Rainbow Dash couldn't stay. What had just passed between them was exactly what she'd feared ever since she'd first noticed the way that Pinkie Pie's gaze tended to linger on her, or the way Dash always tended to be the target of Pinkie's tackle-hugs, or the way she was the only one of Pinkie's friends to have received a pet name from the pink pony. No matter what she'd promised Pinkie, there was no way Rainbow could just take a nap up in Pinkie's bed while Pinkie Pie totally fell apart in the kitchen below.
She almost wanted to go downstairs and comfort Pinkie, but that was a bad idea for obvious reasons.
Rainbow Dash had nowhere to go – not while the doors were sealed. But there was that pegasus door that Pinkie Pie had in her room for some mysterious, unknown reason. Best not to think about it. Dash might not have been able to fly at the moment, but she was good at falling, and with all the snow, her landing would probably be fairly cushioned; she would just have to wait until the wind died down enough for her to at least walk.
Would it be wrong for Rainbow to just disappear? Would that make things worse, or would Pinkie Pie be relieved? If Rainbow Dash were in Pinkie's place, she would feel much, much better if the object of contention just happened to slip away when she wasn't looking. Or... wait. Wasn't that what had happened with Mare Do Well? And wasn't Rainbow still mad about that?
Oh, WHO EVEN CARES?! Rainbow Dash needed to get out of there, so what did it matter? All Rainbow knew was that if she spent even one more second in Sugarcube Corner, she was going to explode, maybe even twice, and that being anywhere else in the world at all would be better than being here.
Rainbow Dash shrugged off the blankets, shedding the comforting, enticing warmth they offered in favor of heading for the window, or pegasus door, or whatever it was. It looked more like a window than a door, although Pinkie had referred to it as otherwise in the past.
The storm was dying down. How long had Dash been asleep in Pinkie's bed? It looked windy still, and the snow was still falling, but softly, now. She could see ponies wandering the streets again, dressed in their hats and scarves.
The most dangerous part of the blizzard was over, and Pinkie Pie would probably feel better if Rainbow Dash was gone. So it was for the best, really, that Dash opened the window, or door, or whatever it was, and jumped.
• • •
Snow did not make a good cushion; something to remember. When Rainbow Dash landed, she sank deep into the snow bank and the shock of the cold upon impact almost made her screech. Luckily, she managed to hold it in, and instead stood up and shook off the snow.
"Rainbow Dash?"
Oh, damn.
She froze. Which might have struck Rainbow Dash as funny at any other time – froze, snow, winter – but the strange thing was, her mind itself seemed to freeze as well, keeping Dash from being able to think of anything witty to say on the spur of the moment.
All she could do was turn and flash Pinkie Pie a nervous grin.
Pinkie Pie was standing in the doorway. Only the top half of the door was open, so that the pink pony could poke her head through and stare at Rainbow Dash in puzzlement. The snow was still too high on the step for Pinkie to open it all the way. Rainbow Dash actually felt grateful that Pinkie wouldn't be able to come outside, although it was obviously terrible to feel relieved that your so-called best friend was unable to leave her house and come see you.
"Where are you going?" Pinkie Pie asked, leaning her head out the door a little as if to get a better look at the pegasus. She didn't look angry, like Rainbow had been expecting, or even especially surprised, like Rainbow also would've been prepared for. Her voice betrayed no real curiosity. It was like she was only asking because Pinkie knew that was what she was supposed to do next, like she was reading her lines from a script. A script that Rainbow Dash had no access to and would've desperately liked to see, just so she could've had some idea of what she was supposed to do now.
"I thought..." the pegasus began before trailing off.
Pinkie Pie's eyes had no sparkle. They were dull. She wasn't scowling or frowning or crying, but she wasn't smiling, either, her mouth a straight line. Her mane hung limp and flat.
How did she do that? Rainbow Dash wondered. It was a good question, one that many ponies before her had asked. How could Pinkie's hair so perfectly reflect her mood? Surely that was impossible; Rainbow Dash didn't know anypony else whose mane could do that, not even Princess Celestia.
"I thought it would be better if I just left," Dash finished weakly. "Because... I don't know."
"It's okay," Pinkie said, and her mouth curved into something that resembled one of her usual grins, but lacked the joy they usually carried. Honestly, how many times was Rainbow Dash going to have to see that horrible not-smile? It felt like Rainbow had been subjected to it at least three hundred times in the past month alone, and forced to acknowledge that it was completely her fault every single time. Was Pinkie Pie ever happy anymore, or was she just perpetually falling apart?
"Seriously, it's okay. Go. I mean, what am I gonna do, right? Lock you in the basement or something? You can go if you want." And Pinkie gave a nervous laugh, one that Rainbow Dash responded to with a nervous laugh of her own.
"Are you sure?" Dash asked, even as she lifted a hoof in anticipation of trotting away. "I wasn't trying to hurt your feelings."
"It's fine. It's fine! I'll see you tomorrow, though, right?"
And Pinkie's voice lifted with pathetic hopefulness.
"Yeah... yeah!" Rainbow Dash agreed, nodding quickly. "Right, I'll see you tomorrow. We'll hang out and do something fun, like we always do. It'll be cool."
"Right!" Pinkie Pie agreed, nodding equally quickly. "Right. Okay, then. Bye, Rainbow Dash."
She shut the door.
Rainbow Dash felt a tiny bit better, for some reason, even though she was still out in the snow with nowhere to go and no idea whether or not things were ever going to be okay ever again. Pinkie Pie wanted to see her tomorrow; that meant she didn't completely despise Dash yet. It meant she at least wanted to try and get things back to the way they were. That was good. That was what Rainbow wanted.
It wasn't until much, much later that she realized Pinkie hadn't once called her Dashie.
• • •
Pinkie Pie watched from her bedroom window as Rainbow Dash trotted away, kicking up little clouds of snow, her mane tousled by the wind.
The way she felt... was hard to describe. If anypony had asked her, she wouldn't have been able to tell them. It was the purest kind of feeling, the truest kind of sadness and love, the kind that words alone were not enough to explain and could only be understood when felt for yourself.
A part of her felt relieved; she'd finally done it, finally told Rainbow Dash how she felt. It was out. Pinkie was a master at keeping secrets, but keeping her own secrets, about and from the pony she loved, were much, much harder. It was like a weight had been lifted, like it would be easier to breathe from now on.
But at the same time, Pinkie Pie felt more restricted than ever – maybe because of the revelation that Rainbow Dash had already known all along. It was like Pinkie had been sitting on these frantic, wriggling feelings for so long that they'd built up more and more until she'd finally burst, releasing them; but the anticlimactic follow-up – the knowledge that Rainbow Dash already knew and just wasn't interested – meant that all that pent-up energy had nowhere to go.
So instead of feeling free and light, Pinkie just felt disappointed, like she'd been expecting something incredible to happen and had been let down instead.
