Nightmare Moon's returned and Twilight captured. In order to survive she must sacrifice everything
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Not much to say about this chapter (shocking, I know). I wanted to slow down the pace and explore Celestia's mindset as well as set up next chapter. Short chapter, but I felt it fit.
977004
Just posted it up.
poor celestia i feel for her. but i wonder please tell me straight is twilight completely gone from the story other than minor mentions? i... i don't want her to satay dead. but at least she succeeded in her job., still though thats quite harsh what twi had to go through. you sir have won my respect tho question how many more chapters till the end?
978891
Should end at roughly 32 chapters. Number subject to change, but currently that's how it's looking in my mind. So we're definitely almost there.
I'm expecting a full-blown war now that Celestia is back. That is, if NMM still has a following.
Oh god, I'm crying tears everywhere. Twilight has done so much and gained little to nothing, and even her greatest act, saving Celestia, is going out the window so she can save Luna.
It's so damn sad.
Wow leave it to Twilight to take heroic sacrifice up to eleven.
You already know you're evil, so congrats. But you may happily know that you and your story is liked by me on both FimFiction AND Fanfiction. You sir are just that awesome.
979073
Yep! That's Twilight alright. An over achiever all the way.
979080
Really? Awesome! Thanks for the double fav. Plus, it's more fun being evil.
The quality of proofreading regressed some in this chapter, I'm actually a bit disappointed because of it.
979110
I actually got someone to proof read this chapter... I am finding this hilarious.
979142 Well to be fair, the sentences are structured better and there are less misused words. BUT, there are a ton of typos, especially missing spaces, and they become really obvious after the 4th or 5th one.
*edit* and there are still sentences like this: "The collateral damage from a fighting within Canterlot would be…" Either get rid of the 'a' or change 'fighting' to 'battle'
979154
I'll look over it now and edit it back up then. Glad that it helped at least.
Quite honestly, I am not so sure I can finish this. I can't... I can't do it. Not with Twilight gone. I will keep the story thumbed up for what is certainly some awesome writing, but I feel I cannot justify keeping this story as a favorite and keeping you watched. Farewell, and good luck on your journey.
979205
I'm too much of a horrible person aren't I? I'd personally suggest you keep going for just one more chapter, but the ultimate choice is up to you. The fic is almost finished though (roughly ending at 32) so you're almost there.
I might try, but... I don't know. Right now I either want to bawl my eyes out or toss my computer out my 4 story window.
979231
I shouldn't be so happy that I got such a strong reaction out of you, but I am. That means I must be writing the emotional scenes right. Anyways, I won't pressure you or anything and I'm glad you've stuck with me for so long. Really happy you enjoyed the fic as well. Hopefully I'll update at the same time every week (which was today) so feel free to unfav and stuff and just check up every week or when you feel like it. Or, if you want, drop me a PM asking for the ending and once I've finished up the fic, I'd be willing to give you the short version. That way you're not left wondering what happened.
Its okay. Really, I'm just a hypocrite, to be honest. I was planning on killing off all of the Mane 6 in my own fic..... But I also know what sgonna happen next.
979304
I'm actually still debating the ending to this fic truth be told (mainly the epilogue) so at this stage it could go either way.
979090
:So what did I get?
DEATH GOD: SOLID A.
: What?! I even set up my legacy to take the fall for the war from someone else! My very name will be synonymous with evil!
DEATH GOD: HMM ALRIGHT A +.
: Yay!
DEATH GOD: YOUR STILL GOING TO PONY HELL.
:
979353
=laughs= I can actually see that happening sadly enough.
I'm already going to pony hell for falling in love with Twilight....
awww you killed twi i hate it when people kill her off if is goes a bit evil(even killing a few hundred ponys is still a bit evil by my terms). all i can say is damn you sir damn you
but a good chapter anyway
Damn that was a beautiful chapter... *tears in my eyes *
I'm fine with Twilight dying like so since her death was not in vain. Although the way you mentioned Trixie absent means she's up to something, maybe researching necromancy to revive Twilight, pls, pls, PLS??? I am clinging to this tiny thread we call hope and hope that it doesn't break.
979364
Did you say, Spirit Realm?
979142
Ok that's bullshit! I swear that there is something wrong with the documents we pass to eachother. It seems somehow between our computers mistakes were added in because I promise you that I did not delete spaces between words. Either they were there already or something is wrong.
Anyway for the review:
yet another sad chapter. That's a good thing I think. This chapter didn't make me react as much as the one before it did but I definitely reacted.
I definitely enjoyed the structure of this chapter, with the letter from Twilight being broken across the chapter slowly.
Now personaly, and this might be just me, but I think Celestia is going to have a hard tome convincing Rainbow not to kill Luna. Or any of the others for that matter except maybe Fluttershy. But Rainbow especially as the element of loyalty would be unwilling to overlook Luna's sins regardless of the cause. Perhaps if they saw Twilight's letter for herself but as it stand I can't imagine Rainbow, AJ, Rarity or Trixie not wanting to put Nightmare's head on a pike. I think that will definitley be a source of conflict between Celestia and the elements of harmony.
Here's a mistake I made on the pre read: "I want you to make into a monster"
I think you'll want make ME into a monster.
The part about Twilight's body being desecrated was definitely a nice touch. It adds a grittier tone to the whole chapter that I think works nicely.
I enjoyed the argument between Cadence and Celestia. It does a good job of calling into question Celestia's capability's while still reinforcing the personal investment many of these characters had in Twilight.
Overall this was a great chapter, but I think the last one was slightly better. Just slightly. This chapter did an excellent job of carrying over from the last one. I really am looking forward to more of this story and seeing how all this ends.
980468
I was wondering if someone was going to pick up on that!
