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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Looks like I'm waiting after work to read this chapter.
6929288
I look forward to seeing your reaction.
6515594 The link is broken. Please fix it.
Is the sex in here graphic?
Bad puns, gotta love e'm.
6929567
No sex yet, but it will be there. Probably about as descriptive as your average clopfic, but I'm going to try for high-class pr0n.
That was very good. I would have liked it if Darren had a bit more fun with Dashie, especially if he gave her a hug when she was worried about him both for legitimate comfort and to screw with her, but their interplay was still the highlight of this half of the chapter for me and I am really looking forward to their future interactions now that he has an easy weakness to exploit with her reaction to being called cute. It was also nice to see him coming to more of an understanding with Faran, but I feel like the real payoff for that is going to be in future conversations, especially when she feels comfortable enough around him to open up more about her past. The upcoming section with the others is also looking like it is going to be great once you really get into it, but that is the next half of the chapter.
6929705
Thanks. It's good to hear you praise one of my chapters. Lets me know I actually did something right.
Incidentally, I get the feeling from this and other comments on this story that you're a fan of The Dash (and RD x Human shipping to an extent). Am I anywhere in the ballpark with this? Just curious.
6929606
Just trying to give everyone their RDA dose of pun-ishment.
6929755 Happy to help, and you are more or less on the money with the second, although I do want to take a minute to clarify things there. While it is definitely true that Rainbow is my favorite character in the show, she is an enormously complicated character who is very hard to get right. You are one of the few people who seems to be able to reliably nail her, and to make things even better Darren and to a lesser extent Faran play off her beautifully so basically every scene with Rainbow is gold. That obviously means anything that gets her more page time is a good thing in my book so I would definitely be happy to see her eventually join the herd, although I see that working best if you have her floating as a close friend for a while as she stubbornly refuses to acknowledge her soft side that wants some love until something breaks.
Also, do you have any plans to bring in a stallion to have a second guy in the herd? That always struck me as a very interesting potential dynamic described in Xenophilia, but it was never explored there so I would really like to see you explore that possibility, especially because you already have five mares that could easily get involved.
When Darren gets a load of what is normality in Ponyville he'll freak. Poor guy might not live through it. And between this and The Lone Riser I think I might get cuted to death by Tink. So a Der-bear stare huh? What's next is he gonna start driving a cloud car around Equestria Jimbo?
Worth the wait.
6929801
You know, it's funny. I often feel like Pinkie is the hardest one to get right as far as characterization goes. As far as plans for Derren's herd, however, you'll probably be disappointed to know that RD will not be joining. She will, however, remain a very close friend of Derren and his herdmates, so at least you'll have that.
I also have no plans to introduce an additional stallion to the herd. Derren's not psychologically equipped to see another stallion as anything other than a competitor for his mares' affections, and Faran will see the drama bomb looking for a place to happen from a mile off.
6929954
Tinkabetes. It'll get ya every time.
Speaking of Tink, the "Sorry-Off" gag was inspired by an "Alternate Mane 6" fic I read a while back called The Twin Students of the Sun. There's a scene in there where Sunset Shimmer and Fluttershy get into a "Sorry-Off." Yeah, you can imagine the hilarity that ensued there.
6930257
Thanks!
6930314 I used to think that about Pinkie, but then I got some very simple and enlightening advice about her from AdmiralTigerclaw:
"Pinkie is your best friend."
Basically, she just wants to make everyone smile and feel good. It is easy to loose track of this because the writers of the show frequently use her for cheap gags and lazy plot setups at the expense of her character (something that Rainbow got hit hard by in season 4 as well ), but so long as you keep that simple truth in mind it is hard to go wrong with Pinkie. If she is being written properly, she will be saying and doing funny things to make those around her and the reader laugh, but she will never hurt anyone. Thanks to her canon randomness, those actions can be just about anything so long as you keep that simple rule in mind and she will remain in character so she is actually deceptively simple to write.
As for Rainbow, that is fine by me so long as she gets plenty of page space. I can just see her getting drawn in quite easily thanks to how well she gets along with Darren and her own psychological fragility. After she builds up more trust in him, all it will really take is one good hit when she is relatively alone and she will be crying in his arms and on her way into the herd. Hell, he can even be the source of the hit because she will be feeling insecure about being single (among other things) even if she doesn't admit it, so seeing him loving the others while in one of her introspective moods will do the job just fine.