She should've known better. The truth of her feelings had been a secret, a secret that she'd promised herself to keep, and nothing good ever came out of breaking promises and betraying secrets.
It would've been easier if Pinkie had never said anything at all. At least they'd both agreed to pretend it had never happened. If they could really do that, then they could still go back to being friends, and Pinkie Pie didn't want to lose her. Even if Dashie didn't like her the way Pinkie wanted her to, at least she didn't outright hate her, either. That would have to be good enough.
Gummy wasn't the most comforting pet in the world, but Pinkie was all alone right then and he would have to do. So although he wasn't nearly as fluffy or soft as she would've liked, the pink pony lifted him up from his place at her side and gave him a great big hug; the tightest she'd ever given.
"Poor Gummy," Pinkie cooed, even though she knew that he didn't understand her. "Now what'll we do? It's just us two – oh, hey, I rhymed."
He didn't answer. Just stared at her with those big, expressionless eyes. They looked pink in this light. Pinkie Pie knew somepony else with rose-colored eyes, too, but hers were never so empty. They were always crackling with energy and feeling. And they were never quite so reptilian, either.
"That's a good idea, Gummy," Pinkie said aloud, pretending that he'd answered and pretending that she had a reason to want to smile right then. She had to be happy. She had to be peppy and bouncy or else they would hate her. Rainbow Dash wouldn't want to go back to being friends if she thought that Pinkie was sad about what had happened, and Pinkie needed to at least still be friends.
They only liked Pinkie. They didn't want Pinkamena.
"You're the smartest alligator in the world, even if you aren't a doctor."
Gummy blinked in response.
• • •
Where would Rainbow Dash go? It was late, and it was getting chilly again. Even if the actual storm was over, it wasn't especially fun to be stuck outside at night in winter. Dash couldn't fly home, and she couldn't very well turn back and ask Pinkie Pie to let her back inside. Sweet Apple Acres was too far out of town to even consider; same with Fluttershy's cottage.
Whose brilliant idea had it been to leave in the first place? Pinkie's bed had been warm.
She could either go to Carousel Boutique or the library. Preferably the boutique. If Rainbow Dash went to see Twilight, the unicorn would probably find some way to twist everything that had happened into some kind of friendship lesson about how it's important to always remember to brush your teeth or something.
My life sucks, Rainbow Dash thought bitterly. She seemed to have a knack for getting everypony mad at her, especially the few ponies that she genuinely wanted to spend time with.
Because Rainbow did like Pinkie. A lot. She wasn't exactly sure if it was the kind of like that Pinkie had been talking about, because Dash didn't really know a lot about things like that; all she knew about were those shallow, meaningless flings you had to kill time. But she did know that Pinkie was her friend. If she hadn't liked Pinkie Pie so much, then the confession wouldn't have been such a big deal. Rainbow Dash would've kissed her back, they would've messed around for a bit and had their fun, and then Rainbow would've eventually grown bored and dumped her. Pinkie would've been left heartbroken and Dash would've moved on to the next mare in line. But since Pinkie Pie was a pony she was actually fond of, Rainbow didn't want to hurt her that way. She didn't even want to risk it.
But Rainbow Dash had hurt her, intentionally or not. That look of pain in Pinkie's last smile, and the knowledge that she had been the one to break the pink pony that much, almost killed Dash. How could she have better handled it, though? Was there anything Rainbow could've said that wouldn't have totally destroyed Pinkie Pie?
How about 'I like you too?' a small voice in the back of her head chimed in.
Yet that would've been wrong. Not a lie, perhaps, but it still would've been misleading, especially since Rainbow Dash didn't actually know how she felt yet. The line between friendship and genuine love was a very, very thin one.
No. Now was not the time to be having an existential crisis. Rainbow needed to figure out what, exactly, she was going to do, and in the meantime, maybe figure out why she was so bad at planning ahead. And until then, she was going to be doing a lot of walking.
• • •
Mare Do Well was sitting. It was a strange position for her to be in. When in costume, she liked to perch, usually on the nearest available tall building. It looked cool – and since wind speed increased along with altitude, it usually meant that the higher she was, the more her cape would flap or swirl in the breeze, making for a very nice dramatic effect.
Now, though, she just sat. She was still up high; she liked being atop things. But she wasn't posing. Just... sitting. On the edge of the rooftop, legs hanging over the edge the way that green unicorn in town sometimes sat. It was slightly uncomfortable, but she liked the way it left her free to swing her legs in boredom.
If anypony had seen her, they wouldn't have mistaken her for a superhero. They would've just thought that she was a very odd pony with an affinity for being up high. That was okay, though, because she didn't especially feel like a superhero at the moment. She just felt lonely.
Part of her had hoped that Rainbow Dash would've come back, despite what the pegasus had said when they'd last parted, but Mare Do Well had known all along that it was unlikely. So at the last minute, she'd held back and managed to stop herself from heading out. She would've only been disappointed. She'd wanted to go, but she had to accept that she'd screwed up, big time, and that this was her punishment.
For a moment, when they'd last been together, her in her mask and Rainbow Dash actually letting her touch her, she'd actually felt the pegasus start to warm up to her. It wasn't the same as the love she so craved, but still – Rainbow had been friendly, which was more than the mare had any right to expect. When Mare Do Well had cried, Rainbow Dash had tried to comfort her.
And just like before, Mare Do Well had pushed it just far enough to ruin everything. She'd been so, so close to earning just the tiniest bit of Rainbow Dash's trust – so rare, so valuable. And she'd botched it by being unable to control herself. She'd been too forward and had pushed Rainbow away yet again, completely unintentionally.
It was too much for her to expect Rainbow Dash to fall for her immediately, but at the very least, she wanted to know that there was the slightest possibility of Rainbow Dash someday not totally despising her. Even if they had to start again as friends, that would be better than nothing.
A time machine would've been perfect right then. Mare Do Well could've gone back to the day of the very first meeting between Rainbow Dash and herself; only this time, she'd...
Do what? How would she have changed things? Would she have just stood by and watched while some punk tried to mug Rainbow because she didn't want to give herself away? Would she have formally introduced herself? What?
Mare Do Well sighed, and continued to kick her legs fitfully. She was filled with so much nervous energy. She wanted to run, to jump, to burn it off through any means necessary, but she didn't. Instead she sat on the edge of the building, ignoring the vertigo she felt every time she made the mistake of looking down. It was easy to ignore the dizziness when she was running and leaping, because she was never still long enough for the reality of what she was doing to sink in, but she deserved to feel that way right then. It was another self-inflicted punishment. It may have been masochistic of her, but she felt better knowing that she wasn't allowing herself even the smallest of comforts. She didn't deserve it.
