• Published 17th Apr 2016
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The Perilous Romance of Swans - kudzuhaiku



And lo, there was much honking and rejoicing in Canterlot when Princess Celestia announced that she had a suitor...

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Chapter 21

The cold night air helped to clear Gosling’s head and eased his feelings of feverish fatigue. He didn’t need to do much other than glide as he followed after Celestia and Luna in the dark. They had left without guards, departing without so much as a word, taking flight from Celestia’s balcony. Luna had carried Gosling for a time, but the cold air had helped him to recover and come to his senses.

He was dead tired. It had been a long day. The past few days had been trying. Gosling was stressed almost to his breaking point, or at least it felt that way, each time he reached a point where he was certain that he was done for, he found a little more of himself to give. He thought of what Raven had said about dumping him into the crucible. It seemed that he was already there.

Is this what it would be like as Celestia’s consort? Going from one crisis to the next while scrambling to find happiness in those precious quiet moments in between? Always wondering when the next crisis was going to arise? Gosling was becoming privy to the sorts of things that common ponies didn’t know about. He had seen the alicorns, the very ponies that many saw as goddesses, sweat, bleed, and suffer. He had seen Celestia at both her best and her worst. A little over a week ago Cadance had introduced him to the real Celestia, with chapped, bloodied, chewed up lips, over-preened wings, and a face full of nervous tics.

She was as flesh and blood as he was. Since that time, his entire world and everything he believed in had been turned upside down. He had been introduced to the real power players of Equestria. He had been shown a reality that he wasn’t sure that he was comfortable with. He had seen a viciousness in his fellow ponies that made his own experiences in secondary school pale in comparison.

And now, he was gliding through the dark of the night, following after two sisters, one whom he loved and the other he seemed tangled up with, following them into the Everfree forest, doing so without question or reservation. What was wrong with him? Sane ponies didn’t go into the Everfree at night. What would his mother say? He hoped that she was okay. Maybe she was in her apartment, having some quiet time, or perhaps she was with Twilight Velvet and Night Light.

He wondered what his mother would say if he married Luna. How would she feel? How would she respond? Gosling didn’t love Luna, but he respected her. Celestia’s disappointment over his response still stung, he didn’t like letting her down and causing her to be dismayed with him, but his answer had been honest. He would do whatever was required of him—he would do his duty, whatever that might be, and he would do so without complaining. His mother taught him that a stallion—and a husband—did whatever needed to be done and did so without complaining. No shirking. Shirkers deserved to have their ears boxed.

Perhaps some arrangement might be reached. Gosling intended to pull Luna aside and speak to her in private. In the back of his mind, he wondered about all sorts of things, like if the sisters ever became jealous while sharing a husband. How did that work? How did herd marriages work, anyway? Careful arrangements and agreements? Ponies could be possessive. Gosling knew that he was possessive. He didn’t know what to make of this and he was far too fatigued to give it clear, concise thought. All of his current thoughts were jumbled and tumbled together in his mind.

Below, a ruined castle loomed large in the darkness, illuminated by the moon and stars above. Gosling knew this place, he had heard the stories, he knew the history. This was the castle of the Royal Pony Sisters, the place where Princess Celestia had done battle with Nightmare Moon to save Equestria from eternal darkness.


In silence, Gosling followed the two sisters as they navigated a treacherous path down some crumbling stairs. They had entered into some dark, spooky mausoleum, gone through a heavy door that had been remarkably well preserved as well as sealed with magic, and then down deeper into some catacombs.

Deeper and deeper they went, passing by old urns, bone shelves, and statues of ponies now forgotten by all, except for perhaps the sisters themselves. Gosling followed in silence, his stomach still hurting, his back muscles spasming from stress. Spiders scurried away as the sisters brought light into the darkness. The dust was thick and undisturbed.

Gosling saw statues of alicorns as they passed. He wanted to ask questions but didn’t. This place had a strange magic all its own, it was solemn, sad, there was something in the air that made him feel mournful. One of the alicorn statues looked like a young filly, perhaps about his own age. He wondered if it was just a statue, or if it was a representation of a real pony.

“Luna, dearest sister…”

“Yes?”

“This might be difficult to see.”

“That is to be expected, when visiting the grave of your long dead husband.”

“No… Luna… you shall see soon enough.”

The sisters lapsed into silence once more and Gosling followed. He turned and looked at a statue of an alicorn stallion and saw a nameplate mounted on the stone. Tempus. There was much to be learned here, but Gosling remained in silence. He wondered who Tempus was and what he was like. What did Tempus do?


At long last, they came to a small crypt deep within the catacombs. Celestia touched the door with her horn, which made it glow for a second, and then the door opened. Celestia stepped aside from the door and allowed Luna to enter.

The crypt was rather large, narrow in width and long in length. There were several statues in the room. Gosling followed after Celestia, who went in after Luna. Almost right away, Luna stopped before a dusty, cobwebby statue of an alicorn. Gosling heard her sharp inhale of breath.

“Luna, beloved sister, devoted mother, adored wife…” Luna’s words were little more than a faint whisper as she spoke, reading the plaque.

