Chapter 22
When Celestia departed to go and check in so that their absence could be explained, Gosling approached Luna right away, knowing that he had a perfect chance to speak to her alone. He was worried, they were all emotional right now, but something needed to be said and he had an opportunity.
“Princess Luna?” Gosling bowed his head and tried to look as respectful as possible as he approached.
“Yes?” Luna’s eyebrow arched and a look of cautious curiousity could be seen upon her face.
“I was hoping to speak with you, while we had the chance.” Gosling looked around Celestia’s personal chambers and thought about everything he hoped to say. He swallowed and wished that he had a drink of water. He felt a little dehydrated, the flight back had been exhausting, as it had been all about altitude gain to return to Canterlot.
“I am listening,” Luna replied. That arched eyebrow portrayed endless strength...
“Princess Luna—”
“You will call me Luna,” Luna commanded. The sort of strength that held up a crown.
“Luna…” Gosling bowed his head. “We both have something in common.” He lifted his head and looked at Luna. “We both want Celestia to be happy. I wish to be practical about this issue and hope that we can find an amicable arrangement.”
Eyebrow still arched, Luna listened.
Terrified, Gosling plowed onwards. “I just want Celestia to be happy. I have… I have strong feelings for her already. There is just something about her. I know that you want your sister to be happy. I will do anything you ask of me… I will be your slave if you will give me the chance to make her happy—”
“Stop.” Luna’s voice was a soft whisper, but it made Gosling stop. He froze and he felt sweat rolling down his neck. His stomach churned and he heard a squelch from deep within himself. He felt a cold prickle of fear at the base of his dock that went creeping up his spine, to his neck, up his crest, and then he felt his ears grow cold.
Luna drew herself up to her full height, towering over Gosling by a full head, and said, “You do not need to convince me. You and I shall make an arrangement, but I need time to think, and you do as well. Have no fears, Gosling, I will do nothing that will jeopardise our impending marriage.”
At these words, Gosling let out a fearful whimper. His ears drooped and he looked embarrassed, but it had escaped him before he could trap it within himself. He felt icy cold sweat trickling down the inside of his thighs and all around his groin.
“Be calm, my little pony,” Luna said in a low, soft voice that very few ponies ever got a chance to hear. “I can give a hundred years of my life to my sister. She deserves that. The time will pass like flowing water.” Luna’s eyes narrowed. “As for the two of us… we can be friends. We can work together for political gain. We can be allies and you can be a pony I can trust.”
Gosling nodded, glad that Luna, Princess of the Night, seemed propitiated.
“Or perhaps, in time, we shall grow to love one another.” Luna shrugged. “Make my sister happy, and I shall be your most devoted servant.”
Bowing his head, Gosling nodded, but never took his eyes off of Luna’s. It felt as though he had sand in the back of his throat. “Majesty, it is I who should serve you.”
“Are we to argue upon who serveth who?” Luna asked.
Freezing in place, Gosling did not know how to reply. Luna was a far smarter pony than he was and no doubt, she was testing him. Everypony was testing him. Was this the crucible that Raven had spoke of? Everything was now a test. He thought of Celestia’s disappointment with him and how much it still hurt. He was so tense that breathing was painful. He wanted a drink. He was starting to feel sick again—a wave of nausea washed over him, causing him to feel lightheaded and dizzy. He didn’t want to barf on Luna again, it would be pushing his luck for certain if he did it twice in one night.
“You will do whatever you can to make me happy out of a desire to make my sister happy, and while I respect that, even admire it, it is not the same as trying to make me happy for the sake of making me happy.” Luna’s voice was cool and collected, and her expression was one of utter calm. “Perhaps when you approach me with a genuine concern for my interests, I shall reevaluate my feelings and desire to have you as both a bedmate and a sire for my foals.”
Before Gosling could reply, Luna vanished in a flash of light and ozone.
Standing in the doorway, Celestia looked upon Gosling as he slept. She felt a lonesome ache in her heart as she looked at him. His sleeping face looked troubled, his ears twitched, and he whimpered in his sleep. She could hear his troubled stomach gurgling from where she stood.
A small bed had been brought in for him during the week he had stayed with her in her chambers at Cadance’s command. A small sitting room had been repurposed so that he might have a space to sleep.