She hated this dumb costume. She hated the way she acted when she wore it. She hated Mare Do Well. She hated herself. She hated everything and everypony except Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash, she loved; but somehow that was worse. It would've been so much easier if she could've just shut off her feelings like a valve. If only there was some kind of magic switch that could regulate emotions. Then, once she'd realized how unlikely it was that Rainbow Dash would ever reciprocate, she could've just said oh well and shut it off, and she'd have been able to move on.
As it was, it was like she was trapped, unable to go back to the way things were and terrified to move forward.
It was like she was determined to sabotage herself. The moment she started to get anywhere with Rainbow Dash, she did something stupid that ruined it all. That way, their relationship was kept in perpetual stasis. She would never go back because she'd gone so far already, had already done such extreme things, but some subconscious aspect of her personality was intentionally keeping Mare Do Well from ever getting anywhere else but here.
• • •
Mare Do Well was on the roof.
She was on. The freaking. Roof.
It was so unbelievably contrived and ridiculous that Rainbow Dash half wanted to laugh and half wanted to scream in frustration. How? How could this have happened? Why? Why now?
At first, Rainbow Dash hadn't been sure – she'd thought that it was a trick of the light somehow. But there was no mistaking it. After having totally vanished for nearly a week, Mare Do Well had reappeared somehow. And now, of all times.
Mare Do Well didn't appear to be looking for Dash, though; she was just... standing on the roof.
Or, wait, no – not standing. Sitting?
Whatever. It didn't matter. What mattered was that SHE WAS ON THE ROOF. How dare she? After having just vanished, no goodbye, no explanation at all? How dare Mare Do Well just mysteriously appear out of nowhere, just when Rainbow Dash least wanted to see her? Mare Do Well had said before that it wasn't intentional, the way she seemed to be so good at messing with Rainbow, but honestly, how could she possibly have pulled off something like this accidentally?
There was no way. No. Way.
Rainbow Dash wanted to fly up there right then and chew Mare Do Well out, but at the same time, she didn't. Besides, she couldn't fly, so how was she supposed to get up there?
Well, how does Mare Do Well do it?
Now that Rainbow thought about it, she had no idea if Mare Do Well could fly or not. She had no idea what she actually was – unicorn, pegasus, or earth pony. Mare Do Well had never removed her hat or cape, so Rainbow Dash had no way of knowing.
But... wait.
Dammit dammit dammit!
She had. That time Mare Do Well had lent Dash the cape as a blanket.
Of course Rainbow Dash hadn't even thought to check.
Rainbow had never seen Mare Do Well fly, though; the mare just climbed and jumped everywhere, like a monkey. And if she wasn't a pegasus, then that meant that was her only means of travel, so naturally she would've had to become especially good at it. If Mare Do Well could manage it, then surely Rainbow Dash could do the same; she wasn't about to let herself be shown up by some damn mystery mare who thought she was all that just because she was a pretty awesome fighter.
Rainbow Dash's hooves were sinking in the snow, and she was shivering slightly. Maybe a little exercise would do her good. Warm her up a bit. And it wasn't like Dash had anywhere to be, right? The only reason she'd been wandering the streets in the first place was to try and find somewhere to go, and she had yet to figure out what her best option would be. Rainbow Dash had been leaning towards Rarity's place, but she had no idea how to get there on land; usually she just circled Ponyville from the air until she spotted it and dived.
So how would she do this?
Rainbow's eyes roamed. There was a dumpster. The lid was closed; she could use that. It wasn't too high, so she could jump. And then... a balcony, on the building opposite. Would she be able to reach it? Sure, why not. And once Dash reached the balcony...
Her mind was whirring like a clockwork. The gears were turning.
• • •
"Hey!"
Mare Do Well turned, and her breath hitched.
She saw a sky-blue pegasus, her brilliant rainbow mane in disarray and dusted with snow, chest heaving as she panted. She was glaring at her, magenta eyes flashing. But even if Rainbow Dash was angry, she was there, right in front of her and looking at her and talking to her, which was more than what Mare Do Well had even dared to hope for after what had happened last time.
"What is your problem?" Rainbow Dash snarled, charging forward. Mare Do Well felt a pang of guilt when she saw how her wings were bandaged. My fault, she thought. It's my fault.
"Seriously, what's your deal? You just vanish off the face of the planet and think that's okay? You can't do that, you know!"
But Mare Do Well couldn't speak, because all she could think about was how Rainbow Dash was doing that adorable thing that she always did when she was mad, when her nose crinkled and her face went all scrunchy, and how badly she wanted to grab Rainbow Dash right then and there, and...
"I'm talking to you!" the pegasus barked.
"How did you get up here?" Mare Do Well managed to ask.
"I jumped. Not too hard. You do it all the time, right?"
"Why are you talking to me?"
"Because I want an explanation!" Rainbow Dash shot back. "I spent, like, three nights in a row waiting, and you never even gave me a reason why you couldn't be bothered to show up! What am I supposed to think?"
"I thought you wanted me to go away. So I did."
It was amazingly hard to keep her voice indifferent, especially when she felt like crying. But she didn't want to let herself reveal any emotion, because she just knew that if she let any feeling slip through at all, she would totally break down. She had to stay stoic. She had to stay strong.
And then she sniffed.
She didn't mean to. It just happened. But it was to be expected, she supposed; after all, she'd spent so much time crying, there were undoubtedly still some tears left that needed to be shed.
• • •
Mare Do Well sniffed, and Rainbow Dash froze.
It was easy to forget that Mare Do Well was a pony beneath the mask, a pony who could logically get hurt like anypony else. She would be able to laugh and feel happy and cry and be sad. But it hadn't really occurred to Rainbow Dash that there might be more to her than a desire to manipulate Dash, and now here Mare Do Well was, sitting before her and crying, and Rainbow didn't know what to do.
"You're not allowed to cry," Rainbow Dash said automatically. "You're not the one who got hurt. You're not allowed to cry."
"I know. I'm sorry. But I don't feel like being Mare Do Well right now," the mare mumbled in response. "I don't know why you're here. I don't want to see you."
"You... you... you think you can just do that?" Rainbow Dash shouted, but she could feel her resolve fading. She'd come here prepared to fight, to yell, to vent and take out all of her frustrations on the one pony she'd thought to be the ideal candidate to take it, and instead she'd found this.
It was worse than not seeing the mare at all. If Mare Do Well had vanished, Rainbow could let herself believe that it was because Mare Do Well was holding back for some reason. Now, though, Dash had found her, but as a miserable wreck. This wasn't Mare Do Well holding back, this was Mare Do Well giving up.
And Rainbow Dash didn't know why she cared so much.
She was losing everything she cared about, piece by piece. Because of what had happened to her wings, Rainbow couldn't fly or do her job on the weather team. Her friendships were beyond strained, especially with Pinkie. She didn't want to lose anything else, even if it was something that she hated. Even if Dash resented Mare Do Well and what her reappearance was doing to her life, she didn't want to lose this, too. Whatever it was.