980471
Haven't decided on how the others will react to Luna yet, though I sort of semi have. It'll be... interesting to say the least.
I added the dessicration in because it felt like a nice touch. I mean, it's how I image people to react.
I was half tempted to make Celestia see Phantom Twilight, but I decided against it. She's not that insane or insane at all really.
979205
This.
All my feels.
dammit, i had to walk away from my comp Again!
why is this so fukkin hard to read.
you magnificent bastard, stop writing such sad horse fiction.
980941
=laughs= But it's so much fun!
980501
I can tell that one of the points of your previous chapter was to make everyone butthurt so that thu would skim through this to see if Twi was coming back, and in this chapter your biggest hint was shadow realm!
Now, who wants to see me stick nails through each of my eye-lids?
980948
I'm having a terribly hard time deciding whether i hate or love you.
the next few chapter and how you decide to end this will help me decide, hopefully.
but for now, Screw you! you bastard <3!
Would laugh if Trixie started the rumors. Loved this chapter.
981261
I spent ages trying to come up with a suitable name, but Spirit Realm was the most intuitive one despite the whole connotations with the cartoon. It was pure coincidence and is not a hint at all.
981347
The next few chapters will probably be the last few chapters so stick around to the end! If you really can't decide, you could go for a love-hate relationship.
982336
And people say I'm evil...
982939
Haha, it would make sense though wouldn't it? Twilight took everything from Trixie, not only the village she swore to protect but Twilight went as far as to take the Element of Magic away from Trixie despite being a so called 'monster' even the element knew Twilight was better than Trixie. Seeing this so called 'monster' save the Princess at the cost of her life, wouldn't Trixie do anything she could to defile Twilight's name? Because Twilight is already dead Trixie would be unable to get her revenge any other way than slandering Twilights accomplishments.
Just a thought. A very poorly worded thought, but a thought no less.
EDIT: apparently I don't know how to quote because I just see numbers
983012
That is actually an awesome idea. Hm...
983036
Thanks
There are also other reasons people would believe Trixie when she started that rumor:
-She was at the front of the battle and watched it happen
-People know she was one of the main resistance leaders
-No reason to doubt her because she is a powerful unicorn and knows what trying to touch the sun would do
-Again, wants to slander the monster who killed her villages name
Anyway, posted way too much today. back to lurking, just wanted to say I love your story and this chapter was epically sad. Can't wait till next week
983060
Nah, I've already got stuff planned for Trixie. While it'd be an interesting concept, I don't think it'd fit in with my ideas. Wish I had thought of it myself though because it's actually an awesome concept. Hm... maybe I could work it in somehow?
Thanks!
having twilight reborn as celestia's child would seem like fitting twist considering there close bond even if your probably not going to do that also sad but brilliantly written alas i myself can only write poetry even if i can come up with story idea's
Chapter 24, "... your soul will rip itself apart and you’ll die with no afterlife to look forward to.", to quote Cadence.
Chapter 25, "... I found the ultimate source of energy ... I could feel it pulsating with my heartbeat ... It was the very thing that kept us alive. Plunging both hooves into my very life force, I drew it out ...", to quote Twilight.
1003251
Technically the two are different. One is the soul being ripped apart by two Spirits wanting to claim AJ for themselves, while the other is Twilight channeling her soul and using it as a magic source (and thus no shredding of the soul and therefore remains intact).
1009001
Well, at least she's in afterlife v:
Unless Applejack intervenes with that link she has with Twilight :V
Loved it. I've been following you on fanfiction.net anonymously as Yuki, and I'm so glad you decided to post here! I'll repeat what I said for chapter 25, whether Twilight lives or dies, you have made my day with her dramatically touching death. Celestia's anguish over it is just icing on the cake. I did catch the thing about the Spirit Realm tho. I also wonder if we're gonna see Gaia again. Whelp, I'll be looking forward to Thursday @ roughly midnight!
1009864 Yes. Yes she will.
1013420 You! Glad you're following here where you've got an account so I can actually reply now. I'm glad you enjoyed the scene so much, I really tried to get it right. I'm looking forward to the next update as well, but for a different reason.
1015876
The alicorn creation story was actually a sudden brainwave I got while writing the fic that I managed to slot in so it's more a bonus than anything else (even if it did end up being rather central). Glad you're enjoying the fic so much though!
I FUCKING LOVE YOU YOU ASS HOLE
also i remember you mentioning (luna's story?) that one of the princesses wondered if the mortal portion of the elements would be reincarnated and twilight died a wielder even if she loses it to trixie in death i wonder if they planned for there being to suitable bearers at once but have where one will die and be reborn where she/he will be of age to take over the element from the now dead bearer
or since there's the river Styx shes going to umm crap whats greek mythology's heaven called
1016651
It's more the Elements are the harmonious part of Gaia when Luna and Celestia split Gaia from her insanity (forming the Nightmare). Technically, reincarnation is part of the death mythology of the world (though I've yet to mention that) even though it wasn't originally part of greek mythology (it was later added in some versions).
1019853FORESHADOWING FOR THE WIN
MAKING PEOPLE THINK YOUR FORESHADOWING BUT YOU'RE NOT ALSO COUNTS
Wow, you even got Flicka commenting, it's a party now (no sarcasm). That said, that has to be one of, if not the, most heartwarming and touching letters I've read. No, I'm not gonna- damnit that's so sad! Yes, it's brilliant and a totally twilight move, but why did you have to be so damned noble twilight? Seriously, as if this poor mare hasn't given enough already, now she's giving up the last bit of dignity she had in death. How can anyone that self sacrificing be called a monster?
No offence but it is rather anticlimactic if you leave spelling errors everywhere. You even have a spelling error in the last sentence and because of that I can't take it as seriously.