, I guess it is,” Twilight reluctantly conceded, albeit through gritted teeth. “I’m doing fine, I guess. I have my second badge already, and Rainbow Dash should have hers before too long.”

“Only two badges?” Discord asked as he clicked his tongue in disappointment. “And here I was sure you’d have at least three or four by now. Really, Twilight, I know you’re having fun, but you really should try to take this a bit more seriously. That portal back to Equestria isn’t going to open itself on its own, you know.”

“Having fun? I’ve nearly been crushed in a cave-in, got attacked by a couple of thieves and just recently almost got buried in a blizzard!” Twilight yelled.

“Exactly! It’s like you’re living your very own Ogres and Oubliettes adventure! And besides, you’ve come through all of it none the worse for wear, no doubt thanks to the friendships you’ve made with your Pokémon. This little journey will be good for you, you wouldn’t want to end up becoming one of those princesses who spends all her time sitting on her throne, would you? Celestia’s done that for years and just look what’s happened to her hindquarters.”

“There is nothing wrong with Princess Celestia’s hindquarters!” Twilight exclaimed before immediately turning bright red as she realized what she had just said, much to Discord’s amusement.

“Hahahahahaha! Thank you, Twilight, I needed a laugh like that. Anyway, a little adversity isn’t going to be the end of you, you are the Princess of Friendship, after all. You should be more than capable of handling anything in that world has to throw at you.” Discord paused uncomfortably for a moment before continuing. “Of course, you might have just the slightest trouble with a few tiny problems that followed everypony from Equestria.”

“What kind of ‘problems’?” Twilight asked sternly.

“Well, it turns out a few villains, ones that you previously dealt with, may have slipped in with everypony else and are, you know, working on their revenge,” Discord said.

“Wait, what?” Twilight yelled out in horror. “Who?”

“Nocreature too important – Queen Chrysalis and King Sombra,” Discord said quickly while faking a cough.

“WHAT?” Twilight screeched.

“It’s really not as bad as it sounds. Neither of them will be able to use their magic in this world, so they shouldn’t be much of a threat. In any event, I thought you’d appreciate the warning. Toodles.” With that, the line went dead, leaving a fuming Twilight listening to the dial tone. Slowly, Twilight closed her Pokédex and set it aside before grabbing a nearby pillow, slamming it into face and letting out a guttural scream.

“Chrysalis and King Sombra are here? Why? How? King Sombra was destroyed when Cadance restored the Crystal Heart. This doesn’t make any sense!” Twilight flopped back onto the bed, allowing the pillow to fall off her face. “At least if Discord’s telling the truth then they won’t have any of their magic. Ugh, I can’t believe I’m actually relying on Discord, of all creatures, to be honest about something. Then again, I guess right now I don’t have much room to criticize anycreature when it comes to honesty right now. I haven’t even told Spike or Rainbow Dash the truth about how we all got here yet, and to make things worse I can’t even manage to fix my own mess. Some ‘Princess of Friendship’ I’ve turned out to be, I can’t even make friends with my own Pokémon.” Twilight let out a sigh as she pondered her situation for a minute in silence. “I wonder where Rainbow Dash ran off to?”

*********

“Hey, Rainbow, are you sure it’s alright for us to just leave Twilight alone at the center like that?” Spike asked as he followed Rainbow Dash towards the Florasburg Gym, her Skarmory waddling behind her.

“Don’t worry, Twilight will be fine,” Rainbow Dash assured him. “To be honest, I kinda got the impression that Twilight needed a little alone time. Anyway, now that my Pokémon have got an all clear from the nurse at the Pokémon Center, there’s nothing between us and another sweet victory but the poor chump at the gym.” Rainbow Dash continued to chuckle about her impending victory all the way to the Florasburg Gym, which took the form of a particularly massive greenhouse, so large the tops of several evergreen trees could be seen reaching up towards the ceiling over the front façade.