"You can't just back out now, without even telling me," Rainbow Dash finally declared.
"Back out of what?" Mare Do Well asked, sounding bewildered.
"We had a game, remember? A game you thought of? You can't just forfeit! That's not how it works – we have to play it through."
"You... want to keep doing that," Mare Do Well said. It was more of a statement than a question, although she was asking for clarification. "Even though you despise me, and even though you've told me in no uncertain terms to stay out of your life."
"Well, since when have you ever listened to me before?" Rainbow Dash challenged. "Are you seriously letting that stop you? What happened to how confident you were before? You seemed pretty sure you had this in the bag, and now you're quitting at the first sign of trouble? That's not how you get things done! You gotta keep going no matter what, and if something doesn't work, then try something else!"
Mare Do Well was swinging her legs over the edge of the building in a restless way. Her shoulders and hat were dusted with snow. How long had she just been sitting here? It was making Rainbow Dash uncomfortable; she didn't know if Mare Do Well could fly or not, and it was making her nervous to see the masked mare sitting so close to the edge, like she could fall off at any moment.
"The game was dumb," Mare Do Well mumbled. "It was just something I made up to keep you interested. I know you like challenges, so I thought if I made this into one, you'd have a reason to come back."
"Well, I'm back, aren't I?"
Mare Do Well didn't answer, and with a sigh, Rainbow Dash plopped down on her haunches beside her. In the back of her mind, she remembered the way Mare Do Well had come to sit with her that time outside Pinkie's party. It was strange to think that now she was doing almost the exact same thing.
"I don't hate you."
Mare Do Well didn't answer.
"Did you hear me?" Rainbow Dash asked. "I said I don't hate you, okay? I don't like you very much, either, but... but I don't hate you."
"You asked me before why I liked you," Mare Do Well said softly after another moment of silence. "And I wasn't sure at the time... but I've thought about it for a while, and I think I have a better answer, now."
Rainbow said nothing, but she cocked her head a little, looking at Mare Do Well, to show that she was listening.
"I like you because you don't give up on anypony. Even if you don't think things will end up working out in your favor, you still try. Like with me. You don't even like me, but you haven't given up on me. You keep coming back, giving me millions of chances to... to not be an idiot. It's a kind of loyalty – twisted, but still. So... I guess I should've expected it from you. But I think that's what I like best about you. You're giving me as many opportunities as I need to get this right."
"I don't know why," Rainbow Dash retorted, fighting the blush the words brought on. "You don't deserve it. And that's not true, anyway. I'm a chicken. I give up all the time."
"Like when?"
"Like today."
Dash paused, then fidgeted, debating internally over whether or not to tell the mare. She had no reason to explain herself to Mare Do Well, but kind of wanted to. Maybe because in the absence of her actual friends, Mare Do Well was the next best thing. She was close enough, anyway, especially since Rainbow Dash strongly suspected that she actually was one of them. So that meant it was okay to think of her like that. Right?
Rainbow Dash snuck a glance at her companion. Mare Do Well wasn't looking at her, but instead off to the horizon somewhere, still kicking her legs like a little filly who just couldn't sit still for some reason. She looked small.
It was odd, how perspective had such an impact on the way you viewed somepony. When Mare Do Well was standing, there was something impressive about the way she carried herself that made her seem tall. When Rainbow Dash stood beside her, she appeared to be the same size, since they technically were about the same height – but she still seemed bigger, somehow. But now, when Mare Do Well was sitting, she looked very tiny, maybe because of the way her costume almost swallowed her; or maybe it was because Rainbow Dash was, in fact, kind of small, and if Mare Do Well was the same height as her, then she would naturally appear to be so as well.
Whatever it was, there was something about Mare Do Well right then that made her seem less like the imposing figure that haunted Rainbow Dash's every waking thought and more like a pitiful little foal.
"Today, Pinkie told me she liked me, and I rejected her," Rainbow Dash confessed. "I keep thinking that there must have been a better way to handle it, but... I panicked. I didn't know what to say."
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why did you reject her?"
That hadn't been what Dash been expecting to hear at all. She'd been expecting a snide comment of some sort. Some kind of bitter joke about saying good riddance to a nuisance or whatever. Something that would've better fit the jealous way Mare Do Well had reacted to any mention of Pinkie in the past.
"I didn't want things between us to change. But I guess... they already have. Just the fact that she said anything at all, and that I responded... just that was what changed everything."
"Things are always going to change, and sometimes you can't do anything to stop it, no matter how much you want to," Mare Do Well said wistfully. "The only reason I put this costume on in the first place was so that I wouldn't feel afraid to pursue you, but I'm still scared. I thought it would help give me courage, but it didn't. Besides," she added, like an afterthought. "That's not all I like about you, so it doesn't really matter whether or not you accept that about yourself. I like that you're funny and smart, even though a lot of ponies don't really see that in you. And you're also brave and strong and willing to try anything. And you're beautiful."
"Don't even start."
"Start what?"
"I'm not pretty. That's a stupid thing to say."
"I never said you were pretty," Mare Do Well corrected. "I said you were beautiful. There's a difference. Nopony would call lightning pretty, but I've heard plenty call it beautiful. And it is, in a wild and fierce way."
There was a beat; yet another moment of silence passing over them. But it didn't feel strained or uncomfortable. Rainbow Dash had previously been reeling over what had happened with Pinkie Pie, but she was at last starting to calm down. Mare Do Well seemed more relaxed, too, and had stopped kicking her legs in that nervous-twitch way, as though the tension she'd carried was beginning to fade. It was the same for Dash.
Maybe Rainbow Dash was imagining it, but there really was something soothing about just sitting and talking, no matter who it was with. It reminded her of the way it felt to just sit and chat with her friends on a normal day, when she didn't have all these secrets and troubling thoughts looming over her head. It was peaceful.
"Okay, your turn," Mare Do Well prompted.
"For what?" Rainbow Dash asked, pretending she didn't know what the other mare was talking about.
"I told you why I like you. Now it's your turn. Go ahead."
"I never said I liked you, I just said I didn't hate you."
"So tell me why you don't hate me."
Rainbow Dash tilted back her head, looking up at the sky. The clean-up crew had done a good job with the storm, she mused. The sky was clear, barely a cloud in sight, leaving the stars and moon free to shine.
She wasn't imagining it; Rainbow really did feel better having somepony to talk to, even if it was the last pony in the world that she would've seen as a source of comfort. Strange, how she couldn't seem to talk to Pinkie anymore, her supposed best friend, without feeling like her entire world was crumbling – and yet she could sit and chat with her current biggest enemy and immediately feel better.
"Sometimes you make me laugh," Rainbow Dash admitted, rather grudgingly. "I'm not sure if you ever mean to, but sometimes you make these comments that sound like jokes and are actually pretty funny."
"Anything else?"
"No."
"Hmm."
There was another silence.
