Prologue: Karmic Creation
"Mmkay, let's see... a pinch of pixie dust...got it. Two cups of apple cider...got it. One phoenix feather...got it. Three cacao leaves...um...oh yeah, I got em. A teaspoon of unicorn saliva...man what a pain that one was, but I got it. And of course..."
Spike looked down at his arm. Just think....It's for Rarity...you can do it. Don't think about it. Just do it... And with a wince, he closed his eyes and ripped a scale straight off of his arm.
"YEOWCH!.......a...a piece of yourself. I got it...ow..."
And with that, he tossed his scale into the bubbling concoction of things before him, and it made a little splash as it melted into the mystical orange liquid. On a dark summer night such as this one, the orange glow of the potion in his black cauldron gave him just enough light to see what he doing, but fortunately it wasn't so bright it would wake up Twilight. He wished he could work in the day, when he wasn't so tired. But he couldn't let her find out what he was doing...
Spike had set up a little magic laboratory in the library, consisting of a black pot intended for alchemy, a few assorted measuring instruments, and a book entitled Magical Potions for the Non-Magical Pony. Normally, Twilight Sparkle would have probably been quite proud that her Number One Assistant was finally pursuing something intellectual and scientific. But Spike knew he had to keep this project a secret, for Twilight would surely be furious if she knew his true intentions....
Spike intended to create, in essence, a love potion. He came across the idea one day when he was sorting through Twilight's absolutely mess of a study area. He had been quite tired that evening from cleaning all day, and he accidentally dropped one the books while putting it away. Upon hitting the floor, the book had opened up, and the heading on that particular page caught Spike's eye:
"How to Create A Love Potion - A Simple Spell for Winning Anypony!"
Spike knew that this might be wrong. The moral implications of forcing somebody to be in love with you were...well, implicating. But when that title caught his eye, he couldn't help but find himself a little curious. Could it be true? Could it really be that simple to cure his heartache? He had been thinking about her all day that day, he couldn't stop himself from at least taking a look.
And thus, Spike found himself in possession of Magical Potions for the Non-Magical Pony. Spike wasn't exactly a pony, but he doubted that mattered. And when he read the instructions to find the potion would be a rather easy one to make, his temptations and desires overcame him. He rummaged through Twilight's things to find her old alchemy pot, gathered the necessary ingredients, and, well...three weeks later, it was tonight.
It had taken Spike a while to work on the potion for enough nights to get it finished. Twilight had a tendency to pull all-nighters watching the stars, or fretting over how to cope with the recent trauma of getting only a 98% on her unicorn history report. And so it took several sessions of adding ingredients to the cauldron at night, then hiding it in the kitchen cupboard before dusk. And man, was that thing heavy! It was even bigger than Spike was, so he was sure he'd gotten stronger from pushing that thing around.
And tonight, it was finished! Spike sighed with relief and wiped some stress off his brow, smiling as he admired his creation. He had done this for Rarity- his sweet, beautiful Rarity, the wonderful pony who ran the fashion shop. Soon she would be his. The thought filled his scaly stomach with butterflies...
"It won't be long now, Rarity..." he whispered. "Soon we'll be together..."
-------------
Curiously enough, when a love potion cooled down after it was finished, it was basically the color and taste of your average cup of coffee. Thus giving new meaning to the phrase, "want to come inside for a cup of coffee?"
It was now morning in Ponyville. The birds were singing the peaceful tunes of summer, and sunshine serenely flowed through the windows into Twilight Sparkle's house. Apparently such a peaceful, quiet scene was rather offensive to Twilight Sparkle's alarm clock, so it expressed its' distaste like any polite and proper pony: by screaming like a maniac and waking up everypony in the house.
Within moments Twilight Sparkle was out of bed, absentmindedly brushing her mane in front of the mirror and mentally reviewing what to put on her checklist for today.
Let's...see... she thought groggily. Rarity...coming over....ugh...sleep. Bed...no, brush. Coffee. Need coffee. I wonder what paste tastes like...mmm....it feels good to close my eyes....no! Checklist....um...Rarity....friendship report...sleep....Trollestia...Spike...all toads are frogs but not all frogs are toads.....gotta shop today.....bed. Sheets feel good like candy. I want to sleep....wait. What? Checklist....checklist....bed...shower...I NEED COFFEE!
