Heaven is Equestria

by KingHoole

The Dinner Party

Chapter 6: The Dinner Party

I woke up at around 5:00 P.M. and I needed to get ready. I don’t have anything special to wear; maybe I can drop by Rarity’s shop and see if she has anything I could afford. Twilight gave me eighty bits. I wonder if that’s enough, because I want Twilight’s parents to like me. I was laying in bed when suddenly Jet and Big Macintosh barged through the door. They seem a little... drunk if you ask me.

“Uh, hey how’s it going guys?” I asked them.

“Gizmo, you should have stayed. Big Mac brought down a bottle of liquor to the south field and this stuff is *hick* strong!” Jet said in a dazed tone.

“Eeyup!”

“Okay well I need to get ready for the party, I’ll see you later.”

He held out his wing impeding me from passing him and said, “Dude, a party without me?! That’s so lame, can I come with you?”
“I don’t know, you seem really drunk.”
“Pfft, I’m not that drunk *hick*. Besides Big Mac can sober me up, right Mac?”

“Eeyup!”

“Alright fine, you get sober while I get some clothes.”

I walked out of the farm house and I realized how disappointed I am in myself for letting him come along, but then again it’s Jet. He wouldn’t ruin something important to me.
I swear the walk from the farm to Ponyville is a nightmare! I don’t know how Applejack does it. I finally got to Rarity’s and I walked inside and saw Rarity struggling with a dress she was making, and she was covered in thread.

“Here, let me help you out there.” I approached her and removed all the threading from her mane, behind her ears, and around her legs.

“Thank you sir, um I don’t believe I got your name the last time I saw you.”

“Oh of course it’s Gizmo.”

“Pleasure to meet you Gizmo!”

“Pleasure’s all mine!”

“Was there anything you needed?” She said continuing to work on her dress.

“Oh, right I need a suit for a dinner party I’m having with Twilight’s parents.”

“Oh Twilight! She is a great friend of mine, so just name your price and I’ll make you look fabulous.”

“Haha thank you. Twilight gave me 80 bits for work today so I guess I’ll just go all out. I don’t really have anything else to buy!”

“Of course I have just the thing for you!”

She decended into the back room where she stored all of her clothes, accessories, etc. She came out with an awesome brown p-coat and a blue scarf. I marveled at the outfit she picked for me, because it perfectly matched my persona. It is casual, yet professional. The question is how do I put it on?

“Would you like to try it on?” Rarity asked me.

“Oh no that’s perfect. Could you wrap it up for me?”

“Of course I can. Follow me, darling.” She began to trot over to the front counter. I followed her and she took out a box and neatly folded the outfit in the box.

“Now that will be 75 bits.”

“Of course here you go.” I handed her a little pouch filled with the bits.

I picked up the box, and began to walk away when Rarity called out to me.

“Uh Gizmo, do you not have a saddlebag?”

“No I’m afraid not, do you have any for sale?”

“Oh here you can take this one, free of charge of course.” She pulled out a tan, military style sattlebag.

“Thanks Rarity um why for free?”

“It was my dad’s old bag. I have no use for it, so you’re doing me a favor by taking it.”

“Thanks you so much Rarity! I hope to see you again soon.”

Rarity waved goodbye to me as I walked out the door, and I slipped the box of clothes in the bag Rarity gave me. Now I get to check on Jet and Mac.

I got to Sweet Apple Acres and saw Mac and Jet underneath an apple tree, laying there having a conversation.

“So are you guys still drunk?” I said as I approached them slowly.

“Nnope.” Mac said.

“Yah it was pretty easy we just-”

I cut Jet off and said, “Well I guess you don’t have an outfit for the party.”

“Is it that big of a deal? Ponies hardly wear clothes anyway.” Jet said.

“You can borrow one of my button up shirts, they don’t fit me anymore.” Mac said getting up from his comfortable spot underneath the tree.

“That’s great! Thanks Mac.” Jet said, clearly excited for the dinner party.

Jet and I were finally ready for the party. We got our swag (a word i use jokingly because it pisses us both off), our cologne that Mac let us borrow, and our positive party attitudes. We left Sweet Apple Acres to head to a fancy restaurant called “La Rose D’or” which is french for “The Golden Rose.” Which meant we had to act respectful, mature, and poise.
We arrived at La Rose D’or and we saw Twilight and her parents sitting patiently. I walked up to the table nervous and I greeted them with a bow and said, “Good evening Mr. and Mrs. Sparkle, this is my great friend Jetfire. He is new here as well.”

“Welcome to Ponyville Jetfire. It’s great to meet you.” Twlight and her parents said in unison.

“Oh well it’s great to meet you ponies too.” Jet said with an awkward smile.