"You still have flaws, though," Mare Do Well added as an afterthought. There was none of that sulkiness from before in her voice. She sounded completely back to normal – formal diction and a manner that was both easygoing and in-control. It was amazing, how the tone of a conversation could shift so easily. From teasing banter to a heated confrontation to some sort of weepy hurt-comfort thing and then back again, around and around and around in circles. "Don't get me wrong. There's plenty that I like about you, but I also know that you can be brash and stubborn, and that you charge into things without thinking. You can also be rude and tactless."
"Gee, thanks."
"But despite all of that, I like you anyway. Liking a pony isn't about ignoring their flaws in favor of their more positive traits. Love doesn't blind you to somepony's problems, it helps you accept them. If you truly love somepony, you want them as a whole in spite of those flaws. I don't look past them, I work with them, because you're worth it to me."
"So what now?" Rainbow Dash interrupted to change the subject. The conversation was veering dangerously close to sentimentality, something that Dash wanted to avoid at all costs. Even if she'd admitted that she didn't completely despise Mare Do Well anymore, they were far from friends, and Rainbow certainly didn't trust her yet.
"I don't know. If you really want to play so badly, I guess the game's back on."
"Fine."
"You don't like the sensitive romantic approach. You don't like cutesy behavior. You don't like it when I get aggressive. What do you like?" Mare Do Well asked. She sounded genuinely curious. "You said you like it when I act normal, but... I'm not entirely sure how to do that."
"It's not something you try to do. It's just what happens. That's why they call it being normal."
"So just sitting and talking is all right? You haven't hit me or yelled at me yet. Is this good?"
"This is all right," Rainbow Dash acknowledged.
"It's not about sex, you know," Mare Do Well said next, rather unexpectedly, causing Rainbow Dash to almost choke.
"What?"
"You called me a pervert before, but I meant it when I said that I wasn't just trying to seduce you. I want more than just the physical aspect of a relationship with you. But I admit that I can be a little forward, and... and I apologize for that."
"Are you apologizing for practically molesting me?" Rainbow interjected.
"It's just – and I know this will offend you, so I apologize again, this time pre-emptively, for objectifying you – it's just that when you see something you want or like very, very much, isn't it hard to resist the impulse to touch it?" Mare Do Well continued, ignoring Rainbow Dash's question. She spoke in such a reasonable way, as though she fully expected Rainbow to understand what she meant, even though what she was saying was ludicrous.
"Well, yeah, if you're Rarity and talking about a shiny new diamond or something, doofus. You can't do that for another pony. And you know what? I'm starting to think that you're not actually an evil mastermind after all. Just a total idiot."
"That might be it," Mare Do Well agreed thoughtfully. But she sounded pleased, like she was proud of herself for something that Rainbow Dash couldn't quite discern. "Where are you going to go now?"
"I was heading to Rarity's. I don't think I have many other options, and it's getting late."
"Want an escort?"
"No."
"I thought you'd say that. Oh well. It was nice seeing you again, though. I've missed you."
The words were right there, on the tip of Rainbow's tongue. I missed you too.
Mare Do Well rose to go and paused, as if waiting to see whether or not Rainbow Dash would actually say the words. But she didn't, instead swallowing them, shoving them down somewhere deep, deep, deep in the pit of her stomach. If you ignored something long enough, it went away.
The mare sounded a little hesitant when she spoke again.
"Do, do you want to do this again?" Mare Do Well asked. Even though Rainbow Dash couldn't see her face, she bowed her head a little as if to hide a blush she didn't want the pegasus to see. "Like, do you want to meet in the cul-de-sac again? Say, tomorrow night? Like before?"
If it wasn't intentional, it was okay to think Mare Do Well was being cute. That much was fine. Right? As long as Mare Do Well wasn't acting that way on purpose to gain Rainbow Dash's sympathy, then there was absolutely nothing wrong with just thinking it. And the way she was kind of squirming about in embarrassment was sort of cute, in a weird way, although the costume had the added effect of making it seem somewhat menacing as well.
"If we're still doing the game, then I have to, right?" Rainbow Dash ended up saying. "It's part of the rules. We need to meet regularly to... to compare our progress."
"Ah. Right. Well, then, I'll see you tomorrow."
Rainbow Dash was still sitting on the edge of the building when Mare Do Well jumped.
This time, Dash made sure to watch her, leaning over the side and not even blinking, to see where the mare went. She landed on the balcony that Rainbow Dash had used to climb the building before leaping off that into the street somewhere, and then the mare was just a shadow flitting along the alley until suddenly, she was gone. Bizarre, how it could be so simple for somepony to completely vanish like that and later reappear again at will. It was something Dash envied.
Because now that Mare Do Well was gone, Rainbow Dash was suddenly alone and afraid once more, with no idea how to fix things or even where she was going to sleep that night. It would make things much, much easier if she could just make herself disappear until she knew what to do.
She just needed to get through the next day, and then the next, and the next after that, and if she could just do that, then, well, she was golden. She needed to take it slow for a while, no matter how unappealing an idea that may be. It was simply a matter of putting one hoof in front of the other. Taking life step by step, rather than rushing into it the way she was inclined to.
Having a goal made things easier. For the time being, all Rainbow Dash needed to do was get to Rarity's, and then hopefully she'd be invited in.
Not hopefully; it was practically guaranteed. Rarity would never make her sleep in the street. It was unthinkable.
So. That was it. All she had to do. And then she'd work from there. But first, Dash needed to figure out the best way to get down from here.
Very emotional chapter. I love reading this story, seeing the characters gradually change these past 11 chapters has been very... Captivating . I look forward to seeing more of this story
very deep.... it's so.... interesting!
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.~Franklin P. Jones
So... Pinkie isn't MDW? THE FUCK. No, seriously, I'm confused now. You've thrown off someone who's had all sorts of experience with detective work. I can't believe it. Good job, now I just need to keep reading so I can feel like an idiot at the end for not realizing who it was sooner.
Amazing. Another enjoyable chapter. I feel my anticipation for the next building already!
I am very much looking forward to whatever it is you have in store for us next.
(Hey now, ponies are incredibly inspiring! I know they are for me. )
Right, I'm this close to figuring it out. Those in red are pretty much ruled out, while orange are an uncertainty and green are still in it. That's assuming Mare Do Well is one of the mane six.
Rarity - "Want an escort?": Mare Do Well wouldn't offer to come see the pony who she is; if MDW was Rarity, escorting Dash to Carousel Boutique would be a sure-fire way of blowing her cover. The only way through is to barge in and look for her when no-one answers the door before changing quickly; and then there's the question of where MDW goes.
Pinkie Pie - "I know. I'm sorry. But I don't feel like being Mare Do Well right now," she mumbled in response. "I don't know why you're here. I don't want to see you.": Parts of this sentence indicate that it could be Pinkie under the mask based on her current mood unmasked ("I don't feel like being Mare Do Well right now."; "I don't want to see you."), while another part ("I don't know why you're here") basically says there's no connection in knowledge. Borderline, this one.
