For Twilight Sparkle it was an ordinary day in her castle. She had pulled an all-nighter reading and Spike was still fast asleep. Twilight had no intention of getting out of her comfortable bed until she felt hungry.
“Ah, this this amazing! I can sit around and read all day. Princess Celestia and Luna take care of all the challenging tasks and Cadance takes care of all foreign affairs. That leaves me to do nothing but read in the castle library.” She lay down on a loveseat next to her and opened a book called “The History of Unreliable Narrators” which was the size of her head, to page one and started to read. “Chapter O-”
KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!
Annoyed, Twilight got up and dragged herself to the door. She would have normally sent Spike, but he’s asleep. He went on a trip with Rarity to find gemstones and he walked in and passed out. Twilight opened the door and looked outside.
“Hello Twilight.”
Twilight instantly slammed the door shut and started cleaning up the place. She hid her book about pony anatomy and instead pulled out a book on friendship. She moved a stack of papers on the desk and a quill ready to write on the side. Ten quick seconds later she opened the door again.
“Hello Twilight.”
Princess Celestia stood at Twilight’s doorstep with Princess Luna not far behind her.
“Hi Princess Celestia and Luna! Come right in!” Twilight stepped aside, letting the Princesses inside. The Princesses walked past Twilight and sat down on a couch inside. After shutting the door Twilight turned around and smiled.
“Can I help you with anything, Princesses?” Twilight asked. To Twilight’s surprise, Princess Celestia didn’t answer with “No” or “just visiting”. Instead, she replied with,
“Yes, actually. You can. See, Lulu and I accidentally burned down the castle and we need a place to stay…” The word “Stay” lingered in the air for a couple seconds and then turned to an awkward silence.
“Enough with the quiet! We had enough on the moon!” Luna snorted, breaking the silence. Twilight just stared.
“You burned down the castle? How? HOW DO YOU BURN DOWN A MAGICAL CASTLE?” Twilight screamed. She seemed more frustrated with the castle burning down than the Princesses staying at her’s. “YOU ENCHANTED THE BUCK OUT OF IT! HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO START A FIRE STRONG ENOUGH TO BURN IT?” Twilight suddenly calmed down and asked, “Ooooooh… Was it an extremely powerful experimental spell?”
“Actually, Tia and I were baking cakes… and TIA left her cake in the oven too long. Emphasis on Tia.” Luna replied.
“My fault? It’s that idiot Blueblood’s fault. That pile of excrement can’t keep his snout out of trouble for five minutes. He can’t shut it either. If it wasn’t for him our castle would be fine! “ Celestia retorted.
“True… Tia, I honestly don’t see how he’s related to us.”
“Neither do I.”
Twilight seemed to be missing from the conversation, and sure enough, she was. She was too busy trying to process the immense stupidity coming from her mentor’s mouth. She always thought anything she said had some sort of psychological or philosophical meaning. She’s about to get a whole different view on the rulers of Equestria.
One Hour Later-
“Would you like more pancakes Princess Celestia?”
“I thought I told you to call me Celestia or Tia. And yes, pass me the syrup.”
“Sorry. Here you go.”
Princess Luna and Celestia settled down in the castle. Twilight never said yes or no, so they both assumed yes. There’s no backing out of it now. That’s probably why many royal subjects call Celestia “Trollestia”.
Spike and the Three Princesses all sat around a banquet table. Spike had cooked some delicious blueberry pancakes and made… Protein shakes? Sure. Why not? Luna had scarfed down six servings, and Celestia was on her third. Twilight was on her second helping, while Spike was racing Luna and working on his fifth. Nothing will ever explain how he can eat that much.
After a surprising eleven servings (and a victory from Luna), Luna got up and thanked Spike for the wonderful “dinner challenge” and went off to find her room. Spike said he wasn’t feeling good and ran off to find the bathroom. He’s still not used to the massive castle and gets lost easily. Now only Twilight and Celestia remained at the table. Twilight hasn’t spoken much since the Princesses arrived. She’s apparently still dumbfounded about the burning of the most structurally sound building in Equestria. Celestia was visibly getting annoyed by Twilight now. She couldn’t hold her tongue anymore. She just had to explain what happened.