As per usual, Twilight's thought process was a little...ah, jumbled in the morning until she had her daily cup of coffee to wake her up. Giving up on fixing her mane right now, she tossed the brush away and sleepily made her way down the stairs.
"Spike..." she called out, yawning. "Could you....*yawn*...please make me a...coffee....*yawn* There's a lot to....get done....today..."
The purple baby dragon was instantly on the scene. "You got it, Twi!" he cheerily assured her, giving her a thumbs up as he ran to the kitchen. Normally, at this time of the day Spike was hoarding away in his bed, forsaking sunlight and not waking up until much later. But today, Spike felt the same kind of excitement that made fillies everywhere wake up early on Hearth's Warming Eve. Not only was his love potion finished, but this morning Rarity was coming over! She was coming to discuss some sort of dress design or whatever with Twilight and have a few drinks. The reason didn't matter to Spike. What mattered is that this was an opportunity.
"Ya want milk in it, Twilight?" he called to her as he got out the dishes.
"Yeah....that'd be nice..."
"And how about sugar?"
"Sure...*yawn*...."
As he prepared Twilight's morning coffee, adrenaline and giddy excitement was coursing through Spikes very aura. Oh man, this was so exciting! For years, Rarity had been the pony of his dreams...he had always desired her...and finally, today might be the day! Today, she would confess her feelings for him...today they would spend time together...and maybe, if Spike played his cards right....perhaps...she might even give him a kiss...
The thought sent Spike into a lovestruck daze. His boyhood fantasy preoccupying his every thought, he went through the motions of making Twilight's coffee without really paying attention to what he was doing. He didn't really even realize he had made her coffee already. Soon, it was just...there. A cup of coffee, already hot and ready. Well that went quickly. But who cares? All that mattered was the bright future that awaited him and Rarity...he could barely see clearly as the thought enveloped his consciousness.
"Thanks, Spike..." mumbled Twilight, using her magic to retrieve her beloved morning fuel. Spike barely heard her. He could only think of the fact that Rarity would soon be here.
Oh, that's right! he thought. I better get the love potion ready before she gets here...I'll just go get the cauldron and...
*bonk*
"Huh?"
Confused, Spike rubbed his head from the mild pain. He had just walked into something...the cauldron. Wait, why was it already out? What was it doing here on the floor? Spike didn't recall leaving it out last night...yes, he specifically remembered the workout of moving it back into it's hiding place last night. And even if he did forget about it, why in Equestria would he have left it here?
It took him a few moments of standing there, until a horrific realization suddenly dawned on him.
"...Oh no."
---------------
Ah. Clarity. It was always such a refreshing feel, satiating your caffeine addiction in the morning. As the hot, bitter liquid flowed down Twilight Sparkle's throat, her critical thinking skills slowly returned to her and she found her mood instantly improving. She loved coffee.
Alright! she confidently declared in her mind. Today I should finish reading Observations of Changelings: A Report On Hive Life, and try and find something new to report to Princess Celestia! Oh, and Rarity is also coming over soon to talk about my dress for the next Gala...I guess I should prepare some drinks for her? And Spike...
"...Oh no," she then heard her Number One Assistant dreadfully whisper. The little dragon was turned away from Twilight, frozen in place. What was that about?
Ah, cute little Spike, she thought. Who knew what he was worrying about now. But it was so cute whenever he did! In fact, it was pretty cute whenever Spike did anything, what with his lovely curves and shiny scales...
Oh, Spike...you're so adorable in such a special way...you're like a ...a scaly, adorable little stallion...my Spikey-Wikey...you're so...I want to...
Wait, WHAT?
What was Twilight thinking?! What were these kinds of thoughts? She found herself blushing as she observed Spike. What was this feeling? She...she couldn't stop thinking about how adorable Spike was...no, how stallion like Spike was...she couldn't believe this...with each moment, she found herself growing hotter and hotter at the thought of her pet dragon...this couldn't be right. Maybe the caffeine was getting to her?
No. It was not getting to her. Within moments she was grabbed by a deep inner conviction. She loved Spike. Spike was the perfect pony for her, even if he wasn't really a pony. How could she have not realized it before?! It was as if she had seen him for the first time!
"Oh man. Please no. Please no....TWILIGHT!!!" Spike exclaimed in a panic. he turned around a rushed over to her.