Applejack is completely unknown, as we've hardly heard from her in a few chapters (if memory serves).
Fluttershy / Twilight - She hated this dumb costume. She hated the way she acted when she wore it. She hated Mare Do Well. She hated herself. She hated everything and everypony except Rainbow Dash.: this sentence, along with others, could indicate one of the socially awkward ones being party to Mare Do Well's reappearance. Talk of a magic switch puts Twilight slightly higher on this list for me, but I'm more sure it's one of these two. (As for the not-flying-thing, Fluttershy doesn't really fly too much in public, does she? She may use wing-assisted jumping ability to get up onto roofs.)
Oh wow, I love this chapter! Mare Do Well and Rainbow are getting closer! I think whenever Rainbow finally gets to Rarity's then things should get more telling from there. Until then my list stays the same.
5. Pinkie: With this chapter I'm taking it to imply that Mare Do Well was sitting on the roof for quite a bit, what with her hat and cape being dusted with snow. And if Rainbow had only just left Pinkie's place there really isn't a way Pinkie could beat her to the roof and have time to sit like that. So once again I stand by Pinkie cannot be Mare Do Well.
4. Twilight: Twilight remains low on my list because of her appearance when Mare Do Well was with Rainbow back in one of the earlier chapters, I highly doubt the use of some duplication spell so without it she just cant be Mare Do Well.
3. Fluttershy: Like everyone else I have to agree with the whole bandage situation, Fluttershy is a pegasus and a caretaker. She wouldn't let Rainbow suffer with a weak bandage just to protect her disguise.
2. Applejack: I really don't have much against Apple jack other than that she is the Element of Honesty and probably wouldn't lie to anyone for any reason. But I also don't see her as a pony that sees herself as weak and in need of a disguise. Apple Jack would probably be more upfront really and would have just gone straight to Rainbow. But that is just my guess.
1. Rarity: And still Rarity is my number one, Mare Do Well was mostly just wallowing in her sorrow this chapter and that is definitely something Rarity has done before. Also everything Mare Do Well has done thus far in trying to win Rainbow over has been cliché romantic but in a sense that she could have easily gotten everything from several romance novels that she has read. And The fact that she knew Rainbow would say "no" to the escort could have easily been a way to excuse herself first so she could get home and change before Rainbow eventually found her way over.
Confound you confusing conundrum of collaborating characters! Let me figure out who is Mare-Do-Well!
For me I believe this is a very good character study more than just a romance or a detective story. All of the character especially Rainbow and MDW, have developed in someway. I very much enjoy this fanfiction, I have my own ideas as who Mare do well is but ultimately have no clue. Quick question though this chapter and the previous rainbow states that she knew that pinkie pie was interested in her. Though in the chapter 7 this is what happened "But seriously, now. D'you know anypony that might wanna go that far fer you?" Rainbow Dash thought. "No," she admitted.
Can You clarify this for me?
One last thing MOOOOOOOAAARRRR.
93317
I'd have to agree with the FS/TS part. Mare Do Well's attitude in this chapter displays some sort of social awkwardness, at least when she's all depressed like that.
A good chapter too, I like MDW's reaction to the more recent turn of events. It'll be interesting to see how she attempts to earn RD's affection without screwing it up like last time.
93386
I agree with you very much. This entire story has been chock full of wonderful character studies. Though I would add, for me, all good romances also involve good character studies. But that might just be me.
I also have similar questions regarding RD knowing about Pinkie's crush. In addition to the conversation with Applejack, in earlier chapters RD seemed confused/disbelieving as to why or whether Pinkie was jealous of Mare Do Well. But if RD always knew about Pinkie's crush, then Pinkie's jealousy would make perfect sense.
*shrug*
Anyway, on to my review proper ...
I do love seeing the progression of all three of our main characters here, RD, MDW, and Pinkie. They're changing, growing, slowly but surely. In particular, I think MDW has progressed the most--she's a long ways from the mysterious, smug stalker of the beginning of the story. And I felt so happy when she popped up in this chapter. I really had missed her ... much as Dash did, though RD was loathe to admit it.
I also love all the atmospheric details. All the little bits you throw in that create the emotional tones and moods of this story. From this chapter, in particular, this line hit me like a punch in the gut (and I mean that in the best possible way):
It wasn't until much, much later that she realized Pinkie hadn't called her Dashie.
Such a perfect, awful note to end that section on.
Also, I feel you on realizing how much time and energy has gotten sucked into fan fiction. I had a similar moment back when I was active writing in the Ninja Turtles fandom and realized I'd written a piece that was nearly novel-length. But good writing is good writing, whether it's fan fiction or original fiction. Dunno if that's any comfort, but it's what I tell myself.
Ah, a rather quick update, and for the obvious reason. Sometimes you just write too much without meaning to and are forced to turn it into two chapters, eh? Yeah, same things happens to me sometimes. I also try to stick around within 1,000-2,000 words with each chapter of my stories, if I can help it. It's best to stay consistent, don't you agree? Anyway, my dear CAD, great work on another chapter. I liked the emotions, both up and down, from Pinkie and Mare Do Well. I really didn't find any errors this time (usually I find one or two; I just don't point them out), so props to you. I suppose your next episode will be out when the new year is here, so good luck to you! Oh, and have a great new year's. Here's my usual suspect chart, since I'm clearly the best at them (yeah, I went there, other readers; take THAT):
1. Rarity - Ugh, I hate moving Twilight down, but this chapter was all about Rarity, in my eyes. Mare Do Well was shown to be doubting herself, over-emotional, over-dramatic, and somewhat whiny. These are all traits of Rarity. Plus, her thinking about things in such detail is clearly the workings of either her or Twilight, since unicorns are more intelligent than earth ponies and Pegasi. People might be weary of that "Want an escort?" line, but Rarity is clever; she probably KNEW that Dash would say no, so she knew that she'd be fine when Dash got going to her boutique. Also, when Dash mentioned Rarity's name, it was said that Mare Do Well was glad that she didn't talk about her further; can you say "relief"? At this point, I know it has to be one of the two unicorns, since you've basically ruled out Pinkie (with her romantic subplot), Applejack (due to her lack of appearances and the lack of hints that point to her), and Fluttershy (due to Mare Do Well not healing Dash's wings properly). It's gonna be fun trying to find out which unicorn is behind the mask in the final chapters (yes, I'm being cocky and saying that it IS one of them). I'm still hoping it's Twilight.
2. Twilight - Most of the traits that I talked about with Rarity also apply to Twilight. Despite being very intelligent, unicorns are also socially awkward; they either are too stuck-up or have weird ways of talking sometimes. Mare Do Well said that she was lonely. Normally, Twilight would say that her books keep her company, but...Spike HAS been gone, so it's very possible that Twilight was actually lonely without the little dragon around. Not much more to say about Twilight; she and Rarity will be jostling between my top spots in the final chapters, I just know it.