Blinking, sighing, Celestia wished that he was in bed with her. She missed having a warm body in her bed. When Cadance was little, Cadance had slept with her, and there had been sleepovers with Twilight and Cadance both. A smile caused the corners of Celestia’s mouth to curl upwards as she thought about the happy memory. She had fond, warm memories of little Twilight’s bedtime checklist, each little box had to be checked off, or she could never go to sleep.
She admired Gosling’s resilience. So far, he was handling all of this rather well. He had been thrust into the gauntlet with little preparation and he had dealt with blow after blow. He had charm and panache. His youthful vitality and verve for life made him endearing, both to her, to Luna, and no doubt, the press.
Still, she worried. Gosling wouldn’t just be marrying her—he would be marrying a nation. All of her duties would extend to him as well. He would have to be responsible. He would have to serve. It wasn’t enough to just be a consort, no, she would never allow that. Celestia wanted a helpmate as well as a bedwarmer. There was a tremendous amount of work that Gosling would have to take on.
Celestia’s job wasn’t easy. She had to go back to school soon herself. There was a whole new field of science that she needed to know about so that she might make better, more well informed decisions. Aside from gelotology, which Celestia was eager to learn more about, there was the far more pressing issue of sustainable ecology. Natural resources weren’t infinite and a wise ruler squandered nothing.
Sighing, Celestia stepped into the room where Gosling slept, so that she might kiss him upon his cheek before she went to bed. The day had been long, far too long, and she was weary. A part of her wanted to lift Gosling and steal him away to her bed, but she knew he would be upset. Sleeping together was something married ponies did. There were too many embarrassing issues, like morning wood in need of waxing.
Reaching his side, she lowered her head, kissed him, and then backed away, wishing the days would pass so that she might have him in her bed, so that she might know blissful, happy slumber.
The smell of strong coffee was like a slap in the face when Gosling entered Raven’s offices. The scent was so strong that he had an involuntary shudder that made his whole body shake and caused his ears stick straight out from his skull. His armor clanked as he tried to recover.
“You can take off your helmet and armor if you wish,” Raven said as she looked up at Gosling. “You’ll have a nice, quiet, relaxing morning in here with me. I mean that, I’m not trying to scare you or anything. I need your help.”
“Okay,” Gosling said as he began trying to get his helmet off.
“Have some coffee,” Raven said in an inviting voice. “You look a little rough. You feeling okay?”
“I’m not feeling good,” Gosling admitted in reply as he set his helmet down upon a battered wooden table by the door that was covered with beat up looking courier bags, scroll tubes, and wadded up rain cloaks.
“Stress.” Raven said the word with a dismissive huff and made a waving gesture with her hoof. “This is the life we’ve chosen. It isn’t easy, but this is a job like any other. Somepony has to do it.”
Gosling, who had shrugged off his armor, set it down upon the table beside his helmet. He turned, his muscles tensing, and he looked at Raven. “What will I be doing?”
Raven gave a sidelong glance at the telegraph bench not too far away from where she was sitting and she pointed with her hoof. “I understand that you’re close to having your mastery certification in the operation of a telegraph.”
Blushing, Gosling kicked his right front hoof with his left front hoof. He nodded, feeling bashful and not knowing why. Perhaps it was the faint praise he thought he might be hearing in Raven’s voice. “I’ll be the youngest operator with mastery certification once I have it. My hooves are fast, quick, and skillful.”
“Celestia is certain to declare them a national treasure,” Raven said in a flat deadpan.
Choking, Gosling, provoked by Raven’s statement, had his brain flooded with an idea of what he could do with his hooves. There were places on a mare that he could tap out a love letter and send quite a message. His face burned with inner fire and the heat in his ears was painful.
“Have a cup of coffee,” Raven said to Gosling as she chuckled, “and then get ready to get some work done.” She gave Gosling a wink, lifted her pen, and then went to work, finishing the dispatch on the desk in front of her.
Entering Raven’s office, Celestia had herself a look around. Gosling was hard at work at the telegraph. She paused for a moment and admired the speed at which his hoof was moving. She felt a shiver and then tried not to think dirty thoughts as she bit her lip. A hoof like that against the right places on her body… the thought made her nostrils flare and she felt her dock clench in a most delightful way.