“Whoa, and I thought the greenhouse we ran into before was huge,” Spike said as he marveled at the size of the structure.

“It’s not that impressive, it’s just a big glass box with a bunch of plants in it,” Rainbow Dash said as she strode inside. The interior of the gym bore a strong resemblance to the Pokémon-run greenhouse the group had encountered on their way to the city. Here, however, the plants were grown from beds that seemed to rise up directly from the floor, and the sheer scale of the building had apparently been used to cultivate an entire forest within.

“Can I help the two of you?” a bored voice asked in between yawns. Rainbow Dash and Spike turned to see a sleepy-looking woman sitting behind a desk that had been set up amid a flower patch.

“Yeah, I’m here to take down your gym leader!” Rainbow Dash declared, earning another yawn from the receptionist.

“It’s kind of late, but we are still technically open, so whatever. You’ll find the Inscrutable Mandrake in his grove. It’s the big circle of trees right in the middle of this place, you can’t miss it.” With that, the woman returned to staring intently at the clock near the door. Rainbow Dash, meanwhile, simply shrugged and headed into the gym proper.

“Well, she sure seemed friendly,” Rainbow Dash said sarcastically as she and Spike made their way down a path through the indoor forest.

“To be fair, it is kind of late,” Spike pointed out. “Maybe she’s more of a morning person.” Rainbow Dash pondered this for a moment before wincing and letting out a sigh.

“Yeah, I just remembered how much I always hated it when somepony would show up at the weather bureau with some last-minute – wait, do you hear that? It sounds like it’s coming from over this way.” Spike was about to reply that he didn’t hear anything, but as he listened for a moment, he realized that he could indeed hear a voice coming from a copse of trees deeper inside the gym.

“Am I hearing things, or does that kind of sound like somebody giving a speech or something?” Spike asked as the pair crept closer to the source of the noise. Eventually, the pair found themselves approaching a circle of particularly massive trees that been grown so close together that their branches had come to form a near solid wall. From behind that wall, the voice Rainbow Dash and Spike had heard was now clearly audible.

“TREES! Gods of Nature, hear me! Trees, Trees, accept my office and hear me! Obedient ranks of lace bark maple and golden oak, hear me. Conifers, oldest, tallest and wisest, hear me. Fox elm, staghorn sumac, sweetgum, dewy-budded chestnut, fearless and sturdy, hear me!”

“What the hay is going on in there!” Rainbow Dash asked as she made her way around the edge of the tree circle until she finally came to an opening that led inside, her Skarmory and Spike following close behind. As the pair peered inside, they say that the circle of trees surrounded an entire battle arena, at the far end of which stood a balding man dressed in monk’s robes, who was engrossed in making some sort of plaintive speech to the trees. “Is it just me, or is this just seriously weird?”

“No, this is definitely weird,” Spike confirmed.

“Is someone there?” the man said as he spun around. “Ah, you there! Have you come to join me in communing with the majestic trees?”

“Uh, no. I’m here to challenge the gym leader here. Do you where they are?” Rainbow Dash asked, silently pleading that she already speaking to said leader.

“Ah, so you’re a challenger, then. Well, you’re in luck, for at this very moment you speak to the Inscrutable Mandrake, master of flora, disciple of the trees and leader of the Florasburg Gym. And, as such, I would be happy to accept your challenge.” Mandrake turned towards a large set of cabinets on the far side of the field before pausing and turning back towards Rainbow Dash. “Er, what badge will you be competing for?”

“This is gonna be my second,” Rainbow Dash said as she motioned for her Skarmory to come forward.

“I see,” Mandrake said. “So, you’re still just a sapling, yearning for the sun as you stretch up towards the canopy above. And now I stand as the elder Trees of the forest to block you ascent!”

“Uh huh,” Rainbow Dash said, her interest in what Mandrake was saying having already dropped to ‘crazy Pinkie Pie rambling’ levels. If Mandrake was bothered by this, or if he even noticed, however, it didn’t show.