As for a stallion, I can definitely see it happening. After all, he will have to get over those feelings of competing for attention no matter what because his girls will be loving each other as well as him which will trigger those same feelings just as much as a stallion (or crazy griffon doctor ) would. He would naturally have to develop a strong bond with the stallion in question before bringing him on board so he could trust him with his girls, but he could very easily wind up seeing the new guy as being under his protection even more so than the girls, especially if the stallion in question was on the timid side. Hell, depending on who he winds up with, the stallion might be the only one he could really be protective towards because most of the girls he is bonding with are more than capable of taking care of themselves.
6930314 Yeah it will. Not that I mind though. I do feel a need to address this however
Blasphemy! All teasing aside I can write for Pinkie in my sleep, maybe literally. I find her to be painfully easy to write for myself Jimbo.
I do realize that not everyone has that going for them though.
6930435 you think having multiple men In a relationship would be the same thing as multiple women? I'm pretty sure most men that I know (myself included) somehow found ourselves in some kind of polygamist relationship, we would be fine with the women doing whatever they want together, but would hit the berserk button if it was with another man, no matter how much we like the guy. It's pretty hard wired Into our brains that other dudes are competition when it comes to the romantic/carnal side of things.
Sure, some dudes are more open about it now a days, but Derren doesn't seem like that kind of dude. I know I am not that kind of dude, especially not when it's with a significant other.
Suca sé , Gorm .
6930924 No, I did not say anything about a man, I said a stallion. The species difference is very important here for bypassing a lot of those hardwired competition instincts. Also note what I said about how it would help if the stallion was more timid to bring him under Darren's protective instincts because while ponies can talk and are functionally people, they still look animal enough to trip the livestock protection instincts.
6931471 If he looks at them as livestock/animals, and is a well adjusted Human being, why would he be banging them? Either he sees them as people or not - and men (typically, by nature) are territorial and compete with other males for females. There is no 'share'. And species absolutely does matter, as Derren is a Human male. If a mare wants to be with him, I imagine they would be willing to accept his quirks, much like he would be expected to accept any of theirs.
The furthest I could see any stallion/man being introduced into the equation would be as a one time thing to act as a stud/sperm donator, if there is no magical solution to reproduction, and if they do not want to adopt. Some women (mares, if you want to be picky) want the kids to spring from their own loins, as it were.
This all being said, word of god (the author) has already stated that there will be no stallions in his herd.
6931501 Instincts don't follow that intellectual understanding. He may see the ponies as people, but his base instincts are always going to recognize the fact that they aren't human so they are not valid breeding partners and thus not subject to reproductive jealousy.
6931442
It's referencing NBC's "The More You Know" PSAs.
High class, eh? Have you read Sophistication and Betrayal? Rarity and a human, but the reason I mention it is it's a bit less... biologically descriptive in its sex scenes than Xeno, a style which may or may not have some inspiration in terms of class. You wouldn't have to read far (it's a bit of a doorstopper) since it picks up in the middle, interspersing flashbacks to fill in the beginnings with the typical HIE signposts. That said, it's quite good so it's not likely you'd hurt yourself reading it (an Eddings fan fearing a doorstopper is not a thing anyway).
Speaking of Rarity, her eating popcorn alongside Dash while watching Derren and Faran go at each other (erm... argue) got a loud laugh out of me. Rainbow I could see doing that but Rarity was surprisingly funny. I also really enjoyed Rainbow's speed-assisted imperson... imponynations? It's always a high point in the show for me when she does one of those; two at once was a nice touch.
There's a lot of speculation about a forming herd in the comments but that feels like it's a long way off. Derren barely has his feet on the ground and it's all still pretty out there for him, which feels about right. That said, the gradual growth in understanding between him and most of the ponies is pretty heartwarming, so maybe something precipitous will speed things along? On that note, will we be getting a version of one of the Honey sisters from Xeno here? Derren's only had his own issues to deal with, or his circumstances if you prefer. Some form of antagonism seems inevitable, but what form...? I actually feel like it might help him, sort of like Faran likes their fighting, but it's just something that occurred to me. Ponies seem pretty accepting most of the time. Minotaur in town? Neat, let's see his seminar. Griffon, eh? Well, we'd be friends if she wasn't a jerk (and later, in spite of same). Dragon? Let's politely ask him to sleep elsewhere while Rarity tries to mug him (which was either crazy awesome or too dumb to live, ymmv). If anything, Zecora feels like an outlier... I blame the cloak.
