Coco Pommel has two problems. A horrible boss and a dark, vulgar side of her just crying out to take over the mare’s life and try to solve all her problems with cussing and violence.
There's just way too much in this chapter for me to comment on every single thing, so I'll just pick and choose a select handful of things.
Look, I feel bad not buying anything. Coco frowned as her stomach began to growl. Which I would have done since we’re on lunch break if we—I had any money!
You forgot to de-italicize the non-thought part in the middle there.
Whatever… I bet that fucking messed up marshmallow with purple springs and a horn sticking out of it
What does Sassy Coco have against Rarity?
Coco kept her head down as she walked through Manhattan’s
Manehattan
Rarity’s expression changed immediately to one of wonder and awe. “This… this gloriously forward thinking bag belongs to the Hipsterdouche?!”
Rarity’s look of disappointment only increased, but then suddenly disappeared as her ears perked up and her eyes went wide. “Can I touch it?”
…Two bits.
“Five bits,” Coco uttered before her face flushed red and she covered her mouth.
Oh, Coco...
… This stupid bitch KNOWS even most the dumbass ponies of this world ignore that spooge-brained pony’s advice, right?
Hey, if Hoity Toity started walking around with a cow patty on his head, Rarity would buy a cow patty for every day of the week.
WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR ISSUE?! THE BITCH IS PRACTICALLY THROWING MONEY AT US AND ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS MAKE A STUPID BAG! GEEZ! IT’S NOT LIKE WE’RE DANCING AROUND A POLE WHILE PONIES WITH MASSIVE HARD-ONES STARE AT OUR ASS AND TITS!
That would require actual self-respect. Far more than selling foil and duct tape trash bags requires, anyway...
I TAKE IT ALL BACK! I LOVE THIS BITCH! SEE IF SHE’LL MARRY YOU!
What?! NO! What if she wants to do stuff… in BED with me?!
You mean what if she straps on a giant purple dildo and wants to pound your precious, puffy, pale, pussy?
You're obligated by law to write that now, you know.
The article was so popular, in fact, that Hipsterdouche immediately became a pony to keep an eye on… At least to a few ponies with deep pockets. Sadly, this just meant more ridiculous activities Coco was dragged to as his financiers hoped the broken clock that was Hipsterdouche would be right again at some point.
This assumes he was ever right ONCE.
WELL FUCKING JUST STICK A CHAIR UP SOME PONIES ASSHOLE!
There's probably somepony there who'd PAY her to do that.
So...Coco's making ends meet by bilking Rarity, a good friend who HELPED her?
Wow.
Just...wow.
She didn't get Coco out from under Suri fast enough.
The sad thing is that those bags would probably have a lot more structural integrity if there weren't any duct tape. Well, one of the sad things...
It is sad to see Rarity blinded by fame. I know this is meant as an extra-silly story, but that's going rather overboard. Of course, the very existence of Hipsterdouche makes it clear that taking this story seriously isn't a good idea.
In any case, I look forward to the inevitable and glorious release of Sassy Coco on an unsuspecting Equestria. I just hope her suffering isn't too prolonged beforehand.
Fucking magical. Just as funny as that one time I went to a ranch and there was a guy trying to deep throat a enormous horse cock. Keep it up you pussy fuck
There's just way too much in this chapter for me to comment on every single thing, so I'll just pick and choose a select handful of things.
You forgot to de-italicize the non-thought part in the middle there.
What does Sassy Coco have against Rarity?
Manehattan
Oh, Coco...
Hey, if Hoity Toity started walking around with a cow patty on his head, Rarity would buy a cow patty for every day of the week.
That would require actual self-respect. Far more than selling foil and duct tape trash bags requires, anyway...
You're obligated by law to write that now, you know.
This assumes he was ever right ONCE.
There's probably somepony there who'd PAY her to do that.
So...Coco's making ends meet by bilking Rarity, a good friend who HELPED her?
Wow.
Just...wow.
She didn't get Coco out from under Suri fast enough.
Oh, lord, I cannot wait for the inevitable meltdown!!
She gon' fuck shit up!!
Poor Coco. I really hope something goes right for her... but everything going wrong is just too funny. I can't tell if I'm a horrible person or not...
My first thought upon seeing the title was 'Scrappy Coco' and once that was in my head I had to see what the fuck this was about.
Can't wait for the inevitable moment she snaps.
5848166 It will be GLORIOUS. Everyone, bring your cameras!
5848072
Got these! Thank you!
Forgot to right-justify this.
Brilliant chapter! I'm loving the story so far!
5848902
Thanks! Fixed! Glad you're enjoying the story!
Oh my god, Rarity. Why?
I am looking forward to the point where Coco simply has no bucks to give anymore.
5850138 she will tell douche:
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The sad thing is that those bags would probably have a lot more structural integrity if there weren't any duct tape. Well, one of the sad things...
It is sad to see Rarity blinded by fame. I know this is meant as an extra-silly story, but that's going rather overboard. Of course, the very existence of Hipsterdouche makes it clear that taking this story seriously isn't a good idea.
In any case, I look forward to the inevitable and glorious release of Sassy Coco on an unsuspecting Equestria. I just hope her suffering isn't too prolonged beforehand.
Fucking magical. Just as funny as that one time I went to a ranch and there was a guy trying to deep throat a enormous horse cock. Keep it up you pussy fuck
10/10 would cuss again
5848952 Umm... I think you're making Rarity a bit too obsessed now. It's funny as hell, but as disturbing as heaven for me.
Rarity, I'm so disappointed in you.