“This will be a battle between two of our Pokémon each. The first to have both of their Pokémon left unable to continue their desperate struggles shall be vanquished, and their opponent declared the victor! Do you have any questions?”

“Just one. Are you ready to get taken down by me and Skarmory?” Rainbow Dash said as Skarmory let loose a war cry and launched itself into the air.

“You’re certainly confident, but the raging storm cuts down the foolish growth that reaches too high. Go, Lombre!” Mandrake tossed out his first Poké Ball, revealing a particularly bored-looking Lombre which plopped itself onto the field and watched as Skarmory wheeled overhead.

Lombre, the Jolly Pokémon. This nocturnal Pokémon is covered in a film of slime which helps protect it from predators. Lombre are notorious mischief-makers, frequently damaging nets and interfering with fishing lines.

“I don’t know how jolly that Lombre looks,” Spike said as he listened to his Pokédex’s entry.

“If you’re going to talk big about being a storm that’s gonna knock me over and stuff then you should really start off with a tougher-looking Pokémon,” Rainbow Dash added as she eyed Mandrake’s Lombre critically. “Anyway, Skarmory, hit it with—"

“Fake Out!” Mandrake suddenly called out while dramatically throwing his arms in the air. Without even bothering to stand, Lombre promptly clapped its forelimbs together, sending out a shockwave that nearly knocked Skarmory out of the air.

“Okay, so maybe your Lombre’s not a total wimp, but that doesn’t mean we’re gonna be pushovers. Skarmory, give that thing your Air Cutter!” As Skarmory righted itself in the air, it began furiously beating its wings and sending out gusts of wind towards Lombre. At first, Lombre scarcely seemed to even notice what was going on, but the wind was soon accompanied by scythe-like blades of pressurized air that slashed at it and tore up the ground around it.

“It would appear you’re not without your own strengths, but with the raging winds come the rains of life as well. Lombre, use Water Sport!” Upon hearing this, Lombre finally stood up and took a deep breath before exhaling a massive stream of water. To Rainbow Dash’s confusion, however, the Lombre didn’t even attempt to hit Skarmory with the stream, instead spraying the water in every possible direction until the entire field was soaking wet.

“Are you sure you’re really the gym leader here?” Rainbow Dash asked as she looked over the Lombre’s handiwork. “Well, whatever, I’ll deal with that after we’re done. In the meantime, Skarmory! Use Fury Attack!” Skarmory wasted no time diving towards its opponent and launching into a vicious series of pecks and scratches. The first three of Skarmory’s attacks hit home, but when it went in for a fourth, Lombre suddenly dodged out of the way. Propelled by its own momentum, Skarmory couldn’t prevent its leg from striking the ground, where it promptly sunk all the way up to its torso in the newly soaked muck.

“Behold! Foresight worthy of the forest elders!” Mandrake declared as Skarmory began thrashing about in an effort to dislodge itself. “Now, Lombre…Bubblebeam!” Lombre heaved a sigh before taking another deep breath, this time exhaling a torrent of bubbles that seemed to detonate as they collided against the helpless Skarmory.

“Of all the…” Rainbow Dash snarled before gritting her teeth in frustration. “Okay, keep it together, Rainbow. Skarmory needs you to think of a way out of this. Hang on…Skarmory, spread your wings out as much as you can!” Baffled, Skarmory did as its trainer instructed, which resulted in its outstretched wings taking hits from a number of the explosive bubbles.

“Are you giving up already? It’s a shame, if a mild rain such as this causes you to wilt, then you shall never—” Before Mandrake could finish his sentence, Skarmory flapped its wings several times and pulled itself free of the muck, helped by the propulsion provided by Lombre’s bubbles.

“Hah, did you really think you’d be able to beat us that easily? Skarmory, Metal Claw! Show this guy what we think of giving up!” Letting out a screech of indignation, Skarmory dove straight at Lombre and delivered a vicious slash to its side.