It took Gosling a moment to realise that he was looking at a statue of Luna. He stared, stupefied, unable to say or do anything. Behind the statue was an urn tucked into a cubby in the wall. The statue was Luna sized and every detail had been captured. Gosling took a step backwards, it felt wrong to be here, it felt wrong to be witnessing this moment of shock and grief. He bumped into the door, but found that it had closed and would not open.

“Castor and Pollux needed a way to mourn their mother,” Celestia said, offering a whispered explanation. “In time, the truth became muddled and muddied… Nightmare Moon murdered many that night, including the beloved Princess Luna, the quiet, sometimes impish but funny Princess of the Night.”

It became so quiet that Gosling could hear tears splashing down upon the dusty floor, like a faucet left dripping. The colt didn’t even want to breathe—he didn’t wish to disturb anything. He stood with his backside against the door, his eyes stinging, fighting back his own tears.

“Many mourned your passing. Those that loved you were more than you know.” Celestia bowed her head and gazed at her sister through half closed eyes. “I am sorry, Luna.”

Stepping forwards past her own statue and memorial, Luna went further into the crypt. She stopped at another statue, this one smaller, it was mounted on the wall. She lowered her head, her ears were twitching, and her whole body trembled. Gosling watched in silence as she touched the statue with quivering lips, kissing it for a moment, and Luna closed her eyes as her lips lingered against the stone.

Gosling wanted to be anywhere other than here right now. This was almost too painful to witness and he wasn’t certain he could bear it much longer. He could see the pain etched upon Celestia’s face. For something that had happened a thousand years ago, the agonised expression upon Celestia’s face made it seem as though it had only happened yesterday.

“Bronze Blaze, I am sorry,” Luna murmured as she opened up her eyes and pulled her lips away. She extended one wing and caressed the statue’s cheek. “He was a pony of the day. I longed to have him spend the night with me, but he always fell asleep. He was such a hard worker. I was so selfish and asked so much of him.”

“And he was always so happy to give you whatever he could,” Celestia said to her sister. “He was an earth pony like no other.”

Ears perking, Gosling could no longer keep quiet. “He was an earth pony?”

Both Luna and Celestia nodded.

There were a million questions that Gosling wanted to ask, but he kept them to himself. Now was not the time. His ears drooped back down as he watched Celestia and Luna move further down the long passage that was the crypt.

“Castor and Pollux,” Luna said as she stopped before two statues, one of a pegasus and the other a unicorn. She looked at them, her eyes narrowed, and for a moment, Gosling could see his mother, Sleet’s face, in place of Luna’s.

“Castor was a brilliant tactician but also a wastrel,” Celestia said to her sister in a soft, warm voice.

Luna’s head jerked about and she looked at Celestia wide eyed. She blinked a few times, tears streaming down her cheeks, and looked surprised by what her sister had said.

“Castor never married. He refused. He did however, sire hundreds of foals. Every place he went, there would be a rash of births eleven months later. He was prolific.” Celestia shook her head and her ears drooped. “I could never reach him.”

Luna began wiping her eyes with her foreleg while sniffling. “I suppose I should be proud.” She let out a cough, sniffled some more, then asked, “And what of Pollux? Please tell me that one of my sons was respectable and was not a progenitor of bastards.”

“Pollux had some real magical talent. He settled down early, married at the age of twelve, served the Empire with his mind, sired six foals that lived into adulthood, and died at the ripe old age of forty one, having had two wives. The first died in foalbirth when she was fourteen after five years of marriage. She had two foals that lived into adulthood. His second wife gave him four foals that lived into adulthood and she survived to the age of twenty one, enjoying twelve years of marriage. She was greatly loved by all those who knew her. Pollux adored her and understood the value of a good wife after having outlived his first.”

Gosling was stunned by what he heard. He saw Luna nodding, a look of relief upon her face. He saw Celestia’s head turn and he could see her rose coloured eyes looking at him, reflecting the light from her horn.

“Those were very different times, Gosling,” he heard Celestia say. He couldn’t argue with that. He swallowed, his mouth felt dry and dusty. Tears were still streaming down Luna’s cheeks; Gosling wanted to go to her and comfort her, but he remained rooted to the spot. Right now, things were complicated between himself and Luna.

“Did I have a nice funeral?” Luna asked.

Celestia nodded, chewed on her lip for a moment, then found the words to respond. “Yes you did. I delivered a stirring eulogy. Castor ate part of your funerary wreath because he was hungry and sad.”

Gosling couldn’t imagine what it must have been like, delivering the eulogy of the pony that had just tried to kill you and had killed your husband. It was a scenario that he had trouble even fathoming, yet this was something that Celestia had lived through and endured.

“His hunger was unmatched. He was a no good teat biter.” Luna nodded in a wistful, knowing manner and stepped away from the two statues. “I desire fresh air and no longer wish to fill my lungs with the miasmas from this resting place of the dead.”

Gosling saw Luna looking at him, and he could not read her expression. Her eyes were sad though, and full of regret. After a moment, she looked up at her sister and he heard her say, “I am sorry. I feel so bad—”

“Luna, I wish you would quit punishing yourself,” Celestia said, cutting her sister off.

“I too, wish I could stop punishing myself,” Luna replied. “Come, I wish to be away from this place. Gosling is exhausted and only remains upon his hooves out of a foolish sense of duty to the both of us.”

Nodding, Celestia caressed her sister’s cheek with her wingtip. “Let us go and return home…”

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