She set down a stack of papers into a basket on Raven’s desk, then cleared her throat. “Raven, the morning petitions.”
“I was coming to get those,” Raven said in an apologetic voice. “It wasn’t time to pick them up yet.”
“I don’t mind,” Celestia replied. “I was finished a little early, so I thought I’d drop in.”
“And see Gosling?” Raven grinned up at Celestia.
“Of course.” Celestia beamed and glanced over at Gosling, who was still hard at work, hunched over the bench. Those hooves! Distracted, Celestia stared until she heard Raven clearing her throat. She returned her attention to Raven.
“Damage report from last night.” Raven sat up straight and did her best to look serious. “Twilight released most of the reporters before she uh, began her public lecture on the social contract of civility, but she detained the instigators and the known troublemakers. Turns out Twilight has a knack for remembering faces and cutie marks.”
“Oh dear,” Celestia gasped. She wondered when Twilight might start rounding up troublemakers on a regular basis for lecturing. The thought was worrisome and she made a mental note to have a word with Twilight. The lecture halls had to be at least inviting and comfortable and could look nothing like camps.
“Twilight has returned to Ponyville with her parents and Spike. She’s a very busy princess. She also left a message with me.” Raven set down her pen.
“And that message is?” Celestia asked.
“Twilight says that she approves. She also said not to be too harsh on Cadance—”
“Those two little hooligans are plotting against me!” Celestia cried in a shocked voice. “I’m so proud… but I still want to wring Cadance’s neck because of what she did. Ugh, I feel so conflicted.” Celestia’s brows furrowed. “I can’t believe I was outsmarted by a foal.”
“You taught them to be devious, you said it would be beneficial.” Raven paused so that her remark would have time to sink in and she began to organise the papers on her desk with her magic. She lifted the papers that Celestia had placed in the basket and began to sort through those as well, applying little stickers of various colours to the different signed documents, and placing them in colour coded bins.
“So, how is the new telegraph operator?” Celestia asked. She saw Gosling’s ears perk as she spoke and felt warmth go blooming through her heart. He was adorable. She glanced down at Raven and saw the ghost of a smile upon Raven’s muzzle.
“He’s fast,” Raven replied, “he’s already cleared through most of the night’s backlog. Remains to be seen if he’s accurate, but I’ve been assured that he is. I think he’ll get more done before noon than most of my previous help managed to do with a full day.”
“Might I have him for lunch?” Celestia asked.
“You want to eat poor Private Gosling?” Raven stared upwards at the white alicorn before her with a look of mock horror. “Do you have any idea what sort of scandal that might cause?” Raven paused and shook her head. “As your most trusted assistant, I must ask that you reconsider any acts of cannibalism.”
Turning pink, Celestia’s jaw moved, but no words came. What could she say? It was a slip of the tongue. She heard Gosling chortling and she hoped that she hadn’t caused him to be distracted from his task. Sending flawless dispatches was of vital importance. Equestria depended upon error-free communications. She glanced at Gosling and sucked air in through now clenched teeth. Those hocks of his were delicious looking—Gosling had thrusting legs. He also had a trim, athletic backside.
“You’re drooling,” Raven said in a disgusted voice.
With a slurp, Celestia rid herself of the evidence of said drooling, sucking up the ribbon of slobber that was dribbling down her chin. “No I’m not!” She felt mortified. She was behaving very much like a school filly… in fact, she was acting a bit like Cadance did when she began to have a life threatening crush on Shining Armor. Poor Cadance, who couldn’t go back to school because she had popped a wingboner in class and was going to die from embarrassment if she ever showed her face in public ever again.
It was last night, Celestia thought to herself. Gosling had come in to save both her and her sister Luna. Gosling might not always do the right thing, but he could be counted on to act. He was young and impetuous, but that could be harnessed and utilised. Last night, Gosling had shown himself to be the sort of pony that she could love, wholly and without reservation.
“You’re still staring at my telegraph operator,” Raven said to Celestia, “the one you threatened to eat.”
Turning her head, Celestia leveled her most magisterial stare upon her secretary and most trusted assistant. It was a stare that she had spent centuries practicing. It was a stare that had prevented wars and ended conflicts before they even started. Raven did not appear to be impressed.