"DON'T DRINK IT!! DON'T DRINK IT!!!" he shouted at her in a frenzy. In a display of ninja-like skills, he swiftly grabbed the coffee mug and promptly annihilated it with his dragon fire.
"Did...did you just destroy that mug?" asked Twilight rhetorically, a little startled. "Um...why?"
"Twilight!" cried Spike. "Please tell me you didn't drink that! Please!"
She didn't answer him. Instead, a mischievous grin covered Twilight's face and a seductive fire appeared in her eyes. She leaned her head down towards Spike and looked him the eye.
"Oh, the coffee? ...That doesn't matter. I think what matters more, is that we make a checklist...of all the reasons you're simply prodigious."
"Twilight!" Spike yelled in a panic, grabbing Twilight by the shoulders. Panicking, he said the first thing he thought of that could stop this. "You're...you're like a sister to me, Twilight! You know?! I view you as my older sister!"
The purple mare responded to this by leaning in next to Spike's head, and whispering sensually in his ear:
"Incest occurs in 72.3% of animals. It's natural."
....In the words of Big Mac:
NOPE.
"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" roared the baby dragon at the top of his lungs- which was quite loud, actually, considering he was a dragon. This couldn't be happening. He couldn't have Twilight Sparkle be in love with him! When he said he viewed her as a sister, he meant it! Within seconds, Spike was running away as fast as he could. He dashed out of the front door with the speed of a Wonderbolt.
What had he done?
And thus begins the story of how Spike became a stalking victim. A story that will end horribly.
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Heh heh, silly Spike.
Oh no. No no no no no.
Though there are a few mingling details in the first few lines, mere spelling and such, I just feel horrid for Spike! Now, I'm hardly one to suggest magical coercion - nature and circumstance tend to right the balance - but Twispike is a delicate tightrope! Rarity be damned!
Sadly, having quietly cheered the little scamp on from the sidelines, I selfishly want to see where this ends up. Goodness knows it'll be messy, but I have faith.
Well? Shall we see how crazy things get? Let's proceed!
No, seriously.
a pinch of pixie dust + two cups of apple cider + one phoenix feather + three cacao leaves + A teaspoon of unicorn saliva + a dragon scale = coffee
SEEMS LEGIT
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Ha, this is great. I'm looking forward to more.
Run, Spike! Run! This sounds fun, I'd like to see you continue it.
Oh this is gonna be great, poor Spike
Mas
Por favor
PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASEEEEE WRITE MORE
YES
Do keep going please.
Laughs evilly.
This sounds like it's going to be fun.
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For first story? GOOD. CONTINUE. CTHULHU DEMANDS IT.
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This looks good
And an interesting story idea
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That gap at the end made me think there was going to be some random quip at the end there, like...
... DUMPLINGS!
Anyway, very interesting concept, very well executed, and I want more.
I gotta say, it usually not easy to make me laugh so freely, but that last line by Twi cracked me considerably. The buildup helped though.
Definatly a fav, lets see how Spike will clean up his mess.
Heheh, this was a pretty hilarious set-up, if you ask me! It could've been the start of a silly, slapsticky episode, maybe, were it not for Twilight's horribly inappropriate flirting. (Which I got a kick out of.. I'm going to hell, aren't I?
)
I would also like to see where you might go with this, so please, do continue!
As for criticism: try to use ellipses a lot less. Those generally shouldn't be used in lieu of actual punctuation, particularly outside of dialogue, and even within spoken sentences it's very easy to go overboard with them. Natural speech does have lots of pauses, but you do not need to approximate this in writing for the most part. You did use them legitimately and to good effect a few times, mind you! But cutting down on the number of little dots makes those instances stand out a lot more. Using them in characters' private thoughts is more understandable, but you really don't need to go all stream-of-consciousness on us - it gets kinda of distracting, to be honest.
I do like your use of italics for emphasis, though. That, too, can be overdone, but you pretty much hit the Goldilocks zone with that technique, stressing exactly the right words, in my opinion.
But an excellent first entry, despite these minor quibbles! Kudos!
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I have to admit, I cracked up at that last line of Twilight's...even when they're being creepy, they're still adorkable!
I can't wait to see the next chapter! An awesome start!
Run away, Spike. Run far away.