The whole harmony thing is well done. With how often it's happening it genuinely feels as grating and disruptive as it likely does to Derren. Without that frequency I might not have shared his feelings about it (what can I say, I've known Pinkie longer than he has so it doesn't jar me so much) but between that and the visions it feels like something that needs to be resolved in some way other than acceptance. And there's nothing like problem solving to bring folks together. Hope it all works out.
It sounds like Tink is from elsewhere but I don't know of her. Winningverse character? Anyway, looking forward to the second part of this. Enjoy the weekend. There's some holiday tomorrow involving cards and flowers and such, and if you post that second part by then I'll have something to do for the day.
More dammit, more!
Faran is just too amazing. I love that Derren and Faran are starting to understand one another. I love that Derren stimulates (eyebrow wiggle) Faran's intellectual side. I love that Faran has lovely, green eyes. F*ck, I just love this damn story (Faran, jk the whole thing).
I can't wait for more Jimbo. You an amazing guy.
6931713
There is some serious antagonism against Derren in the works, but it's going to be on a slow burn for most of the fic, and will come from a particular source. One that he's already met. By the time things come to a head, Derren will have plenty of reason for hating said antagonist (and vice versa, to an extent).
As for Tink, she's from a different fic altogether: The Lone Rider, by my good buddy BikerPon3.
And since you mention the Winningverse, I should note that Winningverse Cloud Kicker will be in full swing in this fic.
Or in Cloud Kicker's case, "Let's take him out for a night of wild banging!"
6931818
Methinks someone wants to cum inside Nurse Faran.
Not to worry. More will be
cummingcoming soon!6931952
Yeah, I think I recall who you're referring to there, but no sense going into details. Knowing that it's ongoing (which I'd merely suspected) is more than enough.
I err... haven't actually read the source material of that particular incarnation of Cloud Kicker, but it's referenced enough in other fics I have read to get the idea. If I'm right, you pulled the Ponyville weather service's basic structure from there, including the way they all call Rainbow 'boss' and so forth. Kicker herself is a ponified, gender swapped Charlie Sheen's character from 2 and a half men, if I understand correctly (which I may not since I've only seen snippets of that show in the break room at work). That didn't entice me to find and read it, though I doubt I'd regret doing so... it just strikes me as the kind of humor I only want in small doses, not a full fic of it. Though I do remember Raindrops' warning to Derren about her... I'm looking forward to that meeting quite a bit.
6931952
Nah, it's more like I enjoy watching relationships develop. Faran, no doubt (shot in the dark), is going to become a somewhat (seems the type) affectionate and protective of Derren. I bet she has a softer side to her she only shows to very close friends.
The comment section says he is going to have a herd (I had a feeling). If (when) Faran becomes a part of it, her position screams (at least to me) combat medic. Extremely protective and caring of her herd mates. Don't hurt her or her mates or she will fucking stab you.
i.imgflip.com/sqtko.jpg
Now ship it.
One step closer to putting the human penis in the pony vagina.
Ship it very hard.
Such an adorable mare.
I really hope this is me, but I read 'Der-bear Stare' as 'Care Bear Stare'.
I really think it's me, because I keep saying 'Care Bear' before correcting myself to saying 'Der-Bear'.
I will not hate myself for this or regret it.
Good to know Raindrops will keep Derren in line if Faran isn't around.
Help, Its The Der Bear Bunch.
6930314 was my commentary on Pinkie helpful?
6932010 That story is a bit of an odd case. On the one hand the OCs/background ponies the story centers on are fantastic and absolutely worth reading, but on the other hand basically everything that ties in with canon is a complete and total disaster. I would still recommend reading the first half or so of the story because it is worth reading so long as you skim over the horrible mangling of Rainbow's character, but you will want to get out before the disaster that is his handling of the changeling invasion which starts when Cloud thinks her mom is a traitor. I think the best way to summarize that story overall is that Cloud is one of my favorite background ponies thanks to that fic, but I wound up giving it a thumbs down at the end of the day.
I like it a super good chapter.
Can we have a drawing of Nurse Faran please?
Just for reference.
6933184
Yes it was. Thanks.