“It WAS LUNA’S FAULT! She completely forgot about the cake we put in the oven. LUNA SUCKS!”
Celestia then quickly gathered herself again and got up.
“Thank you for brunch. I’ll be heading off to my quarters now. I have some official business to take care of.” And with that, Celestia left to go find her room. A confused Twilight was left at the table.
“I know I shouldn’t judge what the Princesses do in their own time, but holy Celestia! They’re like children! How do they run a country? Especially Luna, but I can let that pass. She did spend a thousand years on the moon. Celestia though… I’m a bit concerned.”
Spike walked back in the room to finish his eighth serving. Twilight better get used to the Princesses behavior soon, or she’ll be more than confused.
“The ceiling’s right Twilight. Besides, I think Princess Luna is pretty cool. Celestia doesn’t act like she has a stick up her butt anymore. Sure, they don’t act like princesses when they’re off duty, but that’s not your business.”
“Shut up and eat, Spike.”
Structurally sound? It sits on the edge of a cliff face. I am stilll tryiing to wrap my head around why that would be a good idea for a capitol, much less a single castle easily burned down by a cake in a oven.
5018551
"Magic"
Solution: Burn down YOUR castle, and go live with Cadance. She may be able to turn down the other two because of Luna, but who is she to turn down her own sister-in-law?
Here are some wise words.
"Growing is inevitable. Growing up is optional."
5018851 good plan! 10/10
5018855 I like that. I basically follow that law. Everyone on here does.
5018898 Yep, I am growing old as well, but growing up?
Quoting AJ: Hmmmm.... nah
This has all the showings of an awesome and hilarious story, so definitely following this
*sees all the groups that a bad story should be in have this story*
*sees the like-dislike ratio*
Ok then
5029805 Wait really?
5030019
I think they thought this was going to suck, then it gets on the popular list.
5030033
th09.deviantart.net/fs71/PRE/i/2011/288/9/d/trollestia_by_snowpeak-d4cyw5i.png
5024647
They have a video of that, you know.
5029805
Not always the case, man. The ratio doesn't mean good. Almost all of those downvotes are specifically because the parasprite brought it to public attention as a bad fic that got way too much positive feedback and no negative.
This story doesn't seem bad at a glance, and its being added to the other troll groups doesn't necessarily mean much. That's probably where most all of the downvotes came from, in fact. Just remember that any user can add it for any reason they want, and it's going to happen from time to time.
5030898
"downvotes" All 11 of them...
5030906
Exactly. Seems pretty ridiculous when it's being added to badfic groups despite no one even bothering to hit the downvote button. Like I said, anyone can add it, man.
5030913
I think parasprite was just her in usually bitchy mood and spammed this into groups.
I think she should take the week off from Knights.
5030917
This one? I don't know who added it.
The other fic, I've read and given a review for. It doesn't deserve any of those upvotes.
5030898 yeah I know there's a vid for that, I was just too lazy for the embed
That ceiling though.
*Reads description*
i.imgflip.com/1bij.jpg
One does not simply burn down a castle made out of stone.
That wasn't half bad...
Continue, I am amused thus far.
5037304
What are you talking about?
5052960
Apparently, people seem to like my three year old sense of humor
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw8237-2bd.gif
5091390
Are you referencing Spongebob?
5092408
Oh! HAAHA YEAH.
I completely forgot about that XD
Yeah, I was referencing Spongebob.
5093075 Then I salute you o great and powerful ceiling!!!
5051397 Meet Celestia and Luna, who can both do half-assed things like that.
I can't wait to see what kind of shit they do to annoy Twi.
5051397 THERMITE. That is all.
5318090
THE CAKE IS THERMITE
Indent
And wasn't Spike in the bathroom? Or in his case lost in the labrynthian passages leading to one? When'd he come back?
Tabby's dying. So I'll get back to this later.
___________
Best ending to a chapter
For some reason while I am reading this, I keep hearing Sam Elliot's voice as the narrator. Perhaps I've just watched The Big Lebowski too many times.
Hahaha, nice!
Good work.
Lots of paragraphs need indenting in this chapter.
Very good question, you see -
*Jumps through a window*