3. Applejack - I only move her above Fluttershy this chapter for one little reason: she mentioned loyalty. It seemed a bit odd that Mare Do Well would just bring that up for no reason, so that leads me to think that perhaps AJ isn't quite 100% out of the picture just yet. And, when Mare Do Well talked about sex...well, it IS a cliche to write southerners involving sex and romance (don't yell at me for saying that; I'm just saying I see it a lot). So, despite Rarity being the romantic one, Applejack talking about it wouldn't surprise me. I still don't think it's her, but...the door isn't FIRMLY shut just yet.
4. Fluttershy - Mare Do Well just seems nothing like her...at all. Yeah yeah, she's supposed to be a "different pony" behind the mask...but, really. The way Mare Do Well talks...the way she acts...the way she seems more upfront about stuff...there is no possible way that Fluttershy could somehow gather up all this courage. Plus, it would be out-of-character, and our dear CAD wouldn't do that. A mask does NOT change your entire personality; I don't care if you're Superman, Batman, Flash, Green Lantern, or Jack Black. You're the same as you always are, with or without a costume.
5. Pinkie - For those of you STILL thinking that Mare Do Well is Pinkie...think about it. Sugarcube Corner was sealed in with snow. Rainbow Dash had to use the "Pegasus door" to get out. Pinkie was SHOWN to not be able to get out. HOW would she have gotten out, and then somehow gotten up onto a roof...AHEAD OF DASH? It doesn't matter that it's the fourth wall-breaking Pinkie with all her randomness and oddities. If you think the whole "Twilight can't be Mare Do Well because of her appearing at the same time as Mare Do Well and using a teleportation spell is lame" is a cop-out...well, what would you call this? You CANNOT god-mod Pinkie Pie; you'll just make yourself look like a dumbass if you do that, since that is seriously cliche and a HUGE cop-out. Our dear CAD (Canadian Author Dude) wouldn't stoop that low. Mare Do Well is not Pinkie. Case closed.
Other Possible Suspects: Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo, Trixie, Gilda, All Mane Six (Minus Dash)
Nothing's changed with my "other possible suspects" list. Still holding out in case Rainbow Dash is mentally unstable. Still holding out that Scootaloo has taken her idolizing to a new level. Still holding out that Trixie stuns us all and demands love from an even bigger braggart than herself. Still holding out that Gilda somehow shrunk and is demanding Dash's love again. Still holding out that the mane six (minus Dash and possibly Pinkie) are still all in this together to try and win Rainbow Dash's love. Highly unlikely with all those choices, but it's always good to have a backup plan. Plus, I like having a nice, even list of 10 suspects. Don't we all like even numbers? Well, I'll admit that my lucky number is 13, which isn't even, but...shut up or I'll hurt you.
Good luck with the rest of your story, CAD! I refuse to call you "Anon", since using a part of your username is a cop-out. It's more fun to be creative. *smirks* We all support you and can't wait for more! We love you...in a platonic kind of way! Good luck.
Enjoyed the new chapter : ) Good job.
Still, thinking about pinkie, Sorry, but she deserves it ...
I think ...
I keep meaning to give out a meaningful review, but I'm always beaten to the punch. Ah well.
Keeps getting better and better. Dash's life is more fucked up than a soap opera. One thing I noticed is that Pinkie is more or less out of the running for being Mare Do Well, which surprised me. There's always the chance of getting surprised again, though.
93386
93577
About the Applejack thing...uh, Rainbow Dash was in MASSIVE denial. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
(Inconsistencies like this can be chalked up to me not actually being the brilliant writer so many people are accusing me of being.)
I want to say something about how fantastic this story is and how I can't wait for the next chapter, which will hopefully be up very, very soon, but I feel like everyone else has already said the exact same thing and much more eloquently than me. So instead I'll settle for telling you that I, too, love you, but in a very platonic way, because you are a writing god and are keeping me guessing in spite of myself. Every time I think I know who Mare Do Well is, some new revelation pops up that totally blows my mind. Keep up the good work.
And I'm totally using this chance to shamelessly promote the TVTropes entry, just in case there are any new readers out there that are as hopelessly addicted to that site as I am and are willing to give the page for this story some love. You can find ithere.
The one thing that comes to mind when reading the most recent chapters is a quote from the spider man cartoon series. Not exactly know the full quote, but it's something along the lines of "What do you do, when the mask becomes the real you?" This has the meanings of both literal and psychological. Mare do well's mask being literal allows her to speak freely upon her inner feelings without fears for any repercussions. Pinkie's is psychological. Her normal self is pinkiemania, the one that she doesn't want any of her friends to see, about how shes always afraid and scared that her friends would abandon her. So she puts up her mask, which is the happy go lucky, spastic, pink ball of energy we all know. Now, perhaps Pinkie IS mare do well, just for a moment. Wouldn't it make scene that she hates herself, for not talking about her problems? Would that not, make you bitter and hate everything and everyone for not understanding you? After all, the only one who knows you better then anyone, is yourself.
"Seriously, it's okay. Go. I mean, what am I gonna do, right? Lock you in the basement or something?"
Oh man...
Memories...
I love your characterization.
As much as I don't want it to be Rarity. I'm thinking it's Rarity.
If not her, then I'm guessing Twilight.
I can't see it being anypony else at this point.
Unless of course, Fluttershy is only good at patching up animals?
I love FlutterTwi fics so I'm hoping it's her.
93901
you are a good writer. Its when a story is good that people can find flaws because a good story is fun to dissect. Much better than a Dyslexic Gm as my self, well of course i did have to fix someones half balked attempt at a my little pony campaign.
I love it. I can just imagine the author sitting back, reading the comments with a snifter of brandy and laughing as everyone throws out their thoughts.
93901
It's not a sign of bad writing so much as that you just didn't plan out the entire story beforehand. But we all knew that, as you've mentioned that while you have the ending planned, you're winging the rest. Ain't no biggie.
Besides, it's easy enough to fanwank away by assuming the apparent inconsistency is explained through a combination of: RD's denial, RD wanting to ignore the problem so it will go away (and thus avoiding that one convo with AJ), and RD exaggerating to Pinkie how long she's known about the crush.
Boom, done. :)
Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Pinkie Pie Split and Fluttershy: eliminated.
Applejack and Rarity: still possible.
Derpy: primary suspect. JK.
I love how this story is both sentimental and light-hearted at times. Keep going!
I think this fic has given me emotional whiplash, but I can't tell because my mind is too busy transforming into a giant screw.
I'm also concerned about the fact that my thoughts immediately go to this fic every time something relevant happens in my environment.
img718.imageshack.us/img718/1580/yunol.jpg
Ponies, y u no let us have lives?