“I am going to go and read the morning papers,” Celestia said in a dismissive voice, “and check in on the strategic gossip with Blueblood.” Saying nothing else, Celestia turned and departed from the room, but cast a final glance over her shoulder so she could get one last look at Gosling.
- Om nom nom nom!
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"Hey, Bob!"
"Yeah, Frank?"
"That new operator? The one in Raven's office..."
"Yeah?"
"He just started typing out 'S.O.S.' repeatedly. Should we worry?"
"Hrm. The Princess must have shown up."
"Ah, so nevermind then."
7175167
SHE'S GONNA EAT ME!
derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDcvMjQvMTFfMjdfMTdfNTMzXzM4MjI1MV9fc2FmZV9waW5raWVfcGllX3ByaW5jZXNzX2NlbGVzdGlhX2FuaW1hdGVkX3NjcmVlbmNhcF9jdXRlbGVzdGlhX21tbXlzdGVyeV9vbl90aGVfZnJpZW5kc2hpcF9leHByZXNzX2Nha2VsZXN0aWFfbGlja2luZ19saXBzX2FydGlzdF9jb2xvbl9oYXNicm8iXV0/382251__safe_pinkie%2Bpie_princess%2Bcelestia_animated_screencap_cutelestia_mmmystery%2Bon%2Bthe%2Bfriendship%2Bexpress_cakelestia_licking%2Blips_artist-colon-hasbro.gif
7175173 s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/ec/6e/95/ec6e958d7ce3583607f3a114a508f6e3.jpg
7175173
Uh... is Pinkie vying for left overs?
7175186
Naw, Pinkie is throwing a 'So You Want to Eat Your Coltfriend Party.' She's there to offer tips and advice.
7175193
....poor Cheese Sandwich. He will be missed.
Tia, please don't eat the poor duckling. I would have to add this story to my clop faves if you did.
7175173
Well, what do you expect? She's already gotten a look at his all-day sucker....
I can sympathize with Celi here. Duck, Dove, Quale, it's all fantastic meals.
And she swallowed Sir Gosling's sword, and there was great rejoicing!
Gelotology?
7175515
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Gelotology
7175521
That's a real thing?! I thought it was some made up study of a thaumatalogical sort. My apologies.
7175532
7175521 I always love it when a story teaches me something new.
kudzuhaiku how do you get all these chapters out so fast? Like are you just typing it up this fast or is it already pre written?
7176631
Mwhahahahahahahahahah... only my Patreons know my secrets!
7176634 cdn.meme.am/instances/500x/46126333.jpg
7176644
I have a chapter ready to post right now. And it would be posted, but I'm waiting for some editing to happen. Might post it anyway. I dunno.
7176648 Well I was just curious as to why this story is updating at least once if not twice a day. And that leaves one of three options.
1) You are writing this story up really really fast
2)It is mostly pre written and you are releasing at least one chapter a day
3)You have a team of people helping you write this story
7176656
My typing speed (when I have the right keyboard) has to be seen to be believed. And this is with messed up fingers that have been broken too many times to count and stricken with arthritis. I work very, very hard at this because this is my job a the moment. The chapter is actually visible to everybody right now because I made the link public. It can be found in the Weed World group forums, if you are interested.
There have been days when I have put out six or seven chapters of different stories, each chapter 2k+ words longer. It is not uncommon for me to deal with 20k words a day in total on a busy day, given chapter rewrites, editing, and touching up. I can spend 12 to 20 hours a day writing. I'm not a team, I am a single person, but I do have some help with editing and typo spotting, The people that do that are fabulous folks and I can't thank them enough. I keep the worst hours imaginable and sometimes chapters are done at 2 in the morning or even 4.
7176665 Thanks for all your hard work, I'm loving this series - and the previous! - very much.
As for your prolificness, I daresay I'd be lucky to write so much with a neural interface and a universal cure for akrasia!
United by a common love of Celestia, eh?
Ooo, maybe not.
Quick and clever hooves.
My god, and edibleness!
Don't worry. She's not going to eat him. Nibble a little, maybe....
She may not eat poor private gosling, she said nowt though about tasting Goslings privates :p