“Clever, very clever. But, as the rain gives life, the torrents wash it away. Another Bubblebeam! Lombre, irritation plainly written on its features, blasted out another stream of bubbles at Skarmory. Despite the fact that Skarmory was no longer immobilized, quite a few of the bubbles still found their mark.

“Yeah, I think we’re about done with that. Skarmory, blow it away with another Air Cutter!” With a final shrill cry, Skarmory looped around in the air, sending several air blade-filled gusts straight through Lombre’s stream of bubbles. Unable to dodge out of the way, Lombre took the full brunt of the attack and collapsed to the ground unconscious.

“Alas, poor Lombre. Felled as the noble spruce before the uncaring storm,” Mandrake lamented as he recalled Lombre to its Poké Ball. “And yet, even as the terrible fire that sweeps through the innocent forest is followed by new growth, so shall Lombre’s defeat serve as but the precursor for a greater and even more terrible foe!”

Rainbow Dash and Skarmory both gave Mandrake the same blank in response. “What?”

“Behold! Snover, descend!” With that, Mandrake tossed his second Poké Ball high into the air, unleashing a cheerful looking creature that vaguely resembled a stumpy, snow-covered pine tree that had sprouted arms. Rainbow Dash was somewhat less than impressed.

“Bwahahaha, that’s your big trump card? Skarmory’s gonna take that thing apart!” Rainbow Dash laughed, earning an irritated glare from Mandrake. “Still, I better not take it easy on you. Skarmory, nail that thing with your Metal Claw!” Letting out a triumphant screech, Skarmory dove straight at its target, scoring a direct hit with enough force to send the Snover tumbling along the ground. “Hah, and Twilight was worried I might not be able to handle – did it just get really cold in here all of a sudden?”

Sure enough, as Snover pulled itself back to its feet, frigid just of wind could be seen blowing away from it while dark clouds gathered near the gym’s ceiling. “Fool! Did you truly believe the prince of the aspen forest would be bested so easily? Now, as the cold storm gathers, behold the true might of the TREES! Snover!” Mandrake called out, his Z-ring already flaring with power as he performed a particularly odd, ritualistic dance. “Z-Grass Whistle!”

“Huh?” Rainbow Dash, who had been bracing herself for the onslaught of Mandrake’s Z-move, looked on in confusion as the golden light that had been suffusing Snover expanded outward, accompanied buy a high-pitched whistle. “Seriously, after all that buildup you used your Z-move to make some weird noise? I mean, it’s kind of annoying, but –” Rainbow Dash was interrupted by a wet splat as Skarmory crashed down into the mud of the field, snoring peacefully. “—but it put Skarmory to sleep, so now it can’t battle. Perfect.”

“Now you see the true power of the winter forest! How will you face my Snover now, guarded by the storming hail and infused with power from our Z-move?” Mandrake said as he spread his arms out and twirled in place.

“That’s easy, I’m just gonna fight trees with mushrooms,” Rainbow Dash replied before scrunching up her face. “That sounded a lot cooler in my head. Anyway, go Breloom!”

“I see,” Mandrake said as Rainbow Dash’s Breloom emerged from its Poké Ball. “You intend to turn this into a battle of the very forces of glorious nature itself! Very well, I shall meet you challenge and –”

“Breloom! Mach Punch!” In a flash, Breloom launched itself across the arena and snapped its right arm forward, the red claws at its tip glowing bright white. Panicking, Snover tried to turn to run, but as it did so its stubby legs sank into the mud. Snover was left helpless as Breloom struck it in the side of its face with enough force to send it flying halfway down the length of the arena.

“Oh, that didn’t quite go as I had envisioned it,” Mandrake said after several seconds passed without his Snover making any attempt to pull itself up out of the mud. “It would appear that my Snover is unable to battle, thus making you the victor of this battle. Consequently, I stand before you humbled and defeated.” As Mandrake spoke, he gave Rainbow Dash an elaborate bow that would have seemed mocking coming from just about anyone else.