In all seriousness, though, this chapter was even more heart-rending than the last, despite the fact that it somehow ended on a semi-positive note. I still think MDW is Pinkie, even with (and possibly because of) Pinkamina (Yes, I'm thinking in that direction) confessing to RD in the last chapter.
What I'd really love to see is some new MDW monologue, and potentially MDW "meeting" Pinkamina and talking with her, in a way that doesn't explicitly define the situation as a hallucination to continue the uncertainty that does still linger. Pleasepleaseplease find a place for that x_X
I'll sum this up quickly:
-It's not Fluttershy, because Fluttershy knows a lot about medicine and injuries and would've actually helped Rainbow Dash when her wings were broken.
-It's not Pinkie Pie for the reasons Tailslover13 explained already.
-That leaves Rarity, Applejack, and Twilight, all of which are equally likely to me right now.
See, people? You CAN state your guesses without a huge wall of text!
94909 But I LIKE huge walls of text...they make me feel good about myself...
IS MARE DO WELL DERPY HOOVES OR NOT?!
95888
Guys, haven't you realized it yet? Mare Do Well can be whoever you want it to be. For you see, she's been in your heart all along...
*flies away on a magic rainbow*
95934
If that's how you end the story, I may just have to not so friendly like punch you in the head...
Computer screens and the inter-webs be damned, my fist will connect with your face!
But I have faith in you, so it's all good
"It wasn't until much, much later that she realized Pinkie hadn't called her Dashie"
Oh god! The TEARS, THEY WONT STOP!
The only pony story that has made me cry is MLD. No other fic has driven me to tears. Is something wrong with me?
The heartrending events of the narrative cause Xirnoch to grow a second EMOTIONS gauge. What are you doing to this poor man??
I'm pretty sure that Mare Do Well is Ditzy, because she is the only non-mane 6/CMC pony that doesn't have an obvious alibi... I mean, why bother to mention her, if she isn't going to be used as background, and in that case, why not add more? and if she is in the story and isn't background (I'm guessing that she could be just for humor... but I really don't think that is the case) then what else is she?
95934 still think its cheerileeeee
All right, here are my secret identity theories based on the eleven chapters so far:
1) Ditzy Doo. As the laughing stock of the entire town, it would be little surprise that our favourite cross-eyed pony would flirt with the possibilities of a new identity. Mare Do Well has sent Dash several letters by post - dangerous pieces of physical evidence that could lead to her civilian identity if Dash were to interview the office workers who first accepted the letters; however, as the mail carrier to the blue pegasus, Ditzy could easily slip these extra, unaddressed letters into her satchel. Now, this last piece of evidence could be a plot hole, but when MDW met with Dash outside of Pinkie's party, it sounded like all of Dash's friends were in the main party room and vouching for each others' presences. If the Mane Six were all watching one another while our masked pony chatted with Dash, who else among the main cast could be the Mare Do Well?
2) Pinkamina Diane Pie. I believe Pinkie when she says she's not the Mare Do Well, but what about her limp-haired alter ego? Pinkamina is timid and pessimistic - just the sort of personality Rainbow would ignore and avoid, and as Pinkie declares, "they only liked Pinkie. They didn't want Pinkamena". This meek split-personality would certainly relish the opportunity to become a different pony, someone bold and brave like the Mare Do Well, and perhaps all of Pinkie's mental constructs are unified by a crush on Rainbow Dash. Being attached to a party-planning pony who sends out frequent letter invitations would imbue Pinkamina with a certain dexterity when it comes to writing - maybe not as good as a unicorn, but certainly practiced. And did Pinkie really just lose focus at Carousel Boutique, or did Pinkamina not want to produce the receipt that named her as the purchaser of the Mare costume? She probably needed a replacement after Pinkie shredded the costume Pinkamina was using to get chummy with Dashie.
Overall, I'm enjoying the story. My one major criticism has to do with the availability of Fluttershy and Applejack's costumes. Twilight, Rarity and Pinke have plausible deniability - each has an explanation as to why they cannot produce their Mare outfits (returned, sold or chewed up) but apparently Fluttershy and AJ just keep their costumes at the back of their closets. If Dash were a little smarter, she could just ask her pegasus and farmer friends to give her these suits (they don't seem to want them). At the least, she eliminates two suspects; at the best, she confirms the Mare's identity when the crime-fighter ends future appearances due to lack of uniform (or when her friend puts up a struggle to give up the cape and mask). It would be nice if Fluttershy and AJ had their own alibis for the apparent destruction/disappearance of their Mare costumes.
I have to agree about that line that keeps getting mentioned about Pinkie not once calling her Dashie...
Oh great, I can't even type it without crying again
I guess I'll end my comment here.
Loving it so far.
Why does rainbow not A. go to store MDW mentioned she was friends with the owner. or B. Check flower shops for people buying Red carnations.
One error i picked up. Earlier in the story Rainbow Tells pinkie that she cant call herself auntie pinkie even though rainbow is younger
through massive nerdism and being terrible I Have an argument that Rainbow is older.
Fluttershy in the Gilda Arc tells pinkie "I'm a year older than you" when in the same situation
If memory serves well Rainbow Was her Senior in Flight school.
As she was known as Rainbow Crash at the time. its unlikely that she actually surpassed Fluttershy simply based on her own merit.
My, my. I have gotten way to fond of this series. It's like... somehow, in a literature-ish like way, beautiful. I do apologize for my lame attempt at giving a compliment, now I see I must practice my english writing a little more.
Instant favorite, this particular chapter... I feel it (more like I read it as something created by the pen of Markus Zusak.
Well, in a clear paraphrasis of the words of Mare Do Well: It is beautiful, not precisely pretty... but beautiful.
I stopped reading the 4th book of Game of Thrones so that I could read this story full time.
This is quite amazing. I'm sorry I didn't read this sooner. But I love your writing style, and this line hit home for me, compelling me to make a comment:
"They only liked Pinkie. They didn't want Pinkamena."
God, there is so much emotion in that one little line. Adding it to this story gave the chapter a dynamic that really hits home with the overall theme of the story. I fully believe Pinkie is MDW. I can just tell you're dropping hints here and there, teasing the reader with MDW's real identity. I'm going to read the whole thing through, not reading any of the comments, just to be sure my assumptions are correct. But thank you for writing this story - it's a wonderful story and I love reading it.
It has to be Derpy! It has to!
I am still leaning towards it being Pinkie. A great chapter! The long (1 or 2 chapter) awaited return of Mare Do Well is upon us. I am glad that I am cramming this story into a single weekend. I would never be able to remember all of what is going on over a week or two. I can't wait to see what else happens between our soon-to-be lovers. Keep up the great writing!
It's Spike.
I'm thinking nurse redheart, she's the only one besides dash that mare talks to that we know of, but there were no witnesses to. And it seems that dash gets hurt a lot, so she and redheart would have ample opportunity to get to know each other.