Didn't you learn ANYTHING from hearts and hooves day, Spike? Way to go incapacitating the ONE UNICORN that would be able to help you out of the inevitable mess a love potion would create.
-> "Incest occurs in 72.3% of animals. It's natural."
That line was literally Laugh Out Loud funny. I really can't wait for the next chapter!
Great job, please continue! Also can't wait to see rarity's reaction to this
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Oh my goodness. This concept. And Twilight's last line really cinches this one for me.
Take my thumb and my fave.
(Sees the summary.)
............
YES! YES!!!!!!!
http://yeeeeeeeeeeeeeees.com/
(And I won't even start with how I reacted afterwards...)
Oh i cant stop laughing this is gonna be gud
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uuuuuuummmmmmm, oooookaaaaay. *backs away slowly*
other than that, take these, you deserve them!
and I loved the line about incest! Twilight is such a nerd!
Your formatting is a bit off, and even though you've mentioned this is a prologue, it seems too much like I'm jumping headfirst into something without any prior direction. There was a lack of build-up or suspense for the prologue itself, which I suggest your attention to be diverted to in order to really allow us to get into it. What you should have started off with as a comedic foreground and a suggestive background, something to tease us and get us to continue reading in suspense (In essence, a page turner). You were too direct in this, and the overall desirable effects of anticipation were made more dull than it has a right to be.
Suspense was something that I learned that, in any book, even by genre, to be essential as an element. This story has a decent enough background, but the skills to execute it have to be built. I'm considering giving this a thumbs down, but as of present, with it being a prologue, I'll defer until you've proceeded a bit more and judge if you've improved. Good luck.
bwahahaha!
i'm going to enjoy this
Loving it, can't wait to see
NOPE his way out of this
When will Flower Seven write more. I think enough ponys are interested
This is fantastic. I love this story all ready also twilights thought were gold form trollestia to drinking cofee to incest I laughed so hard
546815
What are you, a reading teacher? stop being a troll this was great in every way
568363
I'm not trolling. I'm being serious.
And as a writer, people listen to criticism to better themselves. The formatting is very off, considering everything, the background and foreground need to be re-evaluated and the writer needs to correct how she puts characters into situations or else it comes off as looking more awkward than acceptable. I stand by what I said.
It's a good, funny, concept. The execution of the concept, though, is not as well done as it should have been. Everyone has the opportunity to improve, but only if they take things in stride and build on them.
And the people leaving comments? You're supposed to give pros and cons to writers. You can't just go around giving people a pedestal to stand on. They need criticism and advice to grow. I'm not the kind of person who leaves "This story rocks" or "This story sucks" and goes on their merry way. You want to dislike something? Break it down to logical points and present it as an argument without shoving them down their throat. They listen, selectively, take it all in, and improve.
Oh wow, I did not expect such a positive reception at all!
I'm very pleased and honored that even a small handful of you enjoyed something I wrote. I'm not quite sure where to take this next, (curse ye, writer's block!) so I can't guarantee there will be more in the immediate future, but my writing desires are never predictable, so who knows. Still, thank you all very much for your positive comments and faves! 
568363
568431
Guys, don't fight.
Byakushi is entitled to his opinion, and as my own worst critic, I agree with his assertion that I could have done a lot better executing this. Before submitting this, I fully expected a mixed to negative reaction. I'm very, very happy that you love what I wrote, and appreciate you coming to the piece's defense, but please don't attack other users' opinions in my name, okay? 
That was awesome.
I just wish there was more. D:
Well this is interesting. I got say though Spike is going about this the wrong way now he needs to give Rarity a cup of the coffee. This was he can be with his adorkable and apparently very horny surrogate sister and also his hot and true love Rarity (who we can also hope is horny)! You got this Spike activate the swag (love potion).
I imagine Twi jumping like pepe le pew xD
Spike :yaomingew:
This is going to be goood.
If this gets explicit I'm going to Bucking troll you to the end of time.
I start wondering if this story will ever be continued...
Is that 72.3% thing true?
A Spilight......right? Count me in good sire, I will review each and every chapter, I LOVE Spilight!!!! Also:ambris.deviantart.com/art/Twilight-Sparkle-Approved-262120085
568431 Holy buck....your good dear sire.
This is hilarious. Silly Spike-you just found a love potion is a bad idea.
All of my yes DIS GON B GUD!
Wait...why can't I stop laughing?! Help!