“Thanks, I guess,” Rainbow Dash said. “So, about my badge…”

“Yes, of course. The enduring symbol of your victory in battle,” Mandrake said as he approached Rainbow Dash while pulling out a small box from the sleeve of his robe. “Oh worthy trainer, for having displayed skill and strength enough to best me, I hereby present to you the Alpine Badge, symbol of the ever green sentinels of the mountainside, as well as a shard of Grassium-Z. May both serve you well in your coming journey.”

“Sweet!” Rainbow Dash said as she opened the box to reveal a pine tree-shaped badge along with a green crystal. “Wait until Twilight hears about this. She’s not gonna believe it!”

*********

“I don’t believe it,” Twilight said as Rainbow Dash finished recounting her victory, with only slight embellishments to make the story more, as she would put it, awesome. “You really went out and challenged the gym leader here without me?”

“Come one, Twilight, it’s not like it’s a big deal or anything. For Celestia’s sake, you had your second battle while me and Spike weren’t there either and we never made a big deal about it,” Rainbow Dash said. “Is there something wrong? You’ve been acting kinda weird recently.”

“It’s…Discord contacted me again while you were gone,” Twilight replied. “Mostly he was just being his usual annoying self, but…”

“But what? Discord being annoying isn’t exactly anything new. That’s basically how he is all the time. I’d probably be more weirded out if he wasn’t acting like some kind of jerk.”

“I know, but Discord warned me that Queen Chrysalis and King Sombra are in this world as well, and that they’re out for revenge,” Twilight blurted out.

“Well duh,” Rainbow Dash replied.

“Wait, what?” Twilight had prepared herself for any number of potential responses from Rainbow Dash, but that hadn’t been one of them.

“It’s Chrysalis and Sombra, of course they’re gonna be trying to get revenge, that’s like their whole thing,” Rainbow Dash said as though she were stating the most obvious fact in the world. “Although, I don’t really get how Sombra got here in the first place. Didn’t the Crystal Heart blast him apart last we ran into him?”

“Aren’t you at all concerned that two of our worst enemies have followed us here and are trying to hunt us down?” Twilight asked incredulously.

“Twilight, this is supposed to be an adventure! Of course we’re going to run into horrible villains at some point. I’ve been expecting to run into Pokémon Ahuizotl or something for days now,” Rainbow Dash laughed. “Besides, there isn’t any magic in this place, right? You know, aside from friendship and how that’s magic, but not the mind control or wrapping us up in freaky cocoons kind, right? But we’ve got awesome, butt-kicking Pokémon on our side. So, even if Chrysalis and Sombra do come after us, we’ll just beat their hindquarters even harder than we did the last time we took them on!”

Twilight simply smiled and weakly nodded her head in response. Rainbow Dash was almost impossible to argue with when she got like this, and in fairness she did have something of a point. The nature of the world Discord had placed them in left Chrysalis and Sombra without the tools they would normally have had to threaten anypony with, and Twilight and her friends were hardly helpless. Still, the situation wasn’t good, and Twilight was left with one more reason to focus all her efforts on getting everypony back to Equestria.

Author's Note:

As a bonus, here's Discord's ringtone

Comments

[Starlight Nova]

10962100
I think he's trying to say a Charizard can't eat him because he's too big.

[Starlight Nova]

Do any of the female human characters in this story throw any punches?

[raven618]

11060081
Which is irrelevant as a predator taking down prey larger than itself is perfectly normal.

[Red Tagg]

Great chapter. Although, I think Rainbow's Tranpinch is due for some training soon.

[Xanderfox]

11060288
Humans aren't Charizard's natural prey, also the species is arrogant and would be more passive agressive

[Xanderfox]

Rainbow did have the type advantage so I guess the ease of her victory makes sense. Lombra's grass moves where useless and water only did neutral damage and Snover was at a major speed disadvantage vs super effective attacks.