I had been starting to wonder when you'd get back to this - I still haven't found the Eddings.

5812677 yes update too bad I am at work and cant read it.

5857498
Hint: The nurse that Our Hero first meets is an expy of Sparhawk's horse from The Elenium and The Tamuli.

5857515
Oh God. Why would you inflict that on anyone, especially a hospital? Don't they have enough people with broken bones there yet?

Oh! I see they've given him the machine which goes Bing! What a fortunate fellow he is.

5857550

It's amazing she hasn't been fired or lost her license yet for patient abuse.

5857554
The real question is: Did Celestia lease it back from the company she sold it to?

Mollari as a Griffin.
This is.... Wonderful.

I wonder if a G'Kar expy might turn up somewhere, yes? (We're in here.... I hear you.... *giggles*)

all the bedside manner of Gregory House, and sounded so stereotypically Irish that she was practically farting shamrocks

Just reading through, I had to stop and make this comment.

Literary gold.

5857610
We'll have to see.

5857575
There's probably nobody who would dare. Making Faran a quarter the size of a normal horse just means he now has his teeth on the same elevation as everyone balls as a permanent feature, instead of having to bite downward blindly.

Your human character has potential. He's pretty unique among all the HiE humans I've seen so far, and I burst out laughing when he sang that particular song.

5857646
As I said in the author's notes, wouldn't you like to know the church camp he learned it from?

5857652
Nah, I'm good. Though, I always knew Pinkie was nowhere as innocent as she comes across in the series, and the fact she actually got and appreciated the humor in the song, well...

5857675
That's Pinkie for you.

Hillarious song about the "twinkie", to bad AJ and Mr Armor didn't approve of it.

Yeah this is going well so far, hope the story will retain it's degree of uniqueness and avoid plunging into cliches.

5858032
I hope so, too.

Clichés are what The Edding is all about, though. It's kind of a stylistic theme you have now, want it or not.

5858094
That, and someone throwing their hands (or hooves) up in exasperation and exclaiming, "Ponies!" (or "Humans!")

5858108
If you want to really start driving people crazy, mention any of the female characters tugging their braids at least every other paragraph, too.

Great to see the next chapter of this come out! Although I can't help but wonder why Shining Armor reacted so negatively...

So we get a goofball lead, a Ranma 1/2, and a Skryim reference all one chapter. This is going to be an interesting ride.

5858143
Even the ones that don't have braids?

5858161
That... may not have been one of my better narrative choices. I may end up retconning that.

5858201
Yes. Yes it is. You may want to fasten your seat belts and make sure your trays are stowed in their full, upright, locked positions.

5858272 Seat belts my flanks! I have a five point safety harness, roll cage, and full crash protection. If it keeps up I may have to pull my Deadric Armor out of storage.

5858279

5858272
By the time their eyes start twitching, they'll be having flashbacks to Crossroads of Twilight already and probably not even notice anymore.

5858382
A question, Sir wlam? Should I have Our Hero address any pony he doesn't know very well as "neighbor," since I seem to be on an Elenium/Tamuli kick with the David Eddings references?

5858392
No idea, honestly. If there's one thing I disliked about Eddings, even back in the Nineties when I got the books and barely spoke any English, it was that everybody has a really, really bland way of talking. Take the names out of the dialogue and you couldn't even tell who is who. The other is that despite being the gold standard for generic, he's so narcissistic he'd rather rip himself off than introducing any new ideas.

5858494
I suppose you're right.

A griffon version of Londo Mollari. Lord help us all. But I approve!

I am really liking the story so far, keep up the good work!

I found the sentence he borrowed... it's Rarity's sentence.

5858757
Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winnah! Tell us what he's won, Johnny!

i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/034/706/winternet.jpg?1318992465

5858161
Singing a song about the goods in front of a guy's little sister and her son/little brother wouldn't lead to the best of responses.

There are so many ways to handle first meetings.

Crazy songs are always a fun choice.

5858907
And judging by her reaction, Pinkie agrees with you.

5858912 Meh, she usually starts it.

Keep up the good work.

5858940
Very true. Just ask Cranky Doodle Donkey.

5858862 True enough, but still, looking like you're about to murder a guy is a bit much.

Man, that song was hilarious. Especially Rainbow's reaction to it.

5859279
Yeah, she was all:
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/gyropedia/images/4/40/Wingboner.png/revision/latest?cb=20110611170718

5859287
That's exactly how I imagined it.

They all looked over to see that Pinkie was wearing my new pants on her head.

Why am I not surprised?

Pretty good. He's taking it pretty well, which is fine it can get annoying seeing them freak out Forever. However don't forget to portray the feeling of wonder he should be feeling when he sees and discovers new things from this point on. He may be "used" to ponies, but many other things like the weather and such should be like wide eyes moments. Anyway, liked it! Keep it up.

5858337 I have never gotten five laughing Rainbows before.

Good start, but a little too much 'eye rolling' for me. A characteristic loses meaning the more often it's used, be careful of that.

Not too many grammatical mistakes, except for one glaring one:
"-probably forgotten most of what I learned."

Should be 'learnt', but it might be different for an American dialect.

For reference:
learnt = a simple past tense and past participle of learn.
learned = having much knowledge; scholarly; erudite:learned professors.

What, you saved my life at the cost of inconveniencing me for a few months? Unacceptable!
Seriously, I wonder if the guy didn't deserve what happend to him...

Hell, I’m pretty sure that my brother, the nearest thing to a human GPS that I know of, would’ve fared about as well as Ryoga Hibiki.

Oh come on, no one's that bad...

intimidatingly sultry

I've never heard Rarity described like that, but from the POV, it hit bull's eye. .
Can I use it?

ok first I want to say I was weighting to see if there would be a chapter 2.
ok now I think you have a vary different P O V here that is working really good.
I am really liking how this story is coming to gather.
I am hopping you (JimboTex ) keep up the good work as I think this will turn in to a good story with time.
Harts Fire

5860481 Is that intentional? You're repeatedly using similar yet incorrect words in your writing.