6933973
Funny you should mention that. There's a bit of an issue with with that, and it has to do with Faran's coat pattern. I can't draw for beans, so I tried both the 2D and 3D pony creators. Both do a rather poor job of rendering a roan coat pattern like Faran has (not to mention that she basically has Fleur's body type, which is another thing neither pony creator can do). I can post pics of both attempts in a blog post, if you wish, but if you want a decent drawing of the smexy Irish tsundere pone, you're going to have to go bug Pusspuss.
6933184
Thanks actually an interesting enough endorsement (always a fan of brutal honesty) for me to give it a look, thank you.
i.giphy.com/8fbeFbshnfyJW.gif
You have no idea how much I want best human to make an appearance. Like, I'm on the edge of physically hurting something if she's not around soon...
6934770
Best human (great minds think alike, eh?) unfortunately won't be making an appearance until the next fic in this series, outside of random Music of Harmony-induced hallucinations. Her role in the Derrenverse is somewhat complicated, and involves heavy spoilers for the series.
(And yes, I know "Derrenverse" is a pretentious verse name. I couldn't think of a better one, unfortunately. )
6935089 Next...fic?
i.giphy.com/2Gd6pjcsZdjSU.gif
Next fic....
i.giphy.com/6a8KuPwJR3R4s.gif
And at the rate you're going, we'll see this "next fic" in about...five years!
i.giphy.com/CR6SWKJrCzu1y.gif
I'm kidding
It's good to know that you've got a sequel planned.
Just...try not to cancel it. Too many of my favorite fics have been cancelled recently, and I don't think I can handle another. My heart can't take it
6935120
Don't worry. Probably the only thing that could cancel my fic would be a sudden case of Author Existence Failure.
At the moment, I currently have the Derrenverse planned to span four fics, the last two of which would cover the events of Season 3 and Season 4 of show canon.
6934063 I'm glad I was able to help.
6934710 Huh, cool. Usually people get grumpy about my brutal honesty, especially the fanatical fans who refuse to admit that their baby has warts on it or can do wrong. It's very nice to see someone else that appreciates an honest assessment of faults for a change so I'm glad I was able to help you with this.
6932368
You and your RariDash fetish.
Assuming Derren can get over his "Mare of Steel, Man of Kleenex" anxieties about putting his human penis in the earth pony vagina.
4.bp.blogspot.com/-TahRr7ackxY/UU38wPEpacI/AAAAAAAALGA/a8DAVIQYLD0/s1600/indeed.gif
That was the idea.
I blame ScrambledCrackers.
Anything to breathe new life into dank DBZ memes, eh?
Exactly. And notice that Rainy is more prone than Faran to Gibbs Slapping Derren.
Don't knock it till you try it.
That's why it will be the best drunken sex they'll ever have.
Good ol' Stargate SG-1.
You brilliant monster. I think everyone would blame him.
DBZ is love, DBZ is life.
That's just how we know Rainy will make a great lead mare.
6936559
I recall a quote from somewhere: "Admiration is the furthest emotion from understanding." It's a bit simplistic, since I feel the latter can still lead to the former... but so many get lost in the former as to want to deny the latter. ...Yeesh, that was ponderous. Anywho, by that I mean when someone just tells me something is great that's all well and good... but to come out with exacting, unapologetic details that highlight the good and bad? That's someone who understands what they're saying. Credibility, ya know? Whether I end up agreeing with the assessment takes nothing away from it being thorough, and respectable.
I didn't need to comment just to say that, but I also had a question for the author so I had to comment anyway. Jimbotex, if you don't mind, who is this 'best human' I'm seeing in the comments?
...regrettably rings no bells for me. I blame my newness to the fandom. Also... where the hay is part 2?
6940162
"Best Human" refers to a certain reformed villain from the Equestria Girls series, who also goes by the alias "Bacon Mane."
As for part 2, I just have a few more things to edit. It should be up in the morning at the latest.
6940315
Nice. I had not come across that particular moniker for her, but I don't get out much, as it were. Oh god, it does look like.... well that's not getting unseen anytime soon...
6940345
TFW you get a mental image of the dog from the Beggin' Strips commercial nomming on her hair/mane.
Damnit, if the comic hadnt dissappeared I'd show you all a proper master of the bad puns
Lol, I love The Muppet Christmas Carol. I think I've watched that every year since it came out.
6946594
About time someone noticed the reference.
Obvious quote coming in 3... 2... 1...
IT'S OVER 9000!!
Hope you continue this story it's Great!