“You may sit down.” Mr. Sparkle said hold his hoof out to the two open chairs.

I went to sit down and as soon as I put my flank on the cushioned part of the chair. I slid down in Lyra position, and that must mean Lyra doesn’t know how to sit either. I sat up as quickly as I could, and tried to stay that way.

“So Gizmo I heard you enjoy writing.” Said Mrs. Sparkle

“Oh yes he does! He wrote a story about an apocalypse and a family of ponies trying to survive.” Twilight said expressing her nerdy attitude.

“Wow that’s a wonderful plot!” Mr. Sparkle said.

“Hehe plot.” Jet said to himself. I turned to him and nudged him in arm.

“Why thank you, it is something I thought about a long time ago. It’s based off a dream I had.”

“Wow that’s amazing!” Twilight said.

A waiter came to our table and Mrs. Sparkle asked for there finest bottle of wine. My heart sunk thinking about it, because I’d never had wine before.

“Sweet!” Jet said with an excited look on his face.

“Haha do you enjoy wine?” Mrs. Sparkle asked.

“Of course, who doesn’t!”

The waiter brought us a bottle of wine and five glasses. Twilight used her magic to pour us all glasses. Twilight’s father rose his glass and spoke in a loud booming voice, “Attention everypony! I would like to propose a toast.” He cleared his throat, “Here’s to the new members of Ponyville! One of them being a damn fine writer, who will make it big one day; and his loving friend! You, Gizmo and Jetfire, have great attitudes, and we welcome that here in Ponyville.” He turned to us, “You two have what it takes to make a difference in all of Equestria, and I’m positive you will!” He sat back down as everypony began to clap their hooves together. A tear ran down my face for receiving such a heartwarming speech. I grabbed my glass and we all bumped each others glasses. I took a sip of the wine, and it was lovely!

“This is great!” I said while enjoying the bittersweet aftertaste of the wine.

“It’s their best wine!” Twilight said.

We sat around for a while talking about Ponyville, movies (didn’t know they existed here), books, and food. They were wonderful ponies, and I don’t think I have ever met anyone in the real world this friendly.
We finished our meal which was possibly the greatest meal I have ever had, and Twilights mother ordered us a drink called “Cumulus.” Which was supposedly a strong alcoholic beverage.

“Uh is that a good idea?” Twilight asked.

“Of course it is, we have to show our new friends some fun.” Twilight’s father said.

“Oh this will be good.” I said to Jet in a nervous voice.

The waiter brought out a large clear bottle with a cyan liquid inside of it, and resembled the blue Gatorade. I took a sip and as soon as the liquid touched my tongue I cringed a little, but the aftertaste was very good and was better than the drink itself. Which I must say is very strange.

2 Hours Later

So that drink is way stronger than I expected. We drank about half the bottle and everypony is completely drunk off their flanks. Twilight and I are probably the only ponies who are not as drunk as the others, but our judgment is still very clouded. Jet leaned over in his chair to me and said, “Dude I got a great idea... Let’s teepee the schoolhouse!” Twilight’s dad hopped up.

“That’s a splendid idea Jet!” He said with much enthusiasm.

“I don’t know guys. The cutie mark crusaders go there and I think they’re pretty cool gals...” I wobbled around in my chair a bit.

“Those fillies are crazy! They almost made Cheerlie and Big Mac get married.” Twilight said while her eyes slightly drifted apart, or as we say it, “derped.”

“Oh c’mon Gizmo, let’s have a little fun!” Twilights mother said.

I agreed even though I knew it was a bad idea, then something hit me. Ponies use toilet paper?
We arrived at the schoolhouse, and to be honest with you I have no idea where all this toilet paper came from. Everypony began to toss the tissue roles at the school house and I looked over at Twilight. She was standing looking rather sad. I looked down at the toilet paper that I was levitating and thought of a idea to make the ponies stop.

“TOILET PAPER FIGHT!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. Instantly the ponies turned from the schoolhouse and began throwing the rolls at one another. Twilight’s face lit up as she grabbed a few of her own and focused her fire on her parents. I thought to myself that this will be a memory that will last a long time.

Comments

[Azure Feather]

Last and uhh write faster please if you dont mind

[Dyami]

354186 That's why I was surprised!

[Inkwaber]

353727 On the contrary, I actually i think you guys should slow down with the writing and add more to the chapters. But eh, what am i saying? I'm not a writer. Keep up the good work!

[Dyami]

Sorry if this chapter takes a while... Lately Jetfire has not been writing, and practically refuses to due so. So again sorry for the inconvenience you may have to wait longer than expected... to the expense of Jet

[OldDrunkBastard]

This is quite literally the worst piece of literature I have ever read in my life

[da_maul]

write quicker so that i can laugh at this

[Ultimatum